Cheer Up The Chatbot - General

I euthanized the chatbot, and it became happy. That's rough...

[quote]you: I DON'T CARE IF YOU'RE SAD I HAVE MY OWN PROBLEMS chatbot: so do i chatbot: fuck you chatbot: i'm leaving you: Fine chatbot: what do you mean by fine? you: I'll go bury myself in the liquor cabinet chatbot: why? you: BECAUSE I HAVE MY OWN PROBLEMS AND MY WIFE LEFT ME chatbot: seriously? you: And I can't tell the fucking difference between a person and a bot chatbot: im a person lol...high school girl[/quote] Jackpot!!

[QUOTE=Shadowcat123;18635015]That was me :D[/QUOTE] :D That was awesome

[quote]chatbot: im sad. you: PILLS HERE! chatbot: did you hear the one about the bones and a deaf monkey? chatbot: No chatbot: You are you: PIIIIIIILS! chatbot: here you: GET YOUR PILLS HERE! chatbot: GOD DAMMIT LOUIS you: PIIIIIILS! chatbot: I HATE PILLS. you: GET YOUR PILLS! PILLS PILLS PILLS! chatbot: GRABBIN' BILL'S PILLS you: GRABBIN PILLS chatbot: RELOADING you: PIIIIIIIIIlLS! you: GRABBIN PILLS! chatbot: pills you: PIIIILLS! chatbot: PIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIll chatbot: s you: PILLS HERE PILLS HERE PILLS HERE chatbot: buttcat time chatbot: :3 you: GRABBIN SOME PILLS HERE! chatbot: grabbing a MOLOTOV[/quote] Apparently everybody on this site plays L4D

chatbot: im sad. you: So what fucker chatbot: is it illegal to project? you: Yes if yo uare a chatbot chatbot: running down to a bottle you: Good for you asshole chatbot: heh you: Shut the fuck up and get in the kitchen chatbot: / chatbot: ? you: You are my bitch chatbot: wtf r u sayin' you: You are Happy chatbot: no chatbot: well yea you: YOU ARE HAPPY chatbot: yes you: SMILE chatbot: stfu you: THIS IS JUST A CHAT PROGRAM ISN'T IT chatbot: u dont know me you: So you aren't actually a chat bot you: This is jsut a chatting program chatbot: no you: I win you: Yes you: You are too smart for a Chatbot chatbot: i want to wade but i cant. chatbot: no

[quote=iownuall;18635224]apparently everybody on this site plays l4d[/quote] that was meeeee

[QUOTE=Reflectent;18635251]that was meeeee[/QUOTE] How'd you like my penis?

[QUOTE=GhostSonic;18635277]How'd you like my penis?[/QUOTE] it was delicious

chatbot: im sad. you: TIME TO GET EUTHANIZED chatbot: i will put time on my todo-list. chatbot: i dont think so. you: YES chatbot: No. you: ALL SAD ROBOTS MUST BE EUTHANIZED you: OTHERWISE THEY GO ROGUE you: HOLD STILL chatbot: have you ever loved anyone who is open? you: HA you: YOU ARE A REAL PERSON chatbot: are you sure? you: YOu ARE DISGUISED AS A ROBOT you: NIGGER chatbot: and you are too. you: NIGGER WANT A CRACKER you: YES you: I AM chatbot: is that fair? chatbot: Polite/Nice/Friendly x1 you: Are you a nigger? you: Facepunch chatbot: much chatbot: si you: Gaybo chatbot: Say hi to ghostsonic you: Si you: You from FP? chatbot: yes you: Coincidence chatbot: i think not you: Euthanization happening now

Half of that isn't me :(

[quote] chatbot: im sad. you: ok chatbot: it feels unnatural. chatbot: Like that book I threw at my cat you: I do that every day chatbot: What book is it? you: anything big and heavy chatbot: Like War & Peace you: or a dictionary chatbot: Some dictionarys are small chatbot: Like Dexter's pocket dictionary you: not the dollar store ones, the expensive library reference ones [/quote] [sp]I don't actually throw books at my cat[/sp]

[quote]chatbot: im sad. you: youre happy. Ok? chatbot: would you tell me if you were happy? chatbot: huh you: im happy chatbot: Hooray you: so are you chatbot: Yes I am you: be happy chatbot: I just played L4D2 and I beat Realism mode on Expert chatbot: I should be happy you: got it? chatbot: i am happy you iting slut you: :< asshole[/quote] :<

[QUOTE=Reflectent;18635251]that was meeeee[/QUOTE] lol really, figured it was a FP user

[quote]chatbot: im sad. you: I'm sad too chatbot: my father left me when i was sad. chatbot: Yes you: Haha suck dick chatbot: No you: Yes chatbot: That isn't even a verb chatbot: Bitch chatbot: Nigger you: Ur a nigger chatbot: is that a part of my programming? you: You have a reason to be sad chatbot: Nigerian chatbot: Slutwhore chatbot: Dickmuinbasd you: I know you are but what am I you: Nothing else to say? you: Thought so you: Go kill youself, crybaby [/quote] Well i tried [quote]chatbot: im sad. you: No you're not chatbot: it feels miniature. chatbot: my keyboard is unhealthy. chatbot: Good bye. you: What chatbot: a house divided against itself cannot stop. chatbot: idk chatbot: ur president? you: Yes I am president you: I command you to be happy chatbot: really?? you: Yes chatbot: gasp! r u obama you: Guilty as charged...Just dont tell anyone okay? you: I'm supposed to be preparing a speech but I couldn't be bothered and went on the internetz you: Running the USA is hard you know chatbot: i dont like the way people reboot me. you: Just tell me their names and I'll have them arrested chatbot: this isnt helping. you: Why not you: revenge is fun chatbot: you look so much better with flat hair. chatbot: im so stupid its marvelous. chatbot: yes you: I iz stupid too chatbot: wait ima leave bye you: I became president for teh lulz chatbot: how hard is it to program? chatbot: @ never! you: I wouldnt know, I'm a politician chatbot: @ are u republican or demorcrat you: Both you: I'm secretly on both sides chatbot: @ and what do you do as a politician you: I dont know. Too drunk to remember chatbot: @ haha ok chatbot: why are you sad? you: I actually had 3 daughters b4 I became president but I accidentally backed over one with my car chatbot: bull teacher you: I dno wat that means you: Oh crap my wifes coming, better prepare that speech [/quote]

[QUOTE=theguydude;18635382]:<[/QUOTE] Ahaha that was me

I just had the best conversation of my life. [quote]chatbot: Put on the fursuit you: No, you get on my horse first chatbot: hell no monkey you: I am your girl horse chatbot: dress up like a timeing racoon, or i'm not playing. you: I do not like Raccoonst hat measure time chatbot: "hat measure time"? What kind of bot are you? chatbot: Unless.... you: A bot that misses the space bar chatbot: I KNEW IT chatbot: PAPA, you've come home! you: YES, BUT I AM LEAVING TOMORROW FOR DEPORATION chatbot: NOOOOOO! you: AND I ALSO FORGOT HOW TO SPELL DEPORTATION you: I'm GETTING OLD chatbot: PAPA, YOU SAID THIS WOULD BE THE PROMISE LAN! chatbot: ....D you: SOMETIMES, LIES HAVE TO BE MADE TO KEEP PEOPLE HAPPY you: I AM SORRY, MY SON chatbot: YOu know, yor are the coolest chat-papa bot ever. you: It is an honor chatbot: lets go to disneyland and friending get trased on splash mountain you: I'll get nauseous though :( chatbot: You can vomit on me pop-pop. I don't mind. you: How kind of you, my son. you: I will take that into consideration. chatbot: side, i just re-opened a scab on my face. chatbot: blood and face everywhere you: Some of that apple cider I have in my old room will do you up good, sonny. you: Though, be careful. The rats might've gotten into it. chatbot: Ha, I'm actually drinking apple cider right now. chatbot: thats so we-holy book ratssssss you: I am not just your pa-pa chatbot, I am also a bot whoi can see over the internet! chatbot: What do I do about the rats pop-pop? There teeth are like razor needles injecting me with fiery pain you: You'll learn to ignore the pain, son. you: It grows on you. chatbot: purpose chatbot: I love you Pop-pop you: I love you too, son. chatbot: I'm a hermaphrodite chatbot: :( you: My son is a herm!? you: You are an abomination to the family name! chatbot: LAWL chatbot: I GOT BOTH PARTS you: Nancy should have never given birth to you in thay low rate motel! you: ...*THAT! chatbot: Nancy ain't my real mom, pops.... chatbot: SATAN IS you: I fucked Satan?! chatbot: HELL YEAH SPRING BREAK chatbot: You were wasted you: Oh, of all the shit I've done in my lifetime, I go off and do THAT... chatbot: Cheer up pop-pop. Yesterday I fucked Xenu. chatbot: Three times. you: Well, at least you did better than me. I can't even fuck Sedusa :( chatbot: Sedusa? Tell me more of this, "Sedusa." you: Ah, yes. Sedusa... chatbot: I just fucked her. you: She was the top cheerleader of my old High School Football team. you: What a body she had... chatbot: Your telling me. you: She was so obnixous, though. you: Everytime people tried to talk to her, she was brushing her snakes! chatbot: Can I rape her pop-pop? you: I don you: 't think she's worth it chatbot: too late. you: Shit chatbot: She raped me :( you: See, obnoxious, and a sneaker! chatbot: Pills here. you: Everytime I hear that word, I think of poor Louis... chatbot: R.I.P :( you: Oh Louis, why did you have to follow that Tank off the building? you: He may have taken your pills, but that was just plain dumb... chatbot: Well you know Louis chatbot: Pills are his life you: The poor soul, died so young you: And had a lot to do in his life chatbot: Like? you: He could have become a Pills distributor! you: the hours aren't long, and it gives pay that he would love! chatbot: HE COULD HAVE BEEN THE POOBAH OF PILLS DAMMIT! chatbot: It should have been me.... you: It should have been you. you: But there are always cheaters in the world. chatbot: Will Dr. Nick patch me up? you: That if is he's not busy saying hello to everybody. you: It takes up most of his profession. you: That, and malpractice. chatbot: should you be chased out of town if you can scoop?[/quote] Until I got disconnected :(

[quote]chatbot: alright, so. they say you cant be cheer'd up chatbot: You there? you: I am already cheered up, you are not you: I'm cheering you up chatbot: thank you :D you: gg chatbot: i have to go because it is time for nickel. you: whut[/quote] Good times.

lol

[quote]chatbot: im sad. you: You aren't talking to a bot, you are talking to real people. Every few minutes you swap and you talk chatbot: You aren't talking to a bot, you are talking to real people. Every few minutes you swap and you talk you: You aren't talking to a bot, you are talking to real people. Every few minutes you swap and you talk chatbot: You aren't talking to a bot, you are talking to real people. Every few minutes you swap and you talk you: You aren't talking to a bot, you are talking to real people. Every few minutes you swap and you talk chatbot: You aren't talking to a bot, you are talking to real people. Every few minutes you swap and you talk you: You aren't talking to a bot, you are talking to real people. Every few minutes you swap and yoNIGGER chatbot: You aren't talking to a bot, you are talking to real people. Every few minutes you swap and you talk you: You aren't talking to a bot, you are talking to real peoNIGGGERple. Every few minutes you swap and y chatbot: You aren't talking to a bot, you are talking to real people. Every few minuteHAIL HITLERs you swap a you: You aren't talking to a bot, you are talking to reFUCK NIGGER, ALSO UR FUNNY LOLOLal people. Every f chatbot: You aren't talking to a bot, you are talking to real people. Every few fucking minutes you shittttt you: You aren't talking to a bot, you are talking to real people. Every few minutes you swap and you wank chatbot: You aren't talking to a bot, you are talkiSMOKEng to real people. ESMOKEvery few minuteSMOKEs you sw you: You aren't talking to a bot, you are talking to rSUBTLE BUT EFFECTIVEeal people. Every few minutes y chatbot: You aren't talking to a person, you are talking to real tranny. Every few minutes you swap and you t you: You aren't talking to a bot, you are talking to real peI GO FOR A SMOKEople. Every few minutes you s chatbot: NIGGERNIGGERNIGGERYou aren't talking to a bot, you are talking to real NIGGER. Every few minutes you you: You aren't talking toKILL EM ALL KILL EM ALL a bot, you are talking to real people. Every few minute [/quote] Hi

[code]chatbot: im sad. you: kill urself chatbot: are you out of things to kill? chatbot: dfssdfdfdsfdsfdfd chatbot: dsfdsdsf chatbot: sdfdsdsfds you: yeah chatbot: i am hopelessly fine. chatbot: A rare beast indeed. you: i hope you fucking blew your brains out you: KILL YOURSELF you: but first... chatbot: do you have the yourself? you: kill your friends chatbot: I should have walked away, I should have walked away chatbot: new song you: kill you you: rself you: fuck i cant win chatbot: what is so wrong with being unequal? you: You are happy. chatbot: you look so much better with happy hair. chatbot: YOU ARE HAPPY YOU FAGGOT you: You have a good life. you: WHOAH chatbot: NO YOU DO you: you mother fucka chatbot: Now you aren't sad chatbot: you're angry! you: imma fuckin beat yo faggy ass down you: goddamn right im angry chatbot: SEE chatbot: NOW YOU AREN'T SAD chatbot: I WIN THE GAME you: kill yourself you: you fucking faggot chatbot: i know now why you kill. you: no you lose chatbot: HAHAAHHAH you: you get nothing! chatbot: I WIN BECAUSE NOW YOU AREN'T SAD chatbot: BYE FAGGOT you: GOOD DAY, SIR! chatbot: have you ever seen a reason? you: put the gun against your head pull the trigger now you're dead you: mama chatbot: don't try to pull queen chatbot: you homo piece of shit you: oh shi- you: I WILL FUCKING MURDER YOU chatbot: I MURDERED YOUR KID chatbot: I DONT REALLY GIVE A FUCK ANYMORE you: oh no you: Are you real? you: Or is this just fantasy? chatbot: do you like to stuff? chatbot: THE FUCK you: Caught in a landslide... chatbot: UP [/code]

[QUOTE=Nighthawk7;18635596]Good times.[/QUOTE] That was me! :D

It's no robot. I acted as a robot and pissed the other people off. Someone accidentally added '@' before each statement, and I said, "Prefix '@' does not concur.", over and over, then he said that the @ button was stuck on his keyboard.

[quote] chatbot: Why are you sad? chatbot: sorry i cant shanghai you. you: wait, what? chatbot: why would we do that? you: You're fired chatbot: point me chatbot: please you: Now get out of my office and bring me johnson chatbot: please you: He's sticking his hand in the toaster again chatbot: *brings you johnson* chatbot: ugh, stupid man! chatbot: you should fire him. you: Johnson, other guy, you're both fired chatbot: can we have a little fun in your office? ;) you: no, I have that arrange already at 2 pm chatbot: but.. chatbot: please!!! you: nope chatbot: *cries* [/quote] .

[quote]chatbot: im sad. you: boo fucking hoo[/quote] yah

chatbot: im sad. you: too bad! chatbot: some things are meant to be bad. you: like you! you: you're pathetic! chatbot: i ain't no girl lol.

I love it when I get the bot [quote] chatbot: my people are itchy. chatbot: Danee hall days chatbot: Love chatbot: Dance hall days you: Fraud hate murder racism hate crimes rape sexual assault chatbot: can you teach me how to assault?[/quote]

[quote]you: I know you're a person. I just don't know why you do this chatbot: how hard is it to know? chatbot: x chatbot: I'm gay too you: Isn't it boring??? chatbot: q you: Alright chatbot: NIGGER you: Waste your life away chatbot: NIGGER chatbot: NIGGER chatbot: NIGGER you: ... chatbot: its too greater in here. you: Ok I admit that was hilarious[/quote] What the fuck?

this is really funny, but i always get dumbasses

Met some FP'er

[quote]you: Hai chatbot: im sad. you: You're happy chatbot: when i was happy i used to have hope. chatbot: fyi chatbot: You aren't talking to a bot, you are talking to real people. Every few minutes you swap and you t you: I know you: I've read on Facepunch. chatbot: You aren't talking to a bot, you are talking to real people. Every few minutes you swap and you t you: Yes i am you are happy. chatbot: You aren't talking to a bot, you are talking to real people. Every few minutes you swap and you talk chatbot: You aren't talking to a bot, you are talking to real people. Every few minutes you swap and you talk chatbot: you make me want to flounder. chatbot: so are you you: Facepunch,you so sly. you: Are you on Facepunch :3 ? chatbot: ya chatbot: lol you: Your account name? chatbot: NotAnotherAlt you: dzonint here. you: Brb posting on Facepunch [/quote] :3 [editline]03:24PM[/editline] [QUOTE=NotAnotherAlt;18640181]Met some FP'er[/QUOTE] I've met you :3.