Super Friendly Social and Love Advice V6 - JUST FUCKING ASK HER OUT - General - Facepunch Forum

Super Friendly Social and Love Advice V6 - JUST FUCKING ASK HER OUT

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[QUOTE=Yahnich;41215494]"no it's fine really :)" "oh shit i fucked up oh shit oh god oh man"[/QUOTE] what she says: ":(" what she means: "CRAWWWWWLING IN MY SKIIIIIIIN THESE WOOOOOUNDS THEY WIIIIILL NOT HEAAAAALLLLL"

I'm simultaneously feeling confident and not confident about how well I've been cleaning up my room and talking to this girl, I think the sudden hot weather and not eating until 4:00 PM might be contributing I feel like there's something wrong when there isn't, and I just need to be patient and do my summerwork instead of stressing over this non-issue

[QUOTE=Yahnich;41217243]cleaning up your room is like the male 'body language' of saying "today i am expecting boning"[/QUOTE] If that's true then I should be drowning in pussy because it's been 3 weeks of solid work and started as a competition with this girl

[QUOTE=NoDachi;41209381]try internet dating like okcupid that got a hermit like me a girl in a couple of weeks[/QUOTE] but the girl you were talking about was crazy and wanted to carve her name in your chest where do i sign up

[QUOTE=thisispain;41217561]but the girl you were talking about was crazy and wanted to carve her name in your chest where do i sign up[/QUOTE] well I've remained uncarved so far so good

[QUOTE=Yahnich;41217398]i never said it means "i'm getting pussy tonight" i said it means "by golly if i clean my room up she'll probably jump my dick"[/QUOTE] Yeah I guess that's what it is I took pictures of the sea of shit it my room was before I started and looking back at them all of my doubt is gone

my room just smells like rat almost every girl i know likes that its pretty dope get yourself some rats

All I've got is lots of spiders

thats not the same thing tho some girls would be pretty into that find some goths

That's easier said than done, I've only ever seen ~3 goths around here My conversation with this girl is dying off I think it's time to play the "How was [last destination on trip]" card

Well Facepunch, what can I say about tonight... My ex posted on Twitter that she's glad that she came to her senses and broke up with me. When reading this I decided to go and get my stuff back from her house, she made it really awkward, but eventually I did get my stuff back, and as I did she gave me the middle finger. So I planned on cutting her out of my life, so I got home and she messaged me saying I'm a cunt and other insulting things, so I ignored the messaged for a while, and as I looked at my stuff she gave to me, I found that she put a candle in there that she meant to give me when we were together, and I looked at my phone and she said I was her best friend for a year but I ruined it. And now I've got one of her friends who wants to punch me now, and everything has just gone to shit. All I wanted was a nice civilised breakup, but all of this happens, I am so upset over it all and walking away from her has been the hardest thing ever, she called me a cunt and everything, but things like the candle and her saying I was her best friend are just pulling at my heart strings. I fucking loved her with all my heart, and now its ended up like this. What should I do guys?

[QUOTE=AltUser;41218419]Well Facepunch, what can I say about tonight... My ex posted on Twitter that she's glad that she came to her senses and broke up with me. When reading this I decided to go and get my stuff back from her house, she made it really awkward, but eventually I did get my stuff back, and as I did she gave me the middle finger. So I planned on cutting her out of my life, so I got home and she messaged me saying I'm a cunt and other insulting things, so I ignored the messaged for a while, and as I looked at my stuff she gave to me, I found that she put a candle in there that she meant to give me when we were together, and I looked at my phone and she said I was her best friend for a year but I ruined it. And now I've got one of her friends who wants to punch me now, and everything has just gone to shit. All I wanted was a nice civilised breakup, but all of this happens, I am so upset over it all and walking away from her has been the hardest thing ever, she called me a cunt and everything, but things like the candle and her saying I was her best friend are just pulling at my heart strings. I fucking loved her with all my heart, and now its ended up like this. What should I do guys?[/QUOTE] why did you break up? If you don't mind me asking.

[QUOTE=NoDachi;41218437]why did you break up? If you don't mind me asking.[/QUOTE] It's a bit complicated... Basically, we argued a lot in the end, and one night she was on holiday and wanted to tell guys she was single so they would treat her better, and I was having none of that. So I got jealous and then we broke up, to put it simple. She broke up with me, I know I had my fair share of the blame, but she's trying to make it out like I'm the bad guy, I really don't know what to do. [editline]28th June 2013[/editline] I was handling the breakup fine until now, but it's just all hit me, I really don't think I'm the bad person in all this, I mean all I wanted was my stuff back, and I get all this crap, all I wanted was for us to end on good terms.

[QUOTE=AltUser;41218419]Well Facepunch, what can I say about tonight... My ex posted on Twitter that she's glad that she came to her senses and broke up with me. When reading this I decided to go and get my stuff back from her house, she made it really awkward, but eventually I did get my stuff back, and as I did she gave me the middle finger. So I planned on cutting her out of my life, so I got home and she messaged me saying I'm a cunt and other insulting things, so I ignored the messaged for a while, and as I looked at my stuff she gave to me, I found that she put a candle in there that she meant to give me when we were together, and I looked at my phone and she said I was her best friend for a year but I ruined it. And now I've got one of her friends who wants to punch me now, and everything has just gone to shit. All I wanted was a nice civilised breakup, but all of this happens, I am so upset over it all and walking away from her has been the hardest thing ever, she called me a cunt and everything, but things like the candle and her saying I was her best friend are just pulling at my heart strings. I fucking loved her with all my heart, and now its ended up like this. What should I do guys?[/QUOTE] Ignore it, get past it. What else are you going to do? Let her hate you, let her tell her friends how much of a 'cunt' you apparently are, it won't affect you, especially not if you get past it. You'll be fine, man. Just continue moving on. This is just another down in all the ups and downs, and soon enough you'll be completely fine with it. A little longer, and you'll be over her. [QUOTE=AltUser;41218419]I fucking loved her with all my heart, and now its ended up like this. What should I do guys?[/QUOTE] I don't know how literal you were with this, but I kind of want to suggest you change the way you worded it before we repeat that conversation again :v: [editline]27th June 2013[/editline] [QUOTE=AltUser;41218505]It's a bit complicated... Basically, we argued a lot in the end, and one night she was on holiday and [B]wanted to tell guys she was single so they would treat her better[/B], and I was having none of that. So I got jealous and then we broke up, to put it simple. She broke up with me, I know I had my fair share of the blame, but she's trying to make it out like I'm the bad guy, I really don't know what to do. [editline]28th June 2013[/editline] I was handling the breakup fine until now, but it's just all hit me, I really don't think I'm the bad person in all this, I mean all I wanted was my stuff back, and I get all this crap, all I wanted was for us to end on good terms.[/QUOTE] That's terrible and stupid and you really aren't to blame at all. Just from an outside perspective, from how she seems to act and the fact that she broke up with you in the end over something like that, I'd say it might help for you to think about how good of a thing it probably is that it ended. I feel like that's a bad thing to say though, considering I don't know how it actually was. Just saying.

[QUOTE=riku2211;41218542]Ignore it, get past it. What else are you going to do? Let her hate you, let her tell her friends how much of a 'cunt' you apparently are, it won't affect you, especially not if you get past it. You'll be fine, man. Just continue moving on. This is just another down in all the ups and downs, and soon enough you'll be completely fine with it. A little longer, and you'll be over her. I don't know how literal you were with this, but I kind of want to suggest you change the way you worded it before we repeat that conversation again :v:[/QUOTE] I know, it's just shit right now. And what I meant is when we were together I loved her so much, and now its all boiled down to this. I don't want to be with her, I know that for definite. But its so damn hard right now, how someone you loved can now be like this to you, its not fair. [editline]28th June 2013[/editline] Hey thanks man, it really has been hard with all this, but you in particular have helped me through it. Thanks to everyone really, its been a massive help to be able to share all this with people.

[QUOTE=AltUser;41218505]It's a bit complicated... Basically, we argued a lot in the end, and one night she was on holiday and wanted to tell guys she was single so they would treat her better, and I was having none of that. So I got jealous and then we broke up, to put it simple. She broke up with me, I know I had my fair share of the blame, but she's trying to make it out like I'm the bad guy, I really don't know what to do. [editline]28th June 2013[/editline] I was handling the breakup fine until now, but it's just all hit me, I really don't think I'm the bad person in all this, I mean all I wanted was my stuff back, and I get all this crap, all I wanted was for us to end on good terms.[/QUOTE] A comforting thought is that if this even happened, then you were not meant to be. I remember when I was in the same emotional state as you and that was the last thing I wanted to hear. I know it's hard to just stop the flow of emotions but one thing which have worked for me is thinking that she is a lost cause anyway. I'm powerless to change the course of our "love" or old relationship, and therefore I should not fight for it or dwell on it. And for my issue. The thoughts of my ex are getting gradually less intense! I'm happy that my emotions are getting them selves together after all this time. One thing which have been bothering me lately is the feeling that I [I]must[/I] have a girlfriend. I'm fully aware that I don't need one to be happy but I still feel that way. On an unrelated note, how are things holding up for you riku? :v:

[QUOTE=PredGD;41219272]A comforting thought is that if this even happened, then you were not meant to be. I remember when I was in the same emotional state as you and that was the thing last thing I wanted to know. I know it's hard to just stop the flow of emotions but one thing which have worked for me is thinking that she is a lost cause anyway. I'm powerless to change the course of our "love" or old relationship, and therefore I should not fight for it or dwell on it. And for my issue. The thoughts of my ex are getting gradually less intense! I'm happy that my emotions are getting them selves together after all this time. One thing which have been bothering me lately is the feeling that I [I]must[/I] have a girlfriend. I'm fully aware that I don't need one to be happy but I still feel that way. On an unrelated note, how are things holding up for you riku? :v:[/QUOTE] Good actually. That emotional slamming everyone gave out over the infatuation thing actually helped a lot (coulda been a bit less harsh though). I just decided to stop posting considering I was so unsure of my emotions. I feel better than I have in a long time and I honestly don't feel so unwilling or unable to move on anymore. I still find myself thinking about her sometimes, though. She's actually been in a lot of my dreams lately. Good part about that, though, is that when I wake up I'm not all depressed about it. Doesn't really help still. Things have been better between my mom and I, too, so that's cool. All in all, things are good. Thanks for asking :v:. My only real problem is boredom. Summer sucks. Still no luck finding a job, either. I'd be a lot better off with more things to occupy my time.

[QUOTE=riku2211;41219433] My only real problem is boredom. Summer sucks. Still no luck finding a job, either. I'd be a lot better off with more things to occupy my time.[/QUOTE] I heard that. I've applied to 7-8 places and only one of them told me they weren't hiring. Lucky, huh? Tomorrow a place by me is having open interviews, so I'm going to show up and hopefully they'll get back to me. So, the girl I'm currently trying to eventually go out with is pretty much done with her current relationship. Shots were fired between them, don't know what they are in a technical sense. She's in kind of a depressed state, but me and my friends have been trying to cheer her up by hanging out with her as a group, etc. I want to give her time and stuff to heal, but she's been saying stuff like "I'm afraid no one will like me again." Opportunities keep popping up but I don't feel like the timing is right to say anything yet, and it's really frustrating to see her like this. However, I'm afraid that I'll just emotionally distress her even further and make matters worse. Never been in a situation like this.

How do you guys act upon infatuations?

[QUOTE=Goldenmyer;41191659]I started talking to an old female friend a few days after we split and when we finally got a chance to hang out last week and the whole time we were holding hand and sitting on each others laps and stuff. She's the exact type of girl I like and we have perfect chemistry too, we almost kissed at the end of the night but I chose not to because I wanted to save it for the next time when we had more alone time. We have a movie date tomorrow (today?) at my house so I'm probably gonna go for it then. She's a good friend to my ex and is afraid that my ex will hate her because she and I are thinking about being more then just friends. I'm going to a new college in the fall so I'll be okay with whatever happens but I would REALLY like if we became something. I enjoy talking to her more then I did my ex when we were dating.[/QUOTE] Oh yeah, I have an update to this. We had our movie date on Wednesday and it was pretty awesome. We watched my favorite movie "Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist" and a few others. Our chemistry is still on point and my family seems to like her so that's a major plus. The first thing my mom noted was just how pretty she is. She was at my house for a huge part of the day and we made out a lot. I was genuinely bummed that she had to actually go home. This movie date made me actually feel like I was in a relationship. The relationship with my ex just seemed like exclusive friends with benefits, we had a good amount of things in common but we were just completely opposite personality wise. I honestly don't miss my ex or our relationship at all. On a different note, what's up with biting? The girl likes to bite me a lot, she's bit my shoulder, nipple, back, and nose. I'm cool with it and all but I'm just curious about it, a different girl bit me during my sophomore year and it left a bite mark that lasted like 2 months. I have no problems with biting because I'm open minded and willing to try a lot of stuff but, I'd prefer to not have bite marks on my body again.

[QUOTE=CabooseRvB;41221750]How do you guys act upon infatuations?[/QUOTE] Follow up on them and see where it goes. It's a hit or miss kind of thing. Live and learn, etc.

[QUOTE=PistolKid;41222060]Follow up on them and see where it goes. It's a hit or miss kind of thing. Live and learn, etc.[/QUOTE] Sounds good, there is this girl that I befriended but not into that 'zone' yet you know? Close friends of mine know about it and the advice I've been getting is 'give it time.' The only thing is that we haven't been together often or sort of have 'bonding' time together so to speak. Just how do you go about asking this girl out when you're in that sort of standing? Is it out of the blue? Is it awkward that I chose her before my other friends?

I'm going to address this in points, based off of my personal experience. [QUOTE=CabooseRvB;41222174] [B]A:[/B]The only thing is that we haven't been together often or sort of have 'bonding' time together so to speak. [B]B:[/B]Just how do you go about asking this girl out when you're in that sort of standing? [B]C:[/B]Is it out of the blue? [B]D:[/B]Is it awkward that I chose her before my other friends?[/QUOTE] A: You might want to jump on that. Every time I've gone out with a girl I've done a "try before you buy" type deal where you essentially go on dates before getting "serious." Things I've done include going to the park, going to school dances (if possible), small stuff like that. Try talking to her and interacting with her more with a group of friends around, text her, etc. Make sure that you actually want to follow through with it. (Most of the time you do, but you might notice something you didn't before.) B: Just ask her if she would like to go out with you or something along those lines. (I don't recommend doing what I did, mentioned previously in the thread. That was a one time deal sorta thing.) The wording is hard to get right and it's usually kind of awkward (for me) but make the message clear. C: Depends. If you don't follow through with trying to get to know her better and talk to her more, it will be. Your chances of actually succeeding are a lot lower if you don't make an attempt to get closer to her. It's also a good way of getting an idea of how she feels about you. D: No. Or, it shouldn't be. I've dated girls that are close friends with my other female friends, it's not a problem. Just be prepared to face the fact that if you do have a relationship with her, it may end not so well and you'll lose that friend you once had. Tbh, I'm worried that my previous relationships might cause my next potential girl to have a problem with actually going out with me. But our friendship is good, and I still have others in the same group as my ex who is in that group. (We don't talk to each other any more. It's for the best.)

I'm in a similar situation and I'm just planning on going the "flirt and spend time with" route

[QUOTE=Yahnich;41226559]i just came to the realization i'm deeply unhappy[/QUOTE] Why, you aren't currently being or doing what you feel you should be?

[QUOTE=Yahnich;41226581]i just am i really don't feel like explaining more, it's more of a venting thing[/QUOTE] i love you yahnich everything will be okay

So girl I'm interested in and I managed to keep a conversation going for a good few hours last night, which is usually quite difficult for me to do. :) Also had her read a text where a friend mentioned I liked her (had other stuff in it to, relevant to what we were talking about) and she got a big smile on her face. I'd say it was related to something else in the text, but there wasn't really anything else to smile about, so I'm curious.

One more week until I can talk to this girl normally, I'm just hoping that I can at some point before that I can get into at least a small conversation and get in some light flirting and mentioning hanging out but oh my god trying to stay patient is impossible

[QUOTE=Yahnich;41226581]i just am i really don't feel like explaining more, it's more of a venting thing[/QUOTE] I came to same realization a couple days ago, I realized I was being a cunt on dota 2 because of how shitty everything has become after I failed university. Its not a good realization. It sounds childish I know but its really become the only way I vent out my anger at how my life is spiraling into shit.

So yesterday I decided to talk on facebook to a girl I know and to whom I had a crush on in like years and is now studying abroad. So basically since I was up studying all night I noticed she was online too and decided to start a conversation with her. Looks like we were having the same struggles with finals and all and she told me she was coming back to continue her studies here. Which was basically great news since she then showed some interest in having lunch together occasionally next semester and we arranged to meet again in late August. Jeez, we even play the same videogames and had like a long conversation about our conquests and achievements in Crusader Kings 2. so yeah, I'm excited. She's a very nice person, kind and all and I only manage to see her like once a year, so it will be great seeing her more often after class.

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