Facepunch Anonymous Confessional v7 - General

[QUOTE=WastedJamacan;32838428]Don't worry man, only having one testicle doesn't do much to you at all, although I can imagine losing it after having it for years is quite a bit different than losing it at birth. I had testicular torsion at birth, and I've lived my whole life with one testicle. I just have to be extra careful during sports.[/QUOTE] Same here, haven't had a single problem.

[QUOTE=Satane;32846928]I seriously doubt that's a real story. First you get beaten to shit by pedro, lose a testicle. And then you fight again and chop 2 of his fingers off ??[/QUOTE] Apparently little-known fact: knives tend to cut things, there's statistical evidence supporting it. Edit: [QUOTE]I'M SORRY IF I TYPE THIS IN ALL CAPS BUT MY CAPS KEY IS BROKEN SO I HAVE TO TYPE LIKE THIS. WHEN I WAS 14 (IM 16 NOW) THERE WAS THIS GUY AT MY SCHOOL WHO WAS THE GENERIC IN-CLOSET HOMOSEXUAL GOTH (SHIT WAS FREAKY MAN) WHO WOULD WALK UP TO ME AND TELL ME ABOUT HIS DREAM OF ME ON THE STREET WITH SHRUNKEN HEADS, I HAD BROKEN LEGS AND BODY PARTS ON THE CONCRETE AND ABOUT HOW HE WOULD IMAGINE CUTTING PEOPLE UP WITH BUTCHER KNIFES, THIS MOTHERFUCKER WAS CRAZY AND SCARY. HE TOLD ME HE WOULD CUT HIMSELF AND DRINK THE BLOOD LIKE A VAMPIRE, HE TOLD ME HE WAS A BAT AND TOLD ME AT NIGHT TO GET OUTTA SIGHT AND ALSO TALKED ABOUT VOODOO, I'M GLAD TO GET THIS OFF MY CHEST AND THANK YOU FOR(HOPEFULLY) READING[/QUOTE] Don't worry, it's apparently fairly common to have a single batshit insane friend; once, someone I knew told me he was an alien and that if I met him at school at twelve o'clock he'd show me his space-ship and take me to Mars. He later flipped the fuck out and tried to chew my face during lunch. True story.

[QUOTE]Ok. Second confession. This one is happened about 6 or 7 years ago. This was when I was still in primary school. It was year 6th and every year 6th class got the chance to become a "Buddy". Now what a buddy is looking after the little kids, making sure they're safe, access into normally restricted places. Stuff like that. They would pull you out about 10 minutes before lunch time to help prepare the little kids food. But all the buddy's had one designated child. These weren't any special kids, just kids who were new, had trouble making friends, stuff like that. Now after about 2 days of just generally cleaning up and looking after my friend I decided to help out with my friends buddy. I knew her name was Charlie but hadn't seen her. Anyway, I'm looking for my friend and he tells me to look after her while going to clean himself up (He had food literally on his clothes because of the kids) I'm shouting her name out until on the adults point her out for me. Then I see her, beautiful long blonde hair, cute green eyes, crinkle cut noise. Perfection. After seeing her I got a raging boner, at first I was confused what was happening then about 10 minutes I realised why. I had a thing for small kids. Now, I was only about 12 but I was smart. I knew I couldn't let this affect me because hell, I didn't want to sign the sex offender list and I didn't want to go to jail. Anyway I lift her up and her ass graze my penis and it get's stiff. I knew this was wrong and it sickens me to this day . I went to the males bathroom, got her in a stall and locked the door and I unzipped my pants. I gave her simple instructions on how to jerk me off and she complied. It felt amazing. At this point I didn't care for anything except that. After she'd finished I took off all her clothes and just felt her up. It felt so good. I had her under my control. After some very heavy petting I finished off and got her dressed. I felt like shit. I wanted to commit suicide after that. Now it hits 3:30 and I'm out of there like the fucking flash. But I see her walking with her dad and I just felt so bad. I didn't go home. I went to church and prayed. I prayed and told him everything that happened. It's 5 - 6 years later. I've stopped going but I still feel like absolute shit when I think about it.[/QUOTE] [QUOTE]So, I basically just confessed all of this to one of my best friends because I couldn't keep it to myself any more, so I thought let's tell facepunch. Basically, when I was a young little rascal, I had this cousin of mine that I thought was really cool, he's more or less two years older than me. Anyway, this cousin and I pretty much did everything together until I guess his hormones started kicking. He was around 13 and I was 11. He raped me. He abused me. But, I still really liked him and it was our little secret and that shit, so I've never told this to anyone. He took advantage of me for like a year, although not too often I suppose. Eventually I guess he realized he was doing something bad so he stopped and we pretty much never spoke again. Every family reunion that has us occupying a nearby place leaves us really awkward, avoiding eye contact and sitting as far away from each other as possible. This as a side effect means I have a complete detachment from people. Something in my subconsciousness keeps telling me not to trust anyone because they'll just betray me. So because of that I can't keep a relationship for longer than four months, if I even manage to get involved with someone. Usually, I just stay away from every female unless I'm drunk and even if I'm drunk it stays a one night stand. I feel no desire to be with anyone at all. A woman's or a man's touch means nothing to me. Yet I know I am not asexual, because I do get horny thoughts and pop random boners, as does porn arouse me. I think this is because porn won't 'betray' me, there's no love or trust attached. My social detachment is not only because of my nephew mind you. When I was younger and pretty much just hit high school, so like two to three years after the abuse I was pretty fat. Like blue whale, but more like gray whale. Kids are vicious, vicious things. For over three year, from the start of second to the end of my fourth year in highschool, I was mocked by so many people. I pretty much couldn't walk past anyone without being laughed at. As a result of this, I started living in a cocoon, to block out EVERYONE. I scratched myself to feel something, anything. I wasn't proud of the act, but it made me feel alive. It moved my thoughts away from more... Self-destructive thoughts. Even now that I have good friends, I still find it hard to trust people. I have this constant nagging feeling they hate me behind my back, but they just don't have the nerve to tell me. That everyone just wishes I'd die and be gone. Basically, every day I live is social agony. To not be a social pariah I have to try to keep relationships and friends, but those are the things that pain me the most, no matter what I try. Thank you facepunch. - Loveless[/QUOTE] [QUOTE]I'm not sure quite how to say this, so I'll just come out and say it. Whenever I climax (during masturbation) instead of just letting it go, I bend over and cum into my mouth. Then shallow it. I've been doing this for about two years now. Its not a fetish or anything like that, I don't get my kicks out of doing it, it's more out of necessity then anything else. As I live in a three bedroom house with my brother, sister, mother and father (I'm sixteen), and don't want to leave behind any "evidence" so to speak of the act, like tissue used to clean up afterwards. Nobody has figured out I masturbate yet, so I guess its working for me. But my question to you, facepunch, is this: Is it healthy to do this? Could I get sick from swallowing my own semen? Thanks in advance.[/QUOTE] lmgtfy? nope.

Sperm isn't bad for you, actually it gives you a good protein shot. Aside from it being kinda gross (unless you're into that sort of thing), it's not a bad habit.

[QUOTE=WastedJamacan;32822346]Here's the deal bud. I used to be like this. You have to fucking get over your shit though. I'm not kidding, I moped and worried and acted all depressed, and then I realized, I'm in control of myself. Not what mistakes I make, I can change according to my mistakes. So I grew a pair and asked someone out, and, sure enough, we were together for 16 months before we broke up this past Friday. I didn't have a girlfriend until I was about 17, in the summer before senior year. It happens. But you can do it. You can get over yourself, you can man up, and you can make yourself a better person. I know you can, especially if I was capable of doing it.[/QUOTE] If there are any homos in the thread, can you tell me if this technique works on men too?

[QUOTE=Raijin;32850754]If there are any homos in the thread, can you tell me if this technique works on men too?[/QUOTE] NEED this info also!

[QUOTE=Raijin;32850754]If there are any homos in the thread, can you tell me if this technique works on men too?[/QUOTE] i mean i'm not gay but it stands to reason that if you make a concerted effort put on a happy face, get your shit together, and put yourself out there more, chances are your life will improve. pretty sure that also applies to homos, butt i can't say for sure.

[QUOTE]Nobody has figured out I masturbate yet, so I guess its working for me.[/QUOTE] You must be incredibly naive then. Your parents already know that you fap. EVERYBODY'S parents know that their son faps.

I'd like to make a confession that concerns all of facepuch. Garry loves dicks true story. [highlight](User was banned for this post ("Trolling" - Starpluck))[/highlight]

An 05'er? I'm dissappointed.

[QUOTE=myalt22;32856911]You must be incredibly naive then. Your parents already know that you fap. EVERYBODY'S parents know that their son faps.[/QUOTE]i don't want to believe

[QUOTE=myalt22;32856911]You must be incredibly naive then. Your parents already know that you fap. EVERYBODY'S parents know that their son faps.[/QUOTE] Not my parents. They're very devout conservative Christians who would probably take my laptop away for a month if they caught me masturbating. I don't think that they know.

[QUOTE=myalt22;32856911]You must be incredibly naive then. Your parents already know that you fap. EVERYBODY'S parents know that their son faps.[/QUOTE] I bet they're concerned about their son who's apparently not masturbating. Or batshit insane religious people.

[QUOTE=JumJum;32858786]Not my parents. They're very devout conservative Christians who would probably take my laptop away for a month if they caught me masturbating. I don't think that they know.[/QUOTE] I bet your father knows because he was probably the same when he was your age and then if he confronts you with that argument people will know he masturbates.

What's with all the paedos in this thread? I'm not sure I feel safe on this forum anymore.

[QUOTE=Raijin;32850754]If there are any homos in the thread, can you tell me if this technique works on men too?[/QUOTE] It's not a technique, it's called getting over yourself. It'd probably be smarter in our case to actually find out if the intended person is bi/gay as well, but really, how else do you ask someone out besides getting over your inflated issues and asking someone out already.

[QUOTE=Slowbro;32860100]What's with all the paedos in this thread? I'm not sure I feel safe on this forum anymore.[/QUOTE] Your neighbor might also be a pedo. Or even your own parents. Think about it.

[QUOTE=Slowbro;32860100]What's with all the paedos in this thread? I'm not sure I feel safe on this forum anymore.[/QUOTE] Pedophile =/= child porn watcher

[QUOTE=Mister Sandman;32860237]Pedophile =/= child porn watcher[/QUOTE] Paedophile = person who takes innocent young child into bathroom and tells them to jack him off

[quote] I'm not sure quite how to say this, so I'll just come out and say it. Whenever I climax (during masturbation) instead of just letting it go, I bend over and cum into my mouth. Then shallow it. I've been doing this for about two years now. Its not a fetish or anything like that, I don't get my kicks out of doing it, it's more out of necessity then anything else. As I live in a three bedroom house with my brother, sister, mother and father (I'm sixteen), and don't want to leave behind any "evidence" so to speak of the act, like tissue used to clean up afterwards. Nobody has figured out I masturbate yet, so I guess its working for me. But my question to you, facepunch, is this: Is it healthy to do this? Could I get sick from swallowing my own semen? Thanks in advance.[/quote] It's not hard to google. [quote]Semen ingestion Some reasons for human ingestion of human or other semen are erotic gratification and physical and spiritual benefits. Nutritional value Semen is primarily water, but contains trace amounts of almost every nutrient the human body uses.[citation needed] It has somewhat higher amounts of commonly deficient minerals, such as potassium, magnesium, and selenium.[42] One typical ejaculation contains 150 mg of protein, 11 mg of carbohydrates, 6 mg fat, 3 mg cholesterol, 7% US RDA potassium and 3% US RDA copper and zinc.[43][not in citation given] When metabolized, protein yields 4 kcal/g, carbohydrate also yields 4 kcal/g, and fat yields 9 kcal/g.[44] Hence the food energy in the typical ejaculation is 0.7 kcal (2.9 kJ). Health risks There is no risk in ingesting the semen of a healthy man. Swallowing semen carries no additional risk other than those inherent in fellatio. Fellatio does carry some transmission risk for sexually transmitted diseases such as HIV or herpes, especially for people with bleeding gums, gingivitis or open sores.[45] Even if semen is cold before the individual ingests it, viruses can stay active for a long period of time once outside the body. Research has suggested that performing unprotected oral sex on a person infected with human papillomavirus (HPV) might increase the risk of oral or throat cancer. The study found that 36% of the cancer patients had HPV compared to only 1% of the healthy control group. It is believed that this is due to the transmission of HPV because this virus has been implicated in the majority of cervical cancers.[46] [/quote]

Reading these in class is a horrible idea

[QUOTE=GameDev;32860537]Reading these in class is a horrible idea[/QUOTE] And why is that?

[QUOTE=Slowbro;32860100]What's with all the paedos in this thread? I'm not sure I feel safe on this forum anymore.[/QUOTE] I'm pretty sure (aka hopeful) that people make up the most depraved shit they can think of in the hopes of getting attention.

[QUOTE=GameDev;32860537]Reading these in class is a horrible idea[/QUOTE] I was going to do an update in class, once. I decided against it. Bad idea.

That pedo story is quite sick.

[QUOTE=Slowbro;32860100]What's with all the paedos in this thread? I'm not sure I feel safe on this forum anymore.[/QUOTE] If you didn't admit you were 12 you would have been safe.

[QUOTE=imasillypiggy;32865032]If you didn't admit you were 12 you would have been safe.[/QUOTE] Hahaha, I'm not. Just pointing out this forum is a lot more messed up than I thought it was.

OP, hurry up.

I *twitch* need my fix, man!

Next batch when?