[QUOTE=Stonem;37117896]Maybe like a week or two into my relationship i think. He was first to say it though. I still feel the same way, like nothing has change for almost 11months.[/QUOTE]
my gf was the first to say it and it was only around 5 days into the relationship.
we had known each other for a few years before that though.
[QUOTE=Big Dumb American;37120834]Urp. Did you know each other previously, or was it literally a week from, "what's your name?" to "I love you"?[/QUOTE]
No, we knew eachother from before. Neither of us would ever have said it otherwise.
Due to the way she's been raised, my girl thinks there is no other way to make me happy and show she loves me than to do things for me, treat me like I am her master, pretty much kiss the ground I walk on. I hate it and I feel like a shitty boyfriend because of it, because I can't help her, and to other people it looks like I've made her become this submissive. I tell her "Tabby, you don't need to be like this." I can't think of a way to help her, can anyone help?
[QUOTE=MightyMax;37127254]Due to the way she's been raised, my girl thinks there is no other way to make me happy and show she loves me than to do things for me, treat me like I am her master, pretty much kiss the ground I walk on. I hate it and I feel like a shitty boyfriend because of it, because I can't help her, and to other people it looks like I've made her become this submissive. I tell her "Tabby, you don't need to be like this." I can't think of a way to help her, can anyone help?[/QUOTE]
Let her do what she wants. My mom is the same way, its just how she was raised and she just enjoys serving and doing stuff for others. Your girlfriend is probably the same way.
Just don't take advantage of her kindness.
[QUOTE=G3rman;37127298]Let her do what she wants. My mom is the same way, its just how she was raised and she just enjoys serving and doing stuff for others. Your girlfriend is probably the same way.
Just don't take advantage of her kindness.[/QUOTE]
I'd never do that. Hell, I'm the same way, towards her. I love serving her and doing things for her.
[QUOTE=CAPSMAN!;37114502]im gonna make u wish u never got unbanned
[editline]7th August 2012[/editline]
Preggo DEEP penetration
[editline]7th August 2012[/editline]
your move[/QUOTE]
You guys are so innocent.
Ever heard of a Portuguese breakfast?
[TABLE]
[TR]
[TD="class: word"][B]Portuguese Breakfast [/B][/TD]
[TD="class: tools"] [B]The Recipe [/B]
[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD][/TD]
[TD="class: text, colspan: 2"][B]Preparation: [/B]
[B]1) [/B]Find a willing and naked female participant. If the female is not naked or willing, halothane or a slow gas leak may help this process.
[B]2)[/B] Have her lie down with her back on the floor, propping herself up and spreading her legs open so she resembles the letter 'Y'. (Speaking of which, if she asks, "Why?", tell her to STFU before you give her a [URL="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Jelly%20Donut"]Jelly Donut[/URL] for breakfast.)
[B]3)[/B] Crack three large eggs into a bowl. Do not beat or whisk yet; that's in Step 7.
[B]4)[/B] Insert a funnel into her vagina and carefully pour the cold, raw eggs into it. Watch her wince and shudder as the chilly slime slips deep down inside of her. Awesome!
[B]5)[/B] Remove the funnel when all contents have drained into her vagina. Some bubbling/gurgling may occur. Let it sit for 5 minutes to warm up.
*BONUS: This funnel makes a dandy hat - wear it for comedic effect.
[B]6)[/B] Now, stuff your cock into that stench-trench and rapidly fuck her non-stop for at least 10-15 minutes to adequately scramble the eggs. Not HER eggs - the other ones.
[B]7) [/B]Continue to steadily pound her, occasionally pulling out to check the consistency of the mixture; it should be hot and frothy when ready. At this point, internal ejaculation is encouraged, but only if you won't be eating the finished product. That would be gross.
[B]8)[/B] Providing the female is conscious, have her carefully squat over a pre-heated & pre-buttered frying pan, and purge the frothy, mucousy contents out of her twat and into the hot skillet. This will produce a satisfying "splarsh" sound, followed by a bubbling sizzle.
*If your participant is an unconscious one, you may use a ladle
or spoon for this step.
*If you have a penchant for contracting foodborne illnesses,
you may use a straw to siphon it out, mouthful by mouthful.
[B]9)[/B] You can now cook this as you would any other egg-based breakfast dish; this can be scrambled with a fork or formed into an omelet. Add any vegetables, cheeses, or meats of your choice. Not YOUR meat - the other ones.
[B]10)[/B] Cook over medium heat until fully cooked. Salt & pepper to taste. Serves two.
*Serving suggestion: You may want to garnish by blowing a hot gooey load all over the top, as you would present a Hollandaise sauce, and make her lick the plate clean after she eats it all. Upon serving, be sure to say, "Bon Appétit, bitch!"
[/TD]
[/TR]
[/TABLE]
:v:
fucking eww.
Thats so cool.
[editline]7th August 2012[/editline]
the table formatting I mean.
I think 3 eggs are too much. 2 is more preferable. Makes a good meal for 1.
the pouring of the eggs into her using a funnel reminds me of a rather disturbing asian porn clip i saw this weekend featuring eels
[QUOTE=MightyMax;37127254]Due to the way she's been raised, my girl thinks there is no other way to make me happy and show she loves me than to do things for me, treat me like I am her master, pretty much kiss the ground I walk on. I hate it and I feel like a shitty boyfriend because of it, because I can't help her, and to other people it looks like I've made her become this submissive. I tell her "Tabby, you don't need to be like this." I can't think of a way to help her, can anyone help?[/QUOTE]
Try to show her how good it feels to be in charge every once in a while.
wow, I hope my Portuguese Breakfast recipe wasn't responsible for this topic being in the second page. :v:
[QUOTE=Behemoth_PT;37143069]wow, I hope my Portuguese Breakfast recipe wasn't responsible for this topic being in the second page. :v:[/QUOTE]
my boyfriend is afraid to look at this thread and the love advice thread now thanks to you guys
SNIP, stupid post.
[quote]Not YOUR meat - the other ones. [/quote]
[img]http://sae.tweek.us/static/images/emoticons/emot-downs.gif[/img]
[QUOTE=lil_n00blett;37131270]the pouring of the eggs into her using a funnel reminds me of a rather disturbing asian porn clip i saw this weekend featuring eels[/QUOTE]
Oh my fucking god, I watched the same video and was thinking the exact same thing. Weird lesbians and their fish eating friends. She literally shot the eels out of her.
[url]http://dailynewsdig.com/how-do-you-decide-who-to-marry-written-by-kids/[/url]
great advice for you all
-Snip-
[QUOTE=Jo The Shmo;37150002][url]http://dailynewsdig.com/how-do-you-decide-who-to-marry-written-by-kids/[/url]
great advice for you all[/QUOTE]
(2) No age is good to get married at. You got to be a fool to get married.
- Freddie, age 6 (very wise for his age)
Wise indeed.
My lady is going to her open house at school today. It sucks that I'm graduated and she is still in school. She's a senior so it's her last year though! Then when she graduates she's coming to live with me.
[QUOTE=MightyMax;37152341]My lady is going to her open house at school today. It sucks that I'm graduated and she is still in school. She's a senior so it's her last year though! Then when she graduates she's coming to live with me.[/QUOTE]
That's good news! Just one more year then.
Why is my first response to Portuguese Breakfast just thinking how impractical the serving sizes are...
[QUOTE=MightyMax;37152341]My lady is going to her open house at school today. It sucks that I'm graduated and she is still in school. She's a senior so it's her last year though! Then when she graduates she's coming to live with me.[/QUOTE]
oh how I envy you
So on a slightly more normal note I'm curious what experiences if any others have had with 69?
My boyfriend keeps trying to get me to do it with him, I mostly don't want to out of shyness.
which bit are you shy about? him going down on you or vice versa?
it can be good fun, but i appreciate if you're shy it can be difficult to uh (pardon the pun) open up. i'm not sure there's anything to recommend other than to relax and enjoy it...
oh, and i've seen it before where the guy's on his back and the girl on top, but i've only ever experienced when you're both on your side, which i think makes the whole thing a bit less intimidating (since you've got more freedom to move around instead of being all up in your face etc.) but i don't know if this is the norm or what! any guys have any input?
[QUOTE=Autumn;37158572]which bit are you shy about? him going down on you or vice versa?
it can be good fun, but i appreciate if you're shy it can be difficult to uh (pardon the pun) open up. i'm not sure there's anything to recommend other than to relax and enjoy it...
oh, and i've seen it before where the guy's on his back and the girl on top, but i've only ever experienced when you're both on your side, which i think makes the whole thing a bit less intimidating (since you've got more freedom to move around instead of being all up in your face etc.) but i don't know if this is the norm or what! any guys have any input?[/QUOTE]
While in a free fall is best.
[QUOTE=Autumn;37158572]which bit are you shy about? him going down on you or vice versa?
it can be good fun, but i appreciate if you're shy it can be difficult to uh (pardon the pun) open up. i'm not sure there's anything to recommend other than to relax and enjoy it...
oh, and i've seen it before where the guy's on his back and the girl on top, but i've only ever experienced when you're both on your side, which i think makes the whole thing a bit less intimidating (since you've got more freedom to move around instead of being all up in your face etc.) but i don't know if this is the norm or what! any guys have any input?[/QUOTE]
Him down on me, I go down on him pretty often and he reciprocates but face positioning is rather different, which is generally what makes me shy about it XP
Both times he has convinced me to try it (for very short periods of time) I have been on top. being on the side is actually an interesting suggestion, I might see if I can get him to try that. That might be a bit better than me feeling like I have my business all shoved up in his face, since its easier for him to move back XP
[QUOTE=Jo The Shmo;37150002][url]http://dailynewsdig.com/how-do-you-decide-who-to-marry-written-by-kids/[/url]
great advice for you all[/QUOTE]
HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?
(1) Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a truck.
- Ricky, age 10
[QUOTE=SparkDog;37154712]oh how I envy you[/QUOTE]
why?
[QUOTE=Rhenae;37158396]So on a slightly more normal note I'm curious what experiences if any others have had with 69?
My boyfriend keeps trying to get me to do it with him, I mostly don't want to out of shyness.[/QUOTE]
My only experience with 69 was kinda awkward. Not that it didn't serve it's sexual purpose its just that she was shorter than me therefore I didn't reach her with my mouth so I had to use my fingers.
It kind of disappointed me because I love doing oral to a girl and it was something I wanted to try for a long time before I did. And when it came to it, it didn't go quite as planed. I had to lean my head forward to reach there and it was very tiring.
Other than that, I think it was an interesting experience. Not something I look forward to do again but something I wouldn't mind trying.
I can understand the shyness. You feel quite exposed during it. Try turning off the lights to feel more comfortable. My gf at the time used to feel more comfortable that way when doing something more bold in bed.
Other than that if you like oral and feel comfortable doing it, I think you'll like it. However if you're shy about it, don't bother doing it until you feel comfortable and willing to. Take your time and explain to your boyfriend you still need to adapt to the idea with time.
Concluding and from a male perspective I think 69 was a nice experience. Not my favourite thing though. It was interesting.
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