Super Friendly Social and Love Advice V6 - JUST FUCKING ASK HER OUT
11,088 replies, posted
I had a girl who cancelled on me for like a month straight with the excuse of being sick. And she talked to me less and less until it was obvious she just didn't want anything to do with me. I didn't jump to conclusions easily because we had several dates that went really well until that point.
Usually you're wrong when you think of the worst situation like that, but it really sucks if you're ever right. And it's hard to get over that trust issue that you could just be strung along. At least it was for me.
[QUOTE=Exigent;44228856]So I just took some personality tests, due to me and a friend being bored. We both pretty much got the same results, but they kind of bothered me. Like it genuinely has made me upset that these labels may be true..
[IMG]http://i.imgur.com/imJ7C3I.png[/IMG]
Me and my friend are currently in a deep discussion. Like we've never talked like this before. I don't know, after thinking about it, we're both pretty unhappy with our lives at the moment. Feels bad.[/QUOTE]
Oh my god, who would make something like this? "Dangerous potential flaws"? This will keep people with mood disorders up for weeks...
So there's this girl that I've liked for the past 5 years that I try not to talk to as much because I'm getting increasingly busy and because they are not feelings I want to have for someone that can't reciprocate, really wanted to talk to me, or rather it was her first time getting drunk (really drunk too) and her friend took care of her but she really wanted to talk to me.
I've been drunk plenty of times but I don't seem to be drunk in the same way that everyone is, that is when I'm drunk, physically, everything goes to shit, reflexes, fine motor skills, balance, etc. However in my mind, although a bit slow, I remain level-headed and very calm, I'm pretty much just smoother when I'm drunk so I'm not sure it works the same way it does for me than it does for other so she asked me something weird.
She asked me if I wanted to be her boyfriend and I feel that's a bad thing, I can never tell what drunk people are really thinking, are they sincere? Do they just say random shit? Try to get a kick out of you? As I said, I can't tell because I'm more or less the same when I drink so I don't know the thought process of someone that's the outgoing drunk type.
Sorry if I'm making no sense, like 5 in the morning and I don't know what the fuck to think of that.
Maybe you just think youre the same but youre not?
In any way Id probably talk to her or something. Maybe if she didnt mean it you could just use it as an excuse to ask her out.
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;44231939]Oh my god, who would make something like this? "Dangerous potential flaws"? This will keep people with mood disorders up for weeks...[/QUOTE]
Having briefly skimmed the description apparantly the maker was tired of the personality tests that stress the unchanging value of a personality, and they wanted to make one to find things to help you change to be a better person (if you so wish)
sadly all this is true
[IMG]http://i.imgur.com/CCQEW2M.png[/IMG]
So tomorrow the girl is coming over to hang out with me in my dorm. I've never been alone in a private place with a girl I'm interested in before, what the fuck do I do?
stop doing terrible tests and just act upon how you think you'll make people happy
[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;44238108]So tomorrow the girl is coming over to hang out with me in my dorm. I've never been alone in a private place with a girl I'm interested in before, what the fuck do I do?[/QUOTE]
Speaking from personal experience you [b]have[/b] to make a move. I was alone with a girl in my car in the middle of the night and I was nervous and did nothing but talk. And because she invited me to be alone with her and I didn't do anything, I ended up taking her home and she walked out feeling like a slut. And it went downhill from there.
I'm not saying that will be the exact same scenario for you but if she invites you to be alone with her or agrees to your invite, she knows what's going to go down.
[QUOTE=HighdefGE;44238388]Speaking from personal experience you [b]have[/b] to make a move. I was alone with a girl in my car in the middle of the night and I was nervous and did nothing but talk. And because she invited me to be alone with her and I didn't do anything, I ended up taking her home and she walked out feeling like a slut. And it went downhill from there.
I'm not saying that will be the exact same scenario for you but if she invites you to be alone with her or agrees to your invite, she knows what's going to go down.[/QUOTE]
Ok so let me get this straight she felt like a slut cause you guys went to hang out alone and didn't do anything sexual? I'm really not following the logic.
I'm just gonna say no thats not true for all (or maybe even most) girls.
[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;44238108]So tomorrow the girl is coming over to hang out with me in my dorm. I've never been alone in a private place with a girl I'm interested in before, what the fuck do I do?[/QUOTE]
Don't go full sexual ape.
[QUOTE=HighdefGE;44238388]Speaking from personal experience you [b]have[/b] to make a move. I was alone with a girl in my car in the middle of the night and I was nervous and did nothing but talk. And because she invited me to be alone with her and I didn't do anything, I ended up taking her home and she walked out feeling like a slut. And it went downhill from there.
I'm not saying that will be the exact same scenario for you but if she invites you to be alone with her or agrees to your invite, she knows what's going to go down.[/QUOTE]
How the fuck does hanging out with a girl alone and not doing something sexual with her make her feel like a slut? This has to be the most illogical post I have ever seen.
I'm not planning on making a move unless she gives me obvious signs that she wants me to. As much as I do like her, I also value our friendship and don't want to fuck it up with unwanted sexual advances.
It could have been that her main intent had been to have sex, and as the accompanying party didn't respond to the desire, she may have simply felt as though she were an overly sexual person.
Or maybe she was simply disappointed and never said she felt like a slut. Because she invited him and all.
[editline]15th March 2014[/editline]
[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;44238760]I'm not planning on making a move unless she gives me obvious signs that she wants me to. As much as I do like her, I also value our friendship and don't want to fuck it up with unwanted sexual advances.[/QUOTE]
As I said before, when shes giving you obvious signs/doing things herself it means you should have done those things yourself long ago. And if you dont want to ruin the friendship that means youre fine in the friendzone I guess.
Either way you're just making excuses in your head not to do what you really want to do
[QUOTE=Akasori;44233216]It's quite spot-on.
[img]http://i.imgur.com/0TlxXcw.png[/img][/QUOTE]
It's not really though, it asks the same question in different ways multiple times, its illogical in a lot of ways and a lot of the questions were slated weirdly
mine correlated with some aspects well and not others, its just like any other quiz really
[editline]15th March 2014[/editline]
[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;44238760]How the fuck does hanging out with a girl alone and not doing something sexual with her make her feel like a slut? This has to be the most illogical post I have ever seen.
I'm not planning on making a move unless she gives me obvious signs that she wants me to. As much as I do like her, I also value our friendship and don't want to fuck it up with unwanted sexual advances.[/QUOTE]
You've been on a date with her and now you're gonna be alone in your room together. Do she need to be any clearer?
[QUOTE=killerteacup;44242504]You've been on a date with her and now you're gonna be alone in your room together. Do she need to be any clearer?[/QUOTE]
Or he could just wait and see if she initiates anything instead of assuming that's what she wants.
[editline]15th March 2014[/editline]
[QUOTE=D3TBS;44242470]As I said before, when shes giving you obvious signs/doing things herself it means you should have done those things yourself long ago.[/QUOTE]
God forbid women make sexual advances first instead of playing hard-to-get.
Not playing hard to get, more too shy and nervous to make the move themselves when they want
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;44242885]Or he could just wait and see if she initiates anything instead of assuming that's what she wants.
[/QUOTE]
He could do that too
well I assume most people don't follow D3TBS's bad advice already anyway
[QUOTE=RenegadeCop;44243801]Did you just make a sweeping statement about women?
Because that's a bad thing to do when talking about relationships, every person on earth is different.[/QUOTE]
So what should I do? Assume that shes different with no info at all?
[QUOTE=D3TBS;44244905]So what should I do? Assume that shes different with no info at all?[/QUOTE]
maybe you shouldn't assume at all
and just stare at a girl with a blank face because I don't want to assume anything?
Hi guys,
So I have this situation going on here. I've been thinking and fantasizing about this girl on my university campus. I am a recent freshman student. Same as her. However I did not have these feelings for last semester. It was only at the end of semester, I met her somewhere and talked to her for a bit but indirectly because there was a lot of people. I hope you understood that.
After getting to know very little info about her, I kinda had feelings. It's now the 6th week of the second semester and I saw this girl at a gathering. I couldn't talk to her much because he was organizing the event and she was busy. Even though I did talk for her a bit, she generally seemed responsive and found what I said quite funny, since I say funny things a lot.
So I would like to ask Facepunch, I am planning to send her a Facebook message and introduce myself a little bit, since I only asked her questions, I never said much about me. Do you think this is a good idea? Hopefully I will talk a little bit online, try to avoid getting to know her through Facebook and meet later to officially know her better (ask her out).
Hope to hear some opinions! :smile:
[QUOTE=RenegadeCop;44246043]Facebook is more of a thing you use after you already know someone decently.
I don't like facebook chatting at all though, so I might be biased.
You're better off doing introductions offline, though. Keep small talk and conversations to online.[/QUOTE]
They have already met in person a few times if small, so it seems decent to use it as a place to talk a bit and arrange a meet up
i think id just ask her out and introduce her when youre already out.
Just a word of advice for lonely strangers lurking the thread: If you think that the girl randomly flirting with you is someone else playing a prank but aren't entirely sure, ask them to ring you so you get to hear their voice. It's probably gonna seem obvious to many people in this thread but when in the excitement of it all (especially if girls never flirt with you normally) it's easy to forget the possibility that it might not be real. Don't do what I did and come to the realization too late.
This won't apply to a lot of the posters as they probably already know this/don't have to put up with it.
Well the girl came over, we watched a movie together and cuddled through over half of it. She was kind of shaky when we were cuddling though. Sign of nervousness? And should I be worried about that or assume it was because she probably likes me?
I don't know the history between you two, but it sure does sound like nervousness. Sounds cute actually, trembling in your arms haha. I'm sure it was nothing bad at all.
My Friday night date with my old college crush was a terrific mismatch. She was a nice girl, and super hot, and we talked easily enough, but there was just no zest to it at all. Of course, I was a bit preoccupied thinking about Cute Weeaboo Girl, so it may not have been a totally fair shake, bit either way, we just weren't able to click. I ended up leaving early.
Today, however, was a different story. Cute Weeaboo Girl and I met for the first time and went on our first date, and it was great from start to finish-- all seven hours of it. She is flippin adorable. It may be a bit weird, seeing as how I'm 6'6", but I am very attracted to short, petite girls. She's 4'9, and barely 90lbs, and totally bonkers cute. We probably look like an odd pair, but none of my previous dates or girlfriends have been this solidly "my type," and I feel a bit like dancing when I look at her.
She's a riot, too. We had a blast swapping stories and teasing each other, and the conversation was never dull. Our first stop was lunch, pizza, and after we went to the theater to catch the first thing showing (Monuments Men). A few minutes in, I take her hand, and a few minutes after that, her thigh. When I kissed her hand, she caught me by surprise by quickly pulling herself up and kissing [I]me![/I] Afterwards, she wrapped her entire body around my arm (which is about the length of her entire body, anyway!) and spent the rest of the film with her head on my shoulder. It was very sweet.
The movie was my favorite part of the night, but afterwards we went for coffee and talked for another hour or so. Still a blast, but unfortunately lacking in arm-hugging, which is now one of my favorite things.
I haven't clicked like this with a first date in ages, so I'm feeling pretty damn optimistic about things. But, I'm also a bit worried. Before the end of summer, I'm moving halfway across the country. I haven't mentioned that to her yet, because I'm having a great time. I hadn't planned on actually starting a legitimate relationship with anyone, just some casual dating for fun, but this one is accidentally turning into the real deal. I'm scared to tell her for fear that if will end now, but know I have to soon, because it's doomed to end in only a couple of months anyway, and it's not right to let her get any more emotionally invested without telling her first.
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