An irresponsible pilot.
What happens when you mix Obama and petrol?
Political Debate Fuel
What do an old person and a bin have in common?
They both have broken shit inside of them.
What do conspiracy theorists and mules have in common?
They're both asses.
A Swebonny walks into an Ikea...
Then she leaves.
A gay guy gets a boner. What is he called?
Rooster waking up the farmer.
[editline]30th November 2012[/editline]
What do you call a man with no penis?
She?
What is 37mm long?
Your penis.
So a crippled man on a wheelchair walks into a bar...
His wheelchair breaks down, and he curses "Cor wheelie!"
So I have a bloody nose...
I think the best solution is stop snorting so much cocaine.
A cat and dog walk into a bar
and they both ordered a punch to the face.
If a is 10, and b is 7, then b - a means
She's old enough.
A Bartender walks into a bar
He says 'hey this isn't the bar I work in'
I walk into a bar
The bartender says "Is this some kind of joke?!"
A starfish and a clam are sitting in a bus stop and the clam turns to the starfish and says, "Hey, don't you guys normally eat clams?". The starfish then replies
Depends on how much of a pearl digger it is
A samurai, a knight and a US Marine enter a fighting tournament.
The samurai pulls out his katana, moving towards the marine. The knight pulls out a mace and begins his move towards the marine. The marine sits and laughs about how he'll make a fortune with the video of the knight and samurai fighting.
What's red and green and doesn't understand communism?
Mitt Romney's wife on her period.
[editline]1st December 2012[/editline]
What's black with no legs
My sex slave
What does a tractor and a giraffe have in common?
They have minimal grammatical skills.
The cucumber turned to his doctor and said:
"Do I look like a dick?" The doctor says "yes"
So a man is held up at gunpoint. The robber points a gun to the head. The man said:
"*splattering of brains against wall*"
Why did the duck cross the road?
Because the road was a pond and it was an obstacle
I said:
"If there were two men who sexually assaulted me, I would enjoy it." Two men entered the room at that point.
Why does paint come in many colors?
So it can't be racist.
Why did the bird fly?
To get to the other side.
What do you call a duck with a machine gun?
A taxi, so that he can get home to his wife after serving in the military.
What do you call a book made out of bananas?
Why did the black man didn't want to shoot the watermelon?
What do you call a book made out of bananas?
Yellow Journalism
What did the bar tender say to the doctor?
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