• A serial killer is in your house, what do you do?
    213 replies, posted
Camp next to my door, and when it opens.... BACKSTAB WITH A KNIFE D:<
Grab a phone,GTFO,call 911 from about a kilometer away.
Get a weapon.
i'd ask him why he kills cereal
I'd make a joke about cereal and serial then probably get stabbed.
[QUOTE=Angooose;23942829]I'd make a joke about cereal and serial then probably get stabbed.[/QUOTE] [QUOTE=The Spie;23942820]i'd ask him why he kills cereal[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=ExplodingGuy;23368410]I have an AR-15 for a reason...[/QUOTE] like this one? [img]http://secretsocietynyc.files.wordpress.com/2008/01/hello-kitty-ar-15-rifle-1.jpg[/img]
Grab my shotgun and plant his ass on the ground. Then bury his body in my backyard and make a thread about my story on facepunch.
throw water at him maby he will melt or i could barrow explodingguy's gun/\
pour water on myself maby i will get cool relief in the summer Oh, then realize while I'm cooling off some guy is stabbing my parents. I'd prolly go hide.
I'd shoot his eyes out with my brothers gas operated soft air gun :black101: [editline]09:47PM[/editline] And then whoop his ass with my baseball bat
blast my hamster with piss, then throw it at him
Start doing Thriller.
Kitchen knife, 'nuff said.
Put bengay on balls.
Open Facepunch forums and make a thread "A serial killer is in your house, what do you do?" in [I][B]fast threads[/B][/I].
sneak up behind him pull his trousers down chop off his ball sack and make him eat it.
[QUOTE=creec;23944657]Open Facepunch forums and make a thread "A serial killer is in your house, what do you do?" in [I][B]fast threads[/B][/I].[/QUOTE] I now have this mental image of a thread reading "Hey Facepunch, a man in a balaclava broke through my door and is standing in the hall yelling about Satan. What do I do?"
I would grab my handmade wooden samurai sword I have hidden with duct tape under my computer desk and use it as a spear, as it won't do shit. AIM FOR THE EYES! :black101:
I would quickly dress up in my Austin Powers costume and try and get out a quick pun before I died. Maybe even write one on a bit of paper to put in my pocket, maybe get a few laughs from the officer that takes it out my pocket when I'm found dead.
Beat him to death with a box of cereal. Look, as puns go, it wasn't the [i]worst[/i].
Unleash my dog that bites the scrotum of intruders.
Take my phone and climb on the roof.
1) make a thread in general discussion 2) deal with the problem by donning a homemade suit of motocross impact armour and beer boxes then beat him with the metal bar from my home weights set
Lets see... I'd shit my pants first, freeze in terror, lock my door, think "What the fuck do I do?", then Id probably make up some cereal jokes in my head and laugh my ass off. Then I would get back to "scared shitless" mode, grab a phone, bail out the window, run, run some more, call the cops then run some more then probably (knowing me) I'd get tired and just fall down from all the running. By that time I'd probably be a few miles out from the city or in downtown if I went the opposite direction. Yeah im not the bravest fucker around here but Im 16 I cant do shit against a cereal killer. C:
I would grab her and twist her arm, breaking it. I would then tie her up and rape her mercilessly until she cried blood and sperm. Then I would call the cops and get both of us arrested, and rape her in prison again. And then when we grow old and are finally free, I'll rape her with my walking stick.
Bayonet on a drumstick. [img]http://img148.imageshack.us/img148/1006/img7670q.jpg[/img]
[QUOTE=Vollybomb;24191678]Bayonet on a drumstick. [img]http://img148.imageshack.us/img148/1006/img7670q.jpg[/img][/QUOTE] Holy shit. I just thought the same thing right before I saw your post. Except I would get my drumstick, put a large glass bottle on it.
Knock him out with a lamp. Strap him to a chair after taking his shirt off. Create a concoction of Fiber Glass Insulator, Salt, Lemon Juice and Pepper Juice. When he awakes slap him and ask him who sent him. When he responds I'll simply shake my head and wield the Fiber Glass Cutting Thing. Look at the blob, him, the blob, him. Then finally let out a big sigh and ask him once more. He responds. Widen eyes, no regrets, go to town on his chest with that fiber glass blob I made earlier.
Obtain zippo and zippo lighter fluid. combine to make flame thrower.
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