Super Friendly Social and Love Advice V6 - JUST FUCKING ASK HER OUT

[Taepodong-2]

Fuck, all of a sudden I'm feeling like I probably fucked up with this girl. Like, I've known her since the middle of October and even though we have spent some time together outside of class, I feel like since I didn't try to escalate things yet and because I'm really fucking bad at flirting I may have fucked up and, as much as we don't like this term, will probably get friend-zoned. How do I prevent this? Keeping in mind between now and early January I'm not going to have a chance to see her and our only contact in that time will probably be texting.

[Dysentery]

[QUOTE=loopoo;46661621]I just felt like I'd be taking advantage of the situation, since I knew she was drunk and would do things she otherwise normally wouldn't. I came close a few times but I dunno, I'd feel pretty shitty knowing she might wake up tomorrow and think "I made a mistake". Plus, she's a coursemate, and is one of my main group of friends, I wouldn't want things to go south and cock up the group dynamic.[/QUOTE]

she's sober now bro, ask her and see what happens. i'm sure she won't hate you if you ask her and she doesn't want to

[Guy Mannly]

[QUOTE=loopoo;46661621]I just felt like I'd be taking advantage of the situation, since I knew she was drunk and would do things she otherwise normally wouldn't. I came close a few times but I dunno, I'd feel pretty shitty knowing she might wake up tomorrow and think "I made a mistake". Plus, she's a coursemate, and is one of my main group of friends, I wouldn't want things to go south and cock up the group dynamic.[/QUOTE]

You made the right choice in holding off while she was drunk. She's clearly still interested in you now that she's sober, so go for it!

[blerb]

[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;46662040]Fuck, all of a sudden I'm feeling like I probably fucked up with this girl. Like, I've known her since the middle of October and even though we have spent some time together outside of class, I feel like since I didn't try to escalate things yet and because I'm really fucking bad at flirting I may have fucked up and, as much as we don't like this term, will probably get friend-zoned. How do I prevent this? Keeping in mind between now and early January I'm not going to have a chance to see her and our only contact in that time will probably be texting.[/QUOTE]

It sounds like you're stressing out about it too much. I've mostly lurked here and kept with your posts, and to sunmarize, it seems like you just struggle with self confidence. I'm in much of the same boat, so I know exactly how you feel. However, if you ever want to get out if it, you're going to have to subject yourself to women, and the pain of rejection that sometimes comes along with them. It sucks, but that's the nature of it.

I know you want this to work, but the more you sit around and think about it, the more she will get the impression that either A) you're not interested or B) you're spineless. Neither are good. So, Whenever you have the time to text her and talk, just do it. Don't worry about the possibility of fucking up, as that's just going to lead to a self-fulfilled prophecy (as it's slowly been building towards). Just be honest with her, inquire about stuff you'd like to know (how's your day going? What's new?) Ask her wbout her interests, her motivations, anything.

Even if you end up in the friend zone, it's not the end of the world. Who knows, if you're capable of moving past your current feelings for her in that event, she may make a very good friend. Some of the best friends I've had have been women. As long as you're capable of keeping your feelings (and your dick) under control, that is.

When it comes to dealing with your confidence there are multiple things you can do to help. Working out and ewting properly are the biggest imo, as after a while of doing it, you're going to be very physically attractive to other people, which is a large factor. I've been working out for 2 months after injuring myself previously, and I've noticed very large gains in self confidence.

You can also educate yourself on things you find interesting. Yeah that's what school is for I guess, but it never hurts to do a little on the side if you can afford the time. It's great because it expands your mental horizons, opens your mind, and perhaps most importantly, is plain satisfying. Learning a new language, studying a particular subject (I would recommend history though iirc you're in school for it?), learning a trade, anything. Doing this also builds character, which is essential if you want any women to actually stick around longer than the first couple of dates.

However, in my honest opinion, I think the most important thing when it comes to your quality of life is disconnecting from your need of a relationship. I know it's hypocritical coming from me considering some of my previous posts here, but just think about it like this: who do you find are usually the most attractive women? Those who are beautiful? Intelligent? Humourous? Honest? Sexual? Whatever it may be for you, think about how they built that character. I can tell you that they didn't build it worrying about whether their potential mates were mutually interested. It's a natural feeling (again, one I am guilty of myself, quite frequently) so it's something that will take time to get rid of, if it's even possible for guys like us to do. But what would you consider better; being content with yourself and who you are, who you strive to be, and your abilities? Or constantly thinking about the impression you leave on people, essentially questioning who you are?

[Taepodong-2]

Alright. Since I'm most likely not going to get a chance to talk to her in person again until early January I'll just keep in touch with her through text until then and then ask her out when school starts again and see where it goes from there.

And hey, she's the third girl I've had any serious interest in since starting university so third time's the charm maybe :v:

[Banandana]

I went to the Intel Extreme Masters tournament for League of Legends.

I don't play league.

I don't understand the game.

But the lady that was walking around helping people was really cute so I was hitting on her the whole time. Turns out she has a boyfriend.

It also turns out that she works at intel as a hardware engineer.

Everyone else was running around getting signatures from pro gamers, and I'm networking so I could possibly get a fucking job at intel.

Intel.

I ended up talking to about 4-5 people from intel and the software engineers told me that if I had my project I'm working on finished, I'd get picked up by intel really easily.

Sheiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit

Also I learned how to hit on girls and not be terrible at it.

Shoutout to the people who posted this because it was really helpful and they know what they're talking about:

[QUOTE=Ostegolation;46660465]Dude, you have nothing to lose and everything to gain in life. Go out there and do it! You'll regret what you didn't do more than what you did do! The master has failed even more times than the beginner has even tried![/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;46658829]Guys, for future reference. 99% of the time, the answer to "is it normal" is going to be yes. If something ISN'T normal, you won't need to ask to know.[/QUOTE]

[editline]7th December 2014[/editline]

Sorry for the bad post formatting, but I can't stop thinking of how fucking cool that'd be, working at somewhere like that...and how cool she is.

[Remedial Math]

focus on the first part and not the last part because she has a bf

[Banandana]

I can wait

[sp]I'm only partially kidding. She really was awesome. :/[/sp]

[Loopoo]

I'm a massive pussy and I've not got the balls to ask her out to dinner, though to be fair, I was really confident yesterday, but she hasn't messaged me at all today, so I feel meh about it and have lost my nerve. I'm doing that thing where I'll look back on the events of Saturday night and I'm just chalking it up to her being very drunk. This is a silly feeling.

I'm going to wait and see if she's gonna message me and ask me if I'm coming out tonight. If she does, I'll take it as a good sign. If not, I don't think I'll pursue this.

[Rhenae]

[QUOTE=loopoo;46668414]I'm a massive pussy and I've not got the balls to ask her out to dinner, though to be fair, I was really confident yesterday, but she hasn't messaged me at all today, so I feel meh about it and have lost my nerve. I'm doing that thing where I'll look back on the events of Saturday night and I'm just chalking it up to her being very drunk. This is a silly feeling.

I'm going to wait and see if she's gonna message me and ask me if I'm coming out tonight. If she does, I'll take it as a good sign. If not, I don't think I'll pursue this.[/QUOTE]

Have you considered maybe she is doing the same thing and waiting for you to message her?

[Loopoo]

Yeah I have but then second-guessing myself every time is gonna drive me nuts. I messaged her telling her to have a good night, that's all I'm gonna do for tonight. Will see them tomorrow anyhow, since we're in lectures all day.

[Genericenemy]

[QUOTE=loopoo;46669056]Yeah I have but then second-guessing myself every time is gonna drive me nuts. I messaged her telling her to have a good night, that's all I'm gonna do for tonight. Will see them tomorrow anyhow, since we're in lectures all day.[/QUOTE]

In all my time lurking here I never thought you would be the sort of person to be scared of asking someone out. I think historically that was my weakness but I've got over it, hoping to ask a girl out in my mathematics class soon providing I get some more evidence that she may actually be into me.

[Loopoo]

With girls who I don't see on a regular basis, I'm perfectly fine. Worst case scenario they say no, it's no biggie. But with this one, she's in my main group of friends, so I think the reason I'm being such a chickenshit is due to the fact I can't help but worry about messing up the group dynamic.

Don't worry, no harm in waiting a couple days. Though as time goes on, I really am starting to feel like perhaps it was just the Jack Daniels talking.

[Patrick]

I gave a girl my number on saturday night and she texted me but I don't remember her name, whats the best way of asking her?

[Jake]

[QUOTE=Pat.Lithium;46670237]I gave a girl my number on saturday night and she texted me but I don't remember her name, whats the best way of asking her?[/QUOTE]

Ask them how their name is spelled so you can put her into your contacts.

It's a legitimate enough excuse to find out what her name is again.

[Patrick]

but Im pretty sure it was something like Emily or Emma

[Flumbooze]

[QUOTE=loopoo;46670082]With girls who I don't see on a regular basis, I'm perfectly fine. Worst case scenario they say no, it's no biggie. But with this one, she's in my main group of friends, so I think the reason I'm being such a chickenshit is due to the fact I can't help but worry about messing up the group dynamic.

Don't worry, no harm in waiting a couple days. Though as time goes on, I really am starting to feel like perhaps it was just the Jack Daniels talking.[/QUOTE]

To be honest, you could just invite her to do something fun without necessarily making it look like a date. If you do that, you'll know soon enough if it was just the Jack Daniels talking.

[Remedial Math]

[QUOTE=Pat.Lithium;46670281]but Im pretty sure it was something like Emily or Emma[/QUOTE]

"...it's E-M-M-A. Duh."

"No, I meant your LAST name."

ezpz

[Banandana]

That's fucking smooth

[Patrick]

Fuck it I just asked her it was Emelia, that was way easy. What do I do now she texted me a smiley face after I said thanks.

[Banandana]

Ask her out or something

[Patrick]

We met at a club I touched her butt and she put her tongue down my throat

[Banandana]

[QUOTE=Pat.Lithium;46670868]We met at a club I touched her butt and she put her tongue down my throat[/QUOTE]

Then fucking ask her out and do it again

[Taepodong-2]

[QUOTE=Pat.Lithium;46670868]We met at a club I touched her butt and she put her tongue down my throat[/QUOTE]

Ask her out and put your dick down her throat

[Remedial Math]

i read that as you touched her throat and she put her tongue in your butt

[Kindlinho]

[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;46671091]Ask her out and put your dick down her throat[/QUOTE]
I find it extremely hilarious coming from you, the guy who's been stressing out and overanalyzing things here. It's just disarming, lol.

On the topic of drunk kissing: It's just an alcohol-empowered kiss. No biggie. If you do it and it still bothers you the next day, then just talk about it with the person that took part in this operation with you.

[Taepodong-2]

[QUOTE=Kindlinho;46671311]I find it extremely hilarious coming from you, the guy who's been stressing out and overanalyzing things here. It's just disarming, lol.
[/QUOTE]

Attractive girls break my brain. If it seems like they're not interested I force myself to believe they actually are by overanalyzing every little thing, but if it seems like they are interested I make myself believe it can't possibly be true and overanalyze every little thing. Doesn't mean I can't joke about sticking dicks down throats.

[editline]8th December 2014[/editline]

I mean hell it's not like that's not what I'm trying to do here :v:

[OogalaBoogal]

[QUOTE=Banandana;46665739]I went to the Intel Extreme Masters tournament for League of Legends.

I don't play league.

I don't understand the game.

But the lady that was walking around helping people was really cute so I was hitting on her the whole time. Turns out she has a boyfriend.

It also turns out that she works at intel as a hardware engineer.

Everyone else was running around getting signatures from pro gamers, and I'm networking so I could possibly get a fucking job at intel.

Intel.

I ended up talking to about 4-5 people from intel and the software engineers told me that if I had my project I'm working on finished, I'd get picked up by intel really easily.

Sheiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit

Also I learned how to hit on girls and not be terrible at it.

Shoutout to the people who posted this because it was really helpful and they know what they're talking about:

[editline]7th December 2014[/editline]

Sorry for the bad post formatting, but I can't stop thinking of how fucking cool that'd be, working at somewhere like that...and how cool she is.[/QUOTE]

Curious, what are you working on right now?

[Banandana]

I'm working on a library in C# that parses Java source code.

Update: I have more contacts from intel. I ended up seeing a post the girl I was talking about got tagged in and like 3 other people I recognized and talked to a bit were there.

[titopei]

help, i know how to write run on sentences

I met a girl two weeks ago while playing ddr and we really started hitting it off and we hang out and flirt a lot but then I learned she had a bf but my friends sister whos close with her says her relationship with the bf isn't that good and that i should go for it, help.

rough translation

I met a girl about two weeks ago and we started getting really close. She's really fun to hang around with but then at the same time we're somewhat flirty, although I am unsure if she is just really friendly or actually likes me mostly because she has a bf. All I know is that she talks to me differently compared to the other guys in the ddr group we play with. Also, according to my friends sister, she said their relationship isn't that good so I should just go for it.