The ability to see loose change on the ground while in an airplane.
Ability to only post on page 3.
The ability to breathe underwater and talk with fish.
The ability to make your farts smell like whatever you were smelling exactly 10 minutes before that fart.
[editline]23rd April 2013[/editline]
[QUOTE=potsale;40396524]The ability to breathe underwater and talk with fish.[/QUOTE]
That sounds useful as fuck.
[QUOTE=MazerRackham;40396338]Super fast aging. Sure you end up with a head like an aliens testicle, but you can buy alcohol by age 5.
[t]http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_z7aFDj6O8yg/S88KV29K8DI/AAAAAAAAAAU/mqg2CG3Ei6k/s1600/progeria.jpg[/t][/QUOTE]
Actually that's a real condition. Sadly, you don't get any of the benefits if being older.
A power where you are attractive to all women, but have permanent erectile dysfunction.
So they end up embedded in you? Of course, that raises the question, do you have the necessary secondary superpower to displace air? A lot of superpowers would be pretty useless without their secondary components.
[editline]23rd April 2013[/editline]
[QUOTE=NateDude;40394739]If a power is extremly niche and will never effect your life a great deal then I would classify it as useless but, technically, they aren't "useless". If we're going into specifics it's not quite possible for a superpower to be useless if it does anything, because surely you'd be able to find SOME use for it regardless. So let's just classify extremely pointless or unoticable powers useless.
On that note, the ability to teleport exactly one inch to my left. But my clothes don't teleport with me.[/QUOTE]
Ability to read how people on facepunch will respond to your post
[QUOTE=WarRocker32;40394671]The ability to teleport, but only when masturbating.[/QUOTE]
So [I]that's[/I] what that south Korean teacher was trying to do!
[QUOTE=Appellation;40396652]So [I]that's[/I] what that south Korean teacher was trying to do![/QUOTE]
News Humour
[QUOTE=flyboy463;40396606]A power where you are attractive to all women, but have permanent erectile dysfunction.[/QUOTE]
Would they still be attracted to you when they find out your dick doesn't work? Because in that case, just be a functional lesbian (that lacks tits and a vagina)
[QUOTE=Dukov Traboski;40394696]These arn't really useless, rather then inconvenient.[/QUOTE]
You're right.
The ability to buzzkill is quite a useless power.
The ability to live on the sun, but you can only see in the dark
the ability to instantly drop any electronics worth more than $200
The ability to make an exact copy of any small item you are touching, but the original instantly vanishes.
The ability to steal other people's superpowers (while no one else has superpowers)
the ability to hover 0.001 cm from the ground
The ability to make your food go invisible
the only catch is that it works only in Ethiopia
[QUOTE=Talatandi;40393540]Ability to become a peanut.[/QUOTE]
Ability to listen to a peanuts thoughts.
The ability to resurrect Hitler, and everyone will instantly know it was you who brought him back.
The ability to read things in an awesome narrator voice, but only shit like [url=http://www.newgrounds.com/audio/listen/532267]this[/url].
The ability to bleed peanut butter.
The ability to turn [img]http://www.facepunch.com/fp/ratings/heart.png[/img] into [img]http://www.facepunch.com/fp/ratings/rainbow.png[/img]
The ability to shift your bones into identical bones.
The ability to communicate with a bottle of whisky.
The ability to believe everything fox news says while being a rational person
[QUOTE=Bloodshot12;40397577]The ability to believe everything fox news says while being a rational person[/QUOTE]
That's more of a curse than it is a superpower.
The ability to shit out of your mouth
"Lactose-Intolerance Man!"
The ability to grow molasses.
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