Super Friendly Social and Love Advice V6 - JUST FUCKING ASK HER OUT
11,088 replies, posted
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;45284735]Blame my edgy 16-year-old self for the confusing name.[/QUOTE]
I still find your user hilarious in a good way :v:
My friend keeps on going on about this girl he wants me to talk to, it makes me feel so awkward. :v:
[QUOTE=orcywoo6;45291416]My friend keeps on going on about this girl he wants me to talk to, it makes me feel so awkward. :v:[/QUOTE]
You know what's more awkward? Everyone thinks I have this thing for a girl because I was looking for her, she was the only person I knew (party with my job, there were 5000 people, yes thousand.) and they keep bringing it up infront of my mom, as if I have a thing with her. I barely even talked to her.
[url=http://www.usatoday.com/longform/news/nation/2014/06/25/stigma-of-mental-illness/9875351]Wanted to share an article I found a few days back[/url]. Might not be relevant to a lot of you from Europe/Canada but it really drives me insane how shitty the US's attitude is on mental health care.
TL;DR: Most insurance doesn't cover mental health care or full-time residence at mental hospitals. Government thinks this is a good way to "incentivize" mental health professionals to "serve people where they ought to be served" (meaning at home).
If you're an inpatient at a mental hospital, it means you're a threat to either yourself or society. Govt/insurance companies think it's a good idea to keep those people out of inpatient care. If you look at [url=http://qz.com/37015/how-school-killings-in-the-us-stack-up-against-36-other-countries-put-together/]how many school shootings have happened in just the last decade in our country compared to the rest of the world[/url] you can see just how dysfunctional this attitude toward mental health is.
Drives me up the fucking wall.
There are also some pretty depressing graphs... Apparently only 21% of Americans would willingly become friends with someone with depression. Compared to 35% for schizophrenia...? I don't understand.
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;45296545][url=http://www.usatoday.com/longform/news/nation/2014/06/25/stigma-of-mental-illness/9875351]Wanted to share an article I found a few days back[/url]. Might not be relevant to a lot of you from Europe/Canada but it really drives me insane how shitty the US's attitude is on mental health care.
TL;DR: Most insurance doesn't cover mental health care or full-time residence at mental hospitals. Government thinks this is a good way to "incentivize" mental health professionals to "serve people where they ought to be served" (meaning at home).
If you're an inpatient at a mental hospital, it means you're a threat to either yourself or society. Govt/insurance companies think it's a good idea to keep those people out of inpatient care. If you look at [url=http://qz.com/37015/how-school-killings-in-the-us-stack-up-against-36-other-countries-put-together/]how many school shootings have happened in just the last decade in our country compared to the rest of the world[/url] you can see just how dysfunctional this attitude toward mental health is.
Drives me up the fucking wall.
There are also some pretty depressing graphs... Apparently only 21% of Americans would willingly become friends with someone with depression. Compared to 35% for schizophrenia...? I don't understand.[/QUOTE]
I've seen numbers about how people don't want to be friends with depressed people before and it's ridiculous, I also think almost all of it is because of a lack of information. The average person who doesn't have or directly know someone with depression or other mental illnesses knows basically nothing about them. A lot more awareness and information is needed about these sorts of things, especially issues like depression and bipolar disorders, which are extremely common.
Multiple Personality disorders especially seems to be lacking in information, or more accurately is drowning in misinformation because of popular media bullshit.
Mental health care in the US is shite, but mental health awareness almost seems as bad in most of US and Canada (can't speak for anywhere else, but we have all been through high school, I expect we have all heard multiple people say "I'm so bipolar" when they have a quick topic mood change in conversation or some equally trivial bs). I feel like information like that would be far more useful to the average person than knowing how to do some of the advanced math I remember having to learn to graduate.
Happiness attracts people like a contagious disease. If you look gloomy then it's difficult for others to notice you.
Why is it confusing that people don't want to be friends with people who are depressed? People want to be around fun and interesting people, not miserable people.
i have a date coming up :x
never ignore the thread title
Where do I go to find a good girl ? :o
[QUOTE=FlashMarsh;45303193]Why is it confusing that people don't want to be friends with people who are depressed? People want to be around fun and interesting people, not miserable people.[/QUOTE]
If you read the sentence immediately following the one you're acting condescending toward, you might notice that the reason I had a problem with it is because people seem to think schizophrenia is a more "attractive" disorder in friends. It doesn't make any sense that a severe mental condition like schizophrenia would draw people in.
[editline]5th July 2014[/editline]
And here's the chart I was referencing.
[img]http://usatoday30.usatoday.com/longform/mental_health/stigma_graphic.jpg[/img]
As you can see, Americans are more willing to socialize with schizophrenics than depressed people, in spite of viewing schizophrenia as a more dangerous/violent disorder.
Damn, I just went on like my first real date today and it was hella rad. Holding hands and just walking around talking. Fuck, the thread title is right, you just have to fucking ask her out.
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;45304618]If you read the sentence immediately following the one you're acting condescending toward, you might notice that the reason I had a problem with it is because people seem to think schizophrenia is a more "attractive" disorder in friends. It doesn't make any sense that a severe mental condition like schizophrenia would draw people in.
[editline]5th July 2014[/editline]
And here's the chart I was referencing.
[IMG]http://usatoday30.usatoday.com/longform/mental_health/stigma_graphic.jpg[/IMG]
As you can see, Americans are more willing to socialize with schizophrenics than depressed people, in spite of viewing schizophrenia as a more dangerous/violent disorder.[/QUOTE]
It's also beyond saying that depressed people can be a bit of a downer to be around when they are having a low mood, but saying they do not want to interact with these people at all because they suffer from a mental illness. That is incredibly unfair to a person, and it is also important to remember that just because someone has diagnosed depression, they aren't necessarily depressed all the time, and can be perfectly good friends (if possibly a bit more sensitive and needing some help a bit more often, but that can be true of anyone really) but people in these studies are saying "i do not want to be friends with anyone with diagnosed depression"
In one of the studies I read (or maybe a TED talk? It's been a while i'm not totally sure) people literally said that if one of their friends got diagnosed with depression they would stop being friends with them.
Never thought I'd have to turn to advice but here we go.
I've been in a long distance relationship with my best friend of 4 years since February. Things started off quite well, but started to go to shit around May. She started to be gone at random intervals, sometimes taking a day or more to respond while in the middle of a conversation. I understand people have lives, but it doesn't help that Skype is stuck showing them as "Online" all the time since they apparently don't know how to log out of the Skype app on their phone. Then I just stopped doing calls with her altogether since every time I left and came back, her mic was muted, therefore defeating the whole point of it.
Fast forward to now I wanted to try to remedy things and try a call again, so on Tuesday she said "oh well not right now maybe wednesday if i'm not doing anything" So I asked again on Wednesday, nothing. Thursday, nothing. Friday, nothing but I wasn't too worried about that since it [I]was[/I] the 4th of July.
I try again on Saturday, and her status randomly updates with "wow okay yeah im done im just fucking finished". This was probably directed towards me, so I just left this and went to bed;
[QUOTE] Well, I didn't mean to piss you off, if that was indeed directed towards me. I'm just going to stop now to keep this from becoming an even bigger shitshow than it already is. I'm done, me worrying about this shit isn't going to help either of us so plain and simple; I'm done trying to get in touch, [I]you[/I] can come talk to me whenever you feel is right. Actually sticking to my word for once, see you eventually, I guess.[/QUOTE]
Wake up, and see no response besides her status has changed back to generic song lyrics. Even if I seemed like an asshole in what I left, I [I]don't[/I] want things to be destroyed just because of my petty impatience. I'm at a loss here besides waiting and see what happens. I'm done trying to talk to them if that is all that I'm going to get for a response.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
You've done the right thing in making a stand, now you just have to see how it pans out and whether you're worth her time or not, which, on the one hand this might make her talk to you, on the other, you might never hear from her again. Whichever way it goes, you're better off knowing one way or another.
It's not really impatience on your half, its you being jerked around for whatever reason (whether tis just life getting in the way, or she's ditched you or whatever).
[QUOTE=VietRooster2;45308745]Never thought I'd have to turn to advice but here we go.
I've been in a long distance relationship with my best friend of 4 years since February. Things started off quite well, but started to go to shit around May. She started to be gone at random intervals, sometimes taking a day or more to respond while in the middle of a conversation. I understand people have lives, but it doesn't help that Skype is stuck showing them as "Online" all the time since they apparently don't know how to log out of the Skype app on their phone. Then I just stopped doing calls with her altogether since every time I left and came back, her mic was muted, therefore defeating the whole point of it.
Fast forward to now I wanted to try to remedy things and try a call again, so on Tuesday she said "oh well not right now maybe wednesday if i'm not doing anything" So I asked again on Wednesday, nothing. Thursday, nothing. Friday, nothing but I wasn't too worried about that since it [I]was[/I] the 4th of July.
I try again on Saturday, and her status randomly updates with "wow okay yeah im done im just fucking finished". This was probably directed towards me, so I just left this and went to bed;
Wake up, and see no response besides her status has changed back to generic song lyrics. Even if I seemed like an asshole in what I left, I [I]don't[/I] want things to be destroyed just because of my petty impatience. I'm at a loss here besides waiting and see what happens. I'm done trying to talk to them if that is all that I'm going to get for a response.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated.[/QUOTE]
If she was busy, it would take her 5 minutes to explain that. Considering she hasn't, I wouldn't bother any further with her until she decides to show some maturity and give you the time of day, or at least explain herself. Don't make any more effort with her. It's not worth it.
a friend of mine who is a girl invited me to go hiking with her. at night. i feel as though this is probably a sign since she's been acting weird around me lately.
[editline]7th July 2014[/editline]
she either likes me or plans to frame me for rape
Hike inside her cavern walls.
gonna go spelunking
Bf and I are moving over to his parents' house tomorrow. Originally it wasn't going to be until August but his mom called two days ago and asked us to move now.
Pretty excited. Trying to think of something to do to celebrate (aside from drinking and swimming).
make a feast. just steaks and spareribs everywhere
[QUOTE=Zar;45315410]make a feast. just steaks and spareribs everywhere[/QUOTE]
Haha, if only I had the energy to clean their kitchen too... Starting to wonder if the whole thing with giving us 3 days of notice to move so his mom could go to Russia for a month was an elaborate plan to get us to clean their house.
so
embarassing but I'm talking about it anyawy
girlfriend and I are both young, in our teens
was uhh
getting frisky today
she told me to slip my fingers in there
so I did
put one in, she told me two
what I wasn't expecting was there to be blood everywhere
so I'm kind of panicking now
is this experience normal? she said she's not on her period or anything? did I cut her?
[QUOTE=Dick Slamfist;45323689]so
embarassing but I'm talking about it anyawy
girlfriend and I are both young, in our teens
was uhh
getting frisky today
she told me to slip my fingers in there
so I did
put one in, she told me two
what I wasn't expecting was there to be blood everywhere
so I'm kind of panicking now
is this experience normal? she said she's not on her period or anything? did I cut her?[/QUOTE]
Was it her first time?
you killed her, it's only a matter of time until she becomes a shallow husk, like a deflated beach ball
[QUOTE=Dub!;45323708]Was it her first time?[/QUOTE]
I'd fingered her once before. Other than that nothings been up there.
she's as awkward if not more awkward than I am but fucking hell do I like her something crazy
[QUOTE=Dick Slamfist;45323769]I'd fingered her once before. Other than that nothings been up there.
she's as awkward if not more awkward than I am but fucking hell do I like her something crazy[/QUOTE]
That's why she bled m8. If it's her first time her hymen would have broke therefore blood. Buckle up with a condom.
[QUOTE=Dub!;45323838]That's why she bled m8. If it's her first time her hymen would have broke therefore blood. Buckle up with a condom.[/QUOTE]
No, that's not really how that works.
The hymen usually erodes on its own, it's not incredibly common for it to get "popped" during sex.
Bleeding during sex for other reasons is fairly common, it's possible it happened due to dryness/friction or your nails.
[editline]7th July 2014[/editline]
And I don't think it's really necessary to use a condom on your two fingers...
thanks for the moral supporrt
I've been really embarassed to talk to my friends about this because I've seriously lagged behind them when it comes to sexuality, they all started blossoming about 16 or so and I'm 18 and only just starting so I feel like an idiot around them for not knowing anything at all
I'm not much of a porn watcher so I've had no idea what to do this entire time. Just my best, I guess. Luckily she's kind of awkward as well so I think we're both clueless.
I've been so nervous I've been shaking and pale that I fucked up her baby factory or something
[QUOTE=Dick Slamfist;45323929]thanks for the moral supporrt
I've been really embarassed to talk to my friends about this because I've seriously lagged behind them when it comes to sexuality, they all started blossoming about 16 or so and I'm 18 and only just starting so I feel like an idiot around them for not knowing anything at all
I'm not much of a porn watcher so I've had no idea what to do this entire time. Just my best, I guess. Luckily she's kind of awkward as well so I think we're both clueless.
I've been so nervous I've been shaking and pale that I fucked up her baby factory or something[/QUOTE]
You're fine man. :) Don't sweat it. How'd she react?
[QUOTE=Splash Attack;45259732]So I started talking to this girl a few months ago... We went on a few dates and stuff too. I started feeling a little pessimistic like it wasn't going much of anywhere. Then I met this new girl and I broke things off with girl 1. She was pretty pissed for a while. Shortly after things didn't work out with girl 2, girl 1 texts me again. She says that we could still be friends and that she's over the whole ordeal. So we start talking again.
Now, here I am. I'm really starting to like girl 1 again. I talked to my cousin (girl 1's best friend). According to her, she doesn't trust me anymore and it is going to take a lot for this to go anywhere.
I'm not sure what to do here. On one hand, I really don't like the idea of having to prove oneself to even start a relationship. On the other, I really like this girl and can see us really going somewhere. What do you guys think?[/QUOTE]
Suck it up and start by apologizing.
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