Super Friendly Social and Love Advice V6 - JUST FUCKING ASK HER OUT

[Electroholic]

[QUOTE=Rhenae;40113367]You get shy and start worrying about what they think of you.[/QUOTE]
That's probably correct, but I have no interest in them, so there is no reason I [I]should [/I]care about what they think of me. I need to learn how to ignore it somehow and just act normally :tinfoil:

[Rhenae]

[QUOTE=Electroholic;40113416]That's probably correct, but I have no interest in them, so there is no reason I [I]should [/I]care about what they think of me. I need to learn how to ignore it somehow and just act normally :tinfoil:[/QUOTE]

Practice makes near-perfect. Next time just don't allow yourself to start avoiding them.

[G3rman]

Hey, I need some help making a nice excuse to not have to use my car. Basically this girl that I don't want to date (just throwing this out there) wants to know if I have a car so we can hang out. This means that I will have to take her places and drive in terrible traffic of the big city which I hate more than anything.

Compound the fact that my car is basically out of gas and I really don't want to go anywhere unless I actually plan on doing my full supermarket trip (groceries, dinner, gas), I really don't want to have to drive anywhere.

Even if I have to tell her I don't want to drive, what is the best way to word it? Generally I don't have a problem doing this but the girl I'm talking to is someone I don't know very well, but I know enough that she is emotionally fragile and I don't want to hurt her feelings.

[sp]This sounds so complicated for such a simple issue.[/sp]

[Rhenae]

[QUOTE=G3rman;40113444]Hey, I need some help making a nice excuse to not have to use my car. Basically this girl that I don't want to date (just throwing this out there) wants to know if I have a car so we can hang out. This means that I will have to take her places and drive in terrible traffic of the big city which I hate more than anything.

Compound the fact that my car is basically out of gas and I really don't want to go anywhere unless I actually plan on doing my full supermarket trip (groceries, dinner, gas), I really don't want to have to drive anywhere.

Even if I have to tell her I don't want to drive, what is the best way to word it? Generally I don't have a problem doing this but the girl I'm talking to is someone I don't know very well, but I know enough that she is emotionally fragile and I don't want to hurt her feelings.

[sp]This sounds so complicated for such a simple issue.[/sp][/QUOTE]

You need to stop making excuses and let her know you don't want to hang out with her?

[G3rman]

[QUOTE=Rhenae;40113478]You need to stop making excuses and let her know you don't want to hang out with her?[/QUOTE]

I don't mind hanging out with her whenever we see each other at school, I just don't want to drive anywhere. It's me being lazy, really.

But I see your point; if I make the excuse now I'll have to make it later.

[Rhenae]

[QUOTE=G3rman;40113497]I don't mind hanging out with her whenever we see each other at school, I just don't want to drive anywhere. It's me being lazy, really.

But I see your point; if I make the excuse now I'll have to make it later.[/QUOTE]

Or just tell her the truth?

[OogalaBoogal]

[QUOTE=Rhenae;40113584]Or just tell her the truth?[/QUOTE]

I'd post that gif if I knew I wouldn't get banned for it.

You should tell her how you feel, although it would look incredibly lame imo. Just go get your groceries and gas and then proceed to make out in your car.

[Fire Kracker]

just tell her you're too lazy to drive

[editline]1st April 2013[/editline]

or you know try hanging out with her

usually i don't want to do anything with my friends until i go out and actually do it but if they ask me i'd be like nah i'm busy

[G3rman]

[QUOTE=OogalaBoogal;40113637]I'd post that gif if I knew I wouldn't get banned for it.

You should tell her how you feel, although it would look incredibly lame imo. Just go get your groceries and gas and then proceed to make out in your car.[/QUOTE]

Genius, why haven't I thought of this before?

[Heigou]

every girls i fancied told me no, hlep

[G3rman]

[QUOTE=Heigou;40113705]every girls i fancied told me no, hlep[/QUOTE]

What kind of a no was it?

Was it a 'no I won't not have sex with you' or was it a 'no, I don't want to dance the tango'?

Big difference.

[Heigou]

htey dont' want nto tango ufdig

[Splash Attack]

[t]http://i.imgur.com/hcA8rTf.png[/t]

Making plans and I can not figure out for the life of me what she is getting at.

Any ideas?

[jbthekid]

Looks like she thinks you're flirting and she made an attempt to flirt back. Make a move!

[Splash Attack]

[QUOTE=jbthekid;40113852]Looks like she thinks you're flirting and she made an attempt to flirt back. Make a move![/QUOTE]

We're already dating.

[Electroholic]

You said you free that night and I think she thought you were hinting at sex or something with that winky face.

[thisispain]

[QUOTE=Splash Attack;40113840][t]http://i.imgur.com/hcA8rTf.png[/t]

Making plans and I can not figure out for the life of me what she is getting at.

Any ideas?[/QUOTE]

just a flirt
be cool man

[OogalaBoogal]

[QUOTE=Heigou;40113835]htey dont' want nto tango ufdig[/QUOTE]

they're will be girls who want to. don't worry.

[editline]1st April 2013[/editline]

[QUOTE=Splash Attack;40113840][t]http://i.imgur.com/hcA8rTf.png[/t]

Making plans and I can not figure out for the life of me what she is getting at.

Any ideas?[/QUOTE]

she's using my trademark c: smiley. this is unacceptable.

[editline]1st April 2013[/editline]

but yeah she's probably just being cutesy.

[Splash Attack]

[QUOTE=Electroholic;40113893]You said you free that night and I think she thought you were hinting at sex or something with that winky face.[/QUOTE]

That's what I was kinda thinking, but we had our first date just Friday (although we did make out).

It sounds like she is very open to the idea of sex early on in a relationship, though.

[editline]31st March 2013[/editline]

[QUOTE=OogalaBoogal;40113952]they're will be girls who want to. don't worry.

[editline]1st April 2013[/editline]

she's using my trademark c: smiley. this is unacceptable.

[editline]1st April 2013[/editline]

but yeah she's probably just being cutesy.[/QUOTE]

I was using c:

[editline]31st March 2013[/editline]

My trademark as well. :v:

[fear me]

I third the c: trademark.

[thisispain]

:|

[Rhenae]

[QUOTE=Splash Attack;40113840][t]http://i.imgur.com/hcA8rTf.png[/t]

Making plans and I can not figure out for the life of me what she is getting at.

Any ideas?[/QUOTE]

She's just making fun of your winky face.

[G3rman]

I was honest and everything worked out.

You guys are geniuses!

[Plattack]

I feel like I posted this here before but at the same time I'm pretty sure every time I come here I erase my message and leave.

One of my friends knows that I like someone. Actually, a good portion of our mutual friends know I like someone. A good portion of our mutual friends also know that I like her, but I don't know that she does. She's tried on multiple occasions to guess who I like, but she hasn't guessed herself. One of my friends thinks she knows and is just being immature about it and waiting for me to ask her out. The rest of our mutual friends who know that I like her have also been nudging me to ask her out.

I've been thinking that it's all in my head, but then I just remembered the above and that we've been mistaken for going out three times in the last 4 months. The problem is every time I go up to her and we have a conversation I end up wussing out right when I'm about to ask her.

I know this isn't anyone's problem but my own. But I think after writing the above out, and erasing a large portion of it and then rewriting almost the exact same things, I can safely say that I'm a goddamn moron and should just read the thread title. Thank you.

[Rhenae]

[QUOTE=Plattack;40114444]I feel like I posted this here before but at the same time I'm pretty sure every time I come here I erase my message and leave.

One of my friends knows that I like someone. Actually, a good portion of our mutual friends know I like someone. A good portion of our mutual friends also know that I like her, but I don't know that she does. She's tried on multiple occasions to guess who I like, but she hasn't guessed herself. One of my friends thinks she knows and is just being immature about it and waiting for me to ask her out. The rest of our mutual friends who know that I like her have also been nudging me to ask her out.

I've been thinking that it's all in my head, but then I just remembered the above and that we've been mistaken for going out three times in the last 4 months. The problem is every time I go up to her and we have a conversation I end up wussing out right when I'm about to ask her.

I know this isn't anyone's problem but my own. But I think after writing the above out, and erasing a large portion of it and then rewriting almost the exact same things, I can safely say that I'm a goddamn moron and should just read the thread title. Thank you.[/QUOTE]

Guessing at who you like, I know very few girls who would guess themselves, but would use bringing it up as a sort of nudge at you because they want you to say it's them.
But yes, as the title says just ask her out. You'll never know otherwise and it's better to have tried.

[Splash Attack]

[QUOTE=Plattack;40114444]I feel like I posted this here before but at the same time I'm pretty sure every time I come here I erase my message and leave.

One of my friends knows that I like someone. Actually, a good portion of our mutual friends know I like someone. A good portion of our mutual friends also know that I like her, but I don't know that she does. She's tried on multiple occasions to guess who I like, but she hasn't guessed herself. One of my friends thinks she knows and is just being immature about it and waiting for me to ask her out. The rest of our mutual friends who know that I like her have also been nudging me to ask her out.

I've been thinking that it's all in my head, but then I just remembered the above and that we've been mistaken for going out three times in the last 4 months. The problem is every time I go up to her and we have a conversation I end up wussing out right when I'm about to ask her.

I know this isn't anyone's problem but my own. But I think after writing the above out, and erasing a large portion of it and then rewriting almost the exact same things, I can safely say that I'm a goddamn moron and should just read the thread title. Thank you.[/QUOTE]

One thing that helps me is telling yourself that you HAVE to ask her out no matter what. Don't think about the consequences and just be blunt and ask her flat out.

It's kept me from pussying out and letting the situation drag too long.

[editline]31st March 2013[/editline]

[QUOTE=Rhenae;40114179]She's just making fun of your winky face.[/QUOTE]

I don't quite get what she's making fun of, but ill roll with it I guess. :v:

[OogalaBoogal]

[QUOTE=Rhenae;40114463]Guessing at who you like, I know very few girls who would guess themselves, but would use bringing it up as a sort of nudge at you because they want you to say it's them.
But yes, as the title says just ask her out. [B]You'll never know otherwise and it's better to have tried.[/B][/QUOTE]

This has been my largest problem with asking people out my whole life. I had it in my mind that not trying>failing, and that's horribly incorrect. I now take every shot I can!

[GoldenGnome]

[QUOTE=thisispain;40114144]:|[/QUOTE]

king of all emoticons

well except for B^U

[Riku2211]

Welp, I'm back with my own situation again. I've been lurking around but I haven't had much time to actually read the thread. I'll try to be a bit more present.

Anyway, the girl I first came in here about, I said we started being friends again, and that was all fine and dandy. Now we're talking about getting back together. We both thought we'd be fine in the middle, she knew I had feelings for her still and she over time told me she had feelings for me as well, but we were just staying friends. We've decided we can't sit in the middle. We either get back together, or stop seeing eachother. And i mean, it's not gonna be like before, we'd at least say, like, "Hi" in the hallway and whatnot, and if we were to get back together it wouldn't be any sort of immediate thing. We just decided it's too confusing and difficult staying in the middle. We haven't reached a consensus on the matter yet. We probably won't for some time, she's got a lot of stuff to deal with this month and I told her she didn't need to worry about it until she got all the other stuff out of the way. She said she's leaning more toward getting back together, though.
I just hope we've really learned from our mistakes, which I do think we have, we've been talking about it quite a bit, and we realize the implication. She knows that there are relationships that go on and off and on and off and she doesn't want that and neither do I, but we are generally pretty sensible people, and if we see that happening, we're going to cut it off.

She's just still worried about our difference in interests, which I remember a couple threads ago someone said wasn't a factor in a relationship, or at least not a big enough one to decide whether it's a relationship or not. That was one of her reasons for ending it in the first place. I don't feel that it's a big deal, and that we can make it work; we HAVE things we like to do together. We both like watching movies (we used to watch movies and TV shows on DVD all the time), being outdoors, and she loves baking while I generally enjoy helping her out, though there isn't much a second person can do in baking. I'm not gonna go all into specifics. It's just that, she feels we are such different people, and I don't know how to argue my point that it doesn't matter. So how should I? I'm not saying I need to push her one way or the other, just that, I agree that we can make it work despite some differing interests, I just don't really know how to defend that. Whatever she decides to believe and whatever she decides to do is her choice.

As well as that, if we do end up getting back together, I'm going to try not to come to you guys TOO much, but I feel I will need some advice on how relationships generally work. Before, I thought we could just go with how we wanted to and it'd be fine, but clearly it didn't. I just don't understand, like, should we see eachother every day? Should we just be very casual? I don't know.

I'm going to bed, now, though, so if anyone responds I won't reply immediately. Thanks guys.

Also, what should be posted here and what should be posted in the Sex, Girlfriends and Shit thread? I don't want to be all asking for a whole bunch of advice that doesn't belong here.

[OogalaBoogal]

[QUOTE=riku2211;40114866]Welp, I'm back with my own situation again. I've been lurking around but I haven't had much time to actually read the thread. I'll try to be a bit more present.

Anyway, the girl I first came in here about, I said we started being friends again, and that was all fine and dandy. Now we're talking about getting back together. We both thought we'd be fine in the middle, she knew I had feelings for her still and she over time told me she had feelings for me as well, but we were just staying friends. We've decided we can't sit in the middle. We either get back together, or stop seeing eachother. And i mean, it's not gonna be like before, we'd at least say, like, "Hi" in the hallway and whatnot, and if we were to get back together it wouldn't be any sort of immediate thing. We just decided it's too confusing and difficult staying in the middle. We haven't reached a consensus on the matter yet. We probably won't for some time, she's got a lot of stuff to deal with this month and I told her she didn't need to worry about it until she got all the other stuff out of the way. She said she's leaning more toward getting back together, though.
I just hope we've really learned from our mistakes, which I do think we have, we've been talking about it quite a bit, and we realize the implication. She knows that there are relationships that go on and off and on and off and she doesn't want that and neither do I, but we are generally pretty sensible people, and if we see that happening, we're going to cut it off.

She's just still worried about our difference in interests, which I remember a couple threads ago someone said wasn't a factor in a relationship, or at least not a big enough one to decide whether it's a relationship or not. That was one of her reasons for ending it in the first place. I don't feel that it's a big deal, and that we can make it work; we HAVE things we like to do together. We both like watching movies (we used to watch movies and TV shows on DVD all the time), being outdoors, and she loves baking while I generally enjoy helping her out, though there isn't much a second person can do in baking. I'm not gonna go all into specifics. It's just that, she feels we are such different people, and I don't know how to argue my point that it doesn't matter. So how should I? I'm not saying I need to push her one way or the other, just that, I agree that we can make it work despite some differing interests, I just don't really know how to defend that. Whatever she decides to believe and whatever she decides to do is her choice.

As well as that, if we do end up getting back together, I'm going to try not to come to you guys TOO much, but I feel I will need some advice on how relationships generally work. Before, I thought we could just go with how we wanted to and it'd be fine, but clearly it didn't. I just don't understand, like, should we see eachother every day? Should we just be very casual? I don't know.

I'm going to bed, now, though, so if anyone responds I won't reply immediately. Thanks guys.

Also, what should be posted here and what should be posted in the Sex, Girlfriends and Shit thread? I don't want to be all asking for a whole bunch of advice that doesn't belong here.[/QUOTE]

I don't think that you should be too worried about the difference in interests, that doesn't often make or break a relationship, it's the chemistry that makes it. If you were together before and are gravitating towards each other now, then that might be a sign that you may have p good chemistry, and that it might be worth dating again.

When and if you start dating again, it'd probably be good to have things go pretty slowly, and try to cement a solid relationship, and not just jump into it. Keep your cool and everything will be fine!

If you post here or in SGS, you'll get advice from the same people, so don't worry about it too much. This thread is much more visible too. And I know I don't care if you post here a lot, I like giving advice!