Facepunch Anonymous Confessional v7 - General

I almost feel sorry for him... almost.

I thought it was literally a gorilla until halfway through the story...

Why did the OP edit my submission? :tinfoil:

maverick if you're reading this right now i require more of your wacky antics

post more op

I bet a fatty broke Maverick's heart. That's why he hates so much on fatties.

[QUOTE=Quark:;32548644]Why did the OP edit my submission? :tinfoil:[/QUOTE] Facepunch [B]Anonymous[/B] Confessional v7

[QUOTE]So I'm pretty bored and I got into this thread by clicking randomly around Facepunch. And I thought, is there anything I want to say? Not really, my life is pretty average right now. What embarassing things can I say that are worse than what was already posted? Then it hit me This confessional isn't like any other one, at least from what I read. So here it goes. After reading this you may think I'm crazy or I'm high, but I'm being completely serious. Ever since I can remember, there's always something bothering me when i think about it. And it's not something that I can talk to other people (happening now) about it, because I am not sure if other people have the same thing. It's not a problem, it's not a medical condition, or at least known. It's something much deeper that has never been discussed before. What it is is pretty simply this: I can see. And now you're probably thinking, well so what? But no, it's different. Like, it's like I am a person and the rest of the world are other people, it's like I am the main character from Cloverfield and you are the other actors. Not in a egocentric way, just a way to describe this. Like, what you see in a first person shooting game, it's what I see in real life, everywhere, 24/7. It's like I am a camera for some superior being or something. Not talking about God or aliens or anything, because I don't know. I am not some kind of prophet or anything, I am not even religious, but what I feel is simply what I described. There's probably too much bullshit that I've written. But I can't explain this, it's something too complicated for me to explain and probably something you guys wouldn't ever think of or have ever thought of. But when I think about it, I start thinking about the meaning of life, and I feel a huge emptiness in me. So there it is.[/QUOTE] I think you are the reincarnation of Jesus. [QUOTE]Currently I am going through a stage where I am questioning my sexuality. I one thing I was sure on in the past is that I didn't find guys attractive, but then I saw an image of this specific facepuncher. Who is now making me question everything about myself and my sexuality, do I even like girls? do i like both girls and boys? Is this guy just a one off? The person I am currently lusting for shall not be named, the only information I may give is that he is 15 years old. Which in return makes this seem even more messed up than it already was. Every day I go to school and look around at my friends fantasying about whether I find them attractive or not, and to do this I imagine me fucking them. Or them fucking me. It's really making me picture my friends differently. I'm getting more distant and lonely from them everyday. I had a friend in the school who I know who is a open Bi himself. I told him about my Bi-Curiosity. For some reason I get the impression he wants to go out with me as he is constantly now chatting to me and even installed steam and added me on it. Just to talk to me. I can't seem to stop lusting and fantasizing about this facepuncher every day. I'm unsure what to do. There will be one other facepuncher who I talk to regularly reading this and will know my real account and identity. I would appreciate it if he didn't say anything [/QUOTE] I hope that facepuncher is not me. [QUOTE]This might not be hugely strange compared to some of the stories you get, but I thought I might tell you about my somewhat odd usage of Omegle. As I'm sure many of you know, Omegle is filled with horny guys looking for horny girls to have sex chats with. As such, it will come as no surprise to you that the demand for these girls far outstrips the supply, and so I, a bisexual male with little interest in conventional porn, find myself in an interesting position. Essentially, when asked what my 'asl' is, I answer as if I were a girl, and present myself as willing to partake in whichever sexual fantasies they require. Pretending to be a woman is fairly easy as most of these guys are fairly desperate and inexperienced; they're easily convinced with a picture off Google images re-uploaded to a different website. I'm not really sure why I enjoy this so much, it's definitely not because they are particularly good at expressing themselves; the lion's share of the work is almost invariably put in by your's truly. Perhaps I secretly want to be a woman, though this isn't really something that crosses my mind on a regular basis, and I think I am fairly confident in my gender, if not my appearance. It could even be the knowledge that I'm helping someone else out there express their desires in blissful ignorance of who they are really interacting with. If anyone else wants to put forward any speculation on my motivations, I'd appreciate it.[/QUOTE] Girl stands for guy in real life. [QUOTE]OK, first off this isn't going to be funny, at all. In fact it might make you feel bad. And second this isn't exactly a confession since a lot of people already know it, but it just feels good for me to tell others. My dad was very bipolar, one week he would be all happy and kind of a jerk, the next he would be sad and nervous about everything. I was the only thing keeping him around. He hated my mom for whatever reason, and my sister wasn't even his daughter. One day he threatened my mom that he would take me with him out of the states. When he got home my sister tried stopping him and he punched her in the face. I didn't know what the fuck was going on cause I was only 6. He took me to his car and we drove off to the park, a place where we went every week. After that it's all kind of a blur to me but I was told the police arrived and he didn't resist them. He wasn't sent to jail or anything and instead went to Florida where his parents were. Fast forwards about 2 years and my mom tells me he is driving his way to are house all the way in Washington. Now he isn't supposed to be doing this as part of some agreement he made with my mom, in fact he tied up his dad and drugged his mom and stole there car. All we could really do was wait for him to arrive since the police had no idea where he was. In about 2 weeks he appeared on the lawn of the house across the street looking into are windows. He didn't do anything other then that and was arrested and this time sent to rehab for 1 year. He would send letters to me every few days often containing money because he thought my mom abused me and never bought me stuff. I don't really remember what I felt about it but I ended up not replying to him. His last letter sent to me went something along the lines of this,"I really wish you would respond to me, these letters are the only thing I have to look forward too. But I think I understand why you don't want to reply. This is the last the one I will send, I love you." It contained 120$. I felt bad, really bad. To the point that this was the beginning of my 6 years of depression. When I entered 6th grade it was just like elementary, I did good in everything expect math. But then around a month later I just stopped. I refused to do anything in school, and caused a lot of trouble for the teachers. The only thing keeping me from getting myself expelled was my mom, who's life I made very hard. Every day was the same, I would pick fights with the teachers and be as bad as I could get before going to far. I finished that year with an F in every class. I only continued on to 7th grade because my mom made a plan with the school to put me into special ed. Even though they tried very hard to make it easy on me it still didn't work, except for one class who's teacher my mom personally knew since I was a baby. Maybe it was that fact I had acted good in her class or it was because she knew exactly how to deal with me. She did have the best teacher in the USA award after all. That year I finished with all F's expect one A. Next year was similar, there was one teacher I ended up liking. He was just cool, and he actually reminded me of myself sometimes. He ran two classes, both of which I was in. I finished that year with all F's expect two A's. I wish I could say it got better but it didn't. During summer break I tried committing suicide by suffocating myself with a bag. My tie around it became loose and I only passed out. Then summer ended and I went to high school; I lasted for 3 days before I told my mom I couldn't do it anymore and dropped out. The days went by when the only things I ever did was wake up, play games, eat, and go to sleep. That was my life for around a year before I contemplated suicide again. It was 3 in the morning when I held a knife to my throat desperately trying to get myself to do it. But I couldn't do it only because I had one thing I held onto and that was my mom. She was always trying to make me happy, and whenever I asked for something she would get it. I told her about that night and she just cried for about an hour. She brought me to a hospital not really knowing what else to do. I ended up with a therapist whom I have been seeing for about 3 years now. After the first year he managed to get me out of depression and since then I have been dealing with the habits I picked up from it like doing absolutely nothing all day. I'm 16 now, almost 17, and still struggling to wake up at 10 am every day and make breakfast. I mean I can barely tie my shoes for fucks sake. But it's getting better, and I can feel the progress. Currently, I am thinking about meeting my dad again for the first time in 11 years[/QUOTE] I believe in you. You can make your life awesome. [QUOTE]So I've sent this story in a grand total of fifteen times, from various anonymous emailers but it apparently it never got sent correctly. I haven't posted in the thread about but w/e So when I was 6, I had a bestest friend in the whole wide world. We were six, (both guys) said stupid shit like we wanted to get married. We had a lot of sleepovers, one time (keep in mind through out this, I didn't mean any of this in a sexual way(I was 6) but apparently he was more mature than I did and followed his instincts and or some shit) I let him sleep with me in my bed. I took my shirt off because I was hot, and fell asleep, woke up to him playing with my nipples. I didn't really know what was going on so I went back to sleep (I don't know if he did anything else that night). It was also common for us to take baths together (We normally stayed on separate sides of the bathtub) and one time he decided to come over to my side and play with the my bath toys. While he was over here, he discreetly slid his hand on to my penis and jerked me off a bit, and I got kind of disturbed by it. Later that night, he jumped into my bed (without my consent) and attempted to fuck me anally. I made a fuss, and his parents came home to collect him. He never slept over again, and neither of our parents know anything. At around 8, we started to drift apart, and by 10 we hated each other. 2 years ago, he attempted to kill me by strangulation. I didn't think he actually meant it at the time, but now that I think about it he actually tried to kill me that day. This really messed me up, it gave some gay behaviors. I was obsessed with hugging everyone I could find for example, and liked to touch people(not sexually, I just liked touching people's skin). I grew out of all of it though. Today, I am for sure straight, and he is 'straight', he says he is straight but he does a lot of questionable things that he hasn't grown out of.[/QUOTE] That's actually really scary. And now after the gorilla stories: [QUOTE]Greetings, I'm fairly normal in most respect I suppose. I'm 17, never had a girl friend or anything like that, I spend most of my time on the internet and playing games, but its not like I'm ugly or anything, however I really don't know why I've never been in a relationship, my only answer might be that I'm shy. Anyway this has nothing to do with the story which I will get to now. Recently I've had this absurd idea that it might be different and perhaps fun to partake in intercourse with my couch. Now that I think about it, it sounds horrible, but at the time, I must admit, it felt awesome. I don't really know where I got the idea from or why I decided to try it out, but I went ahead and did it. That's the story, no incest or anything, I just fucked my couch... [/QUOTE] Thats' right. [QUOTE]Hey Facepunch. Here goes nothing. > you know that thing little kids get called worms. Where they don't wash their hands after shitting a few times and end up with little parasites in their stomach that make your asshole itch like a mother fucker. It's not dangerous or anything. Just annoying as fuck. Well anyway i've had that for 4 years. Got it when 4 years ago when I got a little unhygienic. I was too embarrassed to tell my parents to get some medicine. Getting older and older it just gets more embarrassing. It's not that bad really, but every few months for a week or so my ass itches so bad to the point where I can't get to sleep and I tear my ass up. > When I was younger I was so addicted to masturbating that I would do it every night...Even during sleep overs. When I would be on the bottom bunk and my friend on the top bunk on my bunk bed, i'd wait until they fell asleep just so I could masturbate. One time my friend heard me. It was awkward. > One time a few years ago, I was staying at my cousins house. They were a boy and a girl. The girl was out for the night so I slept in her room. I raided her draw for bras and masturbated. Not because I was attracted to her, but because I barely interacted with girls at this point and the thought of holding an actual bra turned me on.[/QUOTE] [QUOTE]when i was 14 i tried on my sister's panties and fapped in them, she eventually found out and yelled at me, I've done the same routine with every girl i've dated[/QUOTE] Another story from gorilla man [QUOTE]I'm not a big fan of white girls. Light skin in general just looks terribad to me, I don't want to see veins and shit under a girl's skin. I'll bend the rules for white girls who earned themselves a decent tan, but pale ones are a big no-no. This is a story about how I got so drunk, I had sex with a white girl while everyone watched (without me knowing.) Some cats were throwing a video game/drinking party at their apartment my... freshman year I think. Freshman and sophomore years have kinda blended together for me, the only way I can tell time is by thinking about who my roommate was. I had a different roommate for each of my first 4 semesters of college because each one was batshit crazy in their own way. I'm a normal human being compared to the characters I had to live with. But I digress, back to the story. Simply put, the people at the party were lame (nerdes) but holy fuck they had a lot of alcohol. I got really fucking drunk. I'd say out of all the times I've been drunk, this time was in the top three in terms of the drunkest I've ever been in my life. That's what happens when a party has jello shots, all kinds of beer, a bartender guy who made awesome mixed shots with whipped cream on them, and eventually people started playing the "This is lame so let's take shots of everclear," game. Once I get to a certain level of inebriation, I bust out my phone and text every female I can find on my contacts list. I don't fully understand why I do this, even now when I have what could be considered a girlfriend (we do all the stuff couples do but have never talked about it "officially" or anything so I have no clue what the fuck is going on haha) who gives me all the sexy time I want when drunk, I still bust out my phone and text girls. Not necessarily to invite them over or anything, just to talk and flirt in general without any real purpose. Well this time, I managed to text white girl and tell her I was getting tanked at a party. She pretty much invited herself, and 15 minutes later, she was there. Having zero interest in white girls, I told my friend she's fair play and he went over to her trying to work his game. For some stupid reason, she insisted on blowing him off and giving me attention. My friend is a Greek dude and nicer/more attractive than me, this girl has to be borderline retarded. By this time I couldn't even sit up straight, I was gangsta leaning in a chair, propped up against the wall. You know the scene in Inception when they're at the bar and it's shifting gravity and shit? That's what I felt like the room was doing. Like I said, I had zero interest in this girl the entire time but she just wouldn't leave me alone. I felt bad for my friend since it was kinda like I was stealing her even though I wasn't trying to. I tried grab her and yell "SUCK HIS DICK INSTEAD, IT'S BEEN IN LESS DIRTY MEXICAN VAGINAS," but it came out as "Heeeeng uummmph uhhhhhhhg bleeeeeh." My face was completely numb, I could not speak. She thought I told her a joke and laughed like a hyena. God dammit. A different friend who drove our crew there was fixing to go back, so I gladly hopped (okay, more like fell) into his car and rode off into the sunset away from psycho ghost lady. Got back to the dorms and suddenly this huge wave of "I need to stick my dick in something," hit me. I no longer cared what skin color it was or what it looked like in general. Looks like psycho ghost lady was going to get a booty call. Since I have perfect texting grammar while drunk (an acquired skill), I opted to booty text instead, but she wasn't going to have any of that. The dumb bitch called me even though my face had already closed up for the night and wasn't at operational status. Then the woman wanted me to go to her dorms. God dammit, the shit I put up with just to get a nut off. Except I walk nearly a mile to the dorms only for her drunk ass to tell me "lol im actually not at that dorm im at a different one on the other side of campus." No pussy is worth that kind of work. So I told her fuck that, she's coming to my dorm if she wants my package inside of her. Turning the tables is always one of the things I like to do, I always do it in job interviews. It starts off with you convincing them to hire me, but ends up with them trying to convince me to take the job. I'm a clever girl. Apparently she was super desperate and ended up stumbling over to my place. In fact, she couldn't even walk on her own, she had a friend carrying her the whole way. I had to go outside and swap places with the friend, it was ridiculous. Anyone who saw me taking her in probably thought I knocked her out and was going to rape her. We get to my room, do the dirty deed (she sucked), call it a night. Nothing special. I wake up, look to my side and there's a fucking white girl next to me. Jesus fucking christ, how much did I drink last night? Bitch. Bitch. Yo bitch. "Huh... what..." Get out. "Wha-" Get out of my room. "Are... are you serious?" Do I look like I'm joking, woman? "You're an asshole, you know that?" Yes. Get out. You'd think it all ends right there, but it doesn't. Firstly, I go to get breakfast with my friend, eat my fucking breakfast, then on the way back to the dorms realize my right hand is covered in dried up blood. This would happen again later in the semester with a different girl, except I would walk across campus in broad daylight and not notice till I got back, looking like a fucking murderer to everyone on campus. It was just gross the first time because I just ate my fucking breakfast without even noticing it. Awesome. Then I get back to the dorms and all the guys look at me, then bust out laughing to the point of crying. What the fuck are you guys laughing at? "Really dude?" Yeah, what's so funny? "How did you... how did you not see us?" What do you mean not see you? They proceeded to tell me about how really late at night, they had no idea where I was. Apparently the guy I rode home with didn't bother to tell anyone I rode with him, so everyone was flipping shit trying to find me. Being retards, the last place they decide to check is my room. Since everyone was really cool with each other at the dorms, nobody knocked, we just walked into each other's rooms. So they just walked into my room and saw me pounding away at a screaming white girl, then busted out laughing for a good 5 minutes before leaving. I didn't see any of this. I was facing the door when doing my business with the white girl that night. Which means I was so drunk, I didn't notice 5-6 guys in my room busting their guts laughing while I was copulating with a pale skinned individual. To add the cherry on top, the white girl denied (and still denies) that we ever did anything. She ended up getting with my Greek friend, he proceeded to ruin her life by introducing her to drugs. She's a fucking wreck nowadays. Knowing me and my friends isn't good for your health.[/QUOTE] Classy.

[QUOTE=barttool;32548827]I bet a fatty broke Maverick's heart. That's why he hates so much on fatties.[/QUOTE] He doesn't hate me. Or atleast never said it... :tinfoil:

[quote]Currently I am going through a stage where I am questioning my sexuality. I one thing I was sure on in the past is that I didn't find guys attractive, but then I saw an image of this specific facepuncher. Who is now making me question everything about myself and my sexuality, do I even like girls? do i like both girls and boys? Is this guy just a one off? The person I am currently lusting for shall not be named, the only information I may give is that he is 15 years old. Which in return makes this seem even more messed up than it already was. Every day I go to school and look around at my friends fantasying about whether I find them attractive or not, and to do this I imagine me fucking them. Or them fucking me. It's really making me picture my friends differently. I'm getting more distant and lonely from them everyday. I had a friend in the school who I know who is a open Bi himself. I told him about my Bi-Curiosity. For some reason I get the impression he wants to go out with me as he is constantly now chatting to me and even installed steam and added me on it. Just to talk to me. I can't seem to stop lusting and fantasizing about this facepuncher every day. I'm unsure what to do. There will be one other facepuncher who I talk to regularly reading this and will know my real account and identity. I would appreciate it if he didn't say anything[/quote] Probably saw Chickens!'s pictures on the WB thread.

[QUOTE=OogalaBoogal;32549005]latest confessions[/QUOTE] The first one seems to describe the feeling of depersonalization to me, just on a frequent scale. It's the feeling that you're detached, like you're watching a movie of your life through your own eyes.

[QUOTE=DudeGuyKT;32549275]The first one seems to describe the feeling of depersonalization to me, just on a frequent scale. It's the feeling that you're detached, like you're watching a movie of your life through your own eyes.[/QUOTE] I get the same feeling as this dude. The key is to try really hard to recognize your surroundings with more then just vision. Use all your other senses more to provide a more lifelike, well, life.

-snip-

if that really is maverick he kinda sounds even more like a dick than i thought he was

[QUOTE=KingKombat;32550776]if that really is maverick he kinda sounds even more like a dick than i thought he was[/QUOTE]He's history anyway. No loss. no gain.

[QUOTE=Tacosheller;32549096]Probably saw Chickens!'s pictures on the WB thread.[/QUOTE] Chickens! Nuggets

Some serious shit in this thread.

I think I want to ban people who say they've submitted an email. It's anonymous for a reason, dolts.

[QUOTE=Seiteki;32551256]I think I want to ban people who say they've submitted an email. It's anonymous for a reason, dolts.[/QUOTE] Not like it matters, the confessions come in batches so you can't really tell who specifically wrote what

Good job so far OP

[QUOTE]I was obsessed with hugging everyone I could find for example[/QUOTE] Whats wrong with that? I don't see how giving out hugs is a bad thing, unless he meant it in a sexual manner.

[QUOTE=Whomobile;32552254]Whats wrong with that? I don't see how giving out hugs is a bad thing, unless he meant it in a sexual manner.[/QUOTE]No. I think that would be [b]FUCKING[/b]. Why is it that MR. Alpha is sending stuff in when he's dead?

[QUOTE=Bomimo;32552867]No. I think that would be [b]FUCKING[/b]. Why is it that MR. Alpha is sending stuff in when he's dead?[/QUOTE] He can't let go?

[quote]I'm not sure why I'm writing this. Never hid it from you guys, but I guess this way I don't have to taste the rainbow. Well, I want to be a girl. Sort of, anyway. I'm in no rush to have my dick chopped off. But I want to live life as a girl. Guys clothes are just meh. Unless it's a suit it's pretty damn boring. Plus I just like feeling soft and feminine, and it gives me a sense of innocence. I even picked out a name. Decided to call myself Caroline (but pronounced Care-oh-lin instead of care-oh-line) in honor of Portal, and just cause the name sounds right. I guess maybe I'm writing this because I'm preparing to tell my Mom about this whole business. I plan typing and printing out a letter, putting the letter on her pillow, and going to a park to await her response. Yeah I know it's not super brave, but I just can't tell her face to face. I'll be a nervous, unhelpful wreck. Plus if she takes it bad and flips her shit, my ass can be long gone. [/quote] Anyone else think this is maverick?

No.

[QUOTE=Eluveitie;32554024]No.[/QUOTE] They are both obsessed with suits.

[QUOTE=Thoughtless;32553981]Anyone else think this is maverick?[/QUOTE] No The one about the white chick is probably him and the one about the fat girl is probably him but I doubt thats him

I'm pretty sure Maverick has posted that blood-story before.

"Raped by a gorilla" and "Double D-Day" stories are incredible.

[QUOTE=killerteacup;32554070]No The one about the white chick is probably him and the one about the fat girl is probably him but I doubt thats him[/QUOTE] Those long stories are definitely Maverick's. I've seen him post them before at least twice.