• Super Friendly Social and Love Advice V6 - JUST FUCKING ASK HER OUT
    11,088 replies, posted
Ok, Taepodong, this is what you're going to do. Get a hobby. Any hobby. Go out and do said hobby. Meet people who have the same hobby and start talking to them. You're going to start making friends. DON'T worry, this is a good thing. Start hanging out with these friends. So, what will you gain from this? You're doing something that you like. You have something new to talk about, your hobby. You're meeting new people who will become your friend! You're going to get better at social interactions. You're going to gain more confidence. You're going to have women swarming over you in no time! Since coming to university, I've picked up skateboarding, parkour, fencing, archery, rock climbing, programming, and more. I've met tons of people by going out and doing these things. I'm becoming more confident in myself because I'm doing things I enjoy doing and meeting new people. Just go out and do things. You'll feel better about yourself. If you don't feel good about yourself, then girls won't want to be near you. And, DO NOT SAY YOU CAN'T DO THIS. YOU CAN DO ANYTHING, BECAUSE YOU'RE TAEPODONG DAMNIT, AND YOU'RE AWESOME. Damn, I felt like shit this morning. I felt pathetic and I even started crying for the first time in a long time. But, my own damn speech made me feel fucking fantastic.
If I had some kind of positive feedback maybe I would have confidence. But I don't get that. I get boredom and rejection. I just need one positive interaction with a girl other than my friend's girlfriends.
you can't rely on other people for your own self worth/confidence find a hobby or something that's rewarding
What's that? I managed to apply to my dream university and got accepted (AKA I'm going back to Ireland)? Fuck yeah. HIGH ON LIFE RIGHT NOW. ALSO I JUST ORDERED INDIAN TAKEAWAY OH MY GOD can this day get any better. Cannot wait to get back into the swing of things with social life and all that good stuff.
[QUOTE=Nikeos;42687806]you can't rely on other people for your own self worth/confidence find a hobby or something that's rewarding[/QUOTE] I'm doing things that are enjoyable and rewarding. I actually have fun gaming again, I'm starting to read more and I'm trying to learn Photoshop among other things. I feel like at this point all that's missing is a romantic partner but I cant do that because I'm bad at socializing and don't know how to make a girl open to wanting to at the very least go on one date with me.
[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;42688035]I'm doing things that are enjoyable and rewarding. I actually have fun gaming again, I'm starting to read more and I'm trying to learn Photoshop among other things. I feel like at this point all that's missing is a romantic partner but I cant do that because I'm bad at socializing and don't know how to make a girl open to wanting to at the very least go on one date with me.[/QUOTE] How many girls have you asked out on a date recently
[QUOTE=RainbowStalin;42688146]How many girls have you asked out on a date recently[/QUOTE] None because I cant seem to get them interested enough in a conversation that they would be likely to say yes.
[QUOTE=loopoo;42688011]What's that? I managed to apply to my dream university and got accepted (AKA I'm going back to Ireland)? Fuck yeah. HIGH ON LIFE RIGHT NOW. ALSO I JUST ORDERED INDIAN TAKEAWAY OH MY GOD can this day get any better. Cannot wait to get back into the swing of things with social life and all that good stuff.[/QUOTE] n skype ect ect
[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;42688158]None because I cant seem to get them interested enough in a conversation that they would be likely to say yes.[/QUOTE] you're putting way too much weight on what your last five words were on as to if she is or isn't going to accept women aren't goldfish
[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;42688158]None because I cant seem to get them interested enough in a conversation that they would be likely to say yes.[/QUOTE] The best thing to do is to try. Scratch that, DO, there is no try. You have more confidence than you think -it's just buried inside you, and only YOU can let it out, only YOU can use it.
[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;42688158]None because I cant seem to get them interested enough in a conversation that they would be likely to say yes.[/QUOTE] You'll get it right when you're a couple of years older, you're trying way too hard right now and grasping the wrong end of the stick completely. Just focus on finding people you like and hanging around them, don't seek out a relationship for the time being.
[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;42688158]None because I cant seem to get them interested enough in a conversation that they would be likely to say yes.[/QUOTE] has it occurred to you that maybe the reason why nobody is interested in talking to you is because you make it blatantly obvious that you're just trying to hook up with someone but completely deny it with your behavior? from what you've said, the only people who you're even acknowledging exist are attractive women. you're probably coming off as a fucking creep, and whether or not you're even bringing up the idea of dating with these people, they can probably tell from your behavior that you're only talking to them because you think they're hot. obviously this is falling on deaf ears but if you can't even finish a conversation with someone without panicking then you're not exactly ready to be a pickup artist. just meet people and make FRIENDS instead of basing who you talk to on appearance. talk to guys too instead of acting like a fucking creep who won't give anyone who's "less than an 8/10" the time of day.
Lately, I've been trying to be more assertive with people because I'm sick and tired of giving so much and getting much less in return. I've had a few people ask me to do things for them lately, and my natural response has been a fairly neutral "no." In most cases, I'm actually busy doing things and I don't really feel too bad denying it, but at the same time I feel like the same people that used to take my willingness for granted are now distancing themselves from me because I'm doing what I want to do more. I've been told and told again to do what I want to do, and take myself into consideration before others, but I'm a afraid that it's going to turn me into a raging dick. I guess my question is, in your guys' experience, how can you tell what the "right thing to do" is when you like the person that wants your help, but you simply don't want to go out of your way?
[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;42688158]None because I cant seem to get them interested enough in a conversation that they would be likely to say yes.[/QUOTE] Bro just talk to people get to know everyone and stop thinking of people as commodities. This isn't a dating sim or something, this is real life. Everyone you talk to has their own life that they're living. How it works is that you interact with enough people and you eventually find people who enjoy your company and you enjoy theirs. That's how you make friends. That's social interaction. Honestly, if you're so pathetic like you seem to think you are, why don't you just talk to people anyway? You don't have anything to lose, man.
[QUOTE=jobizzle;42691034]You'll get it right when you're a couple of years older, you're trying way too hard right now and grasping the wrong end of the stick completely. Just focus on finding people you like and hanging around them, don't seek out a relationship for the time being.[/QUOTE] Yeah I don't want to be a loser who doesn't date until he's 22 thank you very much.
[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;42691476]Yeah I don't want to be a loser who doesn't date until he's 22 thank you very much.[/QUOTE] Being a loser or not has nothing to do with how early or not you date, what the fuck. I'm 21, never had a girlfriend and never kissed but I don't give a shit because I'm a fucking badass, lost over 100 pounds in the past 2 years, I'm one of the best boxer at my gym, I lift 5 days a week every week, I learned how to play Guitar, how to juggle and I'm currently learning how to sing and dance. All that shit without a girl ever. No one was there to crown me so I fucking crowned myself, you don't need anyone to tell you you're awesome because you already are, all you have to do is decide. Fuck that shit about being a loser or not based on how your sex life is.
[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;42691476]Yeah I don't want to be a loser who doesn't date until he's 22 thank you very much.[/QUOTE] yeah this is it you see a relationship with someone as a mark of pride this is like objectification at its most basic
[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;42691476]Yeah I don't want to be a loser who doesn't date until he's 22 thank you very much.[/QUOTE] you already are a loser because you're creeping on hot girls expecting them to date you and not paying any attention to anyone who you don't want to fuck. [editline]29th October 2013[/editline] being a desperate creep is what makes you a loser, not being a single guy who's happy with how his life is.
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;42691543] being a desperate creep is what makes you a loser, not being a single guy who's happy with how his life is.[/QUOTE] I am fairly happy with how my life is going. I'm keeping myself busy for the most part and doing well in school. So if wanting a girl to spend some of my time with is being a desperate creep then I guess that's what I am.
[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;42691577]I am fairly happy with how my life is going. I'm keeping myself busy for the most part and doing well in school. So if wanting a girl to spend some of my time with is being a desperate creep then I guess that's what I am.[/QUOTE] why do you want a girlfriend but not a friend?
Is there something wrong with wanting an attractive partner of the opposite sex or something?
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;42691590]why do you want a girlfriend but not a friend?[/QUOTE] I have friends already, male and female. I want someone who can be more than that.
do you really? you've never mentioned any of them.
no offence but I wouldn't want to be friends with you so i'm not surprised girls lose interest in a few minutes of conversation [editline]29th October 2013[/editline] try fixing your attitude and you might have better luck
if you have the social skills to make friends then why do you keep complaining here about not being able to talk to anyone? i don't get it [editline]29th October 2013[/editline] and a romantic relationship is a type of friendship, if you can't be okay with talking to people and just being friends with them then you're not going to get any further.
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;42691636]if you have the social skills to make friends then why do you keep complaining here about not being able to talk to anyone? i don't get it [editline]29th October 2013[/editline] and a romantic relationship is a type of friendship, if you can't be okay with talking to people and just being friends with them then you're not going to get any further.[/QUOTE] If I see a girl who I think is attractive my brain turns to mush and I can't think of anything to say even if I don't think about dating her. I only avoid this with my female friends because I've become comfortable with them through exposure and joining in on conversations when they're talking to my guy friends.
why would you think it's possible to pursue a relationship with someone you can't even talk to?
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;42691791]why would you think it's possible to pursue a relationship with someone you can't even talk to?[/QUOTE] I know that's impossible. I want to be able to talk to girls that I think are attractive other than those I'm already friends with or girls on the internet. I know the way to do this is exposure, but it's hard to do that when your brain turns to mush and if you forced yourself to say something you would just end up saying hi so quietly they can barely hear it.
Every time you do that silly thing you're doing picture the girl having a boyfriend or a massive 12 inch cock - whichever stops you thinking of her as a potential partner; and just talk to her like.. you know, a person?
[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;42691862]I know that's impossible. I want to be able to talk to girls that I think are attractive other than those I'm already friends with or girls on the internet. I know the way to do this is exposure, but it's hard to do that when your brain turns to mush and if you forced yourself to say something you would just end up saying hi so quietly they can barely hear it.[/QUOTE] stop focusing on the idea of them being a potential partner. if you go up and talk to someone do it because they look like they would be interesting to talk to, not because you want to try and convince them to date you. [editline]29th October 2013[/editline] you can't fake most things. if you're talking to someone because you want to go out with them they're going to know, and if you try and pretend that isn't the entire reason you're there it's just going to make you look like a scumbag. if someone falls for you it's going to be because they like your personality how you NATURALLY are, not because they like whatever facade you put on.
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