Crossdressing & Transgender & A̲L̲L̲I̲E̲S̲ Discussion v. Thread Reassignment Surgery - General

'Little while ago, an internet "friend" of mine who I'm only out to as FtM told me that he likes me, then followed that up with "I guess that makes me pansexual since I like trans boys too" which, to me, sounds like he was implying that trans boys aren't actually boys. He's also enbyphobic, which is is why him saying that instead of "I guess that makes me bi" or something sounds like he was implying trans boys ain't boys. Most people I've seen who only believe in two genders usually shit on someone when they say they're pan. Obviously, I told him that I don't like him back, but I can't stop thinking about that. It keeps bugging me.

[QUOTE=Butthurter;53125702]youre better off not entrusting a guy like that with personal details again, he sounds like the kinda guy who is only interested in labeling things he likes? idk[/QUOTE] The only reason that guy knows I'm trans is that he knew me about half a year or so before I realised that I'm trans, IIRC. Otherwise I probably wouldn't have told him.

sounds like the guy's possibly a chaser as well. definitely a creep

Chasers are absolutely disgusting, I hate them so much [editline]12th February 2018[/editline] Chasers are why I'm so apprehensive about joining any trans communities, nearly every community I've encountered has been infested with them and it doesn't feel safe at all.

If anybody knows of any positive trans communities without a chaser infestation let me know. I'm trying my best to not feel alone.

Sorry out of the loop, what's a chaser in this context?

What kind of qualities separate a chaser from someone who's just into pre-op/non-op? Are they only the chaser if they're toxic and do things like try to persuade someone to not go through with their operation and plans n such?

So basically pigs/creeps with a type? One time I told a friend I was thinking of experimenting and he suggested I'm a chaser and I just took him at his word because I'd never heard the name before, and he assured me it wasn't negative. Because of that when I've read animosity about chasers I've gotten nervous unsure if I fall under the criteria. I'm getting the sense they were using the word wrong now. I just wanted to be sure. I don't think they were doing it on purpose since they knew I was supportive of my friend not only wanting SRS but also hoping to one day be able to give birth. I generally avoid sexual interaction period due to a mix of germaphobia and being uneased by it from past experiences.

If someone fetishizes trans people and singles them out to directly pursue them, they're a chaser and that's creepy. It's the same as fetishizing race or whatever, like going after Asian girls for example.

Hello friends, I'm not sure who else to turn to with this situation, as a lot of friends don't really deal with this sort of transgender kind of thing, so I hope you guys can help me out. For background, I'm a volunteer teacher in one of Chicago's biggest mosques. I do Arabic lessons, Islamic history, Qu'ran teachings, and a variety of other aspects of Muslim knowledge and livelihood. I only do it Fridays later in the evening (especially because of my heavy workload in my actual job), and the majority of children I teach are from ages 9 to 14. They're all great kids that seem very bright and intelligent, and they trust me a whole ton. I love helping out in mosque, especially since it gives a greater sense of community to me, but as you all probably know, the Islamic community is obviously conservative in a greater picture. The mosque I volunteer at does veer a little bit to the more liberal side socially (since it's in Chicago), but there's still a rather strong conservative outlook. Last Friday, there had been a girl (let's call her Fatima) around the age 13 that had walked up to me after-class. She seemed pretty troubled and was pale in the face, so I closed the door and asked her what was up. At first, she was afraid to tell me what she was stricken about, and was kinda going around her answers. She finally explained to me that she thinks that she doesn't "feel like a girl". I asked Fatima if she asked her parents or other imams about this, and she said no (thankfully). She's always been rather tom-boyish in terms of her appearance and mannerisms (always played soccer and football with the other boys rather than talk to the girls/stay with her parents during events, for instance), but I never thought Fatima would be questioning her gender. I then asked her if she's heard of transgenderism and gender dysphoria, and she said that she knows about it through the news and Internet. I told her to be careful with researching it, and abstain from letting her parents know yet (they're very conservative, even compared to other Muslim parents in the mosque at least). Fatima remarked that she feels strongly towards being male, and didn't really like being a girl. She's felt like this since forever, or at least that's what she said. Here's what I need help with. I want to help this child out, because she's an amazing, intelligent, funny student of mine, and I don't want her going through this alone. I don't know if it's a phase, I don't know if she's seriously entering a dysphoric state or not. I'm not well-versed in this manner (I have gay friends, but I don't think I've ever interacted with transgendered people to any extent). I feel that she's too young to be researching this kind of stuff online by herself, and without her parents' backing, I can't just let her do anything she wants. I want her to know that there's at least one adult out there having her back, especially in this climate. However, I don't want to be too intrusive, especially since she's only 13, and I don't want to put undue influence upon her. For now, I told her that we'll have personal, weekly talks after class about what she might potentially be going through, but I'm not sure about anything else. How should I go about this? Thanks everyone, and have a good day!

[QUOTE=Omilinon;53127385]...For background, I'm a volunteer teacher in one of Chicago's...[/QUOTE]Finally a question I can help out with! For support, I highly recommend the [url=http://www.centeronhalsted.org/]Center on Halsted[/url] and [url=https://howardbrown.org/programs-services/transgender-health/]Howard Brown[/url] for any medical (hormones) needs. Contacting the Center on Halsted would be a good first step and can most likely help facilitate a productive discussion along with supporting resources. Hopefully, it isn't too difficult for either of you to get into the city but if you/they need help navigating the public transit I can happily provide more detailed directions.

I Stole My Dads Viagra Will It Help? [highlight](User was banned for this post ("Shit Posting" - UncleJimmema))[/highlight] [highlight](User was permabanned for this post ("It's forever" - UncleJimmema))[/highlight]

-removed- If this is a serious question, I can't think of anything it could possibly help with. Can I ask for more context?

Ban history gives all the context you could need

I'm not going to judge someone based on their ban history from three or eight years ago, my much more recent ban history is godawful. [editline]12th February 2018[/editline] but yeah probably not a legit question

[QUOTE=AtomicSans;53127724]I'm not going to judge someone based on their ban history from three or eight years ago, my much more recent ban history is godawful. [editline]12th February 2018[/editline] but yeah probably not a legit question[/QUOTE] Looking at their post history would be a better idea. Other than a post 5 days ago today is the first day they've posted since 2014 and other than a post about drugs (dunno enough about that to say whether that one's a shitpost or not) the rest are clearly no-effort shitposts.

[QUOTE=AtomicSans;53127710]If this is a serious question, I can't think of anything it could possibly help with. Can I ask for more context?[/QUOTE] why are you even bothering

[QUOTE=Craptasket;53128870]why are you even bothering[/QUOTE] I don't check post histories. From my perspective it seemed like it could have been a very confused kid asking a question.

Hey, you might as well give the benefit of the doubt when it comes to topics like this.

There's giving the benefit of the doubt and then there's being naivé. You should never go too far with being nice to the point where you let yourself get walked all over. [QUOTE=Omilinon;53127385]Hello friends, I'm not sure who else to turn to with this situation, as a lot of friends don't really deal with this sort of transgender kind of thing, so I hope you guys can help me out. For background, I'm a volunteer teacher in one of Chicago's biggest mosques. I do Arabic lessons, Islamic history, Qu'ran teachings, and a variety of other aspects of Muslim knowledge and livelihood. I only do it Fridays later in the evening (especially because of my heavy workload in my actual job), and the majority of children I teach are from ages 9 to 14. They're all great kids that seem very bright and intelligent, and they trust me a whole ton. I love helping out in mosque, especially since it gives a greater sense of community to me, but as you all probably know, the Islamic community is obviously conservative in a greater picture. The mosque I volunteer at does veer a little bit to the more liberal side socially (since it's in Chicago), but there's still a rather strong conservative outlook. Last Friday, there had been a girl (let's call her Fatima) around the age 13 that had walked up to me after-class. She seemed pretty troubled and was pale in the face, so I closed the door and asked her what was up. At first, she was afraid to tell me what she was stricken about, and was kinda going around her answers. She finally explained to me that she thinks that she doesn't "feel like a girl". I asked Fatima if she asked her parents or other imams about this, and she said no (thankfully). She's always been rather tom-boyish in terms of her appearance and mannerisms (always played soccer and football with the other boys rather than talk to the girls/stay with her parents during events, for instance), but I never thought Fatima would be questioning her gender. I then asked her if she's heard of transgenderism and gender dysphoria, and she said that she knows about it through the news and Internet. I told her to be careful with researching it, and abstain from letting her parents know yet (they're very conservative, even compared to other Muslim parents in the mosque at least). Fatima remarked that she feels strongly towards being male, and didn't really like being a girl. She's felt like this since forever, or at least that's what she said. Here's what I need help with. I want to help this child out, because she's an amazing, intelligent, funny student of mine, and I don't want her going through this alone. I don't know if it's a phase, I don't know if she's seriously entering a dysphoric state or not. I'm not well-versed in this manner (I have gay friends, but I don't think I've ever interacted with transgendered people to any extent). I feel that she's too young to be researching this kind of stuff online by herself, and without her parents' backing, I can't just let her do anything she wants. I want her to know that there's at least one adult out there having her back, especially in this climate. However, I don't want to be too intrusive, especially since she's only 13, and I don't want to put undue influence upon her. For now, I told her that we'll have personal, weekly talks after class about what she might potentially be going through, but I'm not sure about anything else. How should I go about this? Thanks everyone, and have a good day![/QUOTE] I'm glad you're willing to help them out and guide them, but you're probably not an expert, it seems you're well aware of that, and for both your and their's sake, it's probably best to find someone who has knowledge and experience in this field, who can give them the help they need. Not saying you're not helpful, but you could end up getting asked questions where you don't know what to answer.

[QUOTE=Political Gamer;53127456]Finally a question I can help out with! For support, I highly recommend the [url=http://www.centeronhalsted.org/]Center on Halsted[/url] and [url=https://howardbrown.org/programs-services/transgender-health/]Howard Brown[/url] for any medical (hormones) needs. Contacting the Center on Halsted would be a good first step and can most likely help facilitate a productive discussion along with supporting resources. Hopefully, it isn't too difficult for either of you to get into the city but if you/they need help navigating the public transit I can happily provide more detailed directions.[/QUOTE] Sounds good. I'll check those resources out, and contact the Center on Halsted, maybe even try to get a representative to come and talk to her. Seems like a [I]great[/I] first step. Especially the teen youth hangout event thing. Don't worry about the transit, living here all my life has made me memorize all CTA and Metra lines. [QUOTE=Tinter;53129591]There's giving the benefit of the doubt and then there's being naivé. You should never go too far with being nice to the point where you let yourself get walked all over. I'm glad you're willing to help them out and guide them, but you're probably not an expert, it seems you're well aware of that, and for both your and their's sake, it's probably best to find someone who has knowledge and experience in this field, who can give them the help they need. Not saying you're not helpful, but you could end up getting asked questions where you don't know what to answer.[/QUOTE] Yeah, I definitely recognize that, no worries. I'm going to see if there's people any of my friends or co-workers know that have gone through the process to talk to her personally as well as someone from the Center on Halsted. I'll make it so it's not too overbearing. I'd rather just be her support-base, not her controller. Thanks for the help, everyone. If it doesn't bother anyone, I'll be sure to update any significant progress.

[QUOTE=Omilinon;53129847]Sounds good. I'll check those resources out, and contact the Center on Halsted, maybe even try to get a representative to come and talk to her. Seems like a [I]great[/I] first step. Especially the teen youth hangout event thing. Don't worry about the transit, living here all my life has made me memorize all CTA and Metra lines. Thanks for the help, everyone. If it doesn't bother anyone, I'll be sure to update any significant progress.[/QUOTE]Honestly I'm just glad you're there for them and any updates would be great to hear as well!

[t]https://i.imgur.com/u1i0ect.jpg[/t] i got my hair done and i feel ~fantastic~

[QUOTE=gtanoofa;53135497]OMG you're so adorable![/QUOTE] thank you!! that means a lot coming from the most adorable person in this thread :cat:

A co-worker told me today that she was trans. I was amazed and had no idea, she has got stealth down to a tee. Made me feel a lot better about my chances when she shared her photos with me.

So I haven't been very active lately, but I randomly decided to go to a concert last weekend en femme and it was [I]fantastic[/I]. [img_thumb]https://i.imgur.com/Icd2vmA.jpg[/img_thumb]

[QUOTE=Clovis;53138222]woah how long have you been doing makeup for? it looks great rad outfit too[/QUOTE] Thanks! If I had to guess I'd say that's my 30-40th time doing makeup over the last two years.

[QUOTE=Clovis;53138238]The lipstick especially is perfect, i cant do lipstick for shit and end up skipping it normally[/QUOTE] I use a little bit of darker liner around my natural lip before red lipstick, and then a bit of gloss for good measure. My eyeliner game needs some work but it's slowly getting there. Looks nice in photos but ass in real life. This was the other outfit I was thinking about but ultimately decided against. [img_thumb]https://i.imgur.com/p6k3iKX.jpg[/img_thumb][img_thumb]https://i.imgur.com/qSt3lox.jpg[/img_thumb]

Hey guys, quick little update. Things went over great on Friday. I was able to get a representative from Center on Halsted to come in and talk to her for well over an hour. I let her school counselor what's going up as well, and she was really receptive to her situation, so it'll look like she'll have some help with going through this from another figure she trusts. I'm not able to help her throughout the week with my super-heavy workload, so at least she'll have someone to fall back to when I'm not there. All in all, a great first step! Thanks again for your help guys, I'll let you know whenever there's any big progress.

So apparently the process for getting HRT in Sweden is: 1. Book a doctor's appointment just so you can get a referral to a psychiatrist 2. Convince a general psychiatrist to give you a referral to one of the 6 transgender clinics in the country 3. Muck around at said clinic to go through some arduous "investigation" And all that can take between 1 and 2 years. Oh, and the closest one of those clinics is 260km (160 miles) away from me. Since I'm registered in a different municipality I probably can't go to the Stockholm one unless I can pay for it myself (it's waaay further away, but would be far easier since my parents live there and the flights are dirt cheap). Pretty sure I got told to fuck myself.