Asshole neighbour poisoned my cat, need revenge ideas.
180 replies, posted
Calling the cops won't do you any good since you don't have any real evidence other than "He smirked when he saw me". But like most people already said, let it go. It's not worth stooping down to his level. If he's capable of doing this, he's probably also capable of firing back.
Quit hesitating and post his info on 4chan, this motherfucker deserves everything that's about to come to him.
[QUOTE=Slarav;44632795]Blowtorch his ass shut and feed him mexican food.[/QUOTE]
This.
Alright, if you've got serious balls I've got some real shit for you. Depends on how attentive he is to detail.
Save up a lot of money for this. Wait for him to leave one day when you know he'll be gone for a long time. Plant weed somewhere in his yard. And when I say weed I don't mean a baggie, I mean a small plant. Then call the cops and tell them he's growing "something weird" and "sketchy people" have been going to his house recently and you want to make sure your neighborhood is safe. They go to his house, search his backyard, find weed and bam he gets fucking arrested.
Whatever you do, remember to wear rubber gloves first(any glove would do though, as long as it covers your fingertips). No fingerprints=no evidence it was you who have done it.(unless someone has seen you doing whatever you're doing)
So we have:
Put his personal information on 4chan
Go to the police
Give him AIDS
Shove potatoes up his exhaust pipe
Call his wife telling her that the husband has a secret affair
Throw a spear at him!
Does he have a wife and kids? If so find a way to call him out about what he did in front of all of them, it will tarnish their view of him forever.
[sp]legal and efficient[/sp]
I'm sorry, but the idea of revenge just isn't a good idea, plain and simple. If this guy is fucking around with your entire neighborhood's pets, he's probably not far from fucking with the neighborhood humans as well. Just call the police, and don't give him any reason to fire back or to call the cops on [I]you.[/I]
I realize that it's terrible, and I really am sorry, because this guy sounds like a shithead, but it seems like anytime someone's animal dies, everyone on FP loses their fucking mind. Be disdainful, be mad, just don't take your anger out as it's only going to backfire and get you in trouble.
Whey protein.
Mix it with milk or water and it's a delicious post workout drink. Leave it out for too long, however, and it starts to give off the worst fucking stench satan has ever invented.
Hide an open jar of that somewhere near his house, or if you're feeling lucky, bottle it up for a few days and then pour it out around his house. Bonus stench if mixed with milk.
[QUOTE=Buck.;44631624]Plant some Japanese knotweed outside his house. Good luck trying to get rid off it.[/QUOTE]
you evil bastard
Better yet, get some Kudzu. Although if you plant it in your neighbor's lawn, there's a good chance you'll be waking up in it yourself if it's that close :v:
[QUOTE=Strikelol;44634901]I know of a website where you can buy genetically mutated crabs [b](the std not real crabs)[/b][/QUOTE]
stop ruining my dreams
don't listen to the people saying let it go. This person needs to be stopped. I just told my gf your story op and she started crying and feels bad for you and we both want justice. Post his info on /b/ or something, he took something away from you permanantely, let 4chan torture him now.
Egg his car a shitload. Then inject hydrogen peroxide into every vein on his body.
dont call the cops they aint gonna do shit. take matters into your own hand and beat him senseless.
piss on his corpse
4Chan won't help, not your personal army and all.
put sugar in his gas tank and a potato in his tail pipe
MURDER HIS CAR
I'd say gass out some bees and unleash it into his house
[QUOTE=Masterofstars;44637978]4Chan won't help, not your personal army and all.[/QUOTE]
I dunno, with the cat involved some might be moved.
If there's anything he finds joy in, physically or figuratively, burn it to the ground and blow away the ashes.
[sp]I sincerely hope you're a more rational, and possibly more forgiving, man than I.[/sp]
Don't put sugar in his gas tank, sugar wouldn't do shit. Just pour water into the gas tank, gasoline floats on water so water will go into the engine instead of the gasoline.
Curious.. was your cat getting into their yard at all?
[QUOTE=Bradyns;44639602]Curious.. was your cat getting into their yard at all?[/QUOTE]
I'm not quite understanding these posts. No matter how obnoxious your neighbor's cat is, you can't just kill the poor thing. There's no justification for that.
The reasonable thing to do would be to have a chat and politely ask them to keep a closer eye on their cat.
[QUOTE=Katska;44639641]I'm not quite understanding these posts. No matter how obnoxious your neighbor's cat is, you can't just kill the poor thing. There's no justification for that.
The reasonable thing to do would be to have a chat and politely ask them to keep a closer eye on their cat.[/QUOTE]
If it is just trotting through your yard, disturbing your pets, endangering your children (no idea if it has diseases), wrecking your garden and shitting everywhere.. and, you don't know who it belongs to (unless it has a visible collar), short of taking it to a vet to test the microchip, or calling an expensive animal capture service, it may very well be considered a feral cat.
Also, it's not exactly easy to catch a cat; if it enters your yard, it will probably happen at night.. We have cats wake up our dog, causing neighbours to complain about our dog barking.
Stray cats are a nuisance, and cats should be kept indoors for the same reason that people with big dogs should have big fences.
NB: Residents of NSW are allowed to kill feral cats.
Arson the fucker.
Use wooden tooth picks in every key hole you find : his car, his door, his mail box... wooden thing will break into pieces in the key hole, thus making it impossible to insert the key. It's quick, cheap and very effective.
take your cat to his house for a visit, see if he spills the beans that the cat is dead before you tell him
[sp] sorry if this is a real situation, and your cat really died [/sp]
Import MASSIVE fucking hairy spiders and infest his house with them
Bonus points if venomous
[QUOTE=Durrsly;44635874]What the shit.[/QUOTE]
It's just my stock answer for revenge threads. See also: Any thread about roommates stealing food.
I mean, come on. Half of this thread is suggesting HOMICIDE.
God damn it FurrehFaux.
Don't take his shit, use Passive Aggression, [del]Call the Cops[/del] or hell, Confront him.
PM me his address and shit, include a pic of your cat if possible, I'll write a post and put it on /b/.
You know, after you get unbanned.
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