I masturbated for the first time ever, and I'm having some problems...
130 replies, posted
[QUOTE=cqbcat;25886198]I wasn't ninja'd. I know there's a difference. It just makes me feel bad cause I'm a loser who just sits in front of the computer fapping to porn. But there's nothing deeper than that. It's just lust and it's not satisfying.[/QUOTE]
I got ninja'd by Agoat.
Hey, sometimes, you get bored of sex, and just need some alone time. It's perfectly normal.
Just find a girl you like, ask her out, and then boom. Sex will come with the territory. Or, if you have a real good friend who you aren't interested in dating, fuck buddy.
Stop ninja'ing me Agoat :ninja:
dude stop fapping so much. youre brusiing ur shit
[QUOTE=Elizer;25886242]I got ninja'd by Agoat.
Hey, sometimes, you get bored of sex, and just need some alone time. It's perfectly normal.
Just find a girl you like, ask her out, and then boom. Sex will come with the territory. Or, if you have a real good friend who you aren't interested in dating, fuck buddy.
Stop ninja'ing me Agoat :ninja:[/QUOTE]
Don't start with a fuck buddy. Start with real relationships (as real as it gets at whatever the fuck age). Make your first time special, otherwise you'll fall in love with someone who sees you as a dick with legs, and that's never good.
I thought for sure this was a troll thread until I realized it was posted by ROFLBURGER. (You changed your avatar, it threw me off.)
you're going to die
[QUOTE=cqbcat;25886139]I feel kind of bad when I fap because I know I will never really make intimate love to a girl friend[/QUOTE]
i feel bad for bursting into laughter upon reading this
Reminds me of when I got a zit on my dick.
alright. from what i see, you:
1. used soap as a lubricant. soap can cause irritation and inflammation.
2. fapped more then twice a day for a couple days. give your dick some rest, or just do it once on weekends.
3. made god cry. but who doesn't nowadays.
[QUOTE=Agoat;25886265]Don't start with a fuck buddy. Start with real relationships (as real as it gets at whatever the fuck age). Make your first time special, otherwise you'll fall in love with someone who sees you as a dick with legs, and that's never good.[/QUOTE]
Everyone should know that that's the chain of relationships.
Fuck buddies should be treated as a change in a routine that works. Sometimes it's just needed to keep from being bored, but shouldn't be kept as part of the routine.
Really horrible comparison :/
I was like troll thread, Then I read soap; That shits gunna burn your dick bro.
I'm intrigued.
[QUOTE=Dragon Master;25886075]If your not a troll, you must be really stupid (no offence)...
Why would a person admit to all this stuff on a website renowned for having no simpathy. I think you would more likely talk to a doctor than post the schedule and occurances of such things, due to having [B]"dignity"[/B]. I call trolling![/QUOTE]
Would you rather post about your issue on a website with your anonymity retained or would you rather, face-to-face, tell your doctor "My cock has a bump on it and it's all red and shit, I think I masturbated too much, but it felt so good so I couldn't help myself."
[QUOTE=Elizer;25886322]Everyone should know that that's the chain of relationships.
Fuck buddies should be treated as a change in a routine that works. Sometimes it's just needed to keep from being bored, but shouldn't be kept as part of the routine.
Really horrible comparison :/[/QUOTE]
fuck buddies with an ex is always a really terrible idea that makes for great sex
[QUOTE=Sharkcheater;25886347]I was like troll thread, Then I read soap; That shits gunna burn your dick bro.[/QUOTE]
It's starting to itch.
Why the fuck am I so selfish/greedy
You managed to fuck up your penis within your first days of fapping
[img]http://i37.tinypic.com/vgnbc8.png[/img]
[QUOTE=Kung Fu Jew;25886352]Would you rather post about your issue on a website with your anonymity retained or would you rather, face-to-face, tell your doctor "My cock has a bump on it and it's all red and shit, I think I masturbated too much, but it felt so good so I couldn't help myself."[/QUOTE]
you wouldnt do either you'd browse medical sites not a gmod websites general discussion
[QUOTE=ROFLBURGER;25886357]Why the fuck am I so selfish/greedy[/QUOTE]
Relax, we all fuck up sometimes. You'll be alright.
[QUOTE=reltih floda;25886363]you wouldnt do either you'd browse medical sites not a gmod websites general discussion[/QUOTE]
Yes I shall go to 4chan!
No.
Also, I don't like my doctor, I think he's a pedo and he smells like regret.
[QUOTE=reltih floda;25886363]you wouldnt do either you'd browse medical sites not a gmod websites general discussion[/QUOTE]
Sure I would (in fact it's what I always do if I have any issues, since they recommend doctors if the problem's serious), but this guy's saying you somehow retain more dignity by telling a person, to their face, that you screwed up your penis by masturbating uncontrollably than posting about it on an internet forum.
[QUOTE=reltih floda;25886355]fuck buddies with an ex is always a really terrible idea that makes for great sex[/QUOTE]
It's horrible yet so true
[QUOTE=ROFLBURGER;25886375]Yes I shall go to 4chan!
No.
Also, I don't like my doctor, I think he's a pedo and he smells like regret.[/QUOTE]
4chan is [I]not[/I] a medical site. If you've ever taken a health tip from there, perhaps excluding /fit/, then God save your poor, gullible soul.
[QUOTE=ROFLBURGER;25886357]It's starting to itch.
Why the fuck am I so selfish/greedy[/QUOTE]
It's a'ight mate. All about moderation. Read that thread that says you should masturbate like, 1 time a week. On Fridays.
just fucking dont touch your dick for a while
and dont use soap, body wash etc cuz that shit will burn your dick
dont fap more than 3 times a day
fucin
If you dont wash your dick off after using soap soon enough, its going to be VERY painful every time the skin stretches, even the slightest. I had my own similar experience... I think pubic hairs contribute to the problem.
Rub bengay on it, it releases the blood which stops it from aching.
damnit, ROFLBURGER.
You have never. NEVER. Made anything close to a serious thread. EVER.
If you are serious, then Im sorry, but you have severe penile cancer.
Also, Icy Hot will relieve the pain greatly.
PROTIP: only use shampoo or body wash if you are in the shower. And dont fap with dried auto paint on your hands. Been there, done that. Had to wrap my dick in toilet paper for three straight days. I could barley walk.
Roflburger you are a troll. You told stories about how you were like 20 something and your neice was a pottymouth 6 year old who plays COD then you admitted that all your stories were just trolling and you were 13 years old, but you still continue to post stories.
[editline]6th November 2010[/editline]
[QUOTE=_Chewgum;25886491]just fucking dont touch your dick for a while
and dont use soap, body wash etc cuz that shit will burn your dick
dont fap more than 3 times a day
fucin[/QUOTE]
Body wash is fine.
Why the shit would you use soap, and you're talking like you have your foreskin? Then you don't need lube.
[QUOTE=Crimor;25886947]Why the shit would you use soap, and you're talking like you have your foreskin? Then you don't need lube.[/QUOTE]
Oh.
Well I am a beginner at this, and I wondered why I needed lube when my skin does the work...
[QUOTE=ROFLBURGER;25885984]
My fapping speed is about 200 faps per minute[/QUOTE]
200 / 60 = 3.333*
Either my math is wrong or your penis is small.
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