Super Friendly Social and Love Advice V6 - JUST FUCKING ASK HER OUT

[Metallics]

[QUOTE=Rhenae;42473164]GSA is a club we had at my school too. Its a support and awareness group for lgbt stuff in the school, was one of the most popular clubs we had actually. They ran a couple poster ad campaigns around the school and most events were just hanging out and getting along.

My school was already quite accepting (although people still couldnt get over not calling things gay as in lame but whatever) and the group seemed entirely pointless to me, so I never bothered going but it would be a great place to meet nice people.[/QUOTE]

Makes it sound like alcoholics anonymous for lgbt people

[Big D Duchovny]

[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;42470510]There's also this really cute girl I see around campus quite a bit, but most of the time I see her is when we're walking in opposite directions and I have a class to go to. Today I was walking to my class which turned out to be cancelled and when we walked past each other we made eye contact and awkwardly smiled at each other, although she seemed to be way more awkward about it than me. Other than that I'll see her sitting be herself reading with headphones on once in a while but to me that just makes it look like she doesn't want people talking to her.

So I'm essentially asking how I should go about talking to this girl some time.

[editline]9th October 2013[/editline]

Her friends are neckbeards who wear fedoras and camo hats.[/QUOTE]

Ask her what she's reading and what kind of music she likes? And don't care about what her friends wear - after all, despite their fedoras and neckbeards they actually talked to her, right?

[editline]10th October 2013[/editline]

[QUOTE=Dyson6;42470153]Been trying to schedule a second date with this girl, and she's dropped out at the last minute three separate times. BUT she has no problem giving me a new, specific day to reschedule and seems totally engaged in phone/text conversations.

I don't doubt it's possible to have a lot of stuff going on, but I can't help but get pretty paranoid. My jumping to conclusions has definitely gotten me into trouble before though.[/QUOTE]

My girlfriend rescheduled a lot of stuff, being legitimately busy is not that unthinkable. If she seems like she actually wants to hang out with you, chances are she actually wants to.

[RocketRacer]

holy fuck. Today that girl I told about that I like apprently, told me that I am sweet when we walking to the bus stop with her (female) friend. And today during lunch I was talking to her and other people(some of them I already know) and shit it was such a good lunch. I love talking to that girl and some other people because we were laughing all the time. They asked me questions about Latvia and how I ended up here in UK and stuff.

I feel so great inside. Never [I]ever[/I] a girl I like told me that I am sweet.

[Emugod]

I'm in college, and I live in on-campus housing. There's this girl that lives two doors down from me that I have a enormous crush on. I have no clue how to approach her. We've introduced ourselves already, and we've had passing conversations, but we've never actually sat down together and talked or hung out together. I want to get to know her more, but I'm too afraid to initiate the conversation. I don't really see her very often besides the occasional running into each other going to classes.

I have a slight feeling that she might be interested in me, as she's said multiple times that she likes how I look, she initiates conversations, and she maybe takes a glance at me from time to time. However, we're at a college with a 4:1 ratio of guys to girls, so guys are limited to what girls they have to choose. And, I constantly see her talking to guys that I find I cannot compete with. First of all, they actually initiate conversations and can keep the conversation going. Second, they're better looking. She's also in a sorority, so she's constantly having events and I have less chances to talk to her.

There have been many chances where I could go up and talk to her, but I don't have the courage to do it. I have terrible social anxiety, and I start freaking out if I even approach her. I'm a lot better when I'm with a group of friends, and I don't initiate the conversation, but, otherwise, I'm completely worthless. I don't exactly have a problem talking to girls that I'm comfortable with, because I have several girl friends that I can easily talk to. It's just talking to her is hard. I'm completely pathetic and I don't know what to do.

[Aries]

[B]just threw up for the first time in ten years, stay tuned for the next announcement in 2023[/B]

[RainbowStalin]

[QUOTE=Aries;42478404][B]just threw up for the first time in ten years, stay tuned for the next announcement in 2023[/B][/QUOTE]

Its cool isn't it unless you throw up due to alcohol then you keep throwing up and it doesn't stop and you think you're going to die

[RocketRacer]

[QUOTE=Emugod;42478248]I'm in college, and I live in on-campus housing. There's this girl that lives two doors down from me that I have a enormous crush on. I have no clue how to approach her. We've introduced ourselves already, and we've had passing conversations, but we've never actually sat down together and talked or hung out together. I want to get to know her more, but I'm too afraid to initiate the conversation. I don't really see her very often besides the occasional running into each other going to classes.

I have a slight feeling that she might be interested in me, as she's said multiple times that she likes how I look, she initiates conversations, and she maybe takes a glance at me from time to time. However, we're at a college with a 4:1 ratio of guys to girls, so guys are limited to what girls they have to choose. And, I constantly see her talking to guys that I find I cannot compete with. First of all, they actually initiate conversations and can keep the conversation going. Second, they're better looking. She's also in a sorority, so she's constantly having events and I have less chances to talk to her.

There have been many chances where I could go up and talk to her, but I don't have the courage to do it. I have terrible social anxiety, and I start freaking out if I even approach her. I'm a lot better when I'm with a group of friends, and I don't initiate the conversation, but, otherwise, I'm completely worthless. I don't exactly have a problem talking to girls that I'm comfortable with, because I have several girl friends that I can easily talk to. It's just talking to her is hard. I'm completely pathetic and I don't know what to do.[/QUOTE]
Try to stop thinking about the 'crush' part of her, just talk with her, at least [I]try [/I]to.

[Aries]

[QUOTE=RainbowStalin;42478457]Its cool isn't it unless you throw up due to alcohol then you keep throwing up and it doesn't stop and you think you're going to die[/QUOTE]

oh dude it was such a blast

[editline]11th October 2013[/editline]

i don't actually know how to clean vomit up because the last time i threw up i was eight turning nine and my mum did it for me.

[Emugod]

[QUOTE=RocketRacer;42478485]Try to stop thinking about the 'crush' part of her, just talk with her, at least [I]try [/I]to.[/QUOTE]

That's not the problem, I have a social anxiety problem that makes it impossible to talk to people I am not comfortable with. For the longest time, even the anonymity of the internet didn't help. I freaked the fuck out making posts on facepunch/various other forums. I still slightly have the problem and am dealing with it slowly.

[blueskyy]

[QUOTE=RocketRacer;42477370]holy fuck. Today that girl I told about that I like apprently, told me that I am sweet when we walking to the bus stop with her (female) friend. And today during lunch I was talking to her and other people(some of them I already know) and shit it was such a good lunch. I love talking to that girl and some other people because we were laughing all the time. They asked me questions about Latvia and how I ended up here in UK and stuff.

I feel so great inside. Never [I]ever[/I] a girl I like told me that I am sweet.[/QUOTE]

sorry to burst your bubble bro but it really doesn't mean much at all when a girl calls you sweet
its like the same as someone calling you nice

[TheBirdman]

Well for one it means they dont think youre ugly dumb or repulsive

[Daniel Smith]

Today was rough...

I do volunteer work as a teacher's assistant close to the end of the school day, basically I have to do the teacher's dirty work and also help out the grade 9 kids, but it is tough. Today the teacher was late coming into class so I just sat there doing my own thing and just waiting for her to come because I cannot take care of a class by myself. While I was looking the other way, I saw one of the students crying and she and her best friend went out of the classroom and I didn't get enough time to ask what happened because they were gone just like that. I thought that another student had hurt her and I felt terrible for not paying attention and doing my job, it all happened so quickly. Later I found out that fortunately it was just an accident. I still have this negative feeling in me even though it is all over and I need some cheering up.

So basically I need advice on how to not miss stuff like this.

[RocketRacer]

[QUOTE=blueskyy;42479171]sorry to burst your bubble bro but it really doesn't mean much at all when a girl calls you sweet
its like the same as someone calling you nice[/QUOTE]

You have no idea how my childhood has passed and how I feel about myself. I think that I can't do shit and I suck at everything at college right now, but when someone compliments me and especially when it is a girl, and [I]especially[/I] when I like her, it means a lot for me. I am a new foreign student in their company of people where they know each other for years, and when they are actually talking with me and when they all say that I am nice, it means a lot to me.

[editline]10th October 2013[/editline]

[QUOTE=Daniel Smith;42479911]Today was rough...

I do volunteer work as a teacher's assistant close to the end of the school day, basically I have to do the teacher's dirty work and also help out the grade 9 kids, but it is tough. Today the teacher was late coming into class so I just sat there doing my own thing and just waiting for her to come because I cannot take care of a class by myself. While I was looking the other way, I saw one of the students crying and she and her best friend went out of the classroom and I didn't get enough time to ask what happened because they were gone just like that. I thought that another student had hurt her and I felt terrible for not paying attention and doing my job, it all happened so quickly. Later I found out that fortunately it was just an accident. I still have this negative feeling in me even though it is all over and I need some cheering up.

So basically I need advice on how to not miss stuff like this.[/QUOTE]

When no teacher is around, don't do your thing and watch the class. It will be better and more appreciated if you will be watching the kids.

[PuduEbooks]

Okay, i'm having trouble and i'm afraid of learning via trial and error so...
This girl, who's younger than me (not that much), so, since like 7 months ago, i met her and we became friends, only meeting on school and such (i had no romantic intentions at that moment).
Fast forward to past week, well, i wan't to do something with her, because i started liking her a lot, so i asked her to watch a movie with me, but she said she had to see a friend of hers that day.
The next day, we take the bus together, and we didn't talked at all, i did some attemps to start a conversation, but nothing came form it, same some days later.
Well, it could not necesesarily be me, maybe a family problem or something, do i ask her if she's alright and stuff, or i should just give her space?
Fuck that was long, sorry for the bad english, i'm not used to writing that much.

[MuffinZerg]

[QUOTE=Cosa8888;42480995]Okay, i'm having trouble and i'm afraid of learning via trial and error so...
This girl, who's younger than me (not that much), so, since like 7 months ago, i met her and we became friends, only meeting on school and such (i had no romantic intentions at that moment).
Fast forward to past week, well, i wan't to do something with her, because i started liking her a lot, so i asked her to watch a movie with me, but she said she had to see a friend of hers that day.
The next day, we take the bus together, and we didn't talked at all, i did some attemps to start a conversation, but nothing came form it, same some days later.
Well, it could not necesesarily be me, maybe a family problem or something, do i ask her if she's alright and stuff, or i should just give her space?
Fuck that was long, sorry for the bad english, i'm not used to writing that much.[/QUOTE]

I wouldn't advice asking someone outright to a date before you got at least comfortable with eachother.

Now give her space. If she rejected you, and I am sure she did, that is becuse you probably scared her. Wait for things to cool down and attempt to make you two have a dialogue every day. Just make it so whenever each of you wants to talk to the other one, he can approach and start a conversation.

Start with some small talk. Find some interests you share.

Just don't overdo anything.

[editline]11th October 2013[/editline]

[QUOTE=Daniel Smith;42479911]Today was rough...

I do volunteer work as a teacher's assistant close to the end of the school day, basically I have to do the teacher's dirty work and also help out the grade 9 kids, but it is tough. Today the teacher was late coming into class so I just sat there doing my own thing and just waiting for her to come because I cannot take care of a class by myself. While I was looking the other way, I saw one of the students crying and she and her best friend went out of the classroom and I didn't get enough time to ask what happened because they were gone just like that. I thought that another student had hurt her and I felt terrible for not paying attention and doing my job, it all happened so quickly. Later I found out that fortunately it was just an accident. I still have this negative feeling in me even though it is all over and I need some cheering up.

So basically I need advice on how to not miss stuff like this.[/QUOTE]
You could try to talk to some people in the class. That would entertain you both.

[opti2000]

[QUOTE=Cosa8888;42480995]Okay, i'm having trouble and i'm afraid of learning via trial and error so...
This girl, who's younger than me (not that much), so, since like 7 months ago, i met her and we became friends, only meeting on school and such (i had no romantic intentions at that moment).
Fast forward to past week, well, i wan't to do something with her, because i started liking her a lot, so i asked her to watch a movie with me, but she said she had to see a friend of hers that day.
The next day, we take the bus together, and we didn't talked at all, i did some attemps to start a conversation, but nothing came form it, same some days later.
Well, it could not necesesarily be me, maybe a family problem or something, do i ask her if she's alright and stuff, or i should just give her space?
Fuck that was long, sorry for the bad english, i'm not used to writing that much.[/QUOTE]

I was once in the exact same situation like you but my version ended bad...with a broken heart and lovesickness...

You should really talk to her and ask what's wrong. I mean you are a human and humans are not able to read minds. Communication is really important. I guess you like her in a special way (love) and if thats true dont let her go.

[PuduEbooks]

[QUOTE=opti2000;42483201]I was once in the exact same situation like you but my version ended bad...with a broken heart and lovesickness...

You should really talk to her and ask what's wrong. I mean you are a human and humans are not able to read minds. Communication is really important. I guess you like her in a special way (love) and if thats true dont let her go.[/QUOTE]

Yeah i guess that's what i'm gonna do. I mean, she still laughs a bit if a try to make a (bad) joke while trying to start a conversation, but she doesn't follow it.

[jhfjdh746]

Please somebody help me; it's almost been a month since me and my ex broke up; we were together for two years and broke up about two weeks ago.

I felt like actually loved her; and she told me today that she was just with me because she didn't want to be alone; and I actually feel really hurt over it.

This is a person I gave everything to; literally dropped my life to be with her for two years and as mad as I am at her; I still miss the good times, and that's whats eating at me.

I haven't been able to sleep because she used to sleep in the bed with me; I feel empty and alone despite having all my friends around.

I don't know if I'm just being a bitch and I should just knuckle the fuck up; or is it normal to feel like this?

It's literally killing me; I can't sleep, I can't hardly function at school; work is only where I feel a little better and that's because I work with family.

Please help me.

[opti2000]

[QUOTE=S33T;42488037]Please somebody help me; it's almost been a month since me and my ex broke up; we were together for two years and broke up about two weeks ago.

I felt like actually loved her; and she told me today that she was just with me because she didn't want to be alone; and I actually feel really hurt over it.

This is a person I gave everything to; literally dropped my life to be with her for two years and as mad as I am at her; I still miss the good times, and that's whats eating at me.

I haven't been able to sleep because she used to sleep in the bed with me; I feel empty and alone despite having all my friends around.

I don't know if I'm just being a bitch and I should just knuckle the fuck up; or is it normal to feel like this?

It's literally killing me; I can't sleep, I can't hardly function at school; work is only where I feel a little better and that's because I work with family.

Please help me.[/QUOTE]

Well you can interpret her statement about "didnt want to be alone" in different ways. On one side she had definitely feelings for you because a 2 year relationship is not a short time. But on the other hand it sounds like she exploited you just to feel "good" and not to be alone.

I dont know much about your relationship with her so i cannot really give you good advices.
But i got a question did she told you why she broke up? I mean is there another guy? What was the reason?

And lovesickness is normal...just take your time do something else to feel a little bit better. The next days/weeks will be difficult for you because you will constantly think of her and why this happened suddenly. If its possible also talk with a real good friend about this situation it will be a great relief!

I hope i can help a little bit with my comment.

[MuffinZerg]

[QUOTE=S33T;42488037]Please somebody help me; it's almost been a month since me and my ex broke up; we were together for two years and broke up about two weeks ago.

I felt like actually loved her; and she told me today that she was just with me because she didn't want to be alone; and I actually feel really hurt over it.

This is a person I gave everything to; literally dropped my life to be with her for two years and as mad as I am at her; I still miss the good times, and that's whats eating at me.

I haven't been able to sleep because she used to sleep in the bed with me; I feel empty and alone despite having all my friends around.

I don't know if I'm just being a bitch and I should just knuckle the fuck up; or is it normal to feel like this?

It's literally killing me; I can't sleep, I can't hardly function at school; work is only where I feel a little better and that's because I work with family.

Please help me.[/QUOTE]

I have been there a month ago bro.

It is normal. Your girlfriend seems quite rude breaking up like this. 2 years just to not be alone?

So here is the thing. You will feel like shit. You will miss her. You will feel hopeless. But it's something that will get better if you move on.

Best you can do is to change your life a bit. Go pick up a new hobby. Meet a new friend. Learn a new thing. You will feel like you want to just stand and cry, but that's what you have to fight. You should realise that now both you and your ex are moving separate ways. Memorize the good things and try to move on.
I would strongly advice to break contact with her. You will feel like rummaging throught your past together with her, but that will only hurt you more. You may restore contact and even try to date again, but only after a long break.

Also stay the hell out of other relationships. I made a mistake of starting a realtionship while I wasn't over my break up yet. It was completely terrible, worst mistake I made.

Life's not over mate. Don't give up.

[Juice_Layer]

Kind of a long one:

This girl I like from work / university and I went out last night with one of her guy friends that she's known since high school. I'd never hung out with her outside of work, but we'd kept talking about it. She's 23 and I'm 21 in a week. We went to a concert at one of the beach venues, it was some band she liked and I wasn't about to pass up a chance to hang out with her away from work.

Anyways, she drank a little, but didn't get drunk, just a minor tipsy. We ended up having a blast, we danced (although everyone else at the show was "too cool to dance" and goofed around). I had my hand above her waist while I was dancing behind her and she moved it down toward her upper thigh and backed into me some, then I'd put my hand up and she'd grab it and hold it for a minute.

Then when we were leaving she rode piggy back on me to the car and ended up sitting in the back of the car with her friend on the ride home - she had been drinking and her friend was super drunk, like 7.5/10 so I told them I'd at least drive to my place.

We were talking and listening to music on the way back and she like put her arms around my neck and gave me a kiss on the cheek from behind me in the car as I was driving and said she had an awesome time. We got to my place and she drove the rest of the way back to hers (she had picked me up with her friend). She insisted on walking me to my door, and I didn't want to make a move on the first time of us hanging out and kiss her, especially since it wasn't initially a date scenario, so I just gave her a hug.

I didn't know what to think of the kiss on the cheek and chicks just love dancing anyways, so I didn't make much of that either. It's just hard to believe that the girl I'm actually into who's two years older than me would be into me - I probably seem like a kid to her. Also, she's notorious at work for not ever dating anybody and pretty much every guy at work has some sort of crush on her because she's gorgeous and tremendously pleasant and nice to be around all the time.

She said she wants to come out for my 21st birthday next week to a show with me and some of my friends and then hit up the bars. Then she insisted on us going to a show a week after that and coming to a show I'm interested in seeing the following week (yes, TONS of concerts going on this next month). What are your thoughts on this?

[MuffinZerg]

[QUOTE=Juice_Layer;42492055]Kind of a long one:

This girl I like from work / university and I went out last night with one of her guy friends that she's known since high school. I'd never hung out with her outside of work, but we'd kept talking about it. She's 23 and I'm 21 in a week. We went to a concert at one of the beach venues, it was some band she liked and I wasn't about to pass up a chance to hang out with her away from work.

Anyways, she drank a little, but didn't get drunk, just a minor tipsy. We ended up having a blast, we danced (although everyone else at the show was "too cool to dance" and goofed around). I had my hand above her waist while I was dancing behind her and she moved it down toward her upper thigh and backed into me some, then I'd put my hand up and she'd grab it and hold it for a minute.

Then when we were leaving she rode piggy back on me to the car and ended up sitting in the back of the car with her friend on the ride home - she had been drinking and her friend was super drunk, like 7.5/10 so I told them I'd at least drive to my place.

We were talking and listening to music on the way back and she like put her arms around my neck and gave me a kiss on the cheek from behind me in the car as I was driving and said she had an awesome time. We got to my place and she drove the rest of the way back to hers (she had picked me up with her friend). She insisted on walking me to my door, and I didn't want to make a move on the first time of us hanging out and kiss her, especially since it wasn't initially a date scenario, so I just gave her a hug.

I didn't know what to think of the kiss on the cheek and chicks just love dancing anyways, so I didn't make much of that either. It's just hard to believe that the girl I'm actually into who's two years older than me would be into me - I probably seem like a kid to her. Also, she's notorious at work for not ever dating anybody and pretty much every guy at work has some sort of crush on her because she's gorgeous and tremendously pleasant and nice to be around all the time.

She said she wants to come out for my 21st birthday next week to a show with me and some of my friends and then hit up the bars. Then she insisted on us going to a show a week after that and coming to a show I'm interested in seeing the following week (yes, TONS of concerts going on this next month). What are your thoughts on this?[/QUOTE]

Sounds like a really cool girl.

Here is the thing: she likes you. Maybe not like she wants you as your man - yet - but you are attractive to her, so if you make a move you won't meet a wall.

I would say - hang out with her after work. Casually invite her for a walk, have some chat. Well you know the drill. Just see what it comes out of it.

Then, if you will get on well, just kiss her one day. After you have had some great time together, before parting ways, hug her and chat while hugging. Then kiss her. If she looks at you like "what are you doing?" don't start explaining yourself, but say something like 'Couldn't resist' with the emotional message of 'I REGRET NOTHING'.

[Taepodong-2]

I think I missed my only chance to ever talk to that girl in my class without her friends being around. Oh well, not like she would ever like me anyway.

[Slowbro]

[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;42492271]I think I missed my only chance to ever talk to that girl in my class without her friends being around. Oh well, not like she would ever like me anyway.[/QUOTE]

oh my god

stop this now

you're not going to get any sympathy from us for just pussying out

if you want to talk to this girl just fucking talk to her jesus

[Deadman123]

hello mr cynical!

[Taepodong-2]

I literally have no idea what to even say. She's not even going to want to be friends with me if I can't do that. Every girl I talk to ends up bored and never wants to talk to me again so I see no reason why she should like talking to me. Looks like I'm going back to talking to Russian girls on the internet.

[MuffinZerg]

[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;42492441]I literally have no idea what to even say. She's not even going to want to be friends with me if I can't do that. Every girl I talk to ends up bored and never wants to talk to me again so I see no reason why she should like talking to me. Looks like I'm going back to talking to Russian girls on the internet.[/QUOTE]

[url]http://www.amazon.com/How-Talk-Anyone-Success-Relationships/dp/007141858X[/url]

thank me later

[Slowbro]

[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;42492441]I literally have no idea what to even say. She's not even going to want to be friends with me if I can't do that. Every girl I talk to ends up bored and never wants to talk to me again so I see no reason why she should like talking to me. Looks like I'm going back to talking to Russian girls on the internet.[/QUOTE]

Well you could always

[IMG]http://i42.tinypic.com/2s77vqh.png[/IMG]

[Taepodong-2]

[QUOTE=Slowbro;42492502]Well you could always

[IMG]http://i42.tinypic.com/2s77vqh.png[/IMG][/QUOTE]

I would if I had talked to her before and felt like she was at least somewhat interested in me. But I haven't talked to her and she doesn't even know I exist even though I'm literally sitting 5 seats away from her right now.

[Slowbro]

[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;42492544]I would if I had talked to her before and felt like she was at least somewhat interested in me. But [b]I haven't talked to her[/b] and [b]she doesn't even know I exist[/b] even though I'm literally sitting 5 seats away from her right now.[/QUOTE]

I WONDER FUCKING WHY