• Chavs: A Helpful Guide
    300 replies, posted
[QUOTE=kebab52;31715674]Buckfast. Seriously, they live off it. Don't know about chavs but neds do anyway.[/QUOTE] you only get buckfast in scotland i think. the chavs in englands are all about the white lightning.
Never even heard of a chav
mans spittin bars in my town: [media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wm2aQG84m88[/media] [media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4z9k-dyeRJE[/media]
Chav culture is a sub culture of the black "gangsta" culture. It's a heavily influenced spin off.
I'm glad we don't have chavs here. They seem huge cunts.
Chav breeding grounds are the Mac Donald's toilets. I shit you not.
I feel there should be an entry in this thread relating to the recent riots in the UK and the propogation of senseless violence and property damage by chavs, scallys and yobs alike. Chav Movies [b]This is England[/b] [i]Dir: Shane Meadows [/i] [Img]http://www.battleshippretension.com/attachments/Image/this_is_england_ver5.jpg[/Img] A favourite of chavs and scallys who see the racist narrative content akin to their own xenophobic and racist worldviews, oblivious the whole time to the anti-racist theme that runs throughout the film. [b]The Football Factory[/b] [img]http://www.movieposterdb.com/posters/06_02/2004/0385705/l_92005_0385705_3663e5ce.jpg[/img] [i]Dir: Nick Love [/i] Football factory is centered around the Headhunters, an English football hooligan squad who avidly support Chelsea. A favourite flick among the chav hordes owing to the violent content of the film, football and of course, Danny Dyer running through the streets naked, the first occasion of sexual arousal in most chav youths. The main reason for adoration of this film by yobs is their ability to vicariously experience the world of football hooliganism, something which few chavs cannot amount to in real life due to their propensity to prey on weaker elements of society such as older people and children and the fact that the cost of Chelsea season ticket costs far more than their bi-weekly dole payouts. [b]Anuva Hood[/b] [img]http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-ACT0elOAqlA/ThIKjSEHE2I/AAAAAAAAAPI/kJqqUOmryNg/s1600/AnuvaHood.jpg[/img] [i]Dir: Adam Deacon, Daniel Toland [/i] Anuva hood appeals to the "Downtrodden urban youth" on a level that few other films can. After Kidulthood gained widespread critical acclaim and become a favourite flick of scallys, a sudden phenomena has spawned wherein most young English people believe that they are black and hail from East London. This is apparent in the absorption of bastardised Jamaican sayings and slang into the yobs limited vocabulary. This film follows suit in perpetuating the phenomena now refferred to as "The reverse Michael Jackson" in which lower class youths spontanesouly turn from white to black. They begin to take on strange patterns of speech in which their slang replicates that of Jamaican rude boys with sayings such as "Oi my size" "piff" "pukka" "bad man " and the ever popular "wasteman". Their clothing changes from the traditional chav wear to loose fitting baggy pants that fall halfway downto their knees and their taste in music evolves to gaudy dance music to grime music and hip hop. Disclaimer: The content of this post is purely satirical (for the most part) and does not reflect the views of the author owing to a fear of having eggs chucked at his windows by pre pubescent, white lightning drinking foetal alcohol sydrome affected scallys.
[QUOTE=Uberlad;31728600]I feel there should be an entry in this thread relating to the recent riots in the UK and the propogation of senseless violence and property damage by chavs, scallys and yobs alike. Chav Movies [b]This is England[/b] [i]Dir: Shane Meadows [/i] [Img]http://www.battleshippretension.com/attachments/Image/this_is_england_ver5.jpg[/Img] A favourite of chavs and scallys who see the racist narrative content akin to their own xenophobic and racist worldviews, oblivious the whole time to the anti-racist theme that runs throughout the film. [/QUOTE] you are thick [editline]14th August 2011[/editline] die
Urlas in Latvia are worse. Much worse. They're russian, so they don't even know the national language, and they don't ask people to buy stuff for them. They rush on you once they see you, steal everything, spit and piss on you and then go back eating sunflower seeds and drinking cheap beer.
[QUOTE=DisasterWolf;31718251][media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fou_6KG6ihM[/media] [editline]14th August 2011[/editline] Not all neds/chavs hate long hair. Either that or there's a new generation evolving. Shit.[/QUOTE] Hahahaha! Those are your 'feared' chavs? Those are a bunch of long haired kids. We have people that hate these chavs with long hair. They're called forsai (forces). Tracksuit wearing, pumped, skinheads.
We have them too, we call them "gypsies".
fucking hate gypsies more than anything
[QUOTE=Uberlad;31728600]I feel there should be an entry in this thread relating to the recent riots in the UK and the propogation of senseless violence and property damage by chavs, scallys and yobs alike. Chav Movies [b]This is England[/b] [i]Dir: Shane Meadows [/i] [Img]http://www.battleshippretension.com/attachments/Image/this_is_england_ver5.jpg[/Img] A favourite of chavs and scallys who see the racist narrative content akin to their own xenophobic and racist worldviews, oblivious the whole time to the anti-racist theme that runs throughout the film. [b]The Football Factory[/b] [img]http://www.movieposterdb.com/posters/06_02/2004/0385705/l_92005_0385705_3663e5ce.jpg[/img] [i]Dir: Nick Love [/i] Football factory is centered around the Headhunters, an English football hooligan squad who avidly support Chelsea. A favourite flick among the chav hordes owing to the violent content of the film, football and of course, Danny Dyer running through the streets naked, the first occasion of sexual arousal in most chav youths. The main reason for adoration of this film by yobs is their ability to vicariously experience the world of football hooliganism, something which few chavs cannot amount to in real life due to their propensity to prey on weaker elements of society such as older people and children and the fact that the cost of Chelsea season ticket costs far more than their bi-weekly dole payouts. [b]Anuva Hood[/b] [img]http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-ACT0elOAqlA/ThIKjSEHE2I/AAAAAAAAAPI/kJqqUOmryNg/s1600/AnuvaHood.jpg[/img] [i]Dir: Adam Deacon, Daniel Toland [/i] Anuva hood appeals to the "Downtrodden urban youth" on a level that few other films can. After Kidulthood gained widespread critical acclaim and become a favourite flick of scallys, a sudden phenomena has spawned wherein most young English people believe that they are black and hail from East London. This is apparent in the absorption of bastardised Jamaican sayings and slang into the yobs limited vocabulary. This film follows suit in perpetuating the phenomena now refferred to as "The reverse Michael Jackson" in which lower class youths spontanesouly turn from white to black. They begin to take on strange patterns of speech in which their slang replicates that of Jamaican rude boys with sayings such as "Oi my size" "piff" "pukka" "bad man " and the ever popular "wasteman". Their clothing changes from the traditional chav wear to loose fitting baggy pants that fall halfway downto their knees and their taste in music evolves to gaudy dance music to grime music and hip hop. Disclaimer: The content of this post is purely satirical (for the most part) and does not reflect the views of the author owing to a fear of having eggs chucked at his windows by pre pubescent, white lightning drinking foetal alcohol sydrome affected scallys.[/QUOTE] 1. This is England is a film based around skinhead culture, it's content has nothing to do with chavs 2. Anuvahood is a comedic approach to the whole situation, it's actually mocking it more than perpetuating it.
[QUOTE=float;31723295]you only get buckfast in scotland i think. the chavs in englands are all about the white lightning.[/QUOTE] White lightning isn't sold anymore. Scrumpy jack or other dry ciders are the alternatives.
[QUOTE=Coon;31729145]White lightning isn't sold anymore. Scrumpy jack or other dry ciders are the alternatives.[/QUOTE] in my local shop we have something called white star which is essentially the same. [editline]14th August 2011[/editline] comes in a big plastic bottle. Classy.
[QUOTE=daumantas100;31728838]Hahahaha! Those are your 'feared' chavs? Those are a bunch of long haired kids. We have people that hate these chavs with long hair. They're called forsai (forces). Tracksuit wearing, pumped, skinheads.[/QUOTE] No one fears Chavs.
in our country we have dumb 2 metre long body building nazis that beat up everything that isn't considered nazist or, they tend to beat up people in the more shitty part of the town and only at night and only if there are more of them than the victim/victims but some of them are okay and I am friends with many so I don't feel that bad when going home drunk at midnight
I like Lacoste trainers and Lynx Africa, am I a chav? :(
American Chav? I don't even think there are such things
I'm happy that the closest things to Chavs in the Northeastern U.S. where I live is the "douche". There quite similar to Chavs in clothing style, but they act differently in a few ways. [editline]14th August 2011[/editline] At least you guys across the pond don't have "Guidos." [img]http://www.nypost.com/rw/nypost/2009/12/25/entertainment/photos_stories/shore153618--300x450.jpg[/img]
Jersey boy too?
[QUOTE=HazeFyer23;31730374]American Chav? I don't even think there are such things[/QUOTE] It was a proxy
[QUOTE=kaine123;31730515]At least you guys across the pond don't have "Guidos." [img]http://www.nypost.com/rw/nypost/2009/12/25/entertainment/photos_stories/shore153618--300x450.jpg[/img][/QUOTE] Seen a couple of them here in Denmark. They're incredibly fond of BMW convertibles and pretending to be superior in any way.
This is england has nothing to do with chavs you idiot.
[QUOTE=Last.Shinobi;31730991]This is england has nothing to do with chavs you idiot.[/QUOTE] Skinheads: The sort of people who you could "actually" have reason to be afraid of.
Israel has spawned its own, unique version to the Chav, called an [b]Ars[/b]. Yeah. [url]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ars_(slang)[/url] "A stereotypical ars wears tight, gaudy clothing and excessive gold jewellery, speaks "street" Hebrew with an excessive reliance on slang and swear words, is disrespectful to women and behaves rudely in public. The ars typically listens to Muzika Mizrahit (Hebrew: מוזיקה מזרחית), a genre in Israeli music originating from Arab music, and easily drawn to using violence - verbal and/or physical." They're Chavs with a middle eastern appearance, basically. Here is a typical group of, in lack of a better term, arses- [img]http://f.nanafiles.co.il/Upload3/xternal/israblog/71/57/27/275771/posts/16472043.jpg[/img]
[QUOTE=Glorbo;31731125]Israel has spawned its own, unique version to the Chav, called an [b]Ars[/b]. Yeah. [url]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ars_(slang)[/url] "A stereotypical ars wears tight, gaudy clothing and excessive gold jewellery, speaks "street" Hebrew with an excessive reliance on slang and swear words, is disrespectful to women and behaves rudely in public. The ars typically listens to Muzika Mizrahit (Hebrew: מוזיקה מזרחית), a genre in Israeli music originating from Arab music, and easily drawn to using violence - verbal and/or physical." They're Chavs with a middle eastern appearance, basically.[/QUOTE] 'Street Hebrew' sounds like the coolest thing ever though
[QUOTE=strayebyrd;31731148]'Street Hebrew' sounds like the coolest thing ever though[/QUOTE] "Street Hebrew" is basically regular Hebrew mixed in with Arab slang and curse words. Hebrew slang draws LOADS of its inspiration from Arabic.
mc smalley yer thats my name gunna go with the flow gunna play the game... music to my ears. An 11 year old piece of talent that we should be proud of.
[QUOTE=rampageturke 2;31728613]you are thick [editline]14th August 2011[/editline] die[/QUOTE] Thank you for your intelligent riposte. I look forward to your humourous contribution to a thread clearly centered around satirical content.
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