Translation:
You pass me in the hall every day as I smell your hair while you aren't looking. I get the urge to hurt you even though I'm a scrawny nerd who would break a knuckle on your chin.
You tell me to stop following you. Maybe I should, but I don't because I can't take a hint and I want to woo you despite your complete disinterest.
I dreamed of you last night. I was murdering you and violating your corpse. I am getting the urge to do just that only for real.
At the prom I will slip a roofie in your drink so I can murder you and violate your corpse.
I hope I can wait a week to murder you and violate your corpse.
I love you, girl who will probably strangle me to death because I am a weak nerd.
[QUOTE=Red Underground;16514397]Does the intention of the artist decide what is art and what isn't? Let me answer myself and say "No it doesn't"
[/QUOTE]
True, but the OP did say to me "What makes this poetry anyways? Seriously" So that'd be in his words, no.
-snip-
[QUOTE=Lankist;16514364]I mean look at his diction. Crimson Lifeforce? Really. Just call it blood, pal. We don't need the half-assed symbolism if you can't think of anything better than that.[/QUOTE]
Writers are always verbally masterbating with their imagery and figurative language. It's just fucking annoying sometimes!
[QUOTE=jjsullivan;16514414]True, but the OP did say to me "What makes this poetry anyways? Seriously" So that'd be in his words, no.[/QUOTE]
The greatest discoveries are often overlooked by their creators, such is the way with art.
[QUOTE=Red Underground;16514433]The greatest discoveries are often overlooked by their creators, such is the way with art.[/QUOTE]
Well, thats true, but the poem seems a bit...Harsh
[QUOTE=Lankist;16514409]Translation:
You pass me in the hall every day as I smell your hair while you aren't looking. I get the urge to hurt you even though I'm a scrawny nerd who would break a knuckle on your chin.
You tell me to stop following you. Maybe I should, but I don't because I can't take a hint and I want to woo you despite your complete disinterest.
I dreamed of you last night. I was murdering you and violating your corpse. I am getting the urge to do just that only for real.
At the prom I will slip a roofie in your drink so I can murder you and violate your corpse.
I hope I can wait a week to murder you and violate your corpse.
I love you, girl who will probably strangle me to death because I am a weak nerd.[/QUOTE]
Bahaha there was this guy who sent in a FP confession about being a closet necrophiliac... maybe this is him. :lol::lol:
Nah, I'm kidding but your translation sounds like some freaky serial killer/necrophiliac.
[QUOTE=.Cheezy.;16514429]Writers are always verbally masterbating with their imagery and figurative language. It's just fucking annoying sometimes![/QUOTE]
Good writers know how to strike a balance between symbolic imagery and literal prose.
OP is not a good writer.
(Spoiler: The key is to stop being so self-indulgent and just tell shit like it is once in a while)
[QUOTE=jjsullivan;16514458]Well, thats true, but the poem seems a bit...Harsh[/QUOTE]
A better term for it would be avant-garde.
[QUOTE=.Cheezy.;16514461]Bahaha there was this guy who sent in a FP confession about being a closet necrophiliac... maybe this is him. :lol::lol:
Nah, I'm kidding but your translation sounds like some freaky serial killer/necrophiliac.[/QUOTE]
That is because OP is some freaky serial killer/necrophiliac
[QUOTE=aidinigan;16513595]I see her everyday. Her scent consumes me, this bloodlust wont go away.
She says i follow her around. Maybe i do, i know nothing but her.
I dreamed of her last night. Her crimson lifeforce dripping from my mouth. I cant contol it anymore.
At the prom afterparty ill make my move. Oh boy it will be a sight. Ill mix it with vodka and do shots of her.
I hope i can last the week.
I love you Amber.[/QUOTE]
This is avant-garde? Pfft, please. Sounds like he's some kind of stalker.
[QUOTE=jjsullivan;16514510]This is avant-garde? Pfft, please. Sounds like he's some kind of stalker.[/QUOTE]
And woman's rights just sounded like impertinence.
Sorry I hit her first, she's not that good.
[QUOTE=Red Underground;16514523]And woman's rights just sounded like impertinence.[/QUOTE]
I think that whole post was impertinence
I find it funny the OP hasn't posted since people started flaming and chewing him out
[QUOTE=jjsullivan;16514547]I think that whole post was impertinence[/QUOTE]
and so how is it not avant-garde?
Sounds like some Twilight weirdo to me.
[QUOTE=Red Underground;16514554]and so how is it not avant-garde?[/QUOTE]
It sounds like an expression of a deathwish more than it does love, thats my perception of it.
Once again, art's impact is variable on it's viewer.
You should kill people
[QUOTE=Unreliable;16513851]just the market? i wish i didn't take french.[/QUOTE]
I wish I paid more attention in French...
[editline]04:50AM[/editline]
[QUOTE=Kite_shugo;16514550]I find it funny the OP hasn't posted since people started flaming and chewing him out[/QUOTE]
:emo:
[QUOTE=Lankist;16514487]That is because OP is some freaky serial killer/necrophiliac[/QUOTE]
I kind of think the Op is just a troll. They're just playing a stereotypical goth/emo reject kid that likes poetry and writes about their woes and won't leave a certain obsession alone.
[QUOTE=DualReaver;16513774]i've got 99 problems, but a bitch ain't one[/QUOTE]
maybe thats the real problem, amirite?
[QUOTE=K00n!;16514676]maybe thats the real problem, amirite?[/QUOTE]
There is none :/
[QUOTE=K00n!;16514676]maybe thats the real problem, amirite?[/QUOTE]
Very witty. You should feel good about yourself.
Who the fuck has prom in august?
[QUOTE=b4nny;16514724]Who the fuck has prom in august?[/QUOTE]
He's a very patient stalker. His creepy passion for this girl will fade in time and unless he grows up, it'll be replaced by another.
Drink her fucking blood.
UH
[QUOTE=gnome;16514614]I kind of think the Op is just a troll. They're just playing a stereotypical goth/emo reject kid that likes poetry and writes about their woes and won't leave a certain obsession alone.[/QUOTE]
i dont recall anyone asking you what you kind of think
I just want to have a taste of her blood while having sex to see what it is like. Im becoming obsessed with it and want it really bad.
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