• Facepunch Medical Thread V1 (I don't need a doctor it's not that bad)
    2,432 replies, posted
[QUOTE=DilemmaMan;31468065]A bird shit in my mouth yesterday. What do I do?[/QUOTE] amputate it.
[QUOTE=BrQ;31467963]haven't put on headphones in ages[/QUOTE] Then it might be earwax or blood that is pumping.
[QUOTE=DilemmaMan;31468065]A bird shit in my mouth yesterday. What do I do?[/QUOTE] Swallow it... Then amputate.
When I touch the tip of my dick my asshole clenches wtf
[QUOTE=Mind Man;31538459]When I touch the tip of my dick my asshole clenches wtf[/QUOTE] So does mine whenever something makes me really uncomfortable.
i am a facepuncher help
[QUOTE=Mind Man;31538459]When I touch the tip of my dick my asshole clenches wtf[/QUOTE] just a reflex, some people have that. when I touch just behind my left ear, it makes me blink, some people have odd reflex reactions
[QUOTE=Mind Man;31538459]When I touch the tip of my dick my asshole clenches wtf[/QUOTE] this means you are gay
[QUOTE=Epic Lul;31541584]this means you are gay[/QUOTE] trust this guy, he has had much experience with homosexuality influenced penis reflexes.
Sore throat. Every damn summer, every time I swallow food it feels like a fucking shot of moonshine.
Guys I put celery in my butt and when I pulled it out there was blood on it I lubed up with water beforehand but now it hurts and blood is seeping from my sphincter [editline]5th August 2011[/editline] help me
Got a new monitor, 1920 x 1080 res up from like 12xx x 7xx on the old one. Getting headaches from using it, will my eyes eventually get used to it and stop causing headaches?
[QUOTE=CabooseRvB;31541903]Sore throat. Every damn summer, every time I swallow food it feels like a fucking shot of moonshine.[/QUOTE] Epstein-Barr Virus? It has latent periods and then it flares up with a wicked sore throat, among other flu/cold-like symptoms. [editline]4th August 2011[/editline] [QUOTE=Tacosheller;31542072]Guys I put celery in my butt and when I pulled it out there was blood on it I lubed up with water beforehand but now it hurts and blood is seeping from my sphincter [editline]5th August 2011[/editline] help me[/QUOTE] Shove a tampon in your anus until the bleeding stops.
[QUOTE=Angry Pineapple;31542122]Got a new monitor, 1920 x 1080 res up from like 12xx x 7xx on the old one. Getting headaches from using it, will my eyes eventually get used to it and stop causing headaches?[/QUOTE] could be due to any number of factors, such as your distance from the monitor, and the lighting around you. also is it one of those 3d ready monitors? cause those have aa tendency to cause headaches.
[QUOTE=xgman236x;31542560]could be due to any number of factors, such as your distance from the monitor, and the lighting around you. also is it one of those 3d ready monitors? cause those have aa tendency to cause headaches.[/QUOTE] I'm the same distance, same lighting too as I'm in the same room. I turned down the brightness on this monitor to try and help. Here's the monitor [url]http://www.newegg.com/Product/Product.aspx?Item=N82E16824009261&Tpk=Acer%20S211HLbd%2021.5%27%27%205ms%20LED-Backlight%20LCD%20Monitor[/url]
[QUOTE=Shoupie;31542473]Epstein-Barr Virus? It has latent periods and then it flares up with a wicked sore throat, among other flu/cold-like symptoms.[/QUOTE] You saying I have herpes?
After accidentally elbowing the right side of my right knee (about an inch or 2 above the knee cap) a strange bump appeared. This bump pops in and out depending on the position of my leg. ( straight = out, bent = in ). I can also push this bump in a little bit. The bump is not soft. Any ideas?
[QUOTE=doeds;31542882]After accidentally elbowing the right side of my right knee (about an inch or 2 above the knee cap) a strange bump appeared. This bump pops in and out depending on the position of my leg. ( straight = out, bent = in ). I can also push this bump in a little bit. The bump is not soft. Any ideas?[/QUOTE] Only thing near the surface at a couple of inches above the kneecap is muscle and tendon(s), so it could just be a bruise (on the muscle?). Just guessing :v: The reason I think it's the muscle is because that muscle contracts when you straight your leg so it pushes outwards a bit, and vice-versa like you described.
[QUOTE=Chekko;31435153]How do I cure mantits Serious question btw[/QUOTE] Get on a treadmill
[QUOTE=Chris220;31546762]Only thing near the surface at a couple of inches above the kneecap is muscle and tendon(s), so it could just be a bruise (on the muscle?). Just guessing :v: The reason I think it's the muscle is because that muscle contracts when you straight your leg so it pushes outwards a bit, and vice-versa like you described.[/QUOTE] Just so you know, this has been a problem since Christmas Eve. The pain went away in about a week or two. I thought it would just go away with time and rest, clearly I was wrong. My mother actually suggested that I managed to stretch a tendon over top of something.
I am a [i]real[/i] doctor. trust me, I know what im talking about it.
[QUOTE=CabooseRvB;31542830]You saying I have herpes?[/QUOTE] A form of it, yes. It's really easy to catch from other people and it's pretty common. It could be a number of other things, though.
[QUOTE=frankie penis;31433089]i have costochondritis, hurts like a bitch sometimes. it also worries me sometimes as it mimics the pain effects of a heart attack. [url]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Costochondritis[/url] ie. one minute i'll happily be sitting on my pc, next i'll be in agony thinking i'm having a heart attack. i've had to go to the emergency docs twice about it now :v:[/QUOTE] Strange, i've had something like that happen before, i would be sitting there, and my chest would hurt and it would radiate along my left arm and my jaw. It would be agonizing, but if i ate something, it would cause it to go away. I'm thinking it's severe heartburn because it would go away if i ate or drank something.
I have kidney stones, are they going to leave through my ass or dick?
[QUOTE=Sir Spicy Buns;31553654]I have kidney stones, are they going to leave through my ass or dick?[/QUOTE] Through your dick. Have fun with that.
[QUOTE=Sir Spicy Buns;31553654]I have kidney stones, are they going to leave through my ass or dick?[/QUOTE] You're fucked. Its going to be bad.
I amputated every limb I have, and my nose is itchy. What do
[QUOTE=Zakkin;31555312]I amputated every limb I have, and my nose is itchy. What do[/QUOTE] Take it off, along with your tongue.
Fuck
Sometimes when I sprint, I get a really bad pain beside my lower abs. Feels like an organ is crying or some sad stuff. I'm not exhausted and I know I can run more, but the pain gets so bad I can't continue. Anyone know what's up?
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