• Super Friendly Social and Love Advice V6 - JUST FUCKING ASK HER OUT
    11,088 replies, posted
Now, I don't mean to be all dramatic, but that ended before it even began this time. I don't think I'm cut out for the whole relationship thing, and life's too short to keep fucking up constantly. I'm just not going to bother from now on. [editline]aasdf[/editline] And no more fucking kissing, that's just begging for trouble in my newfound experience.
Don't deny yourself from something beautiful because of a bad experience. It will come naturally over time once you meet a nice girl, you just need to take the right opportunity. Kissing is not the issue at all. Like I mentioned, once you have a nice girl it all comes naturally and feels very good. Life has tons of fuckups and I had my fair share of bad experiences. You learn from it after all.
It's a bit strange occurrence to me. I started talking with this girl. And got to know that her bf was out of station. Even then we continued talking. And it's been nearly one month. Tomorrow her boyfriend will come back. I know that she likes me too. She admitted that she liked me too as normally she would start ignoring someone who likes her. But the time is not right. I guess the time will tell. Life is a mixed bag of surprises !
One of my best friends is not talking as much to me like she used to last year. She is going through a lot for reasons I don't know, probably stress. I really want to cheer her up and be there but whenever I get the chance face to face she doesn't answer back or she's too busy at school. She does talk to my other friends but not me as much. I even text her saying I hope you're going to get better. She thanks me but when we're at school, she doesn't acknowledge me like I'm sort of a ghost yet she talks to my friends. This sounds asshole-y I admit but I only want to be there for her. I text her later "why can't you acknowledge me whenever we're at school" but she responds back saying "What about you is there to acknowledge." I replied "I just want a simple hi dude." "I would but I don't like talking." She always loved to talk. We stopped texting for a week until she got a little better. Now I'm going to give her some space. I'm not sure if I'm the problem or it's just some unfortunate circumstances, I only want an answer.
[QUOTE=doomevil;46500410]She thanks me but when we're at school, she doesn't acknowledge me like I'm sort of a ghost yet she talks to my friends. This sounds asshole-y I admit but I only want to be there for her.[/QUOTE] You're not doing a very good job of conveying that if you're antagonizing her for how she's acting. If you know she's dealing with some problems right now, offer your support - don't complain and make it about you.
if you can tell that something's off, i don't think saying "hey what the fuck is wrong with you, just say hi" is the best option
I texted her saying how my immature comment was very selfish and uncalled for. I apologized and she thanked for that and I asked her to call me out if I'm acting that way again. Thank you guys, I admit I complained for something that wasn't in my control.
holy shit someone took our advice what's happening
fuck you i take my own advice it usually works out very well
i don't even take my own advice
It's amazing that when I look back over the past few weeks, things are so different to what I thought they would be. I thought I was going to be miserable for weeks, with basically very small hopes for anything getting better. But since my ex split up with me, after that first week, things have really been quite great. That first week I was miserable, and I was upset constantly. That weekend I had to play a gig with my band, and after we played I went out with my bandmates and got drunk. It helped massively, and I had an awesome time. I've been working away as normal, getting on with life. The day after my ex split up with me, I had a job interview that I only managed to get thanks to my brother. I went and thought it went okay, minus the fact that I was missing my smart clothes. Turns out that I accidentally put my suit into a bag with all my ex's stuff. She mentioned it a while ago but I still have to get it back. At home I've been playing a lot more guitar and bass than I normally would have, putting a lot into my music. More video games as well, and I've been visiting my brother's house and hanging with him a fair bit more as well. My car broke, and I've been waiting about 2 weeks to get it back but it's at least been repaired. Hopefully it's not too expensive once I go and pick it up. I've been chatting to some of the girls from work as well, since I actually can now as my ex always got jealous when I spoke to other women. Not sure why, maybe it's an insecurity thing. I went out on Friday night to celebrate the fact that I did get that job. I went out with my bandmates, a couple of the girls from work and one of them brought their boyfriend. We all knew each other and it was a great night. I got pretty wrecked, and everyone seemed to enjoy themselves. A couple of people never made it which was a bit disappointing but they had their reasons and it's fair enough. My new job is going to be great. A lot of driving but I'm fine with that as I get to listen to my own music and whatnot. Good pay too, about £300 a week, paid every Friday. It's probably about 1/3 more than what I get now. The only downside is that I'm going to be working on my own most of the day, so there's no real social aspect with co-workers, other than a couple of hours when I go in every morning. Working in a supermarket, there's always social stuff going on, and a chance to chat to people. I guess that's a price I'll have to pay, but the girls I went out with on Friday said that they'll definitely invite me out again, which is nice. I've never had anyone say that they'd invite me on a night out so it's pretty good to have that happen. I still get a bit lonely every now and again, and I do really miss having company a lot of the time, but that's just something I'll have to get used to properly. I've not been an asshole to my ex at all and a lot of people seem pretty amazed by that. I've not called her names, told lies or anything like that. If people have asked me what's wrong then I've just told them the truth about what happened. Some people have said they're amazed that I've been so nice considering how I was treated. I guess they're right. The singer in my band said that it says a lot about my morals and who I am as a person. There's basically been zero contact between us since she left. A couple of texts, and that's it. I saw her mother the other day and she's perfectly fine with me. She said that she could have been knocked over with a feather when she found out what had happened. I said that the same went for me. Things were maybe a little awkward, but that's not really surprising. My ex has been more bitter about what's happened than I have, and considering that it was her decision to end it, I don't really understand. What I have realised though, in the past couple of weeks is that she isn't the person that I fell in love with any more. I fell in love with the shy, quiet person she used to be. She always had her guard up and let few people close to her. She isn't that way any more. She's far more confident in everything that she does, and in herself. The way she is now, I think it's a lot to do with me. But I don't know if she realises that, or if she just doesn't want to admit it to herself. Since that first week though, everything has really been on the up for me. Things couldn't really be that much better than what they are now. Surprising how life can change at the drop of a hat.
What's your new job? Congrats, it's awesome to see things looking good for you man. All the best with your new job!
Update: Since I've acknowledge my isolation problem life has been going good so far. I've been doing therapy at a psychologist and it has been doing wonders. Helps me understand and stuff. Well, the good thing is, I'm actually rebuilding my life again. It's still baby steps but I feel I'm dedicating way more to studying, staying till late at uni reviewing the subjects. And it's paying off. My grades aren't that great yet but they're becoming a lot better than they used to. I still stress sometimes about if I'm really going to be able to do all the subjects this semester after 5 years in a "coma" of sorts. Sometimes it's a real effort to force myself to study but I'm managing it. My psychologist tells me to relax and do things step by step since it's not expected that after 5 years of total depression and isolation I'll manage to get great grades at the beginning. It's kinda like when we're sick and lose weight. Now I have to exercise again to become healthy and get where I want. However, socially I'm still kind of a mess. I still have the same closed small groups of friends which is good in a way because it means I still have people standing by me, but on the other hand I'm not meeting anyone new and I kinda miss that. I'm lacking that. Sometimes I find myself fantasizing about getting a girlfriend which is stupid. Othertimes I still feel completely alone, even if in a crowded room. It's like an overwelming feeling of loneliness. It's like... No matter who I'm with or where I'm at I'm alone and I feel I don't fit or belong. Which is weird because I know I'm doing what I like, but on the other hand I'm not doing it surrounded by the people I like. So yeah, it's pretty much this.
i broke down barriers today gentlemen she's a die hard red sox fan im a die hard yankee's fan she wants to go on a date [editline]17th November 2014[/editline] i think the thing we both can agree on though is that its a good thing neither of us are phillies fans
[QUOTE=loopoo;46506047]What's your new job? Congrats, it's awesome to see things looking good for you man. All the best with your new job![/QUOTE] Royal Mail. When I say a lot of driving, I mean a LOT of driving as well. It's 20 miles from my house to the central office here. Then I have to take a van about 15 miles out to get to my delivery. Then the delivery involves about 70 miles a day according to my brother. Then another 15 back to town and then the last 20 home again. Easily 140 miles a day. But that's fine, I genuinely don't mind having to drive that much. Not right now anyway but that may be subject to change. The main problem with starting now is that I'm starting just before Christmas when everything is at its busiest, but it can only get easier after this. Thankfully my ex isn't on my delivery route, cause that may be a bit awkward...
time for podcasts yo
[QUOTE=Handsome Matt;46515122]Been spending a load of time with my ex-girlfriends best friend.. Think I like her, this is not going to play out very well.[/QUOTE] [IMG]http://i.imgur.com/flFgB.gif[/IMG]
my advice is go for it be sure to ask for a threesome after the first date
This girl confided in me and said that she hates telling guys she's dating, because the minute they find out, they just ignore her. That sucks to hear. People can be dicks.
So I just had a realisation hit me. I left my job at Tesco today after almost 5 years, which is pretty much 1/4 of my life so far. A lot has happened in those 5 years. I'm starting at Royal Mail tomorrow, and it's the start of a new chapter in my life. But originally, things were supposed to be very different if I managed to get this job. It was going to mean the start of independent life, I would be moving out of the house I currently share with my parents, and into an amazing little flat about 12 miles away with the girl I then considered to be the love of my life. We'd been planning to move into a place of our own for ages, and we'd been waiting forever for something that good to come up. It was perfect for us. It was smack in the middle of our jobs, in a great little village with a small shop a short walk away. A few of my mates were close by as well. Now I'm sitting in my room in my parents house, alone. Things are looking up for me with this job. I'll have disposable income for the first time in ages, and my social life has taken a turn for the better, at least outside of work. But I still can't believe that the girl I loved so much could have felt the way she did and never tell me. I never hid anything from her but she would just never tell me how she felt and I don't understand why. There are so many things that I want to ask, so many answers I want, but I know that it's probably best that I don't ask, and don't get the answers because I know that I most likely not like what I hear. A lot of people think that I'm doing fine. I guess for the most part I am, or maybe I tricked myself into thinking I am. But right now I just don't understand how she could hurt me like this.
So I have quite the situation, my girlfriend now is off and on with me, it normally happens every six or so months. She was living with me and she left, then she came back and is now living with her grandma, but this is the seventh or eighth time shes left.. I can't really describe how I'm feeling, I enjoy the relationship but at this point in time I don't really know if it's going to work, my whole family hates her, and I'm just unsure of what to do.
[QUOTE=S33T;46520531]So I have quite the situation, my girlfriend now is off and on with me, it normally happens every six or so months. She was living with me and she left, then she came back and is now living with her grandma, but this is the seventh or eighth time shes left.. I can't really describe how I'm feeling, I enjoy the relationship but at this point in time I don't really know if it's going to work, my whole family hates her, and I'm just unsure of what to do.[/QUOTE] You need to end it and let go. If she keeps on trying to leave, then she's not coming back to you because she has any interest in trying to fix your relationship - she's coming back because she misses the comfort and familiarity of it. Don't waste any more time on someone who doesn't respect your emotions. [editline]18th November 2014[/editline] And for god's sake, you NEED to set some standards of how you want to be treated. Breaking up with someone that many times is absolutely unacceptable and by shrugging it off you're just telling her that you're okay with her continuing to do it.
I was recently dumped and I am really beat up about it. Any coping tips?
try to not be alone if you can help it
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;46520948]You need to end it and let go. If she keeps on trying to leave, then she's not coming back to you because she has any interest in trying to fix your relationship - she's coming back because she misses the comfort and familiarity of it. Don't waste any more time on someone who doesn't respect your emotions. [editline]18th November 2014[/editline] And for god's sake, you NEED to set some standards of how you want to be treated. Breaking up with someone that many times is absolutely unacceptable and by shrugging it off you're just telling her that you're okay with her continuing to do it.[/QUOTE] Honestly I don't have any self esteem so that's probably why.
[QUOTE=S33T;46521412]Honestly I don't have any self esteem so that's probably why.[/QUOTE] Look at the things you do right and are good at. Start realising that you can do a lot of good, and need to be treated like someone worthy of respect. Start by respecting yourself, otherwise nobody else will for you.
Just got rejected by my crush! I admit I fucked up horribly by texting them to ask them out instead of doing it in person but I panicked when I remembered the last time a crush rejected me they said I waited too long to do it and I didn't want that to happen again. But on the other hand: I didn't clam up when they said no. I stopped, thought about how yeah getting rejected sucks but at the end of the day we're still friends, then kept talking. Maybe in round 3 I'll ask a crush out in time AND in person but for right now I'm fine with this since it's already going better than the last time when I stopped dealing with emotions for like 2 weeks after and then acted like nothing happened.
[QUOTE=Plattack;46521608]Just got rejected by my crush! I admit I fucked up horribly by texting them to ask them out instead of doing it in person but I panicked when I remembered the last time a crush rejected me they said I waited too long to do it and I didn't want that to happen again. But on the other hand: I didn't clam up when they said no. I stopped, thought about how yeah getting rejected sucks but at the end of the day we're still friends, then kept talking. Maybe in round 3 I'll ask a crush out in time AND in person but for right now I'm fine with this since it's already going better than the last time when I stopped dealing with emotions for like 2 weeks after and then acted like nothing happened.[/QUOTE] Unfortunately there isn't a right time. If I had asked my GF out earlier than I did she'd have rejected me. You just have to catch any chance you get once you two are both comfortable with each other. [editline]19th November 2014[/editline] [QUOTE=Doctor_Brony;46520995]I was recently dumped and I am really beat up about it. Any coping tips?[/QUOTE] Do what you enjoy most, be it friends, sports or hobbies. Drown yourself in what distracts you and soon the bad taste will wear down.
[QUOTE=SebiWarrior;46521812]Unfortunately there isn't a right time. If I had asked my GF out earlier than I did she'd have rejected me. You just have to catch any chance you get once you two are both comfortable with each other.[/QUOTE] I meant a shorter time than I did, which was too long. I asked out my last crush after we were best friends for like a year and a half at which point I should have known she was going to say no and I sort of saw the same thing happening so I panicked.
[QUOTE=Plattack;46521845]I meant a shorter time than I did, which was too long. I asked out my last crush after we were best friends for like a year and a half at which point I should have known she was going to say no and I sort of saw the same thing happening so I panicked.[/QUOTE] I always feel like once you become a lady's best friend you have rare chances of becoming a boyfriend. I could be saying something very dumb but I feel like a woman's best friend is a boyfriend without the sex. Sometimes a best friend gets to know the person better than the boyfriend ever will. They're more open to friends than their lover.
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