"Baby's first natural male enhancement pill," or "Stop making absurd baby products." - General

[QUOTE=Benki;29591495]Glad I didn't have any type of shit like this bought for me as a child. Also, baby leash/harnesses look ridiculous. They may look handy for keeping an eye on your child, but jesus fuck it's not a pet.[/QUOTE] I had to wear one when I went to Disney World when I was like.... 6. I had a terrible case of ADHD so I'd get away from my parents and run off somewhere because I saw something shiny. All they'd have to do is look away for one. Split. Second. And I was gone.

[QUOTE=Sobotnik;29577485]Ever heard of adoption?[/QUOTE] How exactly would you even come close to the requirements for adopting a child?

[QUOTE=Zeke129;29577366]The old ways aren't necessarily the best ways[/QUOTE] This is also true. [editline]3rd May 2011[/editline] [QUOTE=SuperDuperScoot;29601926]I had to wear one when I went to Disney World when I was like.... 6. I [B]had[/B] a terrible case of ADHD so I'd get away from my parents and run off somewhere because I saw something shiny. All they'd have to do is look away for one. Split. Second. And I was gone.[/QUOTE] Implies YOU never had it in the first place :v: It doesn't disappear.

I like how ADHD patients blame anything on their condition. Oh look, he sees something shiny and tries to grab it. That has nothing to do with him being 6. He must have ADHD!

[QUOTE=Sobotnik;29598158]Hence the reason he was an idiot and lost the war.[/QUOTE] Hitler lost the war for a number of reasons, and not being Prussian wasn't one of them.

As much as this horrifies me, I'm sure it's not like that everywhere.

[QUOTE=Swilly;29604113]This is also true. [editline]3rd May 2011[/editline] Implies YOU never had it in the first place :v: It doesn't disappear.[/QUOTE] I say "Had" because I kinda learned how to control the worst parts, with the assistance of meds of course.... Still can "come back" and throw me off guard. [QUOTE=Gromargh;29604276]I like how ADHD patients blame anything on their condition. Oh look, he sees something shiny and tries to grab it. That has nothing to do with him being 6. He must have ADHD![/QUOTE] That's true for me even to this day, I get easily distracted by shiny objects. I'm 16 now. :v: Worst thing I have problems with is concentration and retaining information in my head. My mind jumps through about 50 (exaggeration) subjects at once and I can't play a scene through my head without it skipping to another part or going back to a previous part or just completely jumping off track. And keeping my attention is harder then keeping a 3 year old's attention. [editline]4th May 2011[/editline] Oh yeah and if you can't tell already, I have a terrible time getting out what exactly what I want to say so it causes a lot of confusion...

[QUOTE=Swilly;29604113] Implies YOU never had it in the first place :v: It doesn't disappear.[/QUOTE] Chances are, if a kid 'outgrows' ADHD, they never had it in the first place, and were simply being kids. When I was a kid, everyone in my class had a shitty attention span.

[QUOTE=Bran;29606504]Chances are, if a kid 'outgrows' ADHD, they never had it in the first place, and were simply being kids. When I was a kid, everyone in my class had a shitty attention span.[/QUOTE] There seems to be a recent trend (Last 5-10 years IMO) to diagnose kids with every condition under the sun when really the words they are looking for are "they are a child" or "you are a bad parent". IMO this takes away the "value" of a diagnosis, meaning that people who really have ADHD etc do not get the treatment they need.

[QUOTE=Big Dumb American;29574185]I was recently hired on as a member of the Flow team for a Target Superstore in my area. My job's duties, in a nutshell, are to unload the trucks in the morning and move all the merchandise to the floor. It's not a bad gig, the pay's alright and the hours are fine and it's pretty high-energy, but there is one particular aspect of it that irks me: stocking the 'Baby' section. It's not that the baby section is more challenging to stock than the others, or even that it smells like spilled baby lotion and regret (which it very sincerely does). My ire stems from the absurd array of outlandish baby products that companies and parents seem to feel are essential for the health, well-being, and future virility of their newborn children. The first boxes in the isles are always innocent enough (baby lotion, diaper powder, pacifiers and the like), but as you delve deeper in the stock things just get weirder. This morning I had to locate the baby suntan oil, and as I was moving the product onto the shelf, I couldn't help but imagine what kind of parent would walk into a Target and say to one of the helpful team members, "I need my baby to get a wicked tan. Got anything that could help me out?" Across the isle is the Assorted Diaper Wall. Something I've learned about diapers is that rather than printing in clear and discernible language exactly what that particular type and brand of diaper is meant to be used for (newborns, night-time, play-time, what-have-you), the diaper manufacturers decided it would instead be far funnier to just put pictures of babies doing approximately whatever activity that particular diaper's function caters to. On the right you have the [i]"happy Asian toddler throwing his hands into the air with joy as he shits into a training potty"[/i] brand, and on the left you've got the [i]"Concerned Latin baby inspecting her crotchal region as she pushes a big ball around"[/i] brand of diaper. The customers in the baby isle are often very strange themselves, so maybe the ability to decode this absurd filing method just comes with parenthood. It seems unlikely, though, because customers still very frequently need help discerning whether or not their baby needs shark repellent or a tiny motorcycle, and exactly which happy non-Caucasian-baby-featuring diaper brand is best for their child. They'll hold up a bag of [i]"frightened-looking newborn Indian baby laying motionless on his back"[/i] diapers and ask, "is this kind of diaper okay for my baby?" "Is your baby a newborn?" I'll ask. For some reason, most non-applicable customers recoil from this question and respond in a tone of voice that suggests I'd just accused their baby of being a gangbanger. "What? No! [i](He's just mixed up with a bad crowd!)"[/i] "Alright," I'll say, "You're gonna want to look for the [i]'Bewildered black baby with cornrows staring at something off-camera'[/i] diapers on the top shelf." Once I've put up the last of the baby prom dresses and musical toilet seats, I usually pause to wonder how babies in ancient times ever lived without all this supposedly essential frivolity. Did babies in Ancient Rome grow up with severe physical and mental defects if somebody didn't a strum a lyre while they shat or use the appropriate brand of massage oil when working out the baby's kinks after a long day of toddler-pilates? Maybe I'm picking at the stitches here, but it seems to me that the modern world of child-rearing is entirely too complicated. When I have children, I intend to raise them on a strict diet of breast milk and Diet Dr. Pepper (don't want them getting fat) until they're old enough to hunt their own food or resourceful enough to steal it from other babies.[/QUOTE] The short answer: You live in America [editline]4th May 2011[/editline] Like most governments your government has to make shit for the lowest common denominator. And in America there are 'people' who are starting to successfully cross breed with certain species of vegetable.

[QUOTE=Bran;29606504]Chances are, if a kid 'outgrows' ADHD, they never had it in the first place, and were simply being kids. When I was a kid, everyone in my class had a shitty attention span.[/QUOTE] Which annoys the living daylights outta me because I didn't 'outgrow' it. It fucking matured with me, so now I'm impulsive adult who can't keep my mouth from saying random bullshit that leads to awkward situations. [editline]11th May 2011[/editline] [QUOTE=Jsm;29606551]There seems to be a recent trend (Last 5-10 years IMO) to diagnose kids with every condition under the sun when really the words they are looking for are "they are a child" or "you are a bad parent". IMO this takes away the "value" of a diagnosis, meaning that people who really have ADHD etc do not get the treatment they need.[/QUOTE] FUCKING THANK YOU!

I wish my parents gave me baby shlong enhancement pills. I'm very lonely.

Empty the shelves of suntan oil and put them in the back. Take pictures of people who desperately buy baby suntan oil. :smug:

I think babies are cute :smith:

[QUOTE=Insane516;29574203]why is everything related to a baby creepy to me :smith: ..oh god orange babies :smug: tans :smug: :smug:[/QUOTE] Baby want smush smush.