I'm under attack by bees - General

Nuke the site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.

OP you have any firearms in your home as of current?

Make lots of smoke, get smoke to bees somehow. Also does your door make a good seal to the door because if not THEY WILL GO THROUH THE CRACK, GET AWAY NOW YOU'RE ALL GONNA DIE.

Same thing happened to me last year so me and my father put on 3 layers of clothing and used hairspray + lighters to kill them off.

Take a Windex bottle and drown the bees with the window cleaner.

[QUOTE=Griffster26;36160682]OP you have any firearms in your home as of current?[/QUOTE] A couple, why do you ask? [t]http://dl.dropbox.com/u/24778083/IMAG0005.jpg[/t]

[QUOTE=Ridge;36160933]A couple, why do you ask? [t]http://dl.dropbox.com/u/24778083/IMAG0005.jpg[/t][/QUOTE] The only way to destroy bees is by shooting them. Shoot them.

Step 1: fight the bees. Step 1a: if fighting the bees has failed, try to socialize with them. Step 2: gain the hive's trust. Step 3: Have hot sex with the queen. Step 4: Kill the queen, burn the nest and make a run for it. could have been shorter, eh?

Have an affair with the queen, wait 20 years for your half bee - half human illegitimate son to mature, king & queen bee dies, nephew comes to power, illegitimate son rises up to reclaim rightful power as king.

"You've gotta listen to your dick." - Nathan Explosion

This would be a good time to... Call 911 (I don't what they would do, but they are suppose to save lives and in this case, you are going to get stabbed like fuck) Call the local exterminator. Use a different exit.

Reminds me of the time my whole school went into lock-down because there was a swarm of bees on the school grounds. While everybody was hiding under their desks while the sirens were ringing, our courageous custodian had to go out with a hose and try to wash them away. While we were all in fear of a terrorist attack, our custodian was stung several times and hid in a classroom. He went out to check every 15 minutes to see if the swarm was gone and after about an hour and a half, the swarm was gone. Best part was the fact that after the hour and a half, the school day had ended.

So no one got on the intercom and told you that it wasn't a criminal lockdown? We had a bear once and our school is an open air campus and they just told us not to go to that corner of the campus.

Shoot yourself, it's the painless course of option. Alternatively you could just close your fuckin' window

Panic!

On a serious note, find out what is attracting them. They possibly set up a hive in your roof, or you have really sweet smelling flowers inside, or both.

What the hell, I just misread the title as "I'm under attack by hoes" multiple times. It didn't look right at first so I reread it and still came up with hoes. My be too tired.

Axe body spray is my go-to pesticide.

[QUOTE=DudeGuyKT;36158553]Light a newspaper on fire, blow the smoke through the screen door (window?) with a small fan. They'll get all tired and lethargic and go to the ground, and then you GO OUT AND SMASH EVER SINGLE ONE OF THE LITTLE FUCKERS, DON'T LET ANY LIVE, BURN THEIR BODIES CRUSH THEIR CHILDREN MAKE THEM PAY[/QUOTE] Supposedly gasoline will repel them, too. Douse yourself in gasoline, light up a cigarette, and make a run for it.

I would call an exterminator. They could just be swarming.

Find the queen, pistol-whip her ass. This will intimidate the other bees and they'll leave.

[QUOTE=Al Bundy;36161306]"You've gotta listen to your dick." - Nathan Explosion[/QUOTE] Fun fact: Bees have explosive penises.

Cock slap those little fuckers.

[QUOTE=Ridge;36158236]This picture is a couple minutes old. More keep coming. SOMEONE HELP! [IMG]http://i.imgur.com/hihNj.jpg[/IMG][/QUOTE] What kind of bees are they? Most bees are docile when they are swarming to a new location. If they don't move on fast enough wait until night when they all slow down (hopefully the temp will drop enough). Then you can kill them with a bee spray. [media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YYBRGi38XQI[/media]

Deploy japanese giant hornets to eliminate the bees. [video=youtube;L54exo8JTUs]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L54exo8JTUs[/video]

[QUOTE=zakedodead;36163812]So no one got on the intercom and told you that it wasn't a criminal lockdown? We had a bear once and our school is an open air campus and they just told us not to go to that corner of the campus.[/QUOTE] Our intercom doesn't reach inside the classrooms, as there are only a few speakers placed outside in the quad. Generally we just get a messenger to go into any classroom that needs to get a message, but in this case as it was lock-down they couldn't send a messenger.

Add them on facebook and spam their timeline. It worked for me.

you should try using this. [video=youtube;XHmRfBHI1AE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XHmRfBHI1AE[/video]

So apparently the bees got into the wall. We were given two options, the expensive one is to cut a hole in the wall and remove everything in one go, then close it back up. The cheaper one is to put in a one-way door where they enter, so they can exit, but not get back in. He will then come by every day for a few weeks and vacuum up the guys outside. We are apparently going with the cheap option, even though it means at least 3 weeks of pissed off bees outside. So we're making keys to the back door for the time being.

[QUOTE=Ridge;36176944]So apparently the bees got into the wall. We were given two options, the expensive one is to cut a hole in the wall and remove everything in one go, then close it back up. The cheaper one is to put in a one-way door where they enter, so they can exit, but not get back in. He will then come by every day for a few weeks and vacuum up the guys outside. We are apparently going with the cheap option, even though it means at least 3 weeks of pissed off bees outside. So we're making keys to the back door for the time being.[/QUOTE] How do the bees open the one-way door?