Super Friendly Social and Love Advice V6 - JUST FUCKING ASK HER OUT
11,088 replies, posted
[QUOTE=Dick Slamfist;46070379]sooo was at my girlfriends house
her mother may have walked in while she had her shirt off
I'm not sure what I do in this situation. Walked home, obviously. Didn't protest anything. I feel like absolute shit. her parents really really really liked me, and I feel like I've shat all over their trust.[/QUOTE]
Ohno breasts! How old are you guys? There really is a point when I think parents should step off, getting mad at your kids for doing sexual stuff doesnt help and really wont change much.
Man the amount of times people would come in the room while I was shirtless(or at least bra-less) at the bfs place :v:
how was it for you? from a male perspective I'm just really embarassed that I let this happen, I should've known better than to push boundaries
I feel this is my fault.
[editline]25th September 2014[/editline]
I stress myself out over it so much I feel sick to my stomach with guilt. nobody said anything to me, just kind of a dissapointed stare.
Her mother was a teenage mother which is where a lot of the protection is coming from. I just feel bad.
It was usually his sister and no one ever noticed. I remember one time we stripped pants and has sex under a blanket on the counch downstairs, during which my dad came downstairs to tell us supper was ready. Blissfully ignorant hahaha
It would be embarassing, but I dont think either of our parents would have been too harsh on it if they did find out. I mean, his parents gave him condoms and I went and got a prescription for birth control not long after we started dating. Its not like they didnt know we were up to things.
the trouble here is that, really. My parents would probably laugh it off, her parents while not the prude type like I said teenage mother (I should re-iterate she's older now, obviously) I get the suspicion they don't want the same life for their daughter and are more protective. I'm pretty sure they saw me as this non threatening little ball of fluff that really liked movies.
her dad is legit scary as fuck but we would always bond over 80's films and now I'm worried he's going to hunt me down and crossbow me or something.
I just feel realy awful and I can keep saying it but the look of dissapointment on her mothers face as I trotted out the door stung. A few hours ago I was making french onion soup and everyone was sharing stories like a fun little family and then bam-
fucked your daughter.
She (Ladyfriend) seems more upset about it than I am. While I feel guilty she's got that added bonus of feeling responsible for some silly reason when really I should've stopped myself. Hormones are dumb and I'm slightly dumber.
Sigh.
Just lock the door? Did you just leave or did you get thrown out?
Probably not interesting to any of you, but I got off the pohone with my girlfriend
Apparently there was a long speech by her mother about how she's not mad or dissapointed but rather just worried her daughter would end up like her.
She was told explicitly that the parents still really really like me and that's half the reason they're not upset, is cause they know deep down I'm actually a good guy (According to them. My bank robbing career could still take off!) and I was told I'm always welcome over.
so we had a party last night and I got a few phone numbers
one girl i really liked talking to but if i remember the conversation correctly (i was at that pleasant drunk stage where I still remember everything) she gave me her number so when they had a party she could invite me in case I wasn't told about it otherwise .that was at like 11 but we talked until 1:30 when she left so I guess there was time for development, i don't know
my thing is i'm conflicted about texting about something other than party info. i liked talking to her but i was too drunk to remember if she liked talking to me too (although I guess we ended up talking for like four hours so she's either super patient and a doormat or she liked talking to me)
i could also just wait, she's bound to show up at another party we have. thoughts?
this is probably a simple question (based on the thread title I have an idea about the answer) but i don't have a lot of experience with this, so I don't know what to do
[QUOTE=Remedial Math;46078910]so we had a party last night and I got a few phone numbers
one girl i really liked talking to but if i remember the conversation correctly (i was at that pleasant drunk stage where I still remember everything) she gave me her number so when they had a party she could invite me in case I wasn't told about it otherwise .that was at like 11 but we talked until 1:30 when she left so I guess there was time for development, i don't know
my thing is i'm conflicted about texting about something other than party info. i liked talking to her but i was too drunk to remember if she liked talking to me too (although I guess we ended up talking for like four hours so she's either super patient and a doormat or she liked talking to me)
i could also just wait, she's bound to show up at another party we have. thoughts?
this is probably a simple question (based on the thread title I have an idea about the answer) but i don't have a lot of experience with this, so I don't know what to do[/QUOTE]
Just throw her a text
i guess that's probably what i should do
also someone pointed out to me that she wanted to make sure i was at a party if someone else didn't invite me, so i guess that's a good sign
I exchanged numbers with the girl I had the nice conversation with back on Wednesday, and we went bowling yesterday as a group and had a great time. Then at the end of the night, we all went home but her and I stayed up Skyping, it was pretty awesome. She has so much in common with me that I genuinely had difficulty believing it!
We're going out now to grab something to eat, and I'm not yet decided on it but we might go play pool. Looking forward to it.
I've also met a bunch more people from uni and am currently having a blast. Really can't wait for next week to start, since it's only going to get better.
[editline]26th September 2014[/editline]
Oh, and I am going to go to an Archery club bbq on Sunday, I think. Looking forward to that as well
might as well "update" since no one will care anyway
I sent her a text at like 11, she replied at about 1, i replied at about 3, and nothing since then. my idiot friend told me to abandon ship and i feel like he's being a bit pre-emptive.
[QUOTE=Remedial Math;46085552]might as well "update" since no one will care anyway
I sent her a text at like 11, she replied at about 1, i replied at about 3, and nothing since then. my idiot friend told me to abandon ship and i feel like he's being a bit pre-emptive.[/QUOTE]
Don't abandon the ship.
[QUOTE=5/3/4/3;46070666]There's chance that I might ask out a girl tomorrow and may or may not get a yes. Does anyone have tips/pointers on how to not be a nervous wreck?[/QUOTE]
[B]Update on this Mexican girl that my friends introduced me who I'm crushing and who I was going to ask out;[/B] I couldn't find her.
it's always her that sees me first, and even when i get the chance to talk to her, it's always a micro conversation followed by her leaving right after. i'm gonna try again when it's a more opportune time. It's nice though, because throughout my entire time in highschool, i never had a girl (who is a crush (bonus)) who would walk up to me and want to hug me.
[QUOTE=Banandana;46086429]Don't abandon the ship.[/QUOTE]
talked to her about it, she is apparently "not into dating" and right now is just looking to make friends
which is fine by me i guess, i still enjoy her company and to be honest i don't know her insanely well so for all i know it would have been a shitty relationship anyway
so for now i will just enjoy her company. also she's a total bro so i don't know if it's possible for women to be wingmen but she's going to do it anyway. those were her words.
Am I a bad person because I turned down someone based solely on the fact that I don't find them physically attractive.
Don't get me wrong I like them as a friend, but I feel absolutely no attraction to them whatsoever and I feel like shit about it.
I always told myself looks don't matter.
So here's the deal (somewhat my opinion so others can call me shallow if they want).
There's nothing wrong with rejecting someone because you don't find them attractive.
An important aspect of a relationship is to be physically and mentally attracted to someone. As you can see, that's two different points of attraction. The place where most people end up being shallow is when they only consider one, the physical aspect. This is why you have those douchy guys running around chasing girls simply for their looks, without any actual care of who they are on a more mental level. This is not to say that chasing a girl because you find her attractive is bad, (which is why you ask them out and get to know them on a mental level!) It's only bad when you don't care and only see them for their physical characteristics.
I don't know why people harp on others for this aspect of things; it's probably because physical characteristics can only sometimes be modified, and even then, only to a degree.
I can see where people think that a physical attraction is shallow, but the truth of it is, it's important. Not everyone is created the same, unfortunately, (and I say this knowing I'm not the best looking guy either, but I accept it) but that's how life seems to be working, at least in my perspective.
I just wouldn't stress about it. It's really just the stigma around guys chasing girls only considering physical traits as important.
[editline]27th September 2014[/editline]
Just to validate what I was saying, I broke up with my girlfriend. She was incredibly cute, but none of that matters when that mental aspect doesn't check out. We simply couldn't be together as we weren't completely compatible.
The trouble is they have some fairly major self esteem issues, and I know the second I tell them I'm not interested in them romantically they're going to assume its because they're ugly.
I just feel bad because I know they're going to think that no matter how I dress it up.
Some people work with others, some don't. If they can't accept that, then it's not something within your power or responsibility to try and fix or explain.
[editline]27th September 2014[/editline]
Just be courteous and respectful, that's all you can really do.
[QUOTE=RainbowStalin;46090811]The trouble is they have some fairly major self esteem issues, and I know the second I tell them I'm not interested in them romantically they're going to assume its because they're ugly.
I just feel bad because I know they're going to think that no matter how I dress it up.[/QUOTE]
i mean to be fair, that's a correct assumption
[QUOTE=RainbowStalin;46090690]Am I a bad person because I turned down someone based solely on the fact that I don't find them physically attractive.
Don't get me wrong I like them as a friend, but I feel absolutely no attraction to them whatsoever and I feel like shit about it.
I always told myself looks don't matter.[/QUOTE]
You are everything gone wrong with this world.
(not srs)
[QUOTE=Remedial Math;46091074]i mean to be fair, that's a correct assumption[/QUOTE]
There are so many factors that people consider when deciding to date someone and not just anyone that I'd go as far as to say that this statement is completely false. There are far more factors than just how someone looks and even though this is the case here, you'd be completely wrong to assume it's the reason.
[editline]27th September 2014[/editline]
The reasons not to date someone are endless
[QUOTE=Banandana;46091680]There are so many factors that people consider when deciding to date someone and not just anyone that I'd go as far as to say that this statement is completely false. There are far more factors than just how someone looks and even though this is the case here, you'd be completely wrong to assume it's the reason.
[editline]27th September 2014[/editline]
The reasons not to date someone are endless[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=RainbowStalin;46090690]Am I a bad person because I turned down someone [B]based solely on the fact that I don't find them physically attractive[/B][/QUOTE]
I'd read that again yourself. The guy implied that the girl's assumption of Rainbow thinking she's ugly was a valid and understandable assumption. I'm saying that even though it is the case, it's not a fair assumption to make on her part, as there are many factors that go into whether or not Rainbow dates someone.
I'm thinking I might ask out this girl in one of my classes who I started talking to last week. I don't know if I like her yet, but maybe asking her out as soon as I feel at least some sort of interest in her instead of waiting several months might turn out better for me. And I don't know if I'll see her after this semester anyway so I can't really wait.
Don't really know what to ask her to do though. I usually ask a girl for coffee, but I feel like maybe I could try something different and possibly more exciting.
[QUOTE=Banandana;46092348]I'd read that again yourself. The guy implied that the girl's assumption of Rainbow thinking she's ugly was a valid and understandable assumption. I'm saying that even though it is the case, it's not a fair assumption to make on her part, as there are many factors that go into whether or not Rainbow dates someone.[/QUOTE]
So it's not a valid assumption to make even though it's correct?
I'm confused on what your point is.
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;46093425]So it's not a valid assumption to make even though it's correct?
I'm confused on what your point is.[/QUOTE]
It's not a valid assumption to make because there are more factors that go into whether or not someone wants to date someone.
If someone says no to a date, you can't assume it's because of your appearance. It's not a reasonable assumption.
[editline]27th September 2014[/editline]
In this instance, if she assumed that is the case, it's correct, but only as a result of chance.
Coming for some advice.
Around three years ago, I, a slightly less social than average skinnyfuck became friends with the biggest QT3.14 a lot of people would die for.
We were best friends for exactly a year and I definitely helped her out of the shithole of a life she had.
Self harmed, had really shitty friends and was a peasanty thug IE- Stole from Dollar General and shit with her friends.
I liked for around a month after we'd been talking for a bit, but then decided it was best I just stayed her good friend. She quite obviously liked me tho.
Tried to kiss me once with some black lipstick on, politely shoved her away.
Shitty friends come in to play - start tearing us more and more apart doing dumb shit. Near the end of the year we knew each other, started growing more and more apart
Got really pissed one night after some bullshit, told her to piss of and never talk to me again.
Around a half a year later, really started regretting my decision. She's become a much more stable person now, also got even cuter.
Keep in mind - The first year after this happened she was still basically obsessed with me.
I'm from skinny-fuck to near Ottermode now and a pretty out there person. For the past two years I've been telling myself I'd try to talk to her again and be nice,
told her I was sorry once but not in person and that really went nowhere.
Should I try to talk to her or will I just come off as an asshole? Should I let it go and leave it the way I fucked it up?
Any input would be nice - Thanks for your time.
Edit: Ottermode - Think of an inbetween of ectomorph and mesomorph that is sculpted like a greek god. Simply put - Having a skinny build but being buff as fuck.
Double Edit: Didn't really include the main problem - I don't want to come off as sad or pathetic, probably bound to happen anyways though.
[QUOTE=s5300;46093835]Coming for some advice.
Any input would be nice - Thanks for your time.[/QUOTE]
I'd suggest try telling her you're sorry and leave it at that. Don't ask for her time or a date or meet-up or anything that would force her. Just leave it at the sorry and let her decide if she wants to talk to you :v Don't expect anything, but give it a shot and let yourself be heard.
[sp]also ottermode is great because idk what that is but otters are hella adorable and awesome[/sp]
sorry for this being offtopic
but why can I only see this thread when I sort by last post date? Why isn't it like that by default?
because garry is too lazy to fix it. gen discussion is the only one like this
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