• Super Friendly Social and Love Advice V6 - JUST FUCKING ASK HER OUT
    11,088 replies, posted
fuck this shit.
yeah, you can't be in a healthy relationship with her when you still have those feelings for her. she's clearly over you, so it's just going to damage you. If I were you, I'd just politely distance myself. like sebi said, there's loads of other people out there that could make you happy. the "I can't just go and fuck anyone like you can" was in bad taste, though. but it was pretty strange of her to keep mentioning they hadn't done it yet.
[QUOTE=loopoo;46383196]yeah, you can't be in a healthy relationship with her when you still have those feelings for her. she's clearly over you, so it's just going to damage you. If I were you, I'd just politely distance myself. like sebi said, there's loads of other people out there that could make you happy. the "I can't just go and fuck anyone like you can" was in bad taste, though. but it was pretty strange of her to keep mentioning they hadn't done it yet.[/QUOTE] I don't know how to make my mind believe that she's over me. No matter how clear you think it might be for you, for me it's not clear one bit at all. and I know there's other people, and when I spend time with other people and don't think about her I'm fine. I'd actually say I'm happy. problem for me is I don't know how to meet people. I don't know if I just suck at making friends or what, but I haven't really had any real life friends the last 3-4 years. I've recently started going to uh, I don't really know what to call it, but it's school, and I'm taking a course or something to become an electrician, and I think people like me, but I don't really know how to get to hang out with anyone or what to do. sometimes I just want to go out in the city, but then I remember I'm living off of 170 euro a month and atleast 120 of that goes into fuel. and yeah, I know the last two things I said were dumb and simply should've not been said. I guess my biggest problem is lack of friends, and I feel like I can't afford to go out or anything like that so I don't really know what to do.
[QUOTE=Psygo;46383263]I don't know how to make my mind believe that she's over me. No matter how clear you think it might be for you, for me it's not clear one bit at all. and I know there's other people, and when I spend time with other people and don't think about her I'm fine. I'd actually say I'm happy. problem for me is I don't know how to meet people. I don't know if I just suck at making friends or what, but I haven't really had any real life friends the last 3-4 years. I've recently started going to uh, I don't really know what to call it, but it's school, and I'm taking a course or something to become an electrician, and I think people like me, but I don't really know how to get to hang out with anyone or what to do. sometimes I just want to go out in the city, but then I remember I'm living off of 170 euro a month and atleast 120 of that goes into fuel. and yeah, I know the last two things I said were dumb and simply should've not been said. I guess my biggest problem is lack of friends, and I feel like I can't afford to go out or anything like that so I don't really know what to do.[/QUOTE] Stop investing so much time and energy on what could be one of the biggest reasons you don't have a lot of real life friends. Glorifying someone that lives this far away will just screw with your social life because it makes you pay even less attention to the people around you. If you're going to be an electrician, you'll have to start trying to socialize and integrate. If Denmark works any way like Norway, apprentices are selected by how they get along with the rest of the company, not how good you are with wiring.
yeah, you're right.
there are 300 people in my house right now, i've had to tell six couples to stop knocking on my door because i'm not going to let them come in and bone on my bed, two of my roommates are (i'm pretty sure) in their rooms boning random girls, and the other one is fucking nowhere to be found I hate being the antisocial nerd that this makes me seem, but I just hate parties like this and I much prefer to just chill in my room and watch TV while everyone else's room gets trashed/stuff stolen. So annoying.
Just dropped off my new boyfriend (omg) at the airport. He's planning to visit every month so I'm not too bothered, hell of a lot better than when Andrey and I had been long distance. Still trying to wrap my head around why someone who looks like that would waste their money on plane tickets once a month to go after someone who lives a thousand miles away. Couldn't get a good pic of us together because his phone sucks and we didn't have a mirror or another person so here's a [url=http://i.imgur.com/Xl6yb2J.jpg]picture of him[/url] (and a [url=http://i.imgur.com/W3Bd32M.png?2]shitty skype screenshot[/url] to counterbalance pre-flight grumpy face) and here's a [url=http://i.imgur.com/Lb9ZeQE.jpg]picture of me[/url] in the dress I wore to the opera we went to (sorry to camwhore but my arms are looking too good not to). Also I think one of the best outcomes of this visit is that I no longer have any problem singing in my apartment at this point, because if my neighbors can hear that then they also definitely heard the >30 minute screaming sessions that regularly took place the last few days. And my bedroom is on the side of my all male college-age neighbors. Hope they're okay with me belting out Iggy Azalea in the middle of the night in the future. Kind of funny to me how this was the situation I was in the first time I ever posted in Super Friendly/SGFSAS. It was either right before Andrey and I had met in real life for the first time or right after he had gone home. So... to commemorate this "anniversary" of sorts, now that I've actually met him in real life and am less likely to get a "you're making a huge mistake" lecture, I have a secret I have to share with you guys. Cap is 30. I am 20. We originally were just planning on sex but now we actually like each other for more than that (and the sex is waaay too good to throw that away). The more that I talk to him, the more I realize he has all of the qualities I'm looking for in a future partner, while lacking the ones that dragged down my previous relationship. We talked extensively about what we were looking for before even meeting in person and it seemed like a really good idea in theory - now after meeting I can say that we work well together in practice too. It's also a little bit less weird when you consider that we're both at pretty similar points in life despite the age gap - we're both at the same point education-wise (he just started college two years ago) and have similar living situations/lifestyles (both of us are pretty health-conscious. I say this as I shove a piece of pumpkin pie into my mouth.). But basically I did some thinking about what went wrong in my last relationship and kind of realized that I'm already able to make myself happy. I don't need a romantic relationship - hell, I don't even need friends - to be happy. I was in a relationship with someone who took that away from me because I was too busy constantly worrying about his emotional state. I need someone who's emotionally stable and is capable of handling their own problems and is driven to constantly improve upon themselves, and I think that's what Cap is looking for too... and I think we both found that. No fucking clue how I'm going to explain this one to my parents. Slipped up today by paying for a parking ticket at the airport with my credit card. Been keeping it a secret but I'm not sure how long that will last. A few of my friends know and they have pretty mixed opinions on it - interestingly, my gay friends are the only ones who don't seem to see a problem with it. [editline]2nd November 2014[/editline] Also it's fucking difficult to find stuff to do when you're under 21. I feel like Knives Chau when she's dating Scott.
[QUOTE=Remedial Math;46390004]there are 300 people in my house right now, i've had to tell six couples to stop knocking on my door because i'm not going to let them come in and bone on my bed, two of my roommates are (i'm pretty sure) in their rooms boning random girls, and the other one is fucking nowhere to be found I hate being the antisocial nerd that this makes me seem, but I just hate parties like this and I much prefer to just chill in my room and watch TV while everyone else's room gets trashed/stuff stolen. So annoying.[/QUOTE] Can you not lock your door and go out and try to enjoy some of the party? I can assure you not everyone there is some obnoxious party-animal. There's always a few decent people. You just have to find them and chat. You've pretty much got the perfect opportunity to test out whether or not you'd like a party. You could have a few drinks, see if you're enjoying yourself, and if you're not, you could just seclude yourself in your room if you wanted. Things like this are what you'll look back on and think "Fuck, I wish I left my comfort zone a little back then".
[QUOTE=loopoo;46390538]Can you not lock your door and go out and try to enjoy some of the party? I can assure you not everyone there is some obnoxious party-animal. There's always a few decent people. You just have to find them and chat. You've pretty much got the perfect opportunity to test out whether or not you'd like a party. You could have a few drinks, see if you're enjoying yourself, and if you're not, you could just seclude yourself in your room if you wanted. Things like this are what you'll look back on and think "Fuck, I wish I left my comfort zone a little back then".[/QUOTE] Yeah, it's not like huge parties like that are a common occurrence. Just chilling in your room is something you can do whenever you want.
[QUOTE=loopoo;46390538]Can you not lock your door and go out and try to enjoy some of the party? I can assure you not everyone there is some obnoxious party-animal. There's always a few decent people. You just have to find them and chat. You've pretty much got the perfect opportunity to test out whether or not you'd like a party. You could have a few drinks, see if you're enjoying yourself, and if you're not, you could just seclude yourself in your room if you wanted. Things like this are what you'll look back on and think "Fuck, I wish I left my comfort zone a little back then".[/QUOTE] Yeah, I did end up doing that. I've been to parties like this before so I know I'm not a huge fan, but technically being the "host" gives me a weird surge of confidence, like I actually have a reason to take charge and see how everyone's doing and feeling. If I act like this at parties that aren't mine, I'd probably enjoy parties more. Learned a good lesson, I suppose. [editline]2nd November 2014[/editline] [QUOTE=_Axel;46390678]Yeah, it's not like huge parties like that are a common occurrence. Just chilling in your room is something you can do whenever you want.[/QUOTE] I live with three people. Two of them are on our volleyball team, one's on our crew team, and each of them belong to their own frat. The volleyball team and the crew team routinely throw the biggest parties on campus, and two of the three frats are huge partying frats. They invited fucking everyone. It will be a common occurence
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;46390368]Just dropped off my new boyfriend (omg) at the airport. He's planning to visit every month so I'm not too bothered, hell of a lot better than when Andrey and I had been long distance. Still trying to wrap my head around why someone who looks like that would waste their money on plane tickets once a month to go after someone who lives a thousand miles away. Couldn't get a good pic of us together because his phone sucks and we didn't have a mirror or another person so here's a [url=http://i.imgur.com/Xl6yb2J.jpg]picture of him[/url] (and a [url=http://i.imgur.com/W3Bd32M.png?2]shitty skype screenshot[/url] to counterbalance pre-flight grumpy face) and here's a [url=http://i.imgur.com/Lb9ZeQE.jpg]picture of me[/url] in the dress I wore to the opera we went to (sorry to camwhore but my arms are looking too good not to). Also I think one of the best outcomes of this visit is that I no longer have any problem singing in my apartment at this point, because if my neighbors can hear that then they also definitely heard the >30 minute screaming sessions that regularly took place the last few days. And my bedroom is on the side of my all male college-age neighbors. Hope they're okay with me belting out Iggy Azalea in the middle of the night in the future. Kind of funny to me how this was the situation I was in the first time I ever posted in Super Friendly/SGFSAS. It was either right before Andrey and I had met in real life for the first time or right after he had gone home. So... to commemorate this "anniversary" of sorts, now that I've actually met him in real life and am less likely to get a "you're making a huge mistake" lecture, I have a secret I have to share with you guys. Cap is 30. I am 20. We originally were just planning on sex but now we actually like each other for more than that (and the sex is waaay too good to throw that away). The more that I talk to him, the more I realize he has all of the qualities I'm looking for in a future partner, while lacking the ones that dragged down my previous relationship. We talked extensively about what we were looking for before even meeting in person and it seemed like a really good idea in theory - now after meeting I can say that we work well together in practice too. It's also a little bit less weird when you consider that we're both at pretty similar points in life despite the age gap - we're both at the same point education-wise (he just started college two years ago) and have similar living situations/lifestyles (both of us are pretty health-conscious. I say this as I shove a piece of pumpkin pie into my mouth.). But basically I did some thinking about what went wrong in my last relationship and kind of realized that I'm already able to make myself happy. I don't need a romantic relationship - hell, I don't even need friends - to be happy. I was in a relationship with someone who took that away from me because I was too busy constantly worrying about his emotional state. I need someone who's emotionally stable and is capable of handling their own problems and is driven to constantly improve upon themselves, and I think that's what Cap is looking for too... and I think we both found that. No fucking clue how I'm going to explain this one to my parents. Slipped up today by paying for a parking ticket at the airport with my credit card. Been keeping it a secret but I'm not sure how long that will last. A few of my friends know and they have pretty mixed opinions on it - interestingly, my gay friends are the only ones who don't seem to see a problem with it. [editline]2nd November 2014[/editline] Also it's fucking difficult to find stuff to do when you're under 21. I feel like Knives Chau when she's dating Scott.[/QUOTE] Why is he Captain America?
[QUOTE=RocketRacer;46394612]Why is he Captain America?[/QUOTE] Because I think he looks like Chris Evans's Captain America (and has a very similar smile), his name is Stephen (like Steve, like Steve Rogers), and he's fucking ripped.
Just back from a pub quiz, my kind of night. Loved every minute of it.
I've been thinking about one of those. I'd fucking destroy it. How'd you find a team?
Just met someone a couple of days ago on Tinder. For the little time I've talked to her, she seems like an amazing person. She's funny, intelligent, and jaw-droppingly gorgeous. I've taken a huge interest in her, and I feel like she's interested in me as well. The only problem is I'm terrified of fucking this up with my depression. I'm determined to finally work through it because I want an honest relationship, and she doesn't deserve to be with a person who's shitty and depressed all the time. The first place that I need to get sorted is school. I've got papers that have been due for months that I've kept slacking behind on, but I'm not even sure I'll be able to get them in anymore. I can't even get focused enough to work on them, but fuck if I'm not going to do it now. Also, I found blood in my stool earlier, and I'm shitting myself (unintentional pun).
If you realize your depression is going to be a problem, you should start working on finding steps to improve it. If you're in college, many schools offer counseling to students (I've just recently started seeing a counselor myself for dealing with PTSD). On top of that, taking care of your physical health will likely help with your emotional health. It's good that you've found something to motivate you to start working on it. Depression can be hard to get out of because it saps your motivation to improve, but maintaining a healthier routine gets easier over time.
If you find blood, it could be a hemorrhoid and/or you're not getting enough fiber.
could also be anxiety when i was struggling with really deep depression and anxiety i only shit like three times a week so i basically tore my butthole every time i pooped that's not a pleasant mental image, i know, but it does happen
If you weren't shitting bricks I'd be worried.
[QUOTE=Remedial Math;46395611]I've been thinking about one of those. I'd fucking destroy it. How'd you find a team?[/QUOTE] Coursemates. The pub was graced by teams such as: "Team I Left My Child in Portugal" "Team Is It a Bird, Is It a Plane, No, It's the Virgin Galactic Spaceplane" "Team What Do You Call a Prostitute With a Runny Nose? Full" and finally "Team What's The Most Important Part of an ISIS Joke? The Execution" [editline]3rd November 2014[/editline] We came 2nd! And then proceeded to claim the game was fixed
[QUOTE=loopoo;46398083]Coursemates. The pub was graced by teams such as: "Team I Left My Child in Portugal" "Team Is It a Bird, Is It a Plane, No, It's the Virgin Galactic Spaceplane" "Team What Do You Call a Prostitute With a Runny Nose? Full" and finally "Team What's The Most Important Part of an ISIS Joke? The Execution" [editline]3rd November 2014[/editline] We came 2nd! And then proceeded to claim the game was fixed[/QUOTE] Those are the worst jokes, also the best.
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;46397119]If you realize your depression is going to be a problem, you should start working on finding steps to improve it. If you're in college, many schools offer counseling to students (I've just recently started seeing a counselor myself for dealing with PTSD). On top of that, taking care of your physical health will likely help with your emotional health. It's good that you've found something to motivate you to start working on it. Depression can be hard to get out of because it saps your motivation to improve, but maintaining a healthier routine gets easier over time.[/QUOTE] I know, I've got some ideas of what I should do. First and foremost, like I said, is to work on school. Then I'll get into social interaction. I'm hesitant about counseling now, since I was sent to the hospital for suicidal ideations. I didn't do anything, I just had thoughts about suicide. I had no intention to act on those thoughts, but I was sent anyway, and it fucked up my spring semester. Failed every class, lost school scholarship, and had to pay $7000 out of my own pocket to pay for loans and stuff from that semester. It literally fucking killed me. That week in rehabilitation did help for a bit, but in the long run it fucked me and my family over really badly. And, I'm definitely going to start working on my physical health even more now. I'm not sure what workouts I should be looking at. We have a gym on campus, but it's constantly occupied by people, and it's really intimidating. I'm probably going to work out in my room with my pull up bar. I had a program where I did pull ups, push ups, and squats, so I'll probably stick with that for a while. Then, I also have skateboarding, so that'll be my primary source of cardio. [QUOTE=Remedial Math;46397661]could also be anxiety when i was struggling with really deep depression and anxiety i only shit like three times a week so i basically tore my butthole every time i pooped that's not a pleasant mental image, i know, but it does happen[/QUOTE] That might be it. I'm lucky to go once or twice a week, so there's definitely something wrong with my diet. But, I should probably be on the safe side and talk to a doctor or something. It also might be hemorrhoids, since I've had similar symptoms to it for quite a while. [editline]November 3, 2014[/editline] Maybe it's not my diet. I have oatmeal 3 or 4 times a week, so I'm assuming I'm getting the fiber I need. I've got no fucking clue what's wrong. My diet is "fine" otherwise.
See a doctor, you might have butt cancer. But really though, if you have no idea and it doesn't seem to be hurt or cut when it comes out, I'd go see someone ASAP. [editline]3rd November 2014[/editline] Who knows what could be wrong.
Blood in your stool isn't a big deal provided A) its bright red, this is fresh blood not from higher up in the digestive tract B) it doesn't keep happening If t sticks around too long though you should go see a doc, infections can be a pretty big issue in that area Edit: I wanted to congratulate Guy on landing an awesome new bf (he really does look like Cap, i'm kinda jelly), but i really don't feel these two conversations mix well at all :v:
Speaking of shit, Guy's new boyfriend...
[QUOTE=Rhenae;46399842]Blood in your stool isn't a big deal provided A) its bright red, this is fresh blood not from higher up in the digestive tract B) it doesn't keep happening If t sticks around too long though you should go see a doc, infections can be a pretty big issue in that area [/QUOTE] Thanks for clearing my mind a bit. It's happened once before, but not as... gory. Not gonna go into details, but it was pretty bad. Hopefully it's nothing bad like butt cancer, but I may get it checked out anyway since I've been having intestinal and stomach problems. Anyway, relationships! Those are a thing. Hopefully something happens between this girl and I. I want to work on my depression so that I can be happy with her and make her happy, that is if anything happens. I was also thinking that if we do end up together, I might move back home next year so I could be closer to her, and because I'm running out of money to pay for housing at college. The problem is I hate living with my parents. Every time I'm back home, I start feeling shitty. It's like I have homesickness when I'm home. I'm also afraid that I scared her off with revealing my problems. I didn't tell her that I was depressed, just that I've got low confidence and self esteem issues, and that I'm working them, but I still feel like I kind of messed up. I just feel awkward about the entire situation now. I wanted to keep this away from her, and here I am spilling my guts. I don't want to put my problems onto her. I'm also probably thinking too far ahead with this girl. Hell, I've only been talking to her for 2 days and I'm acting like we're gonna be together forever. I guess I've been craving an emotional connection so much, that now that I have someone that has a slight interest in me, I'm going crazy.
[QUOTE=Emugod;46399200]I'm lucky to go once or twice a week[/QUOTE] uh go see a doctor like asap
[QUOTE=Remedial Math;46400743]uh go see a doctor like asap[/QUOTE] Some people only go crap every 2-3 days which is perfectly healthy. Most people also don't keep a detailed log of how often they drop one, so estimating a bit low isn't too surprising. To make this uncomfortably personal, I would probably exaggerate that I only take a dump once or twice a week either, as that is what is feels like mentally, but more accurately its about every 2-3 days depending on diet. If he is concerned he could keep track for a week or whatever and see how often it actually is. Super Friendly Social and Love Advice; Shittalking edition
Well my mom just called me telling me that my step dad is in the hospital on life support. There's nothing they can do for him and he's going to die. My mom started telling me everything that was wrong but I told her to stop because talking about failing organs and shit freaks me right the fuck out. We already knew there was something wrong with him for like six months, he was diagnosed with liver failure, but I guess his body just decided it had enough. And what's really sad is that less than a month ago all his tests came back saying he was really healthy, considering he has a non-functioning liver. So just when my life was actually feeling like it was kind of getting on track, something terrible just had to happen and beat me down again. This is the second family member in like five or six years to die way before their time. First my grandma who wasn't even 60 yet died of cancer, now my step dad who's not even 50 is dieing from liver failure, kidney failure, a lung infection and who knows what else because this is about where I told my mom to stop.
I find it weird to think that people are going to die "before their time". Well, apparently not. People die when it's time, not when you think it's time. Anyway, I'm sorry for your step dad. Try not to let it beat you down. I know that it's hard to bear such grief, and coming from someone that hasn't lived through the pain makes it as if I should not even mention the argument. You can start by not thinking that he died before his time. That is something living people think about that only causes more grief. There is no right time to die. It just comes. And thinking "Oh, if he hadn't drunk" or "Oh, if only he had a healthy lifestyle" etc. is not going to help. He's dead no matter what; only the living suffer from death. Therefore start by accepting the fact, or try to. It should all go downhill from there.
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