The Super Friendly Social and Love Advice Thread v2 - General

[QUOTE=Autumn;34434993]unless what? you choose to change your gender from what you were born as? like i said, what does that have to do with anything? what does transexuality have to do with picking up social signs? at all?[/QUOTE] Seith is one of those kind of people who use confidence to act manly and of course to maintain his image of "manliness" he has to put negative connotations on things that would lower this "manliness". So to him a transsexual is a loser and a weirdo who could never have any form of love in his eyes.

[QUOTE=1chains1;34435045]Seith is one of those kind of people who use confidence to act manly and of course to maintain his image of "manliness" he has to put negative connotations on things that would lower this "manliness". So to him a transsexual is a loser and a weirdo who could never have any form of love in his eyes.[/QUOTE] I think you put your own feelings in here, not mine. Now, I used transsexualism because I assumed a man who wants to change to female, would not want to have relationship with another woman. But, I might be wrong, this choice of words was wrong, so you can take it off. I enjoy it when people talk in context and not argue about the semantics of my sentences. I am sure you all (and obviously 1chains1) understood me well enough.

[QUOTE=1chains1;34435045]Seith is one of those kind of people who use confidence to act manly and of course to maintain his image of "manliness" he has to put negative connotations on things that would lower this "manliness". So to him a transsexual is a loser and a weirdo who could never have any form of love in his eyes.[/QUOTE] ahh! you see i thought this was what he was trying to get at. which is why i called him out on it, as i think that's a completely despicable view to have. i can never foresee myself wanting to live my life as the opposite gender, and even though (if i'm truthful) i'm not sure i could even understand such a desire, if somebody wishes to do so then all the best luck to them, they still have my complete respect for them as a person, regardless of how they live their life.

[QUOTE=1chains1;34434495]Uh.. He wasn't saying her accepting the date means she likes him. He was saying to ask her out on a date and see if they click and end up in a relationship, which is kind of how the process works. Well not in your case, but that has to do with you and her not being compatible.[/QUOTE] It had nothing to do with me at all, or her compatablility. She was depressed and had an eating disorder

[QUOTE=Seith;34435127]I think you put your own feelings in here, not mine. Now, I used transsexualism because I assumed a man who wants to change to female, would not want to have relationship with another woman. But, I might be wrong, this choice of words was wrong, so you can take it off. I enjoy it when people talk in context and not argue about the semantics of my sentences. I am sure you all (and obviously 1chains1) understood me well enough.[/QUOTE] First off why would you say I was putting my own feelings in there when I have not mentioned transsexuals once lol? Secondly, people obviously did not understand you well enough because even Autumn thought the exact same thing as me. It was badly worded and vague, so we viewed it as a completely different (and bigoted) statement. edit- Redbadger we weren't talking about you but juice layer's situation? And having depression and an eating disorder is compatibility issues as it obviously kept yall apart.

[QUOTE=1chains1;34434978]If she is shaken by it she will probably distance herself because she doesn't want you to advance on her again. It messes up a friendship and he still wants that friendship if she doesn't like him as he stated. Also again everyone is different, I have a friend who is very flirty and loves touching such as leaning on people and holding their arms and other such things but she is not pursuing a relationship. Different people have different comfort zones and different standards on what is relationship actions and what are friendship actions. The only "sign" he saw was her bumping into him while a vehicle is moving. You suggested to simply go in for a kiss for something that could be seen either way as a sign. Even if she was giving a sign she may only simply be showing interest and rushing in with a kiss could be going too fast for her. People also have different opinions on what is too soon, a kiss might be a simple action for you but for all you know she could view it as no one should kiss until after the 2nd date. There are too many variables to be brash and just taking it one step at a time is the best way to go about in the situations. Now it doesn't mean to be insecure and not take action when action is needed, but right now he is in a situation where there is potential for a relationship but it is only beginning to take shape. During this time you have to show interest by taking them to dates and making it obvious, but showing caution in how bold your actions are until you know she is comfortable.[/QUOTE] If she is shaken, then what's the point when he obviously wants to be more than friends? This is the epitome of friendzones. It has become popular and normalized than it should be. There are no (almost none really true in essence) male to female interactions that do not have any sexual orientation(either from start or later on in the interaction between the two). Though, I agree. He might want to approach this a bit more easily, but then again.... (read above) Being flirty is another approach women to have experience tend to do (teaser or players). There will be signs, we got that already. It doesn't matter if they might be irrelevant because she's either a player or a teaser. There are no set rules. "3rd date is ok to have sex" "1 date at least before kiss" all of these are simple rules to allow women to not feel slutty. There are no set of rules, I will say this again. There's attraction and building comfort. If you can pull it off right, 8 out of 10, you will get what you want. I am sorry if I came off as "smash your lips into hers" but that's not what I meant. I meant he should stop being afraid, go after what he wants. Be more firm, more goal driven. I agree with the last paragraph in correlation to his situation.

Jesus Christ guys chill your beans, I think we can agree throwing transexual in to a list of criteria for being bad at reading signs was thoughtless, but I don't think it was a calculated attack on transexuals. It is a despicable view to have on transexuals, but I honestly don't think it was meant that way. A lot of Seith's sentences aren't well put (sorry Seith, I mean nothing by it!) and it's reasonable to assume he isn't a massive tranny basher. If I'm wrong my bad, you can call me a good natured naive twatbag of a man. Anyway, I was watching this show on ITV (a TV channel in the UK) called Take Me Out. It's a dating show. I've just been introduced to it and it's literally the best thing. The idea is they have 30 women and a man comes down and based on a series of questions and information about the guy, they all either remain interested or go off him. At the end there's usually two people left still interested and the guy has to pick, and then they go to an island! Sometimes there's no women left and the man has to walk off, alone. And that's the second best thing. [B]QUESTION: Would any of you ever go on a national tv dating show / speed dating somewhere / on a blind date? And why?[/B] I definitely would, just putting it out there, it seems like great fun. I mean on this tv show the women don't really seem my type but fuck it, free holiday!

[QUOTE=1chains1;34435206]First off why would you say I was putting my own feelings in there when I have not mentioned transsexuals once lol? Secondly, people obviously did not understand you well enough because even Autumn thought the exact same thing as me. It was badly worded and vague, so we viewed it as a completely different (and bigoted) statement. edit- Redbadger we weren't talking about you but juice layer's situation? And having depression and an eating disorder is compatibility issues as it obviously kept yall apart.[/QUOTE] And yet, you were capable of commenting perfectly in context. You understood me. As I've said above, people tend to look for what's wrong with my comments, not what's good. "Trans-sexuality" was given with two more examples, so I think it was clear enough about my intentions(which obviously weren't trans bashing). Semantics are just a way to diver from the subject I was really aiming at.

[QUOTE=Seith;34435437]And yet, you were capable of commenting perfectly in context. You understood me. As I've said above, people tend to look for what's wrong with my comments, not what's good. "Trans-sexuality" was given with two more examples, so I think it was clear enough about my intentions(which obviously weren't trans bashing). Semantics are just a way to diver from the subject I was really aiming at.[/QUOTE] If I understood you then I was correct. But either way I doubt Autumn who started the subject on you mentioning transsexualism would want to divert (not diver) from the subject as she wasn't even involved in the argument. nice try though.

[QUOTE=JenkinsJ;34435398]Jesus Christ guys chill your beans, I think we can agree throwing transexual in to a list of criteria for being bad at reading signs was thoughtless, but I don't think it was a calculated attack on transexuals. It is a despicable view to have on transexuals, but I honestly don't think it was meant that way. A lot of Seith's sentences aren't well put (sorry Seith, I mean nothing by it!) and it's reasonable to assume he isn't a massive tranny basher. If I'm wrong my bad, you can call me a good natured naive twatbag of a man. Anyway, I was watching this show on ITV (a TV channel in the UK) called Take Me Out. It's a dating show. I've just been introduced to it and it's literally the best thing. The idea is they have 30 women and a man comes down and based on a series of questions and information about the guy, they all either remain interested or go off him. At the end there's usually two people left still interested and the guy has to pick, and then they go to an island! Sometimes there's no women left and the man has to walk off, alone. And that's the second best thing. [B]QUESTION: Would any of you ever go on a national tv dating show / speed dating somewhere / on a blind date? And why?[/B] I definitely would, just putting it out there, it seems like great fun. I mean on this tv show the women don't really seem my type but fuck it, free holiday![/QUOTE] Do what feels right. [editline]28th January 2012[/editline] [QUOTE=1chains1;34435556]If I understood you then I was correct. But either way I doubt Autumn who started the subject on you mentioning transsexualism would want to divert (not diver) from the subject as she wasn't even involved in the argument. nice try though.[/QUOTE] Good thing to each his own opinion...

[QUOTE=Seith;34435581]Do what feels right. [editline]28th January 2012[/editline] Good thing to each his own opinion...[/QUOTE] You can have an opinion just make sure it is well formed next time and you won't run into this kind of situation. Unless youre into pointless arguments.

[QUOTE=1chains1;34435616]You can have an opinion just make sure it is well formed next time and you won't run into this kind of situation. Unless youre into pointless arguments.[/QUOTE] ... Bizzare.

[QUOTE=Seith;34435581]Do what feels right.[/QUOTE] I wasn't asking for advice I was asking if anyone here would do that sort of trashy dating show, or go and blind dates! I wanna hear what people think it'll be good! What about you what would you do? I bet no one's going to even entertain the idea of answering and I'll look like a spastic.

[QUOTE=JenkinsJ;34436430]I wasn't asking for advice I was asking if anyone here would do that sort of trashy dating show, or go and blind dates! I wanna hear what people think it'll be good! What about you what would you do? I bet no one's going to even entertain the idea of answering and I'll look like a spastic.[/QUOTE] I wouldn't waste my time, unless you love cameras in your face.

[QUOTE=JenkinsJ;34436430]I wasn't asking for advice I was asking if anyone here would do that sort of trashy dating show, or go and blind dates! I wanna hear what people think it'll be good! What about you what would you do? I bet no one's going to even entertain the idea of answering and I'll look like a spastic.[/QUOTE] sounds about right hell i would though

[QUOTE=JenkinsJ;34435398] [B]QUESTION: Would any of you ever go on a national tv dating show / speed dating somewhere / on a blind date? And why?[/B] I definitely would, just putting it out there, it seems like great fun. I mean on this tv show the women don't really seem my type but fuck it, free holiday![/QUOTE] I would. Not to find a partner or even someone to just spend the night with, but purely for the fun of meeting new people. I love learning about people and would happily have hundreds of friends if it wasn't a pain to maintain each one.

Man, why is it so hard to get over a girl you know doesn't have interest in you? You don't know for sure, cause you don't ask her but you can feel it.. but for some reason you keep clinging to hope she'll see something good in you and change her mind and attitude. Feels bad man, I gotta get over her and move on, which I wish wasn't so tough.

[QUOTE=lum1naire;34442438]Man, why is it so hard to get over a girl you know doesn't have interest in you? You don't know for sure, cause you don't ask her but you can feel it.. but for some reason you keep clinging to hope she'll see something good in you and change her mind and attitude. Feels bad man, I gotta get over her and move on, which I wish wasn't so tough.[/QUOTE] [media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ml8KDumTO0[/media]

[QUOTE=Little Green;34425169]Somewhat related, I was in the same boat about a year ago. I ended up asking this girl out a week before study break, exams etc. We had a good time, but I got the feeling that she wasn't really interested in the same way. I would have pursued it further, but it was kind of awkward timing and we couldn't really have done anything for another three weeks, so for whatever reason I didn't follow up on the first date... Would it be a bad idea to try again? I could call her, but because I haven't really seen her that much recently I would feel like I'd be putting her on the spot. Otherwise I could wait a month until we both go back to uni and try sometime then.[/QUOTE] Sorry to ask again, but has anyone ever asked someone out, kind of left it, then felt like trying again much later? Ha... I'm kind of annoyed at myself for giving up as early as I did / still being so attracted to her. Better to leave it and move on?

[QUOTE=lum1naire;34442438]Man, why is it so hard to get over a girl you know doesn't have interest in you? You don't know for sure, cause you don't ask her but you can feel it.. but for some reason you keep clinging to hope she'll see something good in you and change her mind and attitude. Feels bad man, I gotta get over her and move on, which I wish wasn't so tough.[/QUOTE] I feel the same way bro

[QUOTE=Little Green;34445531]Sorry to ask again, but has anyone ever asked someone out, kind of left it, then felt like trying again much later? Ha... I'm kind of annoyed at myself for giving up as early as I did / still being so attracted to her. Better to leave it and move on?[/QUOTE] Depends how long

[QUOTE=killerteacup;34445650]Depends how long[/QUOTE] I am not sure what's going on. You asked her, left her with that information and never asked again?

[QUOTE=Seith;34445692]I am not sure what's going on. You asked her, left her with that information and never asked again?[/QUOTE] umm, I'm not the one who has been put in this situation, you're looking for the guy I quoted, not me. As for me, I took it to mean, have asked, but it never really worked out, now he wants to see if he can pick it up again, to which I said it depends on how long ago it not working out was, and probably also how close they are

[QUOTE=killerteacup;34446023]umm, I'm not the one who has been put in this situation, you're looking for the guy I quoted, not me. As for me, I took it to mean, have asked, but it never really worked out, now he wants to see if he can pick it up again, to which I said it depends on how long ago it not working out was, and probably also how close they are[/QUOTE] I see. I'd say leave it, unless he became capable with women in those past month..

Right, so last night me and my ex hung out and I get the feeling she still has feelings for me. Just something about her, I can't describe it but I am for certain that she still cares about me and they way we would make eye contact just felt right. It's hard to explain. We went on a 3 hour drive around the city, got really physical as well and her body was hot to the touch like it would be during our dates in the past. I carried her across a park and basically we just acted like we were still dating. And then she didn't want to go home and kept saying in 30 mins, and then when I got outside her house we just sat there in the car talking for half an hour. Afterwards, kept texting me saying how she had a great time and wants to do it again and we have been texting all day today. I thought my feelings for her had gone but after yesterday...I can for certain say that I still have feelings for her. I don't know what to do, don't know if she still likes me that way...but I am certain she still cares about me, in which way I have no idea. Does she still have feelings for me? Or does she not and we are actually just 'friends'? Oh yeah, we broke up 6 months ago, It was me that ended it with her...

I'd say move on. You broke up with her once, it will happen again. Even though this feels extremely seducing, I'd say avoid it. Move on, disregard everything that happened last night.

[QUOTE=Little Green;34445531]Sorry to ask again, but has anyone ever asked someone out, kind of left it, then felt like trying again much later? Ha... I'm kind of annoyed at myself for giving up as early as I did / still being so attracted to her. Better to leave it and move on?[/QUOTE] it might be worth messaging her on facebook or something - a text message is less immediate since she can take her time replying to it. whatever happens, as long as you're charming and polite (and stop right away if she's not interested), I don't think you have the capacity to really fuck it up, whatever you do ([B]if a girl likes you, it won't matter how or when you ask her[/B]) however, if you guys didn't keep any kind of correspondence afterwards, my advice would be to leave it and move on. but really, I wanted to reply to you because your avatar is all kinds of rad. :v:

[QUOTE=Astronaut491;34446901]Right, so last night me and my ex hung out and I get the feeling she still has feelings for me. Just something about her, I can't describe it but I am for certain that she still cares about me and they way we would make eye contact just felt right. It's hard to explain. We went on a 3 hour drive around the city, got really physical as well and her body was hot to the touch like it would be during our dates in the past. I carried her across a park and basically we just acted like we were still dating. And then she didn't want to go home and kept saying in 30 mins, and then when I got outside her house we just sat there in the car talking for half an hour. Afterwards, kept texting me saying how she had a great time and wants to do it again and we have been texting all day today. I thought my feelings for her had gone but after yesterday...I can for certain say that I still have feelings for her. I don't know what to do, don't know if she still likes me that way...but I am certain she still cares about me, in which way I have no idea. Does she still have feelings for me? Or does she not and we are actually just 'friends'? Oh yeah, we broke up 6 months ago, It was me that ended it with her...[/QUOTE] What exactly happened to break you guys up?

[QUOTE='[CWG]RustySpannerz;34447832']What exactly happened to break you guys up?[/QUOTE] We just went through a bad week which involved her ex trying to get back with her which had an effect on her and she started showing mixed feelings...There was a lot more to it but I'd rather not discuss but it was me being over-protective more than anything that ended it between us. Anyway, I let her go because I felt she didn't want to be with me anymore...she didnt go back to her ex after. Yesterday we got on so well, as if nothing bad had happened between us. She even gave me her jacket when I said it was cold...I put it on as a joke but then gave it back immediately as she was shivering. I had to tell her she should go home otherwise we would have probably sat in the car for an hour outside hers.

[QUOTE=Astronaut491;34448557]We just went through a bad week which involved her ex trying to get back with her which had an effect on her and she started showing mixed feelings...There was a lot more to it but I'd rather not discuss but it was me being over-protective more than anything that ended it between us. Anyway, I let her go because I felt she didn't want to be with me anymore...she didnt go back to her ex after. Yesterday we got on so well, as if nothing bad had happened between us. She even gave me her jacket when I said it was cold...I put it on as a joke but then gave it back immediately as she was shivering. I had to tell her she should go home otherwise we would have probably sat in the car for an hour outside hers.[/QUOTE] If it really was just a bad week you should think about getting back with her, if its something more intergrally wrong with the relationship then I'd steer clear if I were you. But the important thing is to do what will make you both happy, not to please her alone or yourself alone.