Super Friendly Social and Love Advice V6 - JUST FUCKING ASK HER OUT

[Boss]

Was waiting for this guy to turn up fucking legend.

[killerteacup]

[QUOTE=Sprocket Shit;40863306]Nothing sleazy about shit, it's the feminists fault for raising all this hubbub about giving women choices without realizing that they have to teach women how to make choices in the first fucking place before they get to have the right to make their own choices. Now we've got women who have no idea how to handle relationships or even how to drive safely. Now men have to resort to subtly giving women the illusion that they have a choice in order to get them to make a choice.[/QUOTE]

hahaha yesss

I mean this is probably the most unacceptable post in the world but I can't help but laugh

[MaverickIB]

God damn I love Sprocket Shit.

EDIT: Wow he got banned again :(((((

[Aurastorm]

[QUOTE=MaverickIB;40859245]Not sure if anyone remembers my tips on how to steal a girl from her boyfriend, but the concept is similar. Best thing you can do is not talk about it. Be the best guy in the world to her, obviously retaining respect for yourself (don't become a puppy who follows her around and all that jazz), but generally being an awesome dude. If she brings up her relationship, avoid the subject, deflect into a different topic.

Essentially, get her mind off of it. "Out of sight, out of mind." But in this case, out of sight means avoid talking about that shit like the plague. The more you talk about it, the more she will think about it, the longer it will take to move on.

You're pretty much trying to get her to think, "Whoah, when I'm with _____ I forget about all that depressing shit and actually feel happy." However, she has to come to that conclusion for herself. Like inception, you cannot directly plant the idea into her head by saying, "You're happier around me, right?" You have to clue it into her and let her draw the conclusion by herself.[/QUOTE]

i really have no idea what im reading here

[ScoutKing]

Its just not the same anymore reading these arguments....

[Zinayzen]

i loved sprocket :( rip

[♠️♥️♦️♣️]

blast from the past holy [b]shit[/b]

[thisispain]

[QUOTE=Sprocket Shit;40863306]Nothing sleazy about shit, it's the feminists fault for raising all this hubbub about giving women choices without realizing that they have to teach women how to make choices in the first fucking place before they get to have the right to make their own choices. Now we've got women who have no idea how to handle relationships or even how to drive safely. Now men have to resort to subtly giving women the illusion that they have a choice in order to get them to make a choice.

[highlight](User was permabanned for this post ("Trolling - Ban history" - Megafan))[/highlight][/QUOTE]

woa epic trolls m8

[Septok]

You guys forgot sprocket alpha. Jesus christ my old posts sucked shit like Grandmaster White Knight Megafan.

Either way I've had more than my fill of hipster/white knight mods, Maverick's essays that everybody draws conclusions off of in the first sentence, and the general "broken record" nature of Facepunch users. I don't know why I conveniently felt compelled to check out FP a few days after garry unbanned everybody, but now I remember why I made no effort to make another account after spreading the good word of why feminists and white knights are retarded and need to fuck off because they're too busy stroking each other to fuck themselves.

[highlight](User was permabanned for this post ("Trolling" - Megafan))[/highlight]

[killerteacup]

okay this definitely tops both sprocket shit and maverick

septok are you still afraid of vaginas

[thisispain]

[QUOTE=Septok;40872012]You guys forgot sprocket alpha. Jesus christ my old posts sucked shit like Grandmaster White Knight Megafan.

Either way I've had more than my fill of hipster/white knight mods, Maverick's essays that everybody draws conclusions off of in the first sentence, and the general "broken record" nature of Facepunch users. I don't know why I conveniently felt compelled to check out FP a few days after garry unbanned everybody, but now I remember why I made no effort to make another account after spreading the good word of why feminists and white knights are retarded and need to fuck off because they're too busy stroking each other to fuck themselves.[/QUOTE]

snore

[Riku2211]

Okay well disregarding apparently infamous people popping up I need to at least get shit off my chest because i STILL haven't moved on for shit and I don't really think there's much else I expect anyone here to say that's any different from before but just holy shit, prepare for depressing wall of text.

I am far from over my ex. I honestly do not know how to get over her. I've tried to stop thinking about her, there are no immediate reminders of her existence anywhere in my house, and yet I can't get past it. For a little while it was okay, but it just completely started coming back to me these last few weeks. It seems like instead of gradually getting over it, I immediately got over it then slowly regressed and I can't stop. I can't help but remember things we did and remember how great we were together (at the very least, for a time), and I can't help but ask myself "What if I did something different, or changed something about myself?", or "What happened to the girl I fell in love with?". I have ample distractions throughout the day, but in between and even while I'm doing other things, especially if they involve being out and about, I still think about her, just spontaneously for no reason or I'm reminded of her by something. I can't stop telling myself she was the only thing that ever made me happy, because it's sort of the truth. It's pathetic to say, but, I mean, most of my life has consisted of video games and, well, video games. I feel like I need a different outlook on it, but since that seems to be the truth I just can't change my perspective on the matter. Even looking ahead and thinking about how good the future could be, how I could meet someone else and have an even better relationship, I just don't feel optimistic, and I just want to go back to how things were. She is just perfect to me. Maybe she's not perfect FOR me, but I just love everything about her. I have never met anyone like her. I sit around during the day, sick of gaming and shitting around on the internet, and wish I could just go for a walk with her and get out of this prison I pretty much made for myself.

Which is another thing, I absolutely hate my life without her. When she was around we could go places, hang out, walk around, just talk, whatever, you know? Now I'm back to sitting here all day with nothing else to do. I sort of think, "Maybe it's time I changed something", but what is there to change? What else can I even do? I'll be totally honest, I've looked at her Facebook a couple times. Not really "stalker-status" but yeah I realize it's not... healthy, for me, nor is it not weird/creepy. She never updates it, she hardly ever has, but last I saw she uploaded a picture of her at a carnival or something, and that just puts my own life further in perspective. There she is, enjoying life and actually DOING things (completely over me), while I continue to sit here and wallow in my own depression, and I feel like there is absolutely nothing I can do about it. I actually envy her; she got out of our relationship then went right back to her own life, which actually vastly improved after breaking up with me, as she told me when we started talking again and as I've observed myself, and I'm still at square one. Not to mention the fact that after breaking up with me she started getting much closer to her mom, and I've just gotten further away. I've somewhat grown to resent her, honestly. I have no relationship with my own mother. My life was garbage before she came along and it's garbage now.

I think if I WANTED to get over her, it'd be at least a bit easier, but I just don't think I really do. Well, let me rephrase that; I DO want to move on, but I don't want to get over her. Maybe I'm young and naive, but I really love her. She's just perfect, I can't think of a single flaw, nor a single reason to dislike her or resent her at all, as if that's really necessary. The only thing wrong is our personalities and how different they are. And honestly, it's only made worse by the fact that I'm so thoroughly convinced I can't find anyone who's more like me than she is, not a guy OR a girl. Hell I think I'd be pretty okay with life if I just had some friend who shared my mindset and my interest in comics and gaming. None of my friends do. They're gamers, mostly, but are into completely different games and have no interest in comics and the like, and they think nothing like I do. I don't want a copy of me, but someone who I can talk to and actually gets it. SHE got it. I could say anything and she could either agree with me or level with me. We could have fantastically intellectual arguments and discussions about things that would go on for possibly hours, and it felt amazing. Like I said, I have never met anyone like her. I feel entirely alone at school and home. My closest friends live on the other side of the country, and my only interaction with them is games and text on a screen.

I realize I should be able to live my own life without caring about 'love' and stuff like that and that I should be happy just being myself but I really cannot. I can't help but feel so utterly, cripplingly lonely, with this huge hole in my life remaining so empty. I think part of this is me trying to grasp at and hold onto the one time in my life during which that hole was filled and I could actually enjoy life as it was, and part of it is me being in love with her. I know it's pathetic, and I know I'M pretty pathetic, at least at this time in my life I am. I am so utterly depressed, the only escape being gaming, but once I'm left to my own devices for more than ten minutes I just get... sad. Even before I start thinking about her, I'm just sad. I feel like I've not got much to live for, nor do I have much in my future. I know I'm going to college, and everyone expects me to go to college, but what then? I don't know what to major in, I have no skills or talents, at the moment I'm just going into game design because shit I've got no other choice. No other career out there seems even slightly enticing, and I'm still not thrilled over having a job where I do exactly what I do at home: sit in front of a computer. I've been thinking about where to apply for a summer job and even still there's no where I WANT to work. I don't even really care about WANTING to work at a place, honestly, it's just the part where I start thinking about "Could I actually do this" where my low self-confidence steps in and says I'd totally fuck it up. I'm fine with working, in fact I'd revel the chance to just be out of the house and focused on something that no less earns me money, I just don't think I could succeed. Then I think about how well my ex is doing and I'm discouraged even further. She's literally a straight A student, and I'm more than confident she's not far from landing a job somewhere. Not because she's a straight A student, but because she's capable of being a straight A student. She's a hard worker and knows what she's doing. I'm not lazy at all, but most of the time I'm afraid I'm doing something wrong. I feel like I'd need extensive instruction on what I'm doing. I have entirely no self-esteem or confidence.

I guess I kind of went off on a tangent but this all is what's been filling my mind to the brim these past few weeks. My life has been absolutely miserable, and getting out of school didn't help. The only consolation is not seeing her every day, but it doesn't really matter because I still think about her every day. I don't even know why I'm posting all this. I guess it feels a bit better to talk about it. No, who am I kidding, I don't feel any better at all. I guess maybe I kind of hope for some advice other than "just stop thinking about her" because clearly I'm not physically capable of that. I really don't know what to do. I'd prefer it if I just didn't have to deal with any of this shit. I'd say that I'd prefer it if I was just dead but I don't want to sound suicidal. My life is nothing but anger and misery, and it only hits my self esteem even harder that I'm like this, that I seriously got so hung up over one girl and can't even stand up and take my trials with stride, and instead I'm on the ground giving up. Everything I say or do or think only makes me hate myself even more. I mean holy shit, I'm posting about how I have a shitton of issues in a social and love advice thread on an internet forum. Well, I guess most of this has to do with love, and some of it social stuff. I don't know, I always feel like I'm breaking some code of conduct when I go off-topic at all.

I guess that's really all there is to say on the matter. I know you guys aren't therapists or psychiatrists or anything but I don't have much anywhere else to go with all this. That ended up being a bigger wall of text than I expected. Sorry :v:

[b]TL;DR:[/b] I'm lonely, I cant get over a girl, my life sucks, I have literally no self-esteem or confidence, and I just generally have a lot of issues.

[OogalaBoogal]

[QUOTE=riku2211;40873906][b]TL;DR:[/b] I'm lonely, I cant get over a girl, my life sucks, I have literally no self-esteem or confidence, and I just generally have a lot of issues.[/QUOTE]

I read all of this and I'm going to make a long reply full of life advice, but let me get my breakfast first.

[killerteacup]

[QUOTE=OogalaBoogal;40875619]I read all of this and I'm going to make a long reply full of life advice, but let me get my breakfast first.[/QUOTE]

oogala has gotta have his weety bix before giving out sage wisdom

[OogalaBoogal]

[QUOTE=killerteacup;40875630]oogala has gotta have his weety bix before giving out sage wisdom[/QUOTE]

seriously, i do. i didn't get to though, i cleaned my kitchen instead because my brother just doesn't. all i got was a cup of coffee.

Okay, time for advice.

[QUOTE=riku2211;40873906]Okay well disregarding apparently infamous people popping up I need to at least get shit off my chest because i STILL haven't moved on for shit and I don't really think there's much else I expect anyone here to say that's any different from before but just holy shit, prepare for depressing wall of text.

I am far from over my ex. I honestly do not know how to get over her. I've tried to stop thinking about her, there are no immediate reminders of her existence anywhere in my house, and yet I can't get past it. For a little while it was okay, but it just completely started coming back to me these last few weeks. It seems like instead of gradually getting over it, I immediately got over it then slowly regressed and I can't stop. I can't help but remember things we did and remember how great we were together (at the very least, for a time), and I can't help but ask myself "What if I did something different, or changed something about myself?", or "What happened to the girl I fell in love with?". I have ample distractions throughout the day, but in between and even while I'm doing other things, especially if they involve being out and about, I still think about her, just spontaneously for no reason or I'm reminded of her by something. I can't stop telling myself she was the only thing that ever made me happy, because it's sort of the truth. It's pathetic to say, but, I mean, most of my life has consisted of video games and, well, video games. I feel like I need a different outlook on it, but since that seems to be the truth I just can't change my perspective on the matter. Even looking ahead and thinking about how good the future could be, how I could meet someone else and have an even better relationship, I just don't feel optimistic, and I just want to go back to how things were. She is just perfect to me. Maybe she's not perfect FOR me, but I just love everything about her. I have never met anyone like her. I sit around during the day, sick of gaming and shitting around on the internet, and wish I could just go for a walk with her and get out of this prison I pretty much made for myself. [/Quote]

You can't change the past, stop worrying about it! She's not perfect for you, she broke up with you. You might have not been the person she wanted, and you can't change that, no matter how you could have acted differently.

I know this forum is primarily based around the playing of video games, but ever since I reduced my time playing video games from 3 or 4 hours a day to maybe 2 a week I've been much happier. I now use my iPhone more than I use my PC. Go learn how to do other things, get involved with groups, pick up a sport, try new things, go new places. You should try changing your mindset from "I can't do that" to "~Maybe~ I can do that". It works wonders!

[Quote]
Which is another thing, I absolutely hate my life without her. When she was around we could go places, hang out, walk around, just talk, whatever, you know? Now I'm back to sitting here all day with nothing else to do. I sort of think, "Maybe it's time I changed something", but what is there to change? What else can I even do? I'll be totally honest, I've looked at her Facebook a couple times. Not really "stalker-status" but yeah I realize it's not... healthy, for me, nor is it not weird/creepy. She never updates it, she hardly ever has, but last I saw she uploaded a picture of her at a carnival or something, and that just puts my own life further in perspective. There she is, enjoying life and actually DOING things (completely over me), while I continue to sit here and wallow in my own depression, and I feel like there is absolutely nothing I can do about it. I actually envy her; she got out of our relationship then went right back to her own life, which actually vastly improved after breaking up with me, as she told me when we started talking again and as I've observed myself, and I'm still at square one. Not to mention the fact that after breaking up with me she started getting much closer to her mom, and I've just gotten further away. I've somewhat grown to resent her, honestly. I have no relationship with my own mother. My life was garbage before she came along and it's garbage now.
[/quote]
The only thing keeping you from hanging out, walking around, and talking with others is yourself. Phone up your friends. Go do things. Watch a movie. Go out for dinner. It's not too hard.

[quote]
I think if I WANTED to get over her, it'd be at least a bit easier, but I just don't think I really do. Well, let me rephrase that; I DO want to move on, but I don't want to get over her. Maybe I'm young and naive, but I really love her. She's just perfect, I can't think of a single flaw, nor a single reason to dislike her or resent her at all, as if that's really necessary. The only thing wrong is our personalities and how different they are. And honestly, it's only made worse by the fact that I'm so thoroughly convinced I can't find anyone who's more like me than she is, not a guy OR a girl. Hell I think I'd be pretty okay with life if I just had some friend who shared my mindset and my interest in comics and gaming. None of my friends do. They're gamers, mostly, but are into completely different games and have no interest in comics and the like, and they think nothing like I do. I don't want a copy of me, but someone who I can talk to and actually gets it. SHE got it. I could say anything and she could either agree with me or level with me. We could have fantastically intellectual arguments and discussions about things that would go on for possibly hours, and it felt amazing. Like I said, I have never met anyone like her. I feel entirely alone at school and home. My closest friends live on the other side of the country, and my only interaction with them is games and text on a screen.
[/quote]
You'll move on and get over her. There is ALWAYS someone better. There are also people who share the same likes as you closer than you think! You just have to look in the right places!

It's also really important to know that clashing personalities make for relationships that don't work. You need personalities that complement one another. No matter how much it may seem like it can work, it won't.
[quote]
I realize I should be able to live my own life without caring about 'love' and stuff like that and that I should be happy just being myself but I really cannot. I can't help but feel so utterly, cripplingly lonely, with this huge hole in my life remaining so empty. I think part of this is me trying to grasp at and hold onto the one time in my life during which that hole was filled and I could actually enjoy life as it was, and part of it is me being in love with her. I know it's pathetic, and I know I'M pretty pathetic, at least at this time in my life I am. I am so utterly depressed, the only escape being gaming, but once I'm left to my own devices for more than ten minutes I just get... sad. Even before I start thinking about her, I'm just sad. I feel like I've not got much to live for, nor do I have much in my future. I know I'm going to college, and everyone expects me to go to college, but what then? I don't know what to major in, I have no skills or talents, at the moment I'm just going into game design because shit I've got no other choice. No other career out there seems even slightly enticing, and I'm still not thrilled over having a job where I do exactly what I do at home: sit in front of a computer. I've been thinking about where to apply for a summer job and even still there's no where I WANT to work. I don't even really care about WANTING to work at a place, honestly, it's just the part where I start thinking about "Could I actually do this" where my low self-confidence steps in and says I'd totally fuck it up. I'm fine with working, in fact I'd revel the chance to just be out of the house and focused on something that no less earns me money, I just don't think I could succeed. Then I think about how well my ex is doing and I'm discouraged even further. She's literally a straight A student, and I'm more than confident she's not far from landing a job somewhere. Not because she's a straight A student, but because she's capable of being a straight A student. She's a hard worker and knows what she's doing. I'm not lazy at all, but most of the time I'm afraid I'm doing something wrong. I feel like I'd need extensive instruction on what I'm doing. I have entirely no self-esteem or confidence.
[/quote]
Get other escapes than gaming. You can develop these skills and talents you need and want right now. Download Unity, watch video tutorials. Learn.

For your summer job, just apply everywhere, it really doesn't matter where you work, all you need is experience at first. See if anyone you know can help you get your foot in the door. Your ex has nothing at all to do with your performance. I've always felt bad because I felt my exes were going farther than me, but then I doubled down on my efforts, and I've left them all in the dust. You don't have to worry about screwing up, often just continually trying your best is good enough, heck, just trying usually is!

[quote]
I guess I kind of went off on a tangent but this all is what's been filling my mind to the brim these past few weeks. My life has been absolutely miserable, and getting out of school didn't help. The only consolation is not seeing her every day, but it doesn't really matter because I still think about her every day. I don't even know why I'm posting all this. I guess it feels a bit better to talk about it. No, who am I kidding, I don't feel any better at all. I guess maybe I kind of hope for some advice other than "just stop thinking about her" because clearly I'm not physically capable of that. I really don't know what to do. I'd prefer it if I just didn't have to deal with any of this shit. I'd say that I'd prefer it if I was just dead but I don't want to sound suicidal. My life is nothing but anger and misery, and it only hits my self esteem even harder that I'm like this, that I seriously got so hung up over one girl and can't even stand up and take my trials with stride, and instead I'm on the ground giving up. Everything I say or do or think only makes me hate myself even more. I mean holy shit, I'm posting about how I have a shitton of issues in a social and love advice thread on an internet forum. Well, I guess most of this has to do with love, and some of it social stuff. I don't know, I always feel like I'm breaking some code of conduct when I go off-topic at all.

I guess that's really all there is to say on the matter. I know you guys aren't therapists or psychiatrists or anything but I don't have much anywhere else to go with all this. That ended up being a bigger wall of text than I expected. Sorry :v:

[b]TL;DR:[/b] I'm lonely, I cant get over a girl, my life sucks, I have literally no self-esteem or confidence, and I just generally have a lot of issues.[/QUOTE]

It takes can take a long time and lots to get over someone that you really care about, but you can totally do it.

[editline]2nd June 2013[/editline]

now im getting my long overdue breakfast!

[MaverickIB]

You need to realize how you picture her is not how she is.

It's pretty damn clear she broke up with you while you were still in the heavy infatuation phase. You think she's this perfect individual who is amazing and the best person ever and yadda yadda yadda. She probably felt the same way about you once, but her infatuation died out before yours did and once she realized who you really are (not saying you're a bad person or anything) she didn't want to be with you. You just weren't her cup of tea.

If you had stayed with her long enough, your infatuation would too fade and you'd realize she isn't a perfect individual. What you are feeling isn't love, it's withdrawals. The best solution is pretty obvious, find other things to do, which is easier than you think. But like you said, you don't want to get over her. Because you have this picture of her in your head as this perfect girl. [b]She is not perfect.[/b] There are other girls out there who are just as good if not better than her. Plenty of them.

I've been down that road too many times. Tons of people have. You think the last person you were with was the best you'll ever find, sit and mope for a while, then when you finally decide to get out into the fray again, you meet someone better and feel like a fucking idiot for wasting all of that time.

It's a mind game with yourself. Your subconscious brain will tell you she's perfect and you want her back. Consciously, you need to force yourself to realize there are better people out there. People who won't ditch you the second they aren't infatuated anymore. People who will make you happier than she ever could. Your infatuation will tell you this isn't true. Infatuation [i]lies.[/i] Like any addict going through withdrawals, your mind is going to tell you whatever it can to get you to go back to whatever it was you're addicted to. It's lying. You don't need another cigarette. You don't need another drink. You don't need to be with this girl.

[dmillerw]

Well, I think I know how I'm going to handle this. While it may not be in her best interests, I'm not going to interrupt her last few days with her BF. If she wants to spend them with him, that's her choice. Over the summer though, not happening. I'll try my best to get her out of the house, and away from him, as much as I can. We've already made plans to go fishing/sailing a lot, along with whatever else we can think of, and she clearly enjoys spending time with me.

Only issue is that we're both not conversationalists, so there's a lot of silence or just abrupt ends to conversations, any advice on that?

[MaverickIB]

There's nothing wrong with silence. Someone doesn't always have to be saying something.

[dmillerw]

Yeah, just feels awkward sometimes, and there's just a lot of "Yeah"s or "Right"s when we do talk. For me at least, it's simply not knowing what to say, and it's apparently the same with her.

[Nikeos]

the only time i've ever had the issue of feeling awkward or struggling to find things to say, its always been because me and that person just weren't compatible

idk, not trying to say thats the case here, just speaking from my own experiences, ive never felt like that when ive genuinely clicked with someone

[dmillerw]

I've wondered if that's the case myself honestly, I have a hard time figuring out my own feelings towards someone.

[Heigou]

[QUOTE=MaverickIB;40877936]You need to realize how you picture her is not how she is.

It's pretty damn clear she broke up with you while you were still in the heavy infatuation phase. You think she's this perfect individual who is amazing and the best person ever and yadda yadda yadda. She probably felt the same way about you once, but her infatuation died out before yours did and once she realized who you really are (not saying you're a bad person or anything) she didn't want to be with you. You just weren't her cup of tea.

If you had stayed with her long enough, your infatuation would too fade and you'd realize she isn't a perfect individual. What you are feeling isn't love, it's withdrawals. The best solution is pretty obvious, find other things to do, which is easier than you think. But like you said, you don't want to get over her. Because you have this picture of her in your head as this perfect girl. [b]She is not perfect.[/b] There are other girls out there who are just as good if not better than her. Plenty of them.

I've been down that road too many times. Tons of people have. You think the last person you were with was the best you'll ever find, sit and mope for a while, then when you finally decide to get out into the fray again, you meet someone better and feel like a fucking idiot for wasting all of that time.

It's a mind game with yourself. Your subconscious brain will tell you she's perfect and you want her back. Consciously, you need to force yourself to realize there are better people out there. People who won't ditch you the second they aren't infatuated anymore. People who will make you happier than she ever could. Your infatuation will tell you this isn't true. Infatuation [i]lies.[/i] Like any addict going through withdrawals, your mind is going to tell you whatever it can to get you to go back to whatever it was you're addicted to. It's lying. You don't need another cigarette. You don't need another drink. You don't need to be with this girl.[/QUOTE]

I have to print that shit and put it on my wall or something. That's something I realized over years of being infatuated with my oneitis but the last part rings especially true, it is a mind game with yourself and an addiction you have to get rid of.

My only problem is I live in the middle of god damned nowhere so female interaction is very low. I've taken up a few hobbies to help cope with it and shift my attention somewhere else, working out is a great thing.

[ScoutKing]

Working out has been a god send/great hobby to help me get my mind off things.
But yeah ill chim in on the whole you have to learn to not fall into the infatuation cycle. Get your heart torn a few times, or have some time with our good old friend infatuation and you'll learn quick not to do that again.

So i just watched my older "twin" brother get married.
Its a little weird because we look so similar.

[Meller Yeller]

Was going to hang out with a couple of people at the Hard Rock Casino.
Thing is, I'm only 20. To anybody who's been to one of these places, do they actually make an effort to enforce that or do they just not bother unless they see something blatantly off?

Because I'd say I look the part and the poker tables are actually 18+ so I'm sure they'd expect to see people a bit under the age to be wandering about anyways.

Goddamn I hate this age. Such an awkward state of limbo until the next year to do anything.

[RoastedSagets]

Every single person I've tried to talk other than my 2 or 3 really good friends to has stopped talking to me after like 2 days what am I doing wrong.

[RocketRacer]

[QUOTE=dmillerw;40882814]Well, I think I know how I'm going to handle this. While it may not be in her best interests, I'm not going to interrupt her last few days with her BF. If she wants to spend them with him, that's her choice. Over the summer though, not happening. I'll try my best to get her out of the house, and away from him, as much as I can. We've already made plans to go fishing/sailing a lot, along with whatever else we can think of, and she clearly enjoys spending time with me.

Only issue is that we're both not conversationalists, so there's a lot of silence or just abrupt ends to conversations, any advice on that?[/QUOTE]
Pretty much the same with me. I went out with a girl, but sometimes I had to think what to talk about. Even though the girl said she enjoyed that we went out, but sometimes we were silent and I had no idea what to talk about. I feel so awkward when this happens.

[Deathhunter]

I usually think that talking random shit that comes to your head works really well. I remember once, we talked about hobbies and common interests we have on a daily basis. Conversation started to die down and all.

Yea it was awkward but I quickly brought up some random shit like vegetables and we started talking again, stuff around food and yaddiya. I find it that 10% of what you talk about is important but 90% of passion and body language you give off in conversations is important too.

Next time try it. Just be confident about any random thing you talk about and it'll be fine.

[Endae]

This has been nagging me for a little while now and I feel like I have to ask someone about this so here goes.

I met this girl a short time ago, we talked for a bit, exchanged numbers and everything seemed swell. Following that we messaged each other and talked and I decided to take the plunge and ask her out. She said yes and we planned to meet up. Que the night before and she suddenly says something has come up and can't make it. Fair enough. Over the next week or so we talk more and made plans for another time but due to both of us at work and Uni it's been a bit problematic. So I decide to ask about dinner instead as being later it would be easier for both of us and she says it sounds good. However the nights I ask about she's typically busy and when I ask directly what nights are good for her I never get a response back. Fast forward to now and we still talk a bit but often she'll reply days later or not at all. For the most part I have, as I have had for a while, the feeling/impression that she isn't really all that interested and honestly I'd prefer if she was straight up about it and told me. So with semester breaks coming up I thought I'd give it a last try, we talked for a bit and then she just stopped replying half way through.

The feeling I get is that if left as is I'll never get a response and at this point I don't know if I should really send anything back either. Just let it be the end of it. But more then anything I just want to be frank and ask her about this and at least get an answer but It doesn't necessarily feel the right thing to do.

[Metallics]

[QUOTE=RoboWolf;40885918]This has been nagging me for a little while now and I feel like I have to ask someone about this so here goes.

I met this girl a short time ago, we talked for a bit, exchanged numbers and everything seemed swell. Following that we messaged each other and talked and I decided to take the plunge and ask her out. She said yes and we planned to meet up. Que the night before and she suddenly says something has come up and can't make it. Fair enough. Over the next week or so we talk more and made plans for another time but due to both of us at work and Uni it's been a bit problematic. So I decide to ask about dinner instead as being later it would be easier for both of us and she says it sounds good. However the nights I ask about she's typically busy and when I ask directly what nights are good for her I never get a response back. Fast forward to now and we still talk a bit but often she'll reply days later or not at all. For the most part I have, as I have had for a while, the feeling/impression that she isn't really all that interested and honestly I'd prefer if she was straight up about it and told me. So with semester breaks coming up I thought I'd give it a last try, we talked for a bit and then she just stopped replying half way through.

The feeling I get is that if left as is I'll never get a response and at this point I don't know if I should really send anything back either. Just let it be the end of it. But more then anything I just want to be frank and ask her about this and at least get an answer but It doesn't necessarily feel the right thing to do.[/QUOTE]

Don't bother, you already know the answer, move on.

[Behemoth_PT]

[QUOTE=RoboWolf;40885918]This has been nagging me for a little while now and I feel like I have to ask someone about this so here goes.

I met this girl a short time ago, we talked for a bit, exchanged numbers and everything seemed swell. Following that we messaged each other and talked and I decided to take the plunge and ask her out. She said yes and we planned to meet up. Que the night before and she suddenly says something has come up and can't make it. Fair enough. Over the next week or so we talk more and made plans for another time but due to both of us at work and Uni it's been a bit problematic. So I decide to ask about dinner instead as being later it would be easier for both of us and she says it sounds good. However the nights I ask about she's typically busy and when I ask directly what nights are good for her I never get a response back. Fast forward to now and we still talk a bit but often she'll reply days later or not at all. For the most part I have, as I have had for a while, the feeling/impression that she isn't really all that interested and honestly I'd prefer if she was straight up about it and told me. So with semester breaks coming up I thought I'd give it a last try, we talked for a bit and then she just stopped replying half way through.

The feeling I get is that if left as is I'll never get a response and at this point I don't know if I should really send anything back either. Just let it be the end of it. But more then anything I just want to be frank and ask her about this and at least get an answer but It doesn't necessarily feel the right thing to do.[/QUOTE]

Dude, don't even give it a last try. Really.

First because you will never get a direct straightforward response on what she really wants from you. You would feel pretty awkward if you did so, so don't.

Second, she's keeping you on the hook. She maybe busy but she doesn't really care that much about you to remember you asked her on a date. Would she be really interested in you she would come back to you.

Don't let yourself be that manipulated, just move on. If she's not interested in you then don't be interested in her.

You have your studies so make it your priority. Accomplishment is more important and rewarding than dates.