Would forgetting to take birth control effect the chances?
[QUOTE=thisispain;37353764]there might be something in her psyche that's keeping her back. i wouldn't be too quick to assume there's something wrong on your end, though i understand why you would.[/QUOTE]
i'm sure it's nothing on bda's end but that doesn't mean it doesn't feel that way when it's happening. when someone you're with won't sleep with you it can be pretty demoralizing, especially if you don't know the root of the problem
[editline]22nd August 2012[/editline]
[QUOTE=Yahnich;37354486]also tbh, it seems like you're really pushing sex on her from my perspective. you probably don't feel that way, but i can easily see how she would feel pressured.[/QUOTE]
i dont think so, no moreso than anybody pushes it on anybody they're with
[QUOTE=steven688;37355762]Would forgetting to take birth control effect the chances?[/QUOTE]
affect the chances of, conception?
yes
but the type of pill she's on, how many she's missed, when she missed it are also going to factor in. don't be an idiot, if they say "if you've missed one pill you must use alternative contraception for the following 7 days" do it. don't risk it
@ BDA I'd give it time. It took me around 4-5 months just to get my hand in my gf's underwear, before though her personality outweighed all the sexul stuff so I didn't mind. I didn't really understand why she was resistant at first until a few weeks ago she told me I was the first dude she ever kissed and she's 19 while I'm 20.
Relationships are fun!
[editline]22nd August 2012[/editline]
Also I feel kind of ashamed because when I was in my first relationship at 17, I placed TOO much emphasis on intimacy and half the time the only thing on my mind was blowjobs. It feels nice having more control over my sexual side now
[QUOTE=Rusty100;37355832]
i dont think so, no moreso than anybody pushes it on anybody they're with[/QUOTE]
How can you be so sure? This is his perspective. He should try and connect the dots and see if there's something that he is missing. There's no shame in that.
Seems your pushing it a bit to me, its only been a month. There is nothing wrong with either of you if she wants to wait longer than that. Talk to her about it some time your not in a sexual situation, maybe she will explain wanting to wait or such.
Also is heon birth control because not being on it may also make her reluctant.
[QUOTE=Jmir 54;37356738]@ BDA I'd give it time. It took me around 4-5 months just to get my hand in my gf's underwear, before though her personality outweighed all the sexul stuff so I didn't mind. I didn't really understand why she was resistant at first until a few weeks ago she told me I was the first dude she ever kissed and she's 19 while I'm 20.
Relationships are fun!
[editline]22nd August 2012[/editline]
Also I feel kind of ashamed because when I was in my first relationship at 17, I placed TOO much emphasis on intimacy and half the time the only thing on my mind was blowjobs. It feels nice having more control over my sexual side now[/QUOTE]
My last relationship was like that, which is why I decided to wait until this one felt comfortable and established before trying to start workin' in a more intimate agenda. I guess I just got there sooner; I'm sure my lady will catch up eventually. In the meantime, I think I oughta give her a little bit more physical space. I don't feel like I've been pressuring too hard, but I've definitely been trying to push the subject a [I]little[/I] bit! Clearly, she feels it's a bit too soon for sex, though, so I'm going to back off for my sanity.
It's not even the lack of sex that has me feeling bad, it's just that having her turn down my little advances makes me feel like I'm doing something dirty or inappropriate. I think, for me, it's just a matter of, "I trust her enough to want to start getting more intimate; why doesn't she trust [I]me[/I] like that?"
I ought to account for the differences in our personality. I'm a romantic, a sentimental guy, and she's not so much. I think of sex as a high expression of trust and intimacy, and these are things she's self-admittedly not very good at expressing.
Well, going to my gf's house after work tonight, wish me luck guys.
[QUOTE=MightyMax;37347129]So what the fuck, these doctors are going to be sued to hell and back. She doesn't have cancer, it's fucking mono. How the fuck can you be such an incompetent fuck that you confuse MONO for A TERMINAL CANCER?!
The downside to this now is that means I have mono. Not a problem of course, I love her all the same.[/QUOTE]
Okay, fine. I get that you are upset but why the fuck do you americans (I assume, doesn't really matter) have to sue everyone. The doctors aren't trying to fuck with you, they are trying to help you and because of a simple mistake you need to make them suffer. SERIOUSLY?
Suing someone for a mistake isn't cool
[editline]23rd August 2012[/editline]
Everyone makes mistakes, sometimes they're big ones. pretty sure you'd hate to get sued if you were on the job and made a mistake. Provided nobody was physically hurt.
Gotta get that paper somehow
[editline]22nd August 2012[/editline]
Jk but that's a mindset for a lot of
People
[QUOTE=JohanGS;37358178]Okay, fine. I get that you are upset but why the fuck do you americans (I assume, doesn't really matter) have to sue everyone. The doctors aren't trying to fuck with you, they are trying to help you and because of a simple mistake you need to make them suffer. SERIOUSLY?[/QUOTE]
Probably because we Americans have to pay out the ass for our medical treatment, which makes us think of medicine in a more business-like manner. And besides, mistakenly telling somebody that they have terminal cancer is a pretty darn big "whoopsie."
While I wouldn't sue for it, I can definitely understand the kind of massive shock hearing that news would be. To leave you to stew with it for a week before saying "my bad" would be tortuous.
It's why doctors are required to have malpractice insurance. It's a broken system.
[QUOTE=Big Dumb American;37358236]Probably because we Americans have to pay out the ass for our medical treatment, which makes us think of medicine in a more business-like manner. And besides, mistakenly telling somebody that they have terminal cancer is a pretty darn big "whoopsie."
While I wouldn't sue for it, I can definitely understand the kind of massive shock hearing that news would be. To leave you to stew with it for a week before saying "my bad" would be tortuous.
It's why doctors are required to have malpractice insurance. It's a broken system.[/QUOTE]
Oh, I see. That sucks. :suicide:
see, comments like that just make me insanely jealous.
[QUOTE=Yahnich;37359988]"oh no i can't see my gf for a single week"[/QUOTE]
I don't see why you are making him out to be silly for being upset he won't see his girlfriend for a week?
Sure, you guys might have to go a month, or four months, to see your significant others. Doesn't mean you have to wish that on other people, or laugh when they only have to go through a fraction of the wait to see their SO.
I used to miss my SO like crazy just over the 2 day weekends. The time between when you next see your SO isn't an indication of your love for each other, just saying.
[QUOTE=RenegadeCop;37361586]I didn't have sex with my girlfriend until a year and a half into our relationship. That's when we both felt ready. I like to take things slow.[/QUOTE]
It's good not to rush that shit bro, good job.
[QUOTE=cocknugget;37361698]It's good not to rush that shit bro, good job.[/QUOTE]
To the people rating disagree, why so? Why do you believe it is a good idea to rush things such as having sex? Would be interesting to hear your opinions.
because sex isn't a big deal unless you're in high school or something. it's dumb to glorify holding out for months on end. you're making the assumption that having sex early on in a relationship is "rushing" it when the situation involves two consenting adults who are mature enough to make their own decisions.
sex is an expression of intimacy, sure, but for most people it doesn't define the intimacy of their relationship and is often irrelevant to it.
[QUOTE=loopoo;37363928]To the people rating disagree, why so? Why do you believe it is a good idea to rush things such as having sex? Would be interesting to hear your opinions.[/QUOTE]
i think rushing it might be sorta bad but i rated disagree because i really dont think just having sex in less than a year and a half is rushing it
life is about taking risks and pushing your comfort zone as long as you are well informed
[QUOTE=loopoo;37363928]To the people rating disagree, why so? Why do you believe it is a good idea to rush things such as having sex? Would be interesting to hear your opinions.[/QUOTE]
Because not everyone has to take years and years to be ready for sex. Just because you do it within a few months of beginning your relationship doesn't mean you are rushing or you are only in it for sex, it just means that you and the other person are that much more comfortable with one another physically and mentally.
I am willing to wait for the girl to be comfortable, but I am not going to wait a year for it. At that point its just a wee bit silly if you are uncomfortable around me in a sexual manner. Generally more than two-three months would set off an alarm with me that we are not compatible or there is something wrong on her end.
just got a text from my bf
"my mentor just told me he hadn't seen a neck as bad as mine since a threesome he was part of in the seventies. what. the. fuck."
and apparently his boss asked him how much being a part time vampire hunter pays yesterday..
that is not appropriate you should get his boss fired
file a lawsuit for defamation
it might not have been his boss who said it, i'm not sure. all i know is he and his boss had a discussion about the bite marks on his neck and ear
[editline]22nd August 2012[/editline]
another text, "angie just asked me if someone was trying to suck poison out of my neck after i got bitten by a flock of snakes. people are getting really creative"
lol i feel so bad right now
[QUOTE=loopoo;37363928]To the people rating disagree, why so? Why do you believe it isn't a good idea to rush things such as having sex. Would be interesting to hear your opinions.[/QUOTE]
"Rush" is pretty subjective, but most people would agree that waiting a year and a half for what is a pretty dang significant part of a healthy romantic relationship is a bit overboard.
it's pretty boring, what else would you do during that time
hold hands?
[QUOTE=cocknugget;37361698]It's good not to rush that shit bro, good job.[/QUOTE]
i rated it disagree because this is pretty much the definition of 'different for everyone'
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;37364147]it might not have been his boss who said it, i'm not sure. all i know is he and his boss had a discussion about the bite marks on his neck and ear
[editline]22nd August 2012[/editline]
another text, "angie just asked me if someone was trying to suck poison out of my neck after i got bitten by a flock of snakes. people are getting really creative"
lol i feel so bad right now[/QUOTE]
I remember this one time, my SO left a hickey the size of a plum on my neck. We didn't want people at school to find out (cause of her, really. I was fine with it but she was scared of being caught) so she made me wear some of her friend's makeup, and then I put a bandaid on it for good measure. And I wore a scarf, on a mildly warm day. Safe to say that people didn't fall for my getup, I got called out on it a few times :v: Good memory.
[QUOTE=RenegadeCop;37364233]So you would end a relationship if the other person wasn't ready to have sex?
I understand a year and a half is a long time to wait, but all of my past relationships have been rushed to hell and back and all ended terribly, taking it slow has worked out a lot better for us. As of now, we are completely comfortable with one another, not a single thing we can't talk about and we can be ourselves in front of each other.
But that's just us, every relationship is different. Knowing that, I can't really judge anyone else.[/QUOTE]
you're 17, right? at your age it makes sense to wait but adults generally take sex considerably less seriously.
[QUOTE=RenegadeCop;37364247]Months of foreplay sort've tided us over until the big moment.[/QUOTE]
i would just find that fustrating
[QUOTE=Big Dumb American;37364223]"Rush" is pretty subjective, but most people would agree that waiting a year and a half for what is a pretty dang significant part of a healthy romantic relationship is a bit overboard.[/QUOTE]
Ah, I am silly for not realizing everyone would be basing their reply on RenegadeCop's post. Personally, I find a year and a half a long time, but like Renegade said, they tided their time with foreplay, so I'd be okay with a year and a half of no sex but foreplay (but that doesn't really make sense in my head, if your girl is willing to participate in foreplay, sex isn't really a much bigger step from that).
When I said rushed, I meant more along the lines of "We've been together two weeks and I think we should have sex now". I'm not trying to glorify sex or put it on a pedestal, but I'm of the opinion that relationships that get started quickly where you and your girlfriend have sex within two weeks is destined to end badly, because that's more like a fling than a proper relationship.
Two to three months before sex is - in my books - a decent amount of time before sex pops up. I think the first month or two should be spent getting to know each other on a mental level, rather than the physical. It's more rewarding that way, because you really get to understand the other person completely and you both know that sex isn't the only factor in this relationship. I feel it makes the relationship more mature and gives you a healthy overall relationship.
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