Crossdressing & Transgender & A̲L̲L̲I̲E̲S̲ Discussion v. Thread Reassignment Surgery - General

[QUOTE=Clovis;52462949]depends on the way your face looks, if i get the wrong angle it looks like i have a deformed mouth lmao[/QUOTE] Hey I'd take a weird looking mouth over a dopey expression (mine) :<

had a seriously bad anxiety attack the other day due to fears of transition moving too fast. I was trying to find a good time to come out to my work colleagues and everything kind of overwhelmed me and I was freaking out about my (small, still very hideable) boobs. I got that feeling of "in too deep" and extreme panic that I had years ago when I ordered a dress online. it doesn't help that almost nobody in real life calls me by my preferred name or uses correct pronouns. I was trying to come out to my work colleagues all week but couldn't find the right moment, so that was another sustained stress. I swore up and down I was ready for this but I just wasn't. I can't tell whether my feelings are real or I'm just making shit up constantly due to eighteen layers of anxiety. I feel so fucking stupid. it's not like I went into this on a whim, I had counselling sessions before I did it, things felt a lot more hopeful on HRT and I like what it's done for my appearance so far, but I can't shake the feeling I could have done things a lot differently. I'm going to stop HRT until I have calmed down and sorted myself out (and gone through everything with the therapist again).

yeah. as I said I'm going to quit the estrogen for a bit (after asking my doctor, obviously - I know it can cause hot flushes and what have you if you instantly stop instead of tapering down, and I'm aware that you shouldn't be running with no sex hormones for prolonged periods of time). ugh, I swear HRT-as-diagnosis is complete nonsense. in slightly better news (if that can be said), I went to my first support group a couple of weeks ago and met some trans folks IRL for the first time. it was lovely and a few of us went out to a bar afterwards. I'm going to try to do that every month [editline]13th July 2017[/editline] oh I already posted that. fuck farts [editline]13th July 2017[/editline] christ I've repeated myself twice in the last two posts, am I losing my memory or what? [editline]13th July 2017[/editline] now I truly understand what it means to be a trans woman - to want to live your life, day to day, as a woman, to the fullest extent possible. if you want to do that, then transition is right for you. if not, then don't (yet). ultimately it's as simple as that. what I need to do now is figure out exactly whether I do want that or whether I want something else. I guess I'll keep trying things out, and keep experimenting, and see what feels right, but will also try to keep analysing to a minimum, because that kills the feelings. and I think I'm just going to tell my colleagues and supervisor, because the pressure of keeping this secret has far outweighed "not being ready". far better to be completely open about this instead of constantly hiding from everyone. I am pretty sure people will be fine about it (academic setting).

Wish you all the luck, I've had my own feelings of doubt but after a good nap and a night of chilling out I usually calm down, panic attacks fucking blow hope you feel better soon :c

Congrats yo!

[QUOTE=Kiwi;52481085]Finally got my letter. :toot:[/QUOTE] Been sat on mine for a while. [t]http://horobox.co.uk/u/reag/2017-07-22_00-33-31.jpg[/t] September gonna be busy, starting college again and this.

grats to both of you <3

I finally came out to my mom a few days ago. Nothing bad has happened yet so I guess it was successful.

[QUOTE=Reagy;52494073]Been sat on mine for a while. [t]http://horobox.co.uk/u/reag/2017-07-22_00-33-31.jpg[/t] September gonna be busy, starting college again and this.[/QUOTE] O cool, you're going to the same center I am, I think i'm seeing Helen on the same day too :v:

Hi everyone. Not sure how to formulate this, hum basically I would like to have some information about transgenders. I'm a 19yo guy, I'm not myself into transitioning or even interested in doing so, but the last year I got interested in the subject (after watching some porn and talked with a few friends). You could say that I find "dickgirls" really attractive. I never met a transgender, and asking those questions directly probably isn't a good idea. As FP is such an open community, I thought I could ask here. Please keep in mind that I respect everyone. As a non native English speaker, my vocabulary might be offensive without me knowing. Please tell me if a word is misused or offensive. 1. Is there a difference between what we call "dickgirls" and "visually female" transgender ? 2. Personally, I smell a huge difference between male and females. Does the intake of hormones counter your original malish smell in favour of a feminine smell, or reverse from female to male ? 3. Females that stay females (in appearance, behaviour) but have surgery to change their sex, how do you call that kind of transition ? 4. How long can it take to achieve a transition ? 5. On average, are transgenders well supported by friends or family ? Are there associations or communities, or places where you can have support, help and meet other people ? Sorry for the awkwardness of my questions, first time really talking about the subject.

Could you also post a chart for FTM as well? I would search for myself but I assume that you and other regulars know better sources than I do.

[QUOTE=gtanoofa;52498975]Hihi. I'll try to answer your questions in the best way i can. The word "transgender" is an adjective and not a noun btw so you'd say "a transgender individual" not "a transgender" No, but trans people and especially mtfs usually find the term "dickgirl" very offensive. yes. The sexual hormones inside your body change the way your body works including your smell and thus would make a male to female transperson who is on hrt(hormone replacement therapy) to change as their identifying gender. Same goes for female to male transpeople who are on androgenic hormones. You mean female to male transexuals who get surgery to minimize their breast size and also get a phaloplasty so that they get genitals that resemble that of males? If so then they would be considered males who have a feminine expression. Your biological sex and gender(mine is biologically male and my gender is female) doesn't really have to do with how you express yourself in terms of clothing or behavior, although a lot of binary transpeople would dismiss that person as a "trender" and not "trutrans" which i find wrong personally, but what can you do. Depends what you define as transition. Some people want to keep their genitals for various reasons and don't want to get a sex reassignment surgery. Some others want facial feminization surgery. Every transperson has a different definition of transition. If we're talking about hormones and ignore whatever surgery there is then i'd say 5 years for a complete hormonal transition, although every individual is different so expect to see people who have completed their transition a year or 2 in in terms of self fulfillment. There is a chart in the first page on what hormones do if you want to see for yourself. Depends on where a trans person lives in. Some places are good and some are not good. Personally only my mother, father, sister, uncle know about my transition from my family and i'm pretty scared of coming out to others as well. We do have a support organization in my city, but i am really shy and scared of being open about being trans and choose not to participate in lgbt marches and other sorts of lgbt support stuff. UPDATE: Didn't find the hormone chart thing so here you go. [t]http://i.imgur.com/MN5MYrW.png[/t][/QUOTE] Thank you for the quick reply. By 3. I meant people born female as gender and sex, that become female as gender, male as sex (not necessarily including breast reduction) Reading the given chart, am I to understand that mtf transition get rid of your erection abilities and reduce your libido ? Or can you choose specific symptoms, for example All exept genitals changes ? Are there some negative secondary effects that may cause trouble during a transition ? I mean reaction to hormones, psychological troubles such as depression etc.. ?

What does "orgasms get stronger" mean? Shooting out with more force, more mass or more like how crippling they are in the moment (sensitivity)

[QUOTE=pHLucy;52498890]O cool, you're going to the same center I am, I think i'm seeing Helen on the same day too :v:[/QUOTE] Neat, Helen's really nice if this is your first time meeting her. I've still gotta see if I can even get there at 12 due to trains and even if work wont be shits about it.

Do you lose some sensitivity as well in those parts as they shrink ?

[QUOTE=Eirheinger;52499979]Do you lose some sensitivity as well in those parts as they shrink ?[/QUOTE] Quite a bit actually. It's not 0, but its very diminished.

I just had a thought. At first it seems ironic that people change their sex, but their libido decreases during the process. (Which seems to completely ruin the interest of changing sex) Actually people wanna change their gender. In French, there's no word for transgender (or I never heard of it), it's just transexuality. As a result, I always thought that sexuality was the key factor, when actually it isn't (surely it's important but not the only thing). Another misleading thing are the english words male and female. People seem to use them the same way as man and woman. In French male and female are biological terms common to all species, so I misused and misunderstood them. A bit confusing, I always thought I understood it right.

i heard it was like a 50/50 chance of gaining or losing sensitivity either that or you gain sensitivity in other places so it evens out

Good news is that I got a new Endo that actually lives in my hometown, bad news is that im going without HRT for four months until the first appointment, and im already feeling pretty shitty, like my blood isn't my own I don't know if im going to be able to handle it, bluhh

With the recent news of trump banning transgender folk from the military, ive been caught in a lot of discussions about it, particularly with quite a few people calling transgenderism a "mental condition" and that transgender people have no place in the military. As a nontransgender person, how do I respond to this? Sorry if this question was already asked

There's nothing more crushing then when you start taking steps to appear more like a girl to then have a forced boy haircut put upon you. :wavey:

Cross posting I guess? [QUOTE=Pascall;52507794]I think the reason I've been ducking out of relationships before they get too serious for the last few years is that I'm realizing that I'm kind of confused about my gender identity. I've got a 100% female body but I'd say I feel like a guy maybe like 75-80% of the time. But I'm still okay with my female features??? Being into both guys and girls and not being into sex in the least doesn't make it easier. I feel like I'm this complicated plethora of feelings and it's only getting harder to discern what I want and what I want to be. Probably explains a lot tbh. I guess there's not a whole lot I can do besides take it day by day and see if I can figure it out.[/QUOTE]

dysphoria is a mental health condition I guess but honestly they're trying to make it seem like something like schizophrenia but I'm pretty sure you can live a normal life with schizophrenia assuming you haven't been pushed away and alienated further When I see shit like this I just chop it up to ignorance, I'd maybe ask for them to back that up, what would be the correct way to deal with transgenderism and how would one be "cured" of it if they where to be diagnosed with it, they'll probably go onto quote an anti-psychotic drug called "primozide" or someshit that was used on literally one person and they stopped showing signs of being trans but they had also been diagnosed with schizophrenia It always amazes me how scared and offended people get at the idea of someone wanting to live life in a different harmless manner than someone else, like how boring is your life that you HAVE to get up in arms about a biologically born male, dressing and acting as a female in order to love themselves?

[QUOTE=Lollipoopdeck;52508924]dysphoria is a mental health condition I guess but honestly they're trying to make it seem like something like schizophrenia but I'm pretty sure you can live a normal life with schizophrenia assuming you haven't been pushed away and alienated further When I see shit like this I just chop it up to ignorance, I'd maybe ask for them to back that up, what would be the correct way to deal with transgenderism and how would one be "cured" of it if they where to be diagnosed with it, they'll probably go onto quote an anti-psychotic drug called "primozide" or someshit that was used on literally one person and they stopped showing signs of being trans but they had also been diagnosed with schizophrenia It always amazes me how scared and offended people get at the idea of someone wanting to live life in a different harmless manner than someone else, like how boring is your life that you HAVE to get up in arms about a biologically born male, dressing and acting as a female in order to love themselves?[/QUOTE] thanks lad

[QUOTE=The golden;52509124]I'm kinda in the same boat. Or rather, I was. I'm lesbian but I do not wish to partake in sex at all. I call myself a grey-ace and identify as female but for awhile thought some lingering masculine feelings meant that I might not be a transwoman but rather demi-fem or genderfluid. I started to tell people this and went along with it to see how it felt and I really disliked it. It felt like I wasn't being honest with myself... anything masculine that remained was simply because I was in denial and/or embarrassed to get rid of them - I didn't actually want them. So now I'm back to going full-fem and I'm happy again. So I guess my suggestion to you is to try and experiment a little. See what is comfortable and uncomfortable to you. That way you have a very solid list of "Yeah, I like this" and "No, screw that" for you to work with when trying to figure out your identity.[/QUOTE] I feel like I'm pretty strictly asexual. My last boyfriend [I]seemed[/I] okay with that but he would take a mile every time I talked about maybe trying it. Started making jokes about anal and oral sex and he was super excessive about it which lead me to believe that no, he wouldn't really be okay with not having sex. So it sufficiently spooked me to the point where I felt like I had to break up with him. Along with other reasons. I shouldn't really have to convince myself to "try" it if I really don't want to. And I had to talk to a friend who reassured me of that. If I seriously want to try it, I'll try it but I don't need to use it as a tool to keep someone interested in me. But anyway. I would experiment more with gender expression if I could but I live in South Texas with a conservative Republican Christian family so I'll have to wait to do anything more open until I move out on my own. I plan on cutting my hair short (which is a huge taboo for women in my family and in Hispanic/Latino culture in general I think...) and buying lots more masculine clothing. Right now I do a lot of my shopping in the men's section but I still hesitate a lot when it comes to certain things because of how my family will perceive me. But I'm hoping once I can go start my life on my own, I'll have the courage to really get out there and explore more.

[QUOTE=Pascall;52509695]I plan on cutting my hair short (which is a huge taboo for women in my family and in Hispanic/Latino culture in general I think[/QUOTE] Surprisingly, I know some guys that actually find shorthaired women more feminine than long haired ones. IMO it's true that cutting off the hair let facial expressions and feminine subtle movements be more obvious and appreciated. The smallest movement is magnified, especially with extrashort hair/none.

for sake

[QUOTE=Pascall;52509695] I plan on cutting my hair short (which is[B] a huge taboo for women in my family and in [/B][B]Hispanic/Latino culture[/B] in general I think...) [/QUOTE] Speaking from a Hispanic family, my mother dislikes short hair. My mother was against the idea of me getting a pixie hair cut years ago. She kept arguing with my Father that she didn't want me to look like a man but my Father didn't see any harm in getting a haircut. I got my pixie cut and I looked damn cute. I kept my hair short for 3 years and now I feel like growing my hair long again.

I don't really want a pixie cut, I want something more androgynous but yeah. Most of the backlash is from my mom and sister who try to convince me to not wear anything that'd "make you look like a boy". But idk I wouldn't mind someone mistaking me for a dude. Being called "sir" would be cool sometimes.

[QUOTE=The golden;52510419]If you do go for a haircut, it might be worth looking for stylists in your area that are LGBT friendly. They'd be more likely to understand what it is you wish to have done instead of just doing what they think you [I]should [/I]have. I've heard some worrying stories of hair stylists not listening to what the person wanted because the stylist gendered them wrong and assumed they wanted something else.[/QUOTE] Regarding trans-friendly hair stylists, sign up for [url=http://www.safeinmychair.com/]Safe in My Chair[/url] when it comes back up. I found my girlfriend a trans-friendly stylist that was local, and she did an absolutely amazing job, her and the the whole salon loved her, what she was doing with her hair, and were getting all excited and gushing about it. And she did a [i]damned[/i] fine job with her hair. And to touch on the fact that the page is just an open letter - basically what happened is that the lady who started the project and a few other people in the administration were being exploitative and the people in the movement following her did not agree with her and her actions, and have essentially taken over the campaign and are trying to reform the group and do it right.