[QUOTE=DualReaverV2;15746396]When she first came on screen, just about every guy in the theater went "aweeee" lol[/QUOTE]
When she first came on, I was in a packed theater and I said Yeah! and no one cheered with me. I was the only one. :[
[QUOTE=Picartman;15746532]When she first came on, I was in a packed theater and I said Yeah! and no one cheered with me. I was the only one. :[[/QUOTE]
You're cool in my books. <3
[quote=d3vils buddy;15704411]
Plane acting from Megan Fox :/
[/quote]
Zoooooooooooom!
Is it a bird? Is it superman? No! It's Megan Fox's Acting!
[QUOTE=DualReaverV2;15746557]You're cool in my books. <3[/QUOTE]
Yay. :D
Awesome awesome awesome romance scene awesome balls joke awesome awesome romantic balls joke awesome awesome.
There's my review.
[QUOTE=strider;15744500][B]This movie is utter shit.[/B]
But saying just this will probably make a bunch of people upset, and I'll end up with a little 'dumb' box under my post with a gigantic number behind it. So let me explain. (spoilers from now on)
First of all, the humour. What the hell, why did they put all that shit in. The little Decepticon that was humping Megan Fox' (Fox's? Foxes?) is probably the thing that everybody is thinking of right now. But it goes beyond 'just not funny'. It's one of the worst scenes in movie history, it doesn't fit in at all. And the thing he said about Megan being hot earlier in the movie didn't really help. Not only are those jokes utter shit, they don't make any sense. Why the hell is that decepticon into human women?
Then ofcourse the 'testicles' joke. “Which one” you ask? Yes there were several and I think that explains the shitty humour of this film all by itself, no further explanation needed. But you asked for it... The twin autobots should've been completely let out or given proper personalities. They were just stupid. And then there's begin about the goddamn parents. Since when does weed instantly make you high in a completely retarded way? It takes like 30 minutes to take effect and makes you slow, not jump around. Guess mr. Bay always was a good boy and doesn't know. But what the fuck I'm not going on about the awful jokes anymore you get the point. On to more annoying flaws of the storyline etc. Oh man the storyline...
That evil Prime fellow, I don't even remember his name he was such a retard, is such an idiot. Well he isn't actually, Michael Bay is. Anyway, he spent two movies on something as easy as grabbing a key and chopping off the top of a pyramid (we'll get there) and blowing up the sun. Why did he have to revive Megatron on the first film, it had no use. But he got killed so evilPrime you should know better now. NO, let's revive him again although he has no use in the story. Why the hell couldn't evilPrime just get the Matrix key himself (in the first movie for all that matters) and blow up the sun. Since that's what he wanted all along. Why take such a rediculous long road through two movies? Oh that's right, mr. Bay wants money.
Anyway, there were so many moments in the film that made me think about how stupid the writers must've been. For example, the scene where the bigass robot climbs on the pyramid. The sector7 guy makes a call to a US ship that HAPPENS to be nearby (in fucking EGYPT) which he HAPPENS to have the radio frequencies to which HAPPENS to have a gigantic top secret laser on it Then the captain, who's a dumb fuck, responds to a complete stranger asking to fire the laser to some vague coordinates positively and could've just blown up the pyramid for all he knew. What an idiot. And then, what bugged me the most, why couldn't he just fire that laser again at evilPrime when he was at the top of the pyramid? Maybe it wouldn't have killed him (only goodPrime can do that) but it might've knocked his ass off that pyramid which would buy the good guys some time. What the hell writers, how stupid are you. Hold on though, I'm not done with this scene yet.
EvilPrime climbs onto the pyramid with a huge headstart but... isn't firing the sun-destroying laser? “Why is that” everybody in the theater is thinking. Oh he explains it, “it's almost ready”... Oh my god.
Oh,
my,
GOD!
[B]THAT LASER HAS BEEN IN THE GODDAMN PYRAMID FOR 1308 BILLION YEARS AND IT STILL NEEDS TIME TO CHARGE OR WHATEVER THE FUCK IT DOES?! [U]WHAT?![/U][/B]
Goddamn it I hate this film. There's so much more wrong with it, I just described one scene in this last part here and it has so many flaws. If you've seen it I can't help you anymore, if you haven't seen it you probably didn't read this because of the spoilers but seriously don't waste your money on this shit.
Now let me puke some Allspark shards (that fall through floors and metal but not through shirts and wooden tables...) Sorry, I'll really stop now.[/QUOTE]
Wow. Haha, Im not replying becuase this angers me (if anything it makes me laugh), but because everything youre saying here is utterly wrong. Its like you went to the theater and stared at the ceiling for two and a half hours.
So Ill go through every point your talking about here.
First, for your humor comments, does it even matter? Youre going pretty crazy over some silly crude humor in a movie. If you havnt realised, the transformers in the movie are really nothing like old cartoons. They have more personality. Ill agree, who knows why the decepticon, calls himself Wheely (or Wheelie?), thought Megan Fox was hot and humped her leg after he decided he wanted to be on the autobots side, was there, but in my opinion, who cares? One scene for about 5 seconds. I think you can deal.
The testicles jokes were always made by that roomate guy (I forget his name), and he always kinda played with a pervert personality. Testicle jokes arnt any less or more funny in this movie than they are in those retarded movies like Superbad and all the other ones that just come flying out of hollywood every few months. They exist. Get over it. The twins. If you ask me, they gave a few laughs. They were meant to be stupid. The weed brownies. Yes, that was kinda silly, but again, to me it just sounds like youre focusing on the bad things and dont know how to just just ignore it. Also, with movies, you never really know how much time passes. I suppose the mom made it from upstairs in Sam's room to outside in front of the school in a matter of seconds, or a day passes in just an hour. And the effects the weed had on her, again, who really cares. Its meant to just be some silly filler. Ignore it.
Oh, good lord, this part made me laugh. First of all I think youre talking about the Fallen cause theres nothing in the movie called "EvilPrime", heh. Also just to make sure I think you made a typo of "movies" from "hours" This plot didnt take two movies. So you say Megatron being revived was useless? This is where i dont think you payed attention. The Fallen couldnt return to Earth to complete his objective until Optimus was killed. And the simple Decepticons doing that themselves? Now thats a joke. Revive Megatron to complete that objective. If the Fallen had come to Earth, Optimus would have been able to destroy him.
This part, once again, made me think you didnt pay attention. Everything youve said here is wrong. When Simmons contacted the captain on that ship, they identified themselves. Simmons was not some random person contacting him on the radio. Second, the railgun was not on the ship the captain was on, it was on a different one to which the captain contacted that ship with the coordinates. Its not even possible for the railgun to destroy the pyramid instead of Devastator. Its a super concentrated electric laser. The only time the railgun couldnt hit a target is if it was moving quickly. Like "EvilPrime" AKA Fallen. So your logic in the comment is flawed.
As for the laser preparing to fire, thats already been explained. It needed the Matrix, and it had to absord the energy.
And your little comment on the cube shard falling through the floor, but not clothes. Notice how when Sam touched it, it activated? Oh thats right, probably not, cause you wernt really paying attention.
Now personally, loved the first one, saw this in imax so I thought it was pretty awesome. Not being a fanboy here, just showing you that basically every comment youve made in your rage rant here is either useless or flawed.
The movie was pretty good to me
[QUOTE=Soulbrother;15746466]I believe it was Rainn Wilson from The Office. (AKA Dwight)[/QUOTE]
How the hell do you pronounce his first name? Is it rain? As in "oh dear, it's raining"?
[QUOTE=Canuhearme?;15737608]Would you kindly go watch Transformers 2?[/QUOTE]
choices
slam movie with a golf club? y/n
y
the right choice
[editline]11:41PM[/editline]
[QUOTE=strider;15744500][B]This movie is utter shit.[/B]
But saying just this will probably make a bunch of people upset, and I'll end up with a little 'dumb' box under my post with a gigantic number behind it. So let me explain. (spoilers from now on)
First of all, the humour. What the hell, why did they put all that shit in. The little Decepticon that was humping Megan Fox' (Fox's? Foxes?) is probably the thing that everybody is thinking of right now. But it goes beyond 'just not funny'. It's one of the worst scenes in movie history, it doesn't fit in at all. And the thing he said about Megan being hot earlier in the movie didn't really help. Not only are those jokes utter shit, they don't make any sense. Why the hell is that decepticon into human women?
Then ofcourse the 'testicles' joke. “Which one” you ask? Yes there were several and I think that explains the shitty humour of this film all by itself, no further explanation needed. But you asked for it... The twin autobots should've been completely let out or given proper personalities. They were just stupid. And then there's begin about the goddamn parents. Since when does weed instantly make you high in a completely retarded way? It takes like 30 minutes to take effect and makes you slow, not jump around. Guess mr. Bay always was a good boy and doesn't know. But what the fuck I'm not going on about the awful jokes anymore you get the point. On to more annoying flaws of the storyline etc. Oh man the storyline...
That evil Prime fellow, I don't even remember his name he was such a retard, is such an idiot. Well he isn't actually, Michael Bay is. Anyway, he spent two movies on something as easy as grabbing a key and chopping off the top of a pyramid (we'll get there) and blowing up the sun. Why did he have to revive Megatron on the first film, it had no use. But he got killed so evilPrime you should know better now. NO, let's revive him again although he has no use in the story. Why the hell couldn't evilPrime just get the Matrix key himself (in the first movie for all that matters) and blow up the sun. Since that's what he wanted all along. Why take such a rediculous long road through two movies? Oh that's right, mr. Bay wants money.
Anyway, there were so many moments in the film that made me think about how stupid the writers must've been. For example, the scene where the bigass robot climbs on the pyramid. The sector7 guy makes a call to a US ship that HAPPENS to be nearby (in fucking EGYPT) which he HAPPENS to have the radio frequencies to which HAPPENS to have a gigantic top secret laser on it Then the captain, who's a dumb fuck, responds to a complete stranger asking to fire the laser to some vague coordinates positively and could've just blown up the pyramid for all he knew. What an idiot. And then, what bugged me the most, why couldn't he just fire that laser again at evilPrime when he was at the top of the pyramid? Maybe it wouldn't have killed him (only goodPrime can do that) but it might've knocked his ass off that pyramid which would buy the good guys some time. What the hell writers, how stupid are you. Hold on though, I'm not done with this scene yet.
EvilPrime climbs onto the pyramid with a huge headstart but... isn't firing the sun-destroying laser? “Why is that” everybody in the theater is thinking. Oh he explains it, “it's almost ready”... Oh my god.
Oh,
my,
GOD!
[B]THAT LASER HAS BEEN IN THE GODDAMN PYRAMID FOR 1308 BILLION YEARS AND IT STILL NEEDS TIME TO CHARGE OR WHATEVER THE FUCK IT DOES?! [U]WHAT?![/U][/B]
Goddamn it I hate this film. There's so much more wrong with it, I just described one scene in this last part here and it has so many flaws. If you've seen it I can't help you anymore, if you haven't seen it you probably didn't read this because of the spoilers but seriously don't waste your money on this shit.
Now let me puke some Allspark shards (that fall through floors and metal but not through shirts and wooden tables...) Sorry, I'll really stop now.[/QUOTE]
it's ironic how you got 6 dumb ratings
from 6 idiots who are wowed by explosions and probably like the matrix
CGI robots bashing the living shit out of each other? Awesome.
Slightly weird storyline that almost completely detaches itself from the first film? Meh I suppose.
As many people have said already, this film is for those that enjoy the action over storyline. For those that enjoy a nice rock and roll film with tons of shit happening on screen, but can accept pretty cliche dialogue and story, its a decent film.
Final notes:
- recommend this to be watched at a normal theatre. I saw this at the IMAX in Sydney, the close up fight scenes were slightly disorientating to say the least. But with that said, the slow motion close ups (of both robots and Megan Fox's ass and cleavage) do make for quite an experience.
- [sp] Optimus Prime getting an upgrade equates to awesomeness [/sp]
[QUOTE=M_B;15747166]choices
slam movie with a golf club? y/n
y
the right choice
[editline]11:41PM[/editline]
it's ironic how you got 6 dumb ratings
from 6 idiots who are wowed by explosions and probably like [B]the matrix[/B][/QUOTE]
I thought everybody liked the matrix...?
[QUOTE=Hayabusa07;15746271]Imagine a Beast Wars movie (directed by someone else)
Shit'd be fuckin' awesome. No human bullshit.[/QUOTE]
No. Because I couldn't see why a Transformer would feel the need to disguise himself in front of a bunch of lizards
Now that I have seen the movie for myself; [b]REVIEW[/b]:
[b]SPOILERS/SUMMARY, Read at your own risk[/b]
The intro to the movie was a bit odd knowing that these Transformers have existed for eons and have only been [widely] discovered in the twenty-first century when they had generations and generations to do they're shit. But that's for plot purposes, so whatever. So the Transformers are gathering Energon from killing stars, the good Transformers have sworn not to kill stars that support life on planets. Some of the Transformers don't care for 'lesser species' and try to kill the star anyway. A war inevitably breaks out. The Matrix of Leadership, some strange key that activates the Sun Harvester, is taken by the original Transformers and they make a tomb for it out of their own bodies which also leaves it lost to history. Most of which is revealed later on in the film. So then it's off to Shanghai for the next scene as an apparent 'chemical spill' has happened when in reality NEST is hunting a Decepticon [apparently known as Demolishor] with they're Autobot allies Ironhide, Sideswipe, Mudflap and Skidz (as an ice-cream truck at first), Arcee and her 'sisters' I guess. SO Demolishor goes ballistic and begins tearing shit up, guns blazing massive destruction stuff. There's apparently another Decepticon there who transforms briefly before Sideswipe splits him in two. So then Optimus comes and intercepts Demolishor while he runs rampant throughout Shanghai. Before I go on from there; How is it that this stuff is covered up? The first movie's final battle within the city had so many bystanders (not to mention civilian casualties) How the hell was it covered up? Anyway, So after civilian casualties rising into the thousands, Optimus Prime and Ironhide (I honestly don't remember him latching on) are able to wrestle Demolishor down and execute him after his warning about the return of The Fallen.
So then we see Sam Witwicky, our unlikely hero of the universe and all living life from the first film going off to college. Though his mothers action is understandable yet semi-exaggeration it got annoying quickly, Ron (Sam's father) is always fun to listen to how he deals with the situation though. So Sam is talking to Mikaela saying that he's got a webcam for their long distance relationship. In the middle of his conversation he dishes out his 'war-torn' sweater seen in the first fill where, out from the pocket, falls an All-Spark sliver, when he holds it up and looks at it, it indents (figuratively) it's information within his mind. For some reason it becomes hot making him drop it. As it burns through the floor it lands into the kitchen, where I swear to God they just clutter all their appliances. Anywho the shard is activated changing household appliances (toaster, vacuum cleaner, blender, etc.) into evil robots (Why they're not 'born' good I don't know, oh and one actually happens to have a laser penis... :/). They then go after Sam (again I'm not too sure why) and wreak havoc in the house. So as Sam jumps from the window into the yard, continually under fire, he calls for Bumblebee's assistance. Bumblebee, with no regard for their home proceeds to blast away the All-Spark cretins. As he finishes up the fire department begins to show up Bumblebees flees into the garage where he seems to be living, oh and Mikaela shows up after Sam's conversation on the phone that was interrupted. Sam then proceeds to tell Bumblebee that he should be with Optimus and the gang as Sam goes off to college rather than being cooped up in the garage all day. While this is going on Mikaela is changing (which didn't need all the scenes it had. I mean we get it, Megan Fox is hot, everyone has or will masturbate to her sometime during or after the film) So for whatever reason Sam and Mikaela have issues in saying 'I love you' to each other when clearly they do. After a small argument (nothing big) Sam gives the AllSpark sliver to Mikaela and leaves for college.
When Sam arrives he meets his roommate Leo, who I kind of felt took the seat of Anthony Anderson [from the previous film]. Leo is your all-too-common internet conspirator who thinks the government is covering up what happened in Shanghai and that city from the first film [Boulder City I think]. But, really? How can anyone NOT know about it? There are SO many people who MUST HAVE seen it, heard it, were injured in it, and so on. So yea, he and several other buddies of his have a website that posts this conspiracy stuff. They also mention how they are in competition with another website *foreshadow*. Sam's parents come to meet Sam's new roommate. His mother bought some products which actually happen to be drugs (in brownies, I'm not much of a druggy so I don't know the actual terminology for it) So after eating a couple of them she begins going a bit crazy. This is one of the ridiculous parts that really didn't need to be included, she runs around saying random stuff and pounces onto a student or someone. Sam's father along with Sam hurry and get her out of there before any further embarrassment ensues.
We return to see Optimus, the Autobots, and the members of NEST return to their HQ where they discuss the Decepticon activity and where Mudflap and Skidz change to better advertisement-worthy cars. Some jackhole from another branch of government known as SASF, confronts Prime and NEST about why the Decepticons are really here, which he believes is that the Decepticons are hunting the Autobots bringing unnecessary conflicts and deaths on Earth. He's also pissed by the fact that Prime gave an open invitation to all Autobots without Presidential consent. So Soundwave, a Decepticon satellite who sounds a bit like Claw from the Inspector gadget, is gathering this info via hacking another satellite. In mid conversation Graham (the SASF dude) unwittingly reveals the location of Megtron's body and the 'last' piece of the All-Spark to the Decepticons. As Soundwave Soundwave hears this he relays the information to other Decepticons and fires Ravage, a kick-ass panther-like Decepticon infiltrator, into retrieve the All-Spark piece. He finds an airvent and barfs several nano bots down the air vent. When the nano bots reach their destination (the All-Spark's incubation room), they combine forming an extremely thing larvae/snake-like Insecticon known as Reedman (not mentioned in the film) that begins to retrieve the piece. The military have become aware of the Decepticon's/Insecticon's presence and mobilize into the room. Reedman, being razor thin hides rather easily, but it swiftly begins making its escape by leaping through one poor soldier and out of the hangar to meet up with Ravage. Ravage proceeds to give covering fire as they dash off with the shard. Ravage then meets up with Constructicons (Decepticons with Construction vehicle personas, duh) who are on a cargo ship. Together they jump into the water and into the Laurentian Abyss where they use the AllSpark shard to resurrect Megatron (after they brutally mutilate one of their own for parts to repair Megatron). Megatron then flies out of the water, destroying a nearby submarine, and flies off to what looks like Jupiter, where a Cybertronian structure seems to be. Here he tells Starscream that he was a coward leaving him to die on Earth, claiming he is the leader through life and death. But even leaders have leaders apparently where Megatron meets with one of the original Transformers known as The Fallen. The Fallen declares vengeance on Optimus Prime, the descendant to the Primes who were the original Transformers, who were also The Fallen's brothers (kind of confusing, also didn't Optimus say in the first film that he is Megatron's brother? 'You left me no choice, brother'). The Fallen also mentions how only a Prime can defeat him. He then orders Megatron to capture Sam and extract the AllSpark's knowledge, and the location of the Sun Harvester, that has been engraved into his mind.
We then return to Sam on his first night in college who is going to a party with Leo, though he also has a webcam date with Mikaela. So as Sam is at the party he start's seeing Cybertronian symbols which he begins drawing with cake icing. A sexy seductive college mate named Alice sees Sam doing this and interrupts him asking him to dance. Before things can go any further someone begins complaining about a certain camaro on the lawn (Oh Bumblebee, you loveable simpleton). Sam notices that it's Bumblebee and is wondering what the hell he's doing there. He gets in and Alice follows (despite Sam not wanting her to. Really girl take a hint). So as they drive Bumblebee does his romantic radio shenanigans, slams her head on the dashboard (at least that's what it looked like from where I was sitting, not all too sure what really happened) and began, I guess, internally urinating on her (seriously, Bumblebee has a bladder problem, he pissed on Simmons in the first film and now not only did he piss on Alice he also pissed all over himself. Good job Bumblebee, good job, But I think you should get Ratchet to fix more than just his voice (Plus in the first film Bumblebee's voice is fixed, in this film Sam says something like 'He's playing it off' or something. Why won't he talk he sounded pretty cool. But I guess silent, cute-noise making guardians are cool too). After Bumblebee's little 'accident' Alice gets out and Bumblebee takes Sam to meet up with Optimus Prime. During this meeting Optimus tells Sam of how the the SASF wants them off the planet and that the humans need to be reminded by a fellow human why the Autobots are there. Sam, being semi-selfish and kind of a douche, declines his request just wanting a normal life.
In Sam's astronomy class (convenient) he begins having a mental meltdown where he begins drawing the Cybertronian symbols and explaining how Einstein's theory is wrong, basically going crazy (Like his grandfather, as referenced in the first film. Was all this planned or are these films good at blending together?). So Sam's teacher kicks him out of class (How come in both Transformers movies the people of authority are all morons? The cop in the first one, Simmons (he's better in this one), the teacher). Sam calls Mikaela about what is happening making the realization that this began when he looked at the AllSpark piece, so he warns her not to touch it. As this conversation is happening, a small remote control car Decepticon known as Wheelie is hacking the safe where Mikaela hid the sliver. Being a cluts, stepping on some conveniently place mouse traps, Mikaela over hears him, burns his eye out, and tosses him in a box. When Sam returns to his dorm he continues to draw the symbols all over in anything he can find (paint, marker, chalk, etc.). He then also goes to Hyper-Hyper-Active. Alice, stalking Sam, goes to the room and sees the symbols, she kicks Leo out of the room and begins seducing Sam. As this is happening, Mikaela is coming to meet Sam, and predictably she walks in on Sam and Alice kissing. As Mikaela is walking away Sam tries to explain the 'it's not how it looks' moment, but [b]SURPRISE[/b] Alice is a freaking Terminator... Uh I mean Decepticon (and because I know little to nothing about Transformers mythos I have no clue why she is able to have a human form while the others have to be vehicles. I was warned.) So she parades through the college trying to blow Sam, Mikaela, and of course Leo up. The trio get into Mikaela's car (She has a motorcycle, a car, next thing you know she'll have a jet.) and they run over the T-X/Alice (Seriously, She looked a lot like the T-X from Terminator 3). Then random helicopter comes and carries the car off to some secluded warehouse or wharf or some shit. Megatron's there with some mini-Decepticon spider thing called the Doctor (Scalpel in the toy line). Scalpel puts some strange worm like thing which I swear we saw in The Matrix into Sam's mouth which somehow got the AllSpark info from his brain. Before any further torture can proceed Optimus Prime bursts through the roof along with some other Autobots and fights Starscream and Megatron. As the fight continues Sam get's in Optimus (in truck form), Leo and Mikaela get in Bumblebee, and the flee the area. Megatron of course pursues Optimus. After I guess several hours of driving they're out of the city and in the woods where, I swear to God, the most epic fight scene in the entire movie ensues. Megatron, Starscream, and some Blackout wannabe named Grindor team up on Optimus (Seriously, what happened to Blackout? Whatever happened to Barricade for that matter? Both lived, both were not in the sequel, I guess they could be in the sequel's sequel. Grindor is exactly like Blackout just lighter in color). Optimus manages to kill Grindor (thank God, there can only be one Decepticon chopper) by splitting his head in two (For an extremely advanced race, these guy's fighting is more brutal than our own) and after doing severe damage on Starscream and minor damage on Megatron, Megatron [b]impales Prime and blows a hole through him[/b]. Graceful. This, though I heard rumors and shit, was the most shocking, and unexpected moment in the entire movie, even when the trailers were first showing I suspected Prime's death (one of the few things I know of Transformers is Optimus dies and Primus comes, I think that's how it went) but actually seeing it happen was rather shocking. So Sam feels helpless, Megatron is finally victorious, and the rest of the Autobots come to get Sam.
Megatron and Starscream flee from battle and declare a full-scale assault on the planet Earth, calling a good number of Decepticons and Constructicons. The Fallen hacks Earth's networks, and advises that Earth surrenders the Sam to them or be destroyed. As the Decepticons are mobilizing world-wide, some manage to land in Paris, France where Sam's parents are staying for a month (especially after what Bumblebee did to theit house..). Things then become a race against time as the Decepticons now have some of the AllSpark knowledge. Leo believes that the orchestrator of his rival conspiracy website could be of assistance. They follow this lead which leads them to Agent Simmons from the first film who has stuped to a butcher, or whatever, something to do with meat and white outfits. So in the meat freezer's basement is Simmon's library of Sector7 documents where he explains that archaeologists have been finding the similar markings all over the world. After Simmons implies a Decepticon may know what they mean, Mikaela gets the bright idea of getting that annoying bugger Wheelie to help. As he does he reveals the locations of several Transformers who have been around for thousands of years looking for The Matrix of Leadership. The closest one being in Washington D.C., in the Smithsonian (I was scared Ben Stiller may have appeared in the film when I heard that.) So using Wheelie, some device Simmons has, and the AllSpark shard they find an SR-71 Blackbird, using the AllSpark shard they're able to 'awaken' him (He's old apparently, doesn't change well, and what the hell do any of the Transformers do when shit isn't going down? I'll expand on that question later). So, yeah, This Decepticon's name is Jetfire, he switched sides (right on the spot) and began giving a history lesson on The Matrix of Leadership and the original Transformers. Earlier in this area of the movie is where the infamous Wheelie-Humping-Fox comes into play. Highly unnecessary. Also during this time they're all teleported to Egypt where The Matrix is hidden. Jetfire gives some strange riddle that Simmons and Sam try to decipher which eventually leads them to the tomb of Petra or someplace similar. After Mudflap and Skidz have a somehow-provoked fight they damage one of the walls, revealing the tomb of the Primes. When Sam touches the Matrix though it dissolves to dust (Well it is a couple thousand years old), but Sam desperate to revive Optimus Prime with it (Oh yeah, someplace in the film Sam makes the realization that if The Matrix is energy it must be able to bring Optimus back to life). Still believeing it could revive Optimus he collects it's dust. Soon after Sam and Mikaela have a romantic moment where for some reason I was fixated on Shia LeBeouf's growing facial hair, which I had been noticing throughout the film... but in this moment they're still having 'I love you' problems. Sam then makes another Realization that the riddle Jetfire was talking about refers to the pyramids of Giza and how they are aligned with the stars. Sometime around this point of the film Simmons calls the NEST to deliver Optimus' body so Sam can revive him. Here the NEST team head off to Egypt to some Egyptian town kind of like that desert town in the first one, but more Egyptian ruins. Soundwave of course notices this, Starscream pursues, Starscream EMP's, No communication. So then Mudflap, Skidz, Simmons, and Leo decide to split from the group as some form of distraction, They soon find themselves cornered by a crap-load of Constructicons. Bumblebee, Mikaela, and Sam are making there way to the soldiers who at this point are under fire from a lot of generic Decepticons who just arrived and some of the others who have been there. The Autobots also provide support against the Decepticon forces. As Sam and Mikaela are running Ravage and Rampage deploy a trap using Sam's parent's as bait. As Rampage has them at gun point Bumblebee counter-attacks leaping onto Rampage. Ravage wanting some actual bot fighting leaps onto Bumblebee's face. Bumblebee over-powers the frenzied feline and tears him in half (oddly he had some green goo on his skeletal parts). When Sam is reunited with his parents he has a brief yet kind of touching moment where his father is trying to get him to leave with them, but he refuses and tells Bumblebee to escort his parents away. Back to Leo and Simmons; the Constructicons begin to combine into what everyone by now knows is Devastator. Devastator begins sucking up the sand, cars, and all the random shits around the area. Mudflap is one of those randoms shits being sucked up, thank God. But no, he comes back beating out of Devastator's head even though everything else that went through Devastator was turned to smog or something. So yeah, Mudflap and Skidz get their only fight scene which actually raised my liking of them a little.
Somewhere at this point of the film Devastator begins scaling the the Pyramids and reveals the Sun Harvester at the top of the Pyramid of Khufu, and Simmons calls in a 'Railgun' strike on his location, which happens to be, the infamous wrecking ball scrotum. Again unnecessary. So, one shot from the rail gun on the destroyer ship and Devastator dies. Uneventful really.
Sam and Mikaela rendezvous with Major Lennox and Epps (after everybody's favorite Megan Fox slow-mo). Lennox tells Sam where Prime's body is and they prepare to make a dash, but are attacked by what looks like Mixmaster (which is strange since he supposedly combined to make Devastator, then again they did have Bonecrusher's vehicle form [from the first film] and a Blackout wannabe so whatever). Whoever it is Jetfire swoops in and takes out a thousand year old can of whoop-ass on him, beating him with his cane. THEN as the sand has a familiar splash to it our old friend Scorponok pops out attempting to fight Jetfire, only to get his head stepped on and thus killed... sorry Scorponok, no Beast Wars movie for you. Sam, Mikaela, Lennox, and Epps make a dash for Prime's body. Megatron and The Fallen, over-looking the battle and activating the Sun Harvester, see this, and Megatron goes to stop it. As Sam is running one of Megatron's dozen shots finally hits where Sam was running leaving him unconscience and fried. Here Sam gets a message from The Dynasty of Primes (the original Transformers) telling him that for his efforts in helping Optimus, he has earned the The Matrix. Now I know some people are claiming this makes no sense, but honestly I think it kind of does. Sam had all the information from the AllSpark in his mind, the AllSpark would/could hold knowledge of The Dynasty of Primes and maybe absorbed their energy. This would allow them in a sort of angelical way communicate with Sam. I may have to watch the movie again, but that's a possible explanation. So for Sam's efforts in helping Optimus, the pieces of The Matrix come together again forming The Matrix. When Sam is revived (possibly by the 'power of The Dynasty' or something else but whatever) he impales Optimus Prime with The Matrix bringing him back to life. All seems well until The Fallen teleports in stealing The Matrix so it may power the Sun Harvester. Optimus' power is depleting without it, Jetfire then comes in making a speech-ish thing about how if he were to combine with Optimus he could over-power The Fallen, he proceeds by tearing out the human equivalent of a heart. Graceful. Jolt, a character who is only being mentioned now because this is literally the only point he plays any importance, which is hard to say for a guy [b]who never talked[/b] (which is semi-understandable being a last-minute addition, but still) So Jolt and Ratchet patch up Optimus Prime with Jetfire's parts. Optimus then because a buff flying Blackbird Truck thing where he flies up to the Sun Harvester fires a shot, [b]A[/b] shot blowing up the Sun Harvester. Again uneventful really. Then he dukes it out with The Fallen and Megatron. Optimus first beats Megatron to the point where he actually bleeds (They have blood?) but also to the point where he's out of the fight. The Fallen gets his face torn off and ultimately killed. Megatron and Starscream seemingly being the only survivors. After some 'You came back for me' speech from Optimus, he gives a speech [like in the end of the first film] notifying all remaining Autobots of the history that was made there or something.
[b]IN CONCLUSION[/b]
The movie was great, awesome fights, I thought the story was good, Mudflap and Skidz had a few chuckle wrothy moments, the movie had some moments where you just had to ask yourself "Is that really necessary?" A major plus for me to this movie are the voice acting and acting in general. Peter Cullen was great as Optimus of course, since he is [b]THE Optimus Prime[/b], Megatron lost a lot of his seemingly demonic voice from the first and appeared more natural sounding, Charlie Adler's Starscream I had to laugh since he sounded so much like his Cobra Commander voice from G.I. Joe: Resolute. Shia LeBeouf for some reason I can never come to hate, I always think he's good. Now I think I'm beginning to know why Steven Spielberg likes milking his career. My major disappointment is with the new Transformers. Sideswipe could have been a cooler character if he had more to do, Arcee and her 'sisters' could also have been developed more, especially since Arcee seems to be a big character and Chromia has relations with Ironhide (Which I find funny since Chromia is the Blue motor-cycle Autobot who says something to Sam and then gets shot and killed, not robot love interests..) The Fallen was a pretty cool villain too, just wish he had a longer final fight, something that actually made it seem like he could mount against Optimus. Plus, it was awesome hearing Kevin Michael Richardson's voice as one of The Dynasty of Primes.
[b]IN THE FUTURE[/b]
For future films they should dwell more into the titled characters, but evenly distribute the attention. If it's too much about the robots people [other than fans] can lose interest, too much about the humans, it loses th purpose of calling it Transformers. In addition, develop some relationship betweent the Autobots, like Ironhide and Chromia's relationship could have been good (not any more seeing as she's dead..). As for enemies, might as well go all out to the point of having Unicron, and as pointed out in an interview with Josh Duhamel, the Autobots could lend some of the technology to the members of NEST which also allows them to go off world and fight Unicron. These of course are just suggestions.
Now, I started this write up around 10:00 P.M. it's now 3:31 A.M. Good night, I hope you have a good fucking long read. In Microsoft Word this entire thing is seven pages long :v: Longest post I have ever done.
[QUOTE=M_B;15747166]
it's ironic how you got 6 dumb ratings
from 6 idiots who are wowed by explosions and probably like the matrix[/QUOTE]
No, he was rated dumb because he got the plot completely wrong.
Watched this yesterday. Awful awful movie.
Cliche'd, obvious, stupid. Why can the old robot teleport around but no-one else can? What the fuck is with the 2 black stereotype robots? Fuck me is it 1970! What's with all the balls jokes!
But what did I expect eh, it's a kids film.
[QUOTE=PS360;15745875]It's not a toy commercial.
it's a fucking movie.[/QUOTE]
[url]http://tfwiki.net/wiki/To_sell_toys[/url]
why do only I like this movie. :sigh:
[QUOTE=garry;15748626]Watched this yesterday. Awful awful movie.
Cliche'd, obvious, stupid. Why can the old robot teleport around but no-one else can? What the fuck is with the 2 black stereotype robots? Fuck me is it 1970! What's with all the balls jokes!
But what did I expect eh, it's a kids film.[/QUOTE]
1.) He's a very skilled transformer, also one of the oldest, if you listened to the plot it kinda was explained
2.) Comic relief? in a movie? fuck!!!
3.) Comic relief? in a movie? fuck!!!
the only people that don't like this movie lack the ability to be able to just have fun, they always just look at specific things like how "dum teh plot r". I don't think the plot was that dumb, i thought it was cool, and if you listened to the god damn movie a lot would make more sense, but no, you just hate it to be cool
Great, this is what this movie needs. More stereotypical Black robots.
[QUOTE=garry;15748626]Watched this yesterday. Awful awful movie.
Cliche'd, obvious, stupid. Why can the old robot teleport around but no-one else can? What the fuck is with the 2 black stereotype robots? Fuck me is it 1970! What's with all the balls jokes!
But what did I expect eh, it's a kids film.[/QUOTE]
Haha, kids film? The dry humping is kiddy?
I noticed how in the first one they kept it a clean PG-13. Not much cussing or anything like that. Yet in the second one, they had a more PG-13 feel to it. More cussing and innuendo. Even drug references. Pretty cool imo. None of that kiddy PG-13 shit.
[QUOTE=Rankzerox;15744178]
[editline]01:19AM[/editline]
You havent seen it.[/QUOTE]
I was at the premiere.
The twins totally killed the movie, they were the Jar jar binks of 2009.
I'm so fucking happy that I got a free ticket.
i dont get it, about the twins. they were funny, but were they stereotyping black people or wiggers?
[QUOTE=lolwutdude;15749001]i dont get it, about the twins. they were funny, but were they stereotyping black people or wiggers?[/QUOTE]
It's like if they had a robot with a massive nose and a jewish accent that loved money or something. I get that they were trying to add a level of humor and stuff.. but it was a negative outdated stereotype.
[editline]12:27PM[/editline]
[QUOTE=NotLamb;15748727]1.) He's a very skilled transformer, also one of the oldest, if you listened to the plot it kinda was explained[/QUOTE]
The evil robots were the same age and they couldn't do that shit. And surely if they had descendants, they would have got stronger, not weaker.
Why Tazers Hurt hated this film:
I tried to do what most of you did: come into the theater expecting nothing much other than cool robots and explosions. The stupid plot was REALLY bad (mwahaha lets take lots of time to get the kids brain, I'm old I'm the only one who can teleport, wow how convenient we're right next to the boat with the lazor beem, oh no robot heaven) but I expected stuff like that. I could handle that. A bucket of popcorn is all you need.
What I did NOT expect (or want) are the stupid stereotypes, humping dogs, humping robots, robot balls, horny robots, robot dick-gun, or any of that. I mean seriously what the hell.
For fucks sake this is TRANSFORMERS. Treat the franchise with a little respect, can't you? Christ
[QUOTE=garry;15749195]It's like if they had a robot with a massive nose and a jewish accent that loved money or something. I get that they were trying to add a level of humor and stuff.. but it was a negative outdated stereotype.
[editline]12:27PM[/editline]
The evil robots were the same age and they couldn't do that shit. And surely if they had descendants, they would have got stronger, not weaker.[/QUOTE]
The Fallen teleported to earth, did he not?
[QUOTE=M_B;15747166]
it's ironic how you got 6 dumb ratings
from 6 idiots who are wowed by explosions and probably like the matrix[/QUOTE]
Thank you.
Also a lot of people are saying 'you're so dumb you haven't seen the cartoons/haven't read the comics so you don't understand this/that'. That doesn't make any sense. You're saying you can only enjoy this film or atleast understand the plot better when you have read or seen those old cartoons and comics? That's bullshit because nobody has done that apart from some bigtime fans from back then. Especially where I live where maybe one Transformer cartoon ever aired. A film shouldn't be dependent on old stuff like that. And I don't even think it is so knowing the franchises history wouldn't make me find this a better movie. It would probably just destroy more childhood memories.
[editline]02:54PM[/editline]
[QUOTE=ray243;15748782]Haha, kids film? The dry humping is kiddy?[/QUOTE]
Listen to yourself man.
I just saw it yesterday night and have to say I wasn't impressed. Too much action for no purpose. Too much explosions and effects in general, they seemed to lost their meaning.
Looking at it as a movie goer, the movie was awesome.
Looking at it as a critic, it was a bad movie.
[QUOTE=Skelmech;15748708]why do only I like this movie. :sigh:[/QUOTE]
Have you even read most of the comments in this thread?
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