My girlfriend of three years just confessed to me that she used to be a man
913 replies, posted
[QUOTE=Kaihong;37677562]Could she possibly go back to being a man?[/QUOTE]
trans people can shapeshift at will. it is a horrible side-effect of the surgery
[QUOTE=Bobie;37677603]trans people can shapeshift at will. it is a horrible side-effect of the surgery[/QUOTE]
oh god how terrifying
[QUOTE=Kaihong;37677620]oh god how terrifying[/QUOTE]
It's featured in a lot of the horrible hentai out there
[QUOTE=VIOLATION_SNG;37677550]She became a woman the moment she decided she was. I myself have no medications right now and have had no surgeries, yet I consider myself a woman and a female, because I am.[/QUOTE]
So male and female is just something you can choose? That's your opinion and you're views on the matter, not everyone shares your definition of a woman. People have their own definitions of what it is to be a woman, it's perfectly resonable to say females are able to have babies, because while there are conditions that prevent women from having children they will probably have a uterus and other characteristics that would have let them bear a child even they don't function correctly they still have them while males don't.
Edit: Though I'll add that this isn't my view, like I said I don't think it's black and white. I don't see why i would need to put someone in either the male or female box in the first place it's too complex, for the sake of politeness I would refer to someone who wants to be known as woman as a woman.
[QUOTE=JohnnyGoGo;37677646]So male and female is just something you can choose? That's your opinion and you're views on the matter, not everyone shares your definition of a woman. People have their own definitions of what it is to be a woman, it's perfectly resonable to say females are able to have babies, because while there are conditions that prevent women from having children they will probably have a uterus and other characteristics that would have let them bear a child even they don't function correctly they still have them while males don't.[/QUOTE]
You can be whatever you want, and if you feel you are a female like I, then you are one. It's honestly incredibly moronic to try and define a Female just by the ability to give birth.
Wouldn't you notice she doesn't have a period?
[QUOTE=VIOLATION_SNG;37677662]You can be whatever you want, and if you feel you are a female like I, then you are one. It's honestly incredibly moronic to try and define a Female just by the ability to give birth.[/QUOTE]
were not defining them by the ability to give birth, were defining them by the fact that they have female organs
[QUOTE=VIOLATION_SNG;37677550]She became a woman the moment she decided she was. I myself have no medications right now and have had no surgeries, yet I consider myself a woman and a female, because I am.[/QUOTE]
Would you like me to send you this Progynon Depot medication that I have? I don't have any use for it.
Also, I just spoke to her about some more things, like the medication she takes, and I'm now worried for her health as well. I looked at the side effects of Progynon Depot and Progesterone and I've read that they can cause cancer with long-term use. She says that she will have to take them for the rest of her life. Is there a chance that I could lose her? At the moment it feels like we'll be together forever.
[editline]15th September 2012[/editline]
[QUOTE=joost1120;37677678]Wouldn't you notice she doesn't have a period?[/QUOTE]
We never talked about it, and it's not something that I would just randomly ask her.
[QUOTE=andrey191919;37677690]Would you like me to send you this Progynon Depot medication that I have? I don't have any use for it.
Also, I just spoke to her about some more things, like the medication she takes, and I'm now worried for her health as well. I looked at the side effects of Progynon Depot and Progesterone and I've read that they can cause cancer with long-term use. She says that she will have to take them for the rest of her life. Is there a chance that I could lose her? At the moment it feels like we'll be together forever.
[editline]15th September 2012[/editline]
We never talked about it, and it's not something that I would just randomly ask her.[/QUOTE]
Why would you give me medication that is hers? HRT Medications are very unlikely to give off any side effects or cause anything. It's just like any other drug or medicine you see anywhere. They have to put these things on there to avoid law suits because maybe 1 person had this condition after taking it. Trust me in that she will have no health issues.
Tell her your gay.
[QUOTE=GeneralMoosen;37677711]Tell her your gay.[/QUOTE]
Well, she [i]did[/i] used to be a man
[QUOTE=VIOLATION_SNG;37677706]Why would you give me medication that is hers? HRT Medications are very unlikely to give off any side effects or cause anything. It's just like any other drug or medicine you see anywhere. They have to put these things on there to avoid law suits because maybe 1 person had this condition after taking it. Trust me in that she will have no health issues.[/QUOTE]
It's not hers, she gave this one glass thing of it.
I've mostly got over it now, and I would say that having a transsexual girlfriend is great. She has a sex drive that matches mine and jumps me at random times<3 And is into being tied up etc.
[QUOTE=overpain;37677731]Well, she [i]did[/i] used to be a man :v:[/QUOTE]
Tell him your gay.
I do still kinda feel deceived though. I've been around her family regularly and they didn't say anything either.
[QUOTE=andrey191919;37677740]It's not hers, she gave this one glass thing of it.
I've mostly got over it now, and I would say that having a transsexual girlfriend is great. She has a sex drive that matches mine and jumps me at random times<3 And is into being tied up etc.[/QUOTE]
well im glad this thread had a happy ending. best of luck brah, you made a good decision to keep on with it
i wouldn't feel decieved, im not really knowledgeable about trans stuff but i couldn't possibly imagine the guilt and pressure society puts on you [i]not[/i] to reveal secrets like that without ridicule. it would be horrible; she just needs somebody she loves to tell her that being trans is ok and it'll all blow over.
[QUOTE=andrey191919;37677788]I do still kinda feel deceived though. I've been around her family regularly and they didn't say anything either.[/QUOTE]
Well, her family wouldn't want to say it to you behind her back - that would be an incredibly horrible move.
[QUOTE=andrey191919;37677788]I do still kinda feel deceived though. I've been around her family regularly and they didn't say anything either.[/QUOTE]
Honestly she never deceived you in my opinion. She was and is a woman so really nothing changed basically besides that fact that you now know she cannot bear a child.
[QUOTE=andrey191919;37677740]It's not hers, she gave this one glass thing of it.
I've mostly got over it now, and I would say that having a transsexual girlfriend is great. She has a sex drive that matches mine and jumps me at random times<3 And is into being tied up etc.[/QUOTE]
awww it's like a happy ending to a queer romance novel
[QUOTE=Jeep-Eep;37677565]Not really. A lot of women have trouble getting enough lube to be confortable, at least in a reasonable space of time.[/QUOTE]
After 3 years of no natural lubrication, I personally would've asked about it at some point.
[QUOTE=Van-man;37675385]Bang her.
Did it feel good, then no worries.
Otherwise it's up to the magic 8-ball.[/QUOTE]
Did you seriously just get rated 'dumb'? Here's a big shock, Van-man is actually pretty darn spot-on. Sex is a great way of gauging is things are still going somewhat smoothly for either, and in this case, the both of you.
Best of luck. Although if it didn't bother you before, and you didn't even quite notice, why should it bother you now huh?
personally I'd break up with her simply because of trust issues.
three years is a fucking long time quite honestly, and I believe if I were in the same situation. that said person should've told me sooner, and NOT three years later.
[QUOTE=Greenen72;37677595]yeah, but then there's hysterectomy[/QUOTE]
So? [QUOTE]people who lose their genitals in industrial accidents are still the same sex (a man without a penis is still a man)[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=andrey191919;37677788]I do still kinda feel deceived though. I've been around her family regularly and they didn't say anything either.[/QUOTE]
Nothing wrong with feeling deceived, because you were. I assume you understand anyway, but the importance is understanding why you were deceived. If you take this issue up with her make sure she knows its about that and not her gender.
Best of luck of to you both though, respect for not letting this damage a what sounds like good relationship.
[QUOTE=Van-man;37675385]Bang her.
Did it feel good, then no worries[/QUOTE]
said the paedophile
i'd imagine a woman who use to be a man chose to go back to being a man it would be like when you put something into google translate and then translate it back to the original language again
try it in korean
[QUOTE=Splurgy_A;37677592]Yeah, pretty much.
It's very hard to define it otherwise. You could say being XX or XY makes you a woman but you have [url=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/XX_male_syndrome]XX males[/url] and [url=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Androgen_insensitivity_syndrome]XY women[/url]. You could say having a vagina or a penis makes you a woman or a man, but then people who lose their genitals in industrial accidents are still the same gender so it can't be that (a man without a penis is still a man), plus [url=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Intersex]not everyone is born with a penis or a vagina[/url]. You could argue that gender is the result of socialisation but [url=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Reimer]that doesn't seem to be true[/url].
All the evidence seems to suggest that gender is something fairly innate, but something that isn't necessarily tied to sex. That's why gender reassignment surgery is available on the NHS and considered non elective and non postponable.[/QUOTE]
This.
Generally there's no clean way to slice up people into different genders and still have it remain consistent and intuitive. There are 2 large clusters of people that share many things such as chromosomes, gamete production, physical features, behavioral traits, but it's messy around the periphery and you have to consider those individuals on their own terms. Asking whether someone in this disputed zone is "really" male or female can a useful heuristic for many things such as which pronoun is acceptable to use and how to fill out on a tax return, but it is strictly meaningless.
Does it matter?
You've been together for 3 years. Obviously you like her the way she is. Does it matter what she was before?
[QUOTE=SgtCr4zyGunz;37677503]i was more taking issue with the fact that he was judging a woman's "womanliness" (for lack of a better term) by their ability to give birth. if it's truly that important to him that he has kids by natural means then he can date whoever he wants.[/QUOTE]
That's exactly what men do, when they look at a woman's figure they are looking at the size of her hips - the more they stand out the better from when we're born we see bigger hips as a sign of fertility. The size of her breasts - her ability to feed a child. That hourglass shape is attractive to a very high majority from birth. Obviously this doesn't apply to everyone but it most certainly applies to a lot of people, there are studies into this.
[url]http://www.livescience.com/9834-hourglass-figures-affect-men-brains-drug.html[/url]
[url]http://www.plosone.org/article/info%3Adoi%2F10.1371%2Fjournal.pone.0009042[/url]
[url]http://www.themedguru.com/20100226/newsfeature/hourglass-figure-turns-men-study-86132446.html[/url]
So, long story short, can she make kids, or not?
I honestly don't know what I'd do in this situation. I'd like to think that I wouldn't break up with her, and then see if I can get over it.
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