I remember when I thought my friend's project was coming out of the printer and as a joke I told him it was a piece of shit compared to mine.
Then a random girl standing right next to me took the paper and walked away with a frown on her face.
I wanted to apologize, but she sped walked when I got close. :saddowns:
"Where the fuck's my phone?"
Take it out of pocket and call self.
I dragged my matress into the hamper instead of my sheets.
Was about to put some trash in the toilet and piss in the garbage can next to it
Also, confusing east with west and vise versa
I pissed in the washing basket while sleeping.
I tend to hold my pencil in my in between my lips I'm either very bored or have to use my hands for something else, like folding paper.
This was one of those situations. I then forgot it was there, turned to a friend, and said, "Did you see what I did with my pencil?", as it fell out of my mouth.
He looked at me, then the pencil on the ground, and walked away.
Just yesterday night, I put some syrup for sore throat into the bottle cap it came with and continued playing some game, later on I forgot about that and drunk the syrup with a spoon, then I took the fucking bottle cap and put it on the bottle, out of fucking sudden, I feel like the cap was lighter...then the horror hit me. I spewed honey syrup all over my desk.
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
Piss in toilet (standing of course), wipe ass before flush.
dur
Accidentaly scribbling a box in pen around the sentence on the front of my exam that said
"DO NOT MARK THIS PAGE."
Did not notice what i had done till 30 minuits later when someone pointed it out, shocked that i did not notice what it said after i had drawn around it.
Not me, but when my big brother was born my dad asked the nurse where the eggshell was.
I sometimes forget everyday words like milk, airplane and such
bursting out with 10 minutes of pure laughter in economics class for no real reason
In a dream I accidentally touched a pan that had just came out of the oven, so it was hot, well that made me have an irl reflex of me punching myself in the nose hard enough for it to bruise, make my eyes water and temporarily blind me because of the stars in my eyes.
Put lemonade over my coca-pops, then put milk on them. I then proceeded to eat them, after 3 bites i thought "Wait, this doesn't taste right".
One of my earliest memories is brushing my teeth, spitting into the sink then flushing my toothbrush down the toilet, I cried in the bathroom for a bit because I was worried what my Mum would think. When she found out she made me put toothpaste on my finger and brush my teeth with it :saddowns:
[QUOTE=Cyberdan;26427088]The automatic door at a shop was faulty, and didn't stay open even if you were walking through it. I was tired, and didn't notice the door closing. I got trapped in it and was nearly crushed. I felt horrible.[/QUOTE]
Something like that happened to me in India. The doors were automatic. But they did not know if someone was between them. I got stuck and started to swim, suspended in mid air by these doors. I thought it was funny. The conductor didn't...
Was writing an essay on death penalty in school. Was supposed to give examples when it should be used.
And I wrote cannibalism. And my friend next to me was talking about pancakes for some reason, so I wrote: "Cannibalism is not only a crime against the society but also a crime against nature itself. We simply shouldn't eat pancakes."
Forgot to double-check for misspellings and things like that, and I handed it to the teach.
[QUOTE=Fhux;26503882]Not me, but when my big brother was born my dad asked the nurse where the eggshell was.[/QUOTE]
Did the nurse show him the placenta?
Sometimes I get in my car, sit down, and completely forget how to drive
[QUOTE=DragonGenX;26502997]Piss in toilet (standing of course), wipe ass before flush.
dur[/QUOTE]
Do you still drop your trousers and piss then?
Forgot how to do questionmarks....
Oh, I remember my first week of driving.
Sit in car with grandma.
Turn on car.
"Which one is the gas pedal?"
So in my German class, we watch a few funny German commercials each month. One day, my teacher loads up the video and says, "OK class, this one is a little weird." She hits play and it's a Milka ad featuring [url=http://www.freakingnews.com/pictures/25000/Milka-Cow-25254.jpg]this[/url]. I cracked up so hard, but nobody else even giggled. Now everyone in that class thinks I have Aspergers or something :saddowns:
My friend once screamed NO HURRIES while sleeping. There were like 20 people in the room.
I once called my history teacher Führer while we were learning about World War II.
Hate it when your mouth works faster than your mind.
Just now my little brother, lying on the floor like a meter away from me on a mattres sat up and started doing sit-ups, with open eyes. When I asked him what he was doing the fourth time he just said "Stop it," and fell asleep again. If he wasn't already asleep, that is...
I was once eating an omelet. I choked really hard, but I recovered, so I continued eating. Pretty soon I felt a pain in my nose, so I blew it. I pull the tissue away, and [i]there's a piece of omelet in my tissue![/i] I commented to my friends "A piece of omelet just came out my nose!" and they all cracked up. I'm pretty sure they all thought I was weird.
I just left a thread to find another one, just to come back to the same fucking thread.
[img_thumb]http://www.myfacewhen.com/images/23.jpg[/img_thumb]
Derp
[highlight](User was banned for this post ("Spam" - Benji))[/highlight]
Got in the shower, Shampoo'd up my hair, washed myself, dried off...
And forgot to rinse out my hair.
And then proceeded to walk outside to take the Dog for a walk.
[I]Whaat[/I] a Pratt.
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