Crossdressing & Transgender & A̲L̲L̲I̲E̲S̲ Discussion v. Thread Reassignment Surgery - General

Maybe I already have a negative view point on how I will look because of all the pictures I have seen with fat guys with long hair.

Considering coming out to my other parent next weekend on the ride back to university. Has anybody here ever come out to someone while in a car ride, and if so how'd it go?

I did it by a letter because I found it easier, I'm not good at talking about personal issues.

I did it by letter as well. I tend to completely shut down if I try to discuss my problems with people.

Well, its good you're aware of it.

I still have a lot of trouble looking in mirrors. Also in going to politely ask my family to get rid of all of my... old photos. They really hurt to look at.

I'm pretty sure my parents put up even more of my old photos after I came out to them.

I always used to stare at myself in the mirror when I was younger and I'd stress about my appearance a lot. My parents thought I was vain, but in hindsight it was probably me being confused about how I looked. I still feel kind of uncomfortable looking at my face, I just see it as a thing I have to look at when doing stuff like shaving. It looks and feels a lot more like 'me' when I've put on some makeup and taken care of myself, though.

hi all, posting on an alt acc cause of over self consciousness and dont want irl friends lurking. just wanted to ask a few questions but dont know where to start. im a male but have always felt less masculine than most males eg dont like any sports, prefer to have longish hair, have 0 sex drive (asexual?) compared to other male friends and most of my best friends were female. im extremely self conscious and it has affected the person ive become. i feel like im not entirely myself and its too late to change, or the only way to change would be to start a new life where i cut all contact from old friends/family and make new ones. (none of my family/friends would be understanding). i feel like ive lost sight of who my true self is since i always try to change when around other people thinking they wont like who i am or something.. and due to my self consciousness im not sure of who the real me is since im always monitoring my own thoughts and behavior. i hide most things from friends/family and im extremely personal as in i dont talk about my problems ever so i dont really have anyone trustworthy to talk to. how can i be less self conscious and more comfortable being me? when and how did you guys start "living the real you" without holding back or being afraid of what people thought?

[QUOTE=The golden;49922299]I've long felt very feminine as a person (I'm male) and I've felt a very strong attraction to femininity, not just on a sexual level but on a personal level. Acting in a feminine way or wearing things associated with it always made me feel very peaceful and warm inside. Literally the first things I bought when I got a job were women's clothing. Whereas being called things like "sir" (if I'm at work) or man, etc always made me feel uncomfortable and I never liked it. I never understood why. I also don't like looking at myself in mirrors - I usually cover the mirror whenever I'm in the bathroom. I've also torn my pictures out of all my yearbooks or scratched them out during one of many instances of intense self-hatred. I never really thought much of all that but I've been reading through this thread (yes, I only just discovered it :v:) and other material online and a lot is starting to make sense to me. I've never considered myself an opponent of transgenderism but it always did confuse me a lot but now it's really starting to make more sense to me now that I can apply my own feelings and experiences to it. I'm really not sure what to do with myself. I have a lot of thinking to do.[/QUOTE] I'm kind of the same tbh but I don't really bother to think about it much :v:

[QUOTE=Kyle902;49879896]Its good that you're not bottling it up anymore. What state do you live in? I might be able to help you narrow down your search a little bit. Also a good portion of shrinks charge you a fee scaled to your current income so you might not end up paying too much for therapy. 24 isn't that late of an age to transition tbh. You should be fine in that regard. As for the family and friends, I suggest you do some probing to see who would be accepting and who wouldn't be.[/QUOTE] Sorry for the late reply. I live in CA. I wasn't aware of it when I made that post but I am still covered by the same health insurance as my parents, meaning if I go through UCLA I can apparently see a shrink for relatively cheap. I will probably try that but I'd be glad to hear if there are more specific services out there. I've been putting out feelers for how my family would even react to me coming out. It mostly boiled down to, "trans people are weird but who cares if they are not hurting anyone." I'm not entirely sure some of them will be supportive but I am going to do it anyway. When I grow a spine.

[QUOTE=The_Funk;49928679]Sorry for the late reply. I live in CA. I wasn't aware of it when I made that post but I am still covered by the same health insurance as my parents, meaning if I go through UCLA I can apparently see a shrink for relatively cheap. I will probably try that but I'd be glad to hear if there are more specific services out there. I've been putting out feelers for how my family would even react to me coming out. It mostly boiled down to, "trans people are weird but who cares if they are not hurting anyone." I'm not entirely sure some of them will be supportive but I am going to do it anyway. When I grow a spine.[/QUOTE] Oh hey i live in la county too, add me on steam and ill give you a list of resources and stuff that'll help you [editline]13th March 2016[/editline] What city do you live in?

[QUOTE=GhostProject;49914945]So my sister has been mentioning to my family on and off that she "wants to be transgender", she's only 11 so I'm not sure if these feelings are totally genuine, but I feel bad because I sort of feel responsible for her interest in transgender people. I also feel really terrible for hoping she isn't seriously considering being transgender because I don't want her to feel similar distress I feel because of it. I'd of course support her entirely if what she says is true, but I feel bad for hoping that she's not actually feeling these feelings for real.[/QUOTE] Children are getting confused about their identity, it happened back in the days too but it seems to be more frequent these days, I honestly don't know what to feel but I can put myself in your shoes.

[QUOTE=NeverGoWest;49930784]Children are getting confused about their identity, it happened back in the days too but it seems to be more frequent these days, I honestly don't know what to feel but I can put myself in your shoes.[/QUOTE] Trust me, kids have always been trying to figure themselves out and develop their own identity and what they want to be and that sort of thing, they're not suddenly "getting confused" like how conservatives complain they would be if LGBT topics were taught in schools. It's just that certain aspects of that (figuring out their gender n' stuff) have been overtly suppressed by society and parents and whatnot up until now; questioning their gender is a normal thing kids and adults do and should be encouraged. If in the end their sister ends up being cis or ends up being transgender, that's a good thing! God if I knew being transgender was a thing and that I'd have 100% support from my parents/peers I'd have started transition so much earlier and been so much more happy growing up.

[QUOTE=The golden;49934305]Update on this: I shared my feelings with her and she has exploded into a terrified fit. Considering she is very sexually diverse I expected this to go better. I expect to be single by the end of the night.[/QUOTE] Thats always fucked. If she can't accept you for who you are then thats not a relationship worth pursuing further.

[QUOTE=NeverGoWest;49930784]Children are getting confused about their identity, it happened back in the days too but it seems to be more frequent these days, I honestly don't know what to feel but I can put myself in your shoes.[/QUOTE] It does seem more frequent these days, however I believe it has more to do with further acceptance in the LGBT community and with more topic spotlight in the media and such. It makes me wonder; if I grew up in this era would I take action on my thoughts of transitioning around the same age as my little sister? When I was around her age, or even younger; (the earliest I remember would be around 9 years old in second grade.) I thought heavily about being someone other than me, usually mentally depicting myself as a female. But at the same time I suppressed all those feelings out of fear of what others might think. I grew up in a relatively urban area where being feminine was a clause for insult or even beating on occasion, so I learned very quick to hide whatever bit of genuine identity I had, and present myself the way others around me would be comfortable seeing me, and it took me a very long time to break that habit. I'm only just now starting to take steps in the direction I want my identity to take, and I still have a ways to go. [QUOTE=The golden;49934305]Update on this: I shared my feelings with her and she has exploded into a terrified fit. Considering she is very sexually diverse I expected this to go better. I expect to be single by the end of the night.[/QUOTE] I'm sorry to hear. :( I hope things between you two go well even if you expect the worst.

[QUOTE=Kyle902;49934328]Thats always fucked. If she can't accept you for who you are then thats not a relationship worth pursuing further.[/QUOTE] Its not that simple, for some people hearing that is quite alot to take at once. You ould be surprised how many people are concerned that someone can change entirely along with their gender, and thats the tip of the iceberg for all the reasons she might be concerned. I wish you luck golden

[QUOTE=Kyle902;49934328]Thats always fucked. If she can't accept you for who you are then thats not a relationship worth pursuing further.[/QUOTE] I've been so far down the rabbit hole so long that I get this feeling/reaction too and it's difficult to think/feel otherwise

I mean if a potential partner can't handle me metamorphosing into a dragon and becoming like unto a god then I guess we weren't meant to be.

[QUOTE=The golden;49934602]Some of her concerns are things like if my sexual orientation will change from females to males which is understandable for someone who doesn't understand transgenderism. But she's saying things like "If you change your body to something I don't like then I can't be with you." Even if a solution can be found I'm starting to wonder if I even should accept it.[/QUOTE] that Is Bad situation. Also heads up: Your sexual preference can change with hormone therapy or even absence of sex hormone. For how much or in what way, who knows. Just so you are aware. That should not be reason for her to break ties entirely. Try educating her about it, and from what I can tell, you are exploring the possibility, not fully set on transitioning yet right? [QUOTE=The golden;49934745]oh[/QUOTE] I am sorry to hear that...

[QUOTE=The golden;49934745]She is telling me that any feminization of my body would be fake and she would not allow me to touch myself in a sexual way or make love to me.[/QUOTE] She sounds kind of mental.

[QUOTE=The golden;49934745]I'm still exploring myself and educating myself but I've always wanted to be female since I was very young, so a transition is inevitable sometime or another. Especially considering HRT and SRS are fully covered by my medical plan if I desire that. As it stands now, she is the one breaking ties rather than myself. She is currently in the process of trying to convince me it's a " dumb phase" despite the fact she herself went 10 or so years as a FtM. She is telling me that any feminization of my body would be fake and she would not allow me to touch myself in a sexual way or make love to me.[/QUOTE] Jesus christ, sorry but that is just cuntish of her. She sounds like one of those really hardline radical feminists who see a MtF as a male invading the female identity or some crap like that. That would have maddened me, but I am lucky to not be emotionally dependent on anyone like that. Depriving you of sexual pleasure even in the form of masturbation is a big nono. Make a decision about her and make it wise, she may not be the one for you. Stay safe Golden. [editline]15th March 2016[/editline] [QUOTE=The golden;49935002]After she started to request I delete my personal online accounts as a "favor" to her for the things I have supposedly done to her, I have pulled the plug. I came to her expecting at least some kind of support considering she was my lover after all but instead I Just hit with a wall of "well what about my feelings?" when I talked about my gender identity. So uh yeah. Time to spend the next few weeks feeling like shit.[/QUOTE] Guard yourself, I have been denied myself by people incapable of understanding me, I have also felt heartache, but never at the same time. I(We?) feel with you.

I had a vicious meltdown in the shower last night. I hate showing negative emotion even on my own, so my mind was whirling between rage, confusion, jealously, self-hate and sadness every few seconds. This happens all the time but it really went to town on my head last night. I'm going to have an aneurysm or something one of these days.

[QUOTE=evlbzltyr;49934837]She sounds kind of mental.[/QUOTE] It honestly sounds like projection to me. "I was an FtM for 10 years but I regretted it and because I did you should too"

Started school today. Holy shit. Nobody seemed motivated. There was a club for the reunification of the Confederacy. Apparently there was a teacher last year who was exposed as atheist and people trashed his room and would harass him so much he left. Someone nice told be about the areas and stuff, and apparently they noticed people staring at me left and right. Fun times, thank fuck I graduate in 2 months. EDIT: OH SHIT ALMOST FORGOT, when I was walking home there were like 3 squad cars around a house, apparently across the street someone was being mugged when class got out.

I managed to get 5 pounds back. Fukk yee

[QUOTE=The golden;49940458]I have spent most of the day in shaking fits and trying not to throw up everywhere. I feel absolutely horrible.[/QUOTE] I'd give you a hug if you weren't at risk of getting sick all over me :v: My condolences about your gf, sometimes the people we least expect turn out to be total lunatics. [IMG]https://facepunch.com/fp/ratings/heart.png[/IMG]

I hate having body hair so much. It really disgusts me how it wants to grow EVERYWHERE. Thanks testosterone for making me feel disgusted at my self. :v: I want to shave it all off. But some of it is in hard to reach places and I figure whats the point when it will just be fully grown back in a day or two.

[QUOTE=dayzero;49916843]Considering coming out to my other parent next weekend on the ride back to university. Has anybody here ever come out to someone while in a car ride, and if so how'd it go?[/QUOTE] Well it's not optimal. With me it turned into 30 minutes of silence after my dad had this gem: "you sure? People might give you a hard time in life if they know." But that was just for being gay. [editline]15th March 2016[/editline] [QUOTE=MissingGlitch;49941657]I hate having body hair so much. It really disgusts me how it wants to grow EVERYWHERE. Thanks testosterone for making me feel disgusted at my self. :v: I want to shave it all off. But some of it is in hard to reach places and I figure whats the point when it will just be fully grown back in a day or two.[/QUOTE] I'll tell you if my bf's cream works when we try it out. Hair removal cream that is.

Psych wards are awful. Don't even think of committing suicide, girls. You will be both creep out and bored out of your mind when they force you to go to a psych ward,