Super Friendly Social and Love Advice V6 - JUST FUCKING ASK HER OUT

[5/3/4/3]

[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;46009902]Maybe she's more shy around you because she likes you and doesn't know you as well as her other friends?

Pretty much everyone acts differently based on who they're talking to.[/QUOTE]

so about that

Yesterday I decided to go further with this and ask for her number, and guess what? She[sp]doesn't have a phone.[/sp]Still, she wanted my number for whatever reason, so I obliged.

Here's the thing though: I ran into her by accident, and because of this, the situation became a bit awkward when some of my friends were watching. What does this have to do with what I quoted? She was shy. I was nervous as hell, however I was surprised at myself for being able to act confident and keep make a conversation despite the added pressure of my friends being there. Here's my question though, are there any signs that a girl is in to you? Some of my friends who know her say she is "fucking crazy."

Those words exactly :v:

[Rhenae]

[QUOTE=blacksam;46128479]I got rear ended when I was on my way to work today and this pretty cute looking girl gets out of the car.
We exchange information, then she tells me as I start to leave that she can't pay for it, that it was her birthday, and that she's worried about all this because she just got her car back from the shop. So I told her not to worry about it right now. I mean I didn't know what else to say. She then asked me if there was anything she could do that could convince me to not call her insurance company. I mean I could see the tears starting to form, but at the same time I couldn't tell if it was genuine. So I repeated myself. I mean, what was I supposed to say? That I don't want the back of my car fixed? Everyone who I've told this to has said, "Dude ask her out." or "it sounds like a start to a porn video." Which sounds nice and all, but I am pretty sure none of that is genuine advice. The back of my car is relatively fine, it looks like nothing more than a dent and a new coat of paint. But I don't want to get sweet talked out of getting it fixed either. If anyone was mentally shook up, it was her. So what do I do?[/QUOTE]

If she caused the accident then she deserves to pay for it. I don't mean just money or anything like that but she is a risk on the road, especially since it sounds like she just got the thing fixed from something else. Her being a cute girl who can spout a few tears has nothing to do with it.

[Guy Mannly]

Uhh

I broke up with my boyfriend this morning (for real this time) because I realized it would be healthier for me long-term.

I keep hearing him saying "I was going to buy a ring next Friday" in my head over and over and over again.

[Remedial Math]

oh man. :( you've talked about him for a LONG time. That sucks.

[Guy Mannly]

Yeah, it's rough. On the bright side, I know that my reasoning is solid enough that I'm not questioning why I did it or regretting it. My family and friends have all been very respectful about my choice so that helps a lot too.

I talked to my parents about it today and my dad's going to fly down and stay here for a few days to help me look for an apartment. It's really good to know I'm not alone in figuring out how to handle this.

[Remedial Math]

That sucks. :( You've always been nice to me and everyone else that have posted here, so you know that you can talk to us about stuff. Not sure we can HELP, but we are here.

[OscarLimaEcho]

I understand if it's a bit too private, but can I ask why or how it got to this?

[Branflakes]

I probably sound like an ass asking this, but how early is too early to ask someone out? The story is that I meet this girl a friend introduced to me, and the two of us really hit it off. I'm seeing her again tomorrow for the second time, and even though I know she has the hots for me, would it be too early to ask her? I'm trying to take this slowly and would rather she her a few more times before jumping into a relationship, as this would be the second one I've had. And well I'm afraid to have this one end up like my first, which well was one of those real shitty high school relationships.

tldr;
Would it be a bad idea to ask someone out the second time I see them, they like me and I like them, or would it be better to take it slow and meet up a few more times before jumping into a relationship.

[Remedial Math]

read the thread title

[Banandana]

[QUOTE=Branflakes;46142359]I probably sound like an ass asking this, but how early is too early to ask someone out? The story is that I meet this girl a friend introduced to me, and the two of us really hit it off. I'm seeing her again tomorrow for the second time, and even though I know she has the hots for me, would it be too early to ask her? I'm trying to take this slowly and would rather she her a few more times before jumping into a relationship, as this would be the second one I've had. And well I'm afraid to have this one end up like my first, which well was one of those real shitty high school relationships.

tldr;
Would it be a bad idea to ask someone out the second time I see them, they like me and I like them, or would it be better to take it slow and meet up a few more times before jumping into a relationship.[/QUOTE]

dude just go for it

[killerteacup]

[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;46136009]Yeah, it's rough. On the bright side, I know that my reasoning is solid enough that I'm not questioning why I did it or regretting it. My family and friends have all been very respectful about my choice so that helps a lot too.

I talked to my parents about it today and my dad's going to fly down and stay here for a few days to help me look for an apartment. It's really good to know I'm not alone in figuring out how to handle this.[/QUOTE]

I hope you find one. You guys seem like you had a good relationship for a long time but I suppose some things just have to end. Will you guys still be friends in the long run?

[Remedial Math]

statistically that's unlikely but i hope they do whatever is best for them both

[Metallics]

[QUOTE=Remedial Math;46143795]statistically that's unlikely but i hope they do whatever is best for them both[/QUOTE]

[Citation needed]

[Guy Mannly]

Thank you for your support, guys. I really appreciate it.

I'm personally doing a lot better today - I'm really looking forward to getting my own apartment and living on my own, so I've been keeping myself preoccupied with the positive stuff. I'm leaving a lot behind, but at the same time I'm excited to move forward with my life and have the chance to become independent.

My now-ex isn't doing as well. Fortunately, both of us have a lot of friends and family there to support us right now, so I think we'll both turn out okay.

[QUOTE=Oscar Lima Echo;46139663]I understand if it's a bit too private, but can I ask why or how it got to this?[/QUOTE]

I just kind of realized that I was no longer attracted to him and that my expectations for what I want out of a relationship are different now than they used to be. When I met him, I was still dealing with depression and had a very unhealthy lifestyle and didn't do much except for play video games during the day. Since then I've started working out, eating healthier, and picking up a ton of different productive hobbies (like baking, woodworking, lifting) to occupy my free time, while his life has stayed pretty much the same. He still deals with depression (refuses to get treatment for it and nothing either of us do really seems to help) and he spends most of his time sleeping or playing video games because he doesn't have any other hobbies he enjoys (when we discussed it he told me that the reason why he doesn't have any other hobbies is because of his concern about money, which I think isn't the real problem - the real problem is that he's depressed and disinterested in things that are attainable for him). He's also difficult to spend time with because he doesn't enjoy any of the same activities I do - he dislikes being outside so that rules out a lot of things I want to do while it's still warm out, and he has no interest in helping with any of my hobbies. I kind of realized I'd rather be with someone who's able to enjoy every day rather than feeling like they're just counting down days until something happens.

I also no longer find him sexually attractive because he doesn't take good care of his body - he's a bit overweight and has no interest in changing that. In general he isn't as concerned with his appearance as I am with mine.

[QUOTE=killerteacup;46143781]I hope you find one. You guys seem like you had a good relationship for a long time but I suppose some things just have to end. Will you guys still be friends in the long run?[/QUOTE]

You summed it up pretty well. We had a good run, we just ended up being different people than who we started as.

I still hold a lot of respect for him as a person and we both like the idea of staying friends since we still care about each other, but it may be difficult since this was such a big part of our lives. He had to drive me somewhere today despite the situation and we managed to hold a pretty decent conversation the whole time and it wasn't really awkward despite both of us feeling kind of crappy, so I guess we're off to a good start on the whole "eventually being friends" thing. Since we were living together, it's going to be pretty awkward for the next few days. I'm going to start looking for an apartment tomorrow and he's crashing at a friend's house for a few nights, so hopefully we can stay out of each other's hair.

[miles]

[QUOTE=Rhenae;46128032]Just because you are good friends doesn't mean you get a monopoly on their time and they can't talk to anyone else without you passive aggressively ignore them, what are you doing dude. You arn't a "back up friend" just because they have multiple friends? Friendship isn't a monogamous relationship[/QUOTE]
Finally made up with her. Thing's that I dont usually do these stuff but it just felt weird for the first time though everything's alright now.

[Taepodong-2]

[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;46128604]So now that I'm getting better at socializing I'm realizing what my issue with not being able to attract girls is. I have no fucking idea how to flirt. And I feel like because I don't know how to flirt, girls don't pick up on me being interested until I tell them and to them it just seems out of the blue because I haven't been giving any signs before.

So seriously, how does flirting work?[/QUOTE]
Anyone? I feel like this is something I really need to figure out.

[Remedial Math]

I'm also terrible at it. In a weird way I feel like I'm getting better at it, but I can't really explain how or why. For all I know I'm totally not getting better at it. So...yeah, can't really help. Sorry.

[Banandana]

[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;46144388]Anyone? I feel like this is something I really need to figure out.[/QUOTE]

I don't know much about this either, but from what I know, it seems as if it's not the cheesy pickup lines and compliments you use, but the jokes and personality you have when interacting with someone you like.

If it's someone who would consider going on a date or something, they're not going to drop your jokes and leave you laughing on your own. Again, just from what experience I have. Not much to go off of but it seems like the way to find someone who isn't fake.

[Remedial Math]

the hard part is figuring out if they're doing it just to be polite or if they want to bone

[Taepodong-2]

[QUOTE=Remedial Math;46144779]the hard part is figuring out if they're doing it just to be polite or if they want to bone[/QUOTE]

This is also something I have a major problem with. I can never figure out if a girl is actually into me or if she's just being friendly. Usually she's just being friendly

[5/3/4/3]

[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;46145039]This is also something I have a major problem with. I can never figure out if a girl is actually into me or if she's just being friendly. Usually she's just being friendly[/QUOTE]

Same with me. There is one girl that acts flirty occasionally with me, another one who is super extroverted and hyper/playful with me, and another one who is extroverted and playful/hyper around her friends, but quiet and shy as fuck around me.

why

[Banandana]

I know this one girl, really nice, and anytime you talk to her, she stands really really close.

I thought maybe I was the only one who she did it to, and maybe she liked me or something. I asked a mutual friend and she told me the girl does that to everyone. It's good to ask a mutual friend before thinking of things in that way. It's kind of a mindfuck if you jump the gun and think of it out of perportion.

I know a guy who misinterpreted what someone said and instantly started rambling about sex. Just don't do that kind of shit, don't jump the gun.

[editline]3rd October 2014[/editline]

[b]ask[/b]

[5/3/4/3]

[QUOTE=Banandana;46146008]I know this one girl, really nice, and anytime you talk to her, she stands really really close.

I thought maybe I was the only one who she did it to, and maybe she liked me or something. I asked a mutual friend and she told me the girl does that to everyone. It's good to ask a mutual friend before thinking of things in that way. It's kind of a mindfuck if you jump the gun and think of it out of perportion.

I know a guy who misinterpreted what someone said and instantly started rambling about sex. Just don't do that kind of shit, don't jump the gun.

[editline]3rd October 2014[/editline]

[B]ask[/B][/QUOTE]

that's probably what I'm gonna do.

I actually ran into the girl I'm crushing on the other day by accident, which is the third girl I described in my post.

This random encounter somehow turned in to me asking for her number, and in the background I could hear her friends cheering her on or some other bullshit. I could start telling that she got nervous, and when I tried to respark the conversation, she looked to be at a loss of words, which I thought was funny. I had to get to class, so I cut it short.

I'm also overthinking, so I'm gonna cut this post short

[Remedial Math]

WHAT COULD YOU POSSIBLY BE OVERTHINKING

HOW...HOW COULD THIS BE LITERALLY ANYTHING BUT THE FACT THAT SHE WANTS YOUR NUMBER

SHE WANTS TO PUT YOUR BONE INSIDE OF HER, STOP OVERTHINKNG

[I Am Dumb]

Okay guys, I would really appreciate any advice you could give on this. About four months ago a girl was hired by my best friend who is also my boss at where I work.

This girl really liked me for a little while, she would laugh really hard at my stupid jokes, spend all of her free time talking to me and told my friends she would "let me hit it."

I ignored her infatuation because I am just not attracted to girls that throw it at me and did not know who she really was at this point, although I always thought she was incredibly beautiful.

A few weeks later she starts to develop a thing for my best friend and boss which I thought was great for a little while. She would ask me about him (why he's upset, does he like her, would it make him happy if I did this, and so on.)

A few months pass while my friend gives her no sign of shared feelings and tells me he just wants to be friends with her, and it's during this that I really started to like this girl. I knew at this time I had sort of screwed myself but despite that I can't really seem to shake the way I feel.

Recently and unfortunately I ended up telling her how I feel and asking her to go on a date (I know I'm an idiot.) She basically told me "I really like you, I love hanging out with you... in a platonic way" she also stated that she put me in the "friend zone" after she started to like my friend.

She didn't reply to my apologetic text and I tried to call her soon after to clear things up and she ignored it. She used to talk to me all the time about anything and now she pretty much avoids conversations with me whenever possible. I realize at this point I just needed to back off and give it time, although I still don't really understand why she was so upset about it.

At this point I feel like I'm in a downward spiral, I feel like I'm only becoming more interested in her and she's becoming less interested in me... even as friends.

I guess what I'm looking for an answer to is, this girl is pretty much the only interest I have right now and I like her more than I've ever liked another, is it worth jumping through the hoops to see it out and continue to try persuading her to give me a shot or am I just screwing myself even further?

[Metallics]

[QUOTE=I Am Dumb;46146455]Okay guys, I would really appreciate any advice you could give on this. About four months ago a girl was hired by my best friend who is also my boss at where I work.

This girl really liked me for a little while, she would laugh really hard at my stupid jokes, spend all of her free time talking to me and told my friends she would "let me hit it."

I ignored her infatuation because I am just not attracted to girls that throw it at me and did not know who she really was at this point, although I always thought she was incredibly beautiful.

A few weeks later she starts to develop a thing for my best friend and boss which I thought was great for a little while. She would ask me about him (why he's upset, does he like her, would it make him happy if I did this, and so on.)

A few months pass while my friend gives her no sign of shared feelings and tells me he just wants to be friends with her, and it's during this that I really started to like this girl. I knew at this time I had sort of screwed myself but despite that I can't really seem to shake the way I feel.

Recently and unfortunately I ended up telling her how I feel and asking her to go on a date (I know I'm an idiot.) She basically told me "I really like you, I love hanging out with you... in a platonic way" she also stated that she put me in the "friend zone" after she started to like my friend.

She didn't reply to my apologetic text and I tried to call her soon after to clear things up and she ignored it. She used to talk to me all the time about anything and now she pretty much avoids conversations with me whenever possible. I realize at this point I just needed to back off and give it time, although I still don't really understand why she was so upset about it.

At this point I feel like I'm in a downward spiral, I feel like I'm only becoming more interested in her and she's becoming less interested in me... even as friends.

I guess what I'm looking for an answer to is, this girl is pretty much the only interest I have right now and I like her more than I've ever liked another, is it worth jumping through the hoops to see it out and continue to try persuading her to give me a shot or am I just screwing myself even further?[/QUOTE]

Drop that shit and move on. If your friend has any sense he will also do the same.

[I Am Dumb]

[QUOTE=metallics;46146657]Drop that shit and move on. If your friend has any sense he will also do the same.[/QUOTE]
I know that this is probably going to be the most common advice and to some extent I agree, but I just really don't have an option to move on. I really don't have much of a social life, I'm 24 years old and to top it all off there's just something about this girl I really admire despite some of her immature remarks.

[Metallics]

[QUOTE=I Am Dumb;46146696]I know that this is probably going to be the most common advice and to some extent I agree, but I just really don't have an option to move on. I really don't have much of a social life, I'm 24 years old and to top it all off there's just something about this girl I really admire despite some of her immature remarks.[/QUOTE]

The option to move on is the only you ever always have. You can try and make excuses, but you are perfectly capable of it.

[Banandana]

Even though occasionally I post here, I'm still fascinated by the fact that I learn so much from what others say.

[426_Hemi]

[QUOTE=I Am Dumb;46146455]Okay guys, I would really appreciate any advice you could give on this. About four months ago a girl was hired by my best friend who is also my boss at where I work.

This girl really liked me for a little while, she would laugh really hard at my stupid jokes, spend all of her free time talking to me and told my friends she would "let me hit it."

I ignored her infatuation because I am just not attracted to girls that throw it at me and did not know who she really was at this point, although I always thought she was incredibly beautiful.

A few weeks later she starts to develop a thing for my best friend and boss which I thought was great for a little while. She would ask me about him (why he's upset, does he like her, would it make him happy if I did this, and so on.)

A few months pass while my friend gives her no sign of shared feelings and tells me he just wants to be friends with her, and it's during this that I really started to like this girl. I knew at this time I had sort of screwed myself but despite that I can't really seem to shake the way I feel.

Recently and unfortunately I ended up telling her how I feel and asking her to go on a date (I know I'm an idiot.) She basically told me "I really like you, I love hanging out with you... in a platonic way" she also stated that she put me in the "friend zone" after she started to like my friend.

She didn't reply to my apologetic text and I tried to call her soon after to clear things up and she ignored it. She used to talk to me all the time about anything and now she pretty much avoids conversations with me whenever possible. I realize at this point I just needed to back off and give it time, although I still don't really understand why she was so upset about it.

At this point I feel like I'm in a downward spiral, I feel like I'm only becoming more interested in her and she's becoming less interested in me... even as friends.

I guess what I'm looking for an answer to is, this girl is pretty much the only interest I have right now and I like her more than I've ever liked another, is it worth jumping through the hoops to see it out and continue to try persuading her to give me a shot or am I just screwing myself even further?[/QUOTE]

Don't have any regrets. First she's interested in you, and you chose to wait a bit ( which imo is the right thing to do ) . Then she prefer your boss, and she stays friend with you. You finally show that you're also interested in her, an now she don't want to talk to you anymore ? Respect her choice, let her alone changing her friends/crush every month and don't feel ashamed or anything by this. If she really have something for you she'll come back, if she don't, consider yourself happy for not having to deal with a shaky, unstable relationship .

Life continue mate, there are about 3.500.000.000 other women left in the world, it's just a matter of time before you meet the right one :dance: