It definitely does help out the character standout more in a background. I understand it's frowned upon to do black outlines all around because it takes away the volume, but it's a style I like.
I've never heard of sel-out before so I'll check that out.
You basically incorporate the outline into your figure and shade the outline itself based on the light source. Since the idea of an outline is based on the contrast between the background and the character and it just emphasizes that shift in color, shading the outline will make the sprite look more volumetric since it's adding weight basically to the shadows. It's explained well in the pixel art tutorial on pixeljoint
I suppose this is kind of related. At around the 5 minute mark, the guy mentions that he uses his outlines as a mask to paint darker colours onto the outlines instead of keeping them black.
[media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2AoulheUIWQ&list=UU-1rx8j9Ggp8mp4uD0ZdEIA[/media]
Currently a work in progress colour final for my course. I'm not the most adept with paints, this is my 3rd painting. If anyone could give some crits that would be really useful. This is a temp photo and not a scan because *bla bla bla* excuses.
[img_thumb]https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/8557473/facepunch/Drawing/bradfinal-temp.jpg[/img_thumb]
Done using gouache because I love it.
-ref
[img_thumb]https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/8557473/facepunch/Drawing/SAM_0078.JPG[/img_thumb]
The ref was taken on an overcast day so I tried to brighten my painting up a bit while I was doing it.
That looks pretty awesome, though I would say don't be afraid to have the stump and the ground mix into each other, you don't really want that edge between them to show. Otherwise I would use more gray on the ground and don't do that stippling thing for the grass, it looks very our of place. You want the focus to be on the stump itself. You should have tried to center it on the middle of the page though, right now it's kind of breaking apart cause of the bottom.
[QUOTE=Lilyo;44731125]That looks pretty awesome[/QUOTE]
Thanks very much, your a really accomplished painter so to hear that from you is really cool. Big boost.
[QUOTE=Lilyo;44731125]though I would say don't be afraid to have the stump and the ground mix into each other, you don't really want that edge between them to show. Otherwise I would use more gray on the ground and don't do that stippling thing for the grass, it looks very our of place. You want the focus to be on the stump itself. You should have tried to center it on the middle of the page though, right now it's kind of breaking apart cause of the bottom.[/QUOTE]
Okay I'm gonna work with the stuff you just said and re-upload in a few days (going to be busy). The composition is something I defiantly agree with, I messed up my sketch at the start and just didn't fix it, its biting me in the ass now though.
[IMG]http://fc02.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2014/125/6/f/solitary___third_person_shooter_hud_concept_by_doctornuriel-d7havzk.jpg[/IMG]
Third person shooter HUD mockup made with Photoshop and the Hammer Editor. The HUD would be projected spatially next to the player character, like in The Division.
The HUD includes a side-scrolling compass, a regenerating armor/shield bar, a health bar divided into five sections so that it regenerates only partially, an ammo counter, and a usable item indicator (in this case a health kit thingy, of which the player in this mockup carries two).
It's sloppy, but I'm satisfied with it. I'll rework it to be less obstructive - make it more compact, add transparency, etc.
Thanks to my friend Counselor Piper for the character model.
drew the left hand with my right and the right with my left
[IMG]http://i.imgur.com/pxqgxad.png[/IMG]
[QUOTE=Tovip;44733908]drew the left hand with my right and the right with my left
[IMG]http://i.imgur.com/pxqgxad.png[/IMG][/QUOTE]
I hope you weren't planning on any running.
I made a bike
[img]http://i.imgur.com/NSAD7Kt.png[/img]
Based on this bike
[img]http://i.imgur.com/Lj1n4Pq.jpg[/img]
[URL]https://www.dropbox.com/s/rxfg7lbah6qct8w/wip.docx[/URL]
I wanted to write a story but then I don't think I'm very good at writing so I am looking for someone to tear me up :S
it's not done either but i wanted to share before i got too far
I made a quick sketch for a comic I'm making for someone's birthday.
[img_thumb]http://i.imgur.com/fhhfsrN.png[/img_thumb]
I'm making it as a surprise so I can't really ask her for input, anything I should add/remove/amend before I start polishing? (Oh and I will be using references then)
[QUOTE=red_pharoah;44735995]I made a quick sketch for a comic I'm making for someone's birthday.
[img_thumb]http://i.imgur.com/fhhfsrN.png[/img_thumb]
I'm making it as a surprise so I can't really ask her for input, anything I should add/remove/amend before I start polishing? (Oh and I will be using references then)[/QUOTE]
The empty background page space at the face and eye close-up is irking me, its runing the flow of your page. Try making the face panel larger, overlay the eye shot right on top of that panel, so you leave less empty in the back. You could eve (possibly) make the face a proper sized panel and layer the eye show in the middle between it and the next panel, bottom left panels should be separated like any other.
It would also be nice to see either a bit more variety or a bit more same-ness with panel shapes, since it is so close to all being the same (except those squar e overlays and the quare beside them to match size) that they either look too close, or just slightly of in a "i tried to add some different panels half way through" way.
Would be nice to see more different shots, every panel with a character (not counting two square panels again) is pretty much in a "mid shot" range. the fourth and last panels could both easily be done more close-up, the 6th could also do with a bit over overlapping between the two characters, add more depth. Even just the edge of his silhouette showing a closer over the shoulder
just some suggestions to try while I stared at it for a bit
[QUOTE=Rhenae;44737460]The empty background page space at the face and eye close-up is irking me. [/quote]
Yeah it was bugging me as well, thanks for the suggestion.
[quote]the 6th could also do with a bit over overlapping between the two characters, add more depth. Even just the edge of his silhouette showing a closer over the shoulder
just some suggestions to try while I stared at it for a bit[/QUOTE]
Oddly enough, the sixth frame only has one character, the woman is actually a giant golden statue/idol seen in the distance, but yeah I'll definitely try making it more over-the-shoulder.
I'm not sure I understand the "add more variety/sameness part" though, could you please elaborate?
[QUOTE=Fire Kracker;44735421][URL]https://www.dropbox.com/s/rxfg7lbah6qct8w/wip.docx[/URL]
I wanted to write a story but then I don't think I'm very good at writing so I am looking for someone to tear me up :S
it's not done either but i wanted to share before i got too far[/QUOTE]
Well, since you asked-
Yeah, I'm sorry, it's not very good. The narrative style is very course. "But obsessed with what?" is a good example of a question that your audience doesn't need to be told to ask. You need to lead them to that question instead of just saying it out loud. Your first sentence is the most important, but it's in a hell of a state currently. You need to be more methodical, and carefully consider whether you want the very first foot out of the gate to be mumbling about some sort of non-sun light source aimed at 'rubble' that's awkwardly related to a bridge.
There's nothing wrong with introducing your character by their first name the first time they're mentioned. I appreciate the effort of us reading a nametag, but it's ham-fisted and comes off more offensive to the reader than anything. Again, consider that you're three sentences in and we're reading a name tag off of the clothing of the person wearing it.
"His helmet with a" should read "His helmet, with" But you need to re-arrange the sentence and the order of "The matte white visor of his helmet obscures his face" because the subject is the visor and it's modifying, obscuring, his face.
Oh and did you seriously name him 'Hiro' and have him state, verbally or otherwise, that he wants "to be a hero"?? Not only that but as the only sentence of your second paragraph?! That's simply unacceptable. What's your intended audience, third graders?
I get that you're trying to paint this dramatic picture of him struggling to recover from being placed in a mysterious bridge-rubble incident, but it's clumsy as ever. You've made the effort to describe the symptoms of his injuries, an honorable attempt at 'show-don't-tell', it's just awkward. It's hard to put my finger on anything specifically other than saying scrap it all, but a solid example is 'a trail of blood originating from him'. Originating? How? Through osmosis? From his handy-dandy blood dispenser? You can choose either to name an injury or to leave this detail to our imagination, but you can't just say 'blood appears somehow' and call it a day.
'The ground takes Hiro' is an ambitious attempt at a sentence, but it could do better if it actually made sense. Does it mean he's fallen over? Or the ground has literally turned into a sentient concrete-bridge-rubble-creature and scooped him up?
So anyways, you've got to focus on what's actually happening first. Right now a guy gets up from a pile of stuff, makes a god-awful pun, and then collapses again. Consider rewriting your intro so that we actually have a reason to give a shit and work from there. If I were in your shoes I might try to find a different moment to start your story from, so we can get a sense of who this character actually is, rather than just knowing that they have a strange bird helmet and a nametag.
Working on a dieselpunkish sort of flying battleship design. Would love to hear from any fellow machine-fetishists on what they think of it.
[IMG]http://s21.postimg.org/w5opmh4lx/Laneship.png[/IMG]
The insignia is just a spoof i had lying around. :v:
[QUOTE=red_pharoah;44737650]Yeah it was bugging me as well, thanks for the suggestion.
Oddly enough, the sixth frame only has one character, the woman is actually a giant golden statue/idol seen in the distance, but yeah I'll definitely try making it more over-the-shoulder.
I'm not sure I understand the "add more variety/sameness part" though, could you please elaborate?[/QUOTE]
I wasn't sure if it was a statue or character haha, that will come through with colour and shade.
Well right now all your panels are almost the exact same height and width with little variety, with the exception of the 3rd row.
There is two ways comics go, either with dynamic variable panels or all the same sized panels. Your at an odd in between stage which feels awkward to look at as a whole. See how it looks once you've fixed up the paneling for the close-up shots. That may fix it a fair bit on its own
[QUOTE=Biscuit-Boy;44737806]
Oh and did you seriously name him 'Hiro' and have him state, verbally or otherwise, that he wants "to be a hero"?? Not only that but as the only sentence of your second paragraph?! That's simply unacceptable. What's your intended audience, third graders?
[/QUOTE]
Not sure if it's a reference, but the main character in the popular sci-fi novel Snow Crash by Neal Stephenson is named "Hiro Protagonist". Either way, it's still probably not a good idea to go with the name Hiro.
[url]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Snow_Crash[/url]
[IMG]http://i.imgur.com/nEY5fs1.gif[/IMG]
A crazy rocket launcher for my [URL=http://i.imgur.com/3x6QulF.gif]crazy protagonist (shown holding a beta version)[/URL], "Smiley" is a ramshackle contraption with terrible accuracy (no scope or sights, only one handle). She stores it in a holster on her back.
As usual, feedback is lovely!
Again the style makes every look very dirty and smudgy
Rather than drawing on paper and scanning it then cutting it out of the image, why not do the whole thing digital? The jagged edges look terrible
Personally I don't think pencil scans and flat colours mix well, you can get away with a sepia tone or something (or just let the linework speak for itself on a textured bg) but the way you're doing it is an uncomfortable compromise, you have the worst of both worlds really.
Also for the crosshatching, make diamonds, not squares.
I.E [img]http://i.gyazo.com/a80c586e3d6a9440f710ba0bb3b7b40a.png[/img] this looks alright
[img]http://i.gyazo.com/cb52a31d664ad03b36f2f9a580e0d2f8.png[/img] this is netted, it looks bad (and remains flat)
in good company
[img]https://31.media.tumblr.com/92ff7aeddbfd13127611be244ef9e2dd/tumblr_n569a4q7Gq1qd5eico1_500.jpg[/img]
[QUOTE=Biscuit-Boy;44737806]Well, since you asked-
Yeah, I'm sorry, it's not very good. The narrative style is very course. "But obsessed with what?" is a good example of a question that your audience doesn't need to be told to ask. You need to lead them to that question instead of just saying it out loud. Your first sentence is the most important, but it's in a hell of a state currently. You need to be more methodical, and carefully consider whether you want the very first foot out of the gate to be mumbling about some sort of non-sun light source aimed at 'rubble' that's awkwardly related to a bridge.
There's nothing wrong with introducing your character by their first name the first time they're mentioned. I appreciate the effort of us reading a nametag, but it's ham-fisted and comes off more offensive to the reader than anything. Again, consider that you're three sentences in and we're reading a name tag off of the clothing of the person wearing it.
"His helmet with a" should read "His helmet, with" But you need to re-arrange the sentence and the order of "The matte white visor of his helmet obscures his face" because the subject is the visor and it's modifying, obscuring, his face.
Oh and did you seriously name him 'Hiro' and have him state, verbally or otherwise, that he wants "to be a hero"?? Not only that but as the only sentence of your second paragraph?! That's simply unacceptable. What's your intended audience, third graders?
I get that you're trying to paint this dramatic picture of him struggling to recover from being placed in a mysterious bridge-rubble incident, but it's clumsy as ever. You've made the effort to describe the symptoms of his injuries, an honorable attempt at 'show-don't-tell', it's just awkward. It's hard to put my finger on anything specifically other than saying scrap it all, but a solid example is 'a trail of blood originating from him'. Originating? How? Through osmosis? From his handy-dandy blood dispenser? You can choose either to name an injury or to leave this detail to our imagination, but you can't just say 'blood appears somehow' and call it a day.
'The ground takes Hiro' is an ambitious attempt at a sentence, but it could do better if it actually made sense. Does it mean he's fallen over? Or the ground has literally turned into a sentient concrete-bridge-rubble-creature and scooped him up?
So anyways, you've got to focus on what's actually happening first. Right now a guy gets up from a pile of stuff, makes a god-awful pun, and then collapses again. Consider rewriting your intro so that we actually have a reason to give a shit and work from there. If I were in your shoes I might try to find a different moment to start your story from, so we can get a sense of who this character actually is, rather than just knowing that they have a strange bird helmet and a nametag.[/QUOTE]
thank you
[QUOTE=Fire Kracker;44735421][URL]https://www.dropbox.com/s/rxfg7lbah6qct8w/wip.docx[/URL]
I wanted to write a story but then I don't think I'm very good at writing so I am looking for someone to tear me up :S
it's not done either but i wanted to share before i got too far[/QUOTE]
Here's another one to add to biscuitboy's...
In the first paragraph, there just seems to be some awkward sentence structure.
ie: "Hiro sits up, pushing himself up with his right arm and in his mind a single thought holds stead, giving him determination despite the excruciating pain his body was experiencing."
This specific sentence is also a bit too long for comfort.
"His body was experiencing" is unnecessary. We know that he's enduring pain already before you say that.
Biscuit's covered the name already, but apart from the pun, i can excuse that. I've come up with some pretty god-awful names before revising myself, and I'm not that surprised that many other budding authors do it too.
About the first spoken sentence...
"The mark of the immature man is that he wants to die nobly for a cause, while the mark of the mature man is that he wants to live humbly for one." - The Catcher in the Rye
There's also something really bizarre about the first spoken sentence. I can't exactly put my finger on it, though. He's alone, presumably bleeding, and his possible last thought is to be a hero?
What exactly is going on? At this point, I still have no idea what the genre is, and this only leaves me with more confusion. Perhaps it'll get clearer later in the novel, but at the beginning, you should avoid all confusion as possible.
"His breathing rapidly accelerates as he glances back." No need for a comma, whereas...
"His helmet, as white as Hiro's own, shines in the sunlight." I'd prefer the commas here to clarify the sentence.
Biscuit has already covered "The ground takes Hiro."
Okay. Second Paragraph.
"His helmet, as white as Hiro's own, [U]shines[/U] in the sunlight." Then, later...
"He [U]swung[/U] his curved blade towards the hill int he distance. He [U]pushed[/U] everyone, like a man obsessed."
You just switched tenses from present to past. In the third paragraph, you switch back to present. Never do that. A work is always written in only one tense, never in two. Just keep this in mind.
Biscuit has already covered "but obsessed with what?"... (lol)
Are the dotted lines supposed to indicate chapter breaks? It'd somewhat make sense to end chapters with single sentence paragraphs (ie: Below, I heard Peeta's voice. (This is from the Hunger Games. I don't remember the exact sentence, but that suffices as a chapter-ending sentence, because it is a big plot twist)). However, you should avoid overuse of this. Some chapters just need to end without the 'bang' of a single sentence paragraph. If you overuse it, it loses its effectiveness.
I'm getting a feel of anachronism. Until the start of the second page, the only objects that give us a bearing of time are his parka, a helmet, and a curved blade.
It doesn't quite make sense to me. The only helmet that he would be wearing that obscures his face and works in a time era of using a curved blade would be a medieval-esque metal helmet like a sallet or armet.
But he's wearing an orange parka? If he's wearing a helmet, why isn't he wearing any other armor either? The color orange is associated with safety so other people can see the person and rescue them in emergencies, but that didn't really come into effect until the mid-late 20th century.
Perhaps the sword is more of an ornamentation for extra effect. If we assume this, I'm getting an impression that Hiro is more of an engineer wearing a safety helmet, though a beaked visor...?
It's not making much sense to me. At the top of the second page, it seems to me like either humanity has gotten the technology to go into space and colonize a second world, but that is not possible without contacting each other. So humanity has found an alternate world using some sort of stable portals that allow them to access it without the use of space-tech. Judging by the inclusion of 'guilds', it seems that this is near a medieval time.
Reading on.
"You have a very handsome face; a young man like you should take care of it." The old woman says, ...
There's just something off with the syntax. You probably wouldn't start a sentence with "The old woman says, complimenting Hiro...". It just feels off to me.
"Having his helmet on most of the time he hadn't noticed that it was off, his hands immediately went up to try to feel his helm."
There's some redundancy that you can cut down, and you can add a few commas to clarify.
Then, character description.
"... still inside of their packaging." What time is it exactly...?
So... two and a half pages later and i'm still utterly lost at the time setting.
Hiro, so far, is an almost completely-blank character. I know nothing of his personality, or his character, other than that he's an explorer who almost died, what his face looks like, and he wears a helmet everywhere.
The grandmother and the girl have distinct personalities.
So I'd definitely start on cutting down the anachronism.
There isn't much I can say with only this much text and no idea of plot or genre.
Write more. You can sparkle up your writing in later revisions. Your first draft is just getting the ideas down.
(If you haven't, go take a look at the critique that I wrote on inebriaticxp's work. There's stuff on plot, magic if you're going to have it (Healer, to me, evokes a slight suspicion in me), and mary sues.)
Ah man that was a good read.
ONLY ONE SHAPE CAN BE
[img_thumb]https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/65357207/deadliestshape.png[/img_thumb]
THE DEADLIEST
amusing concept but why do they look so bored?
[QUOTE=Gunsmith;44746192]amusing concept but why do they look so bored?[/QUOTE]
Bored? I see faces of longing and lust.
They just want to get the fight over with so they can get to it.
[IMG]https://scontent-a-iad.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn2/t1.0-9/10254999_648685505185950_6022412799912694910_n.jpg[/IMG]
selling my soul for a $40 hoodie design
ignore the water mark
[IMG]http://i.imgur.com/MWcfGED.jpg[/IMG]
Edited Selfie
...Disagree? I'm quite sure that's me. Hm, or what are you disagreeing on? This is really confusing :'( Help.
[IMG]http://i.imgur.com/bzKEeaU.png[/IMG]
The Last of Us: Technicolor Edition
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