[QUOTE=BoysLightUp;37371670]why did you keep saying she was black?[/QUOTE]
Because my personal preference aren't black girls, and my girlfriend knows that. I probably shouldn't have to reiterate it, but I was typing on the fly before class.
[QUOTE=Stonewall;37371541]wut do fp[/QUOTE]
your girlfriend sounds a bit crazy. jealousy is to be expected of most people, but to get that upset over something that trivial seems like a warning sign to me.
unless this gets nipped in the bud pretty sharpish i think you're in for a pretty rocky relationship.
[QUOTE=Autumn;37371934]your girlfriend sounds a bit crazy. jealousy is to be expected of most people, but to get that upset over something that trivial seems like a warning sign to me.
unless this gets nipped in the bud pretty sharpish i think you're in for a pretty rocky relationship.[/QUOTE]
Thanks for the wise words. I agree completely.
[QUOTE=Stonewall;37371541]So, my girlfriend sees a black girl post on my Facebook wall saying she misses me.
An hour later I get a three page rage text, cussing me out, etc. from my girlfriend. I explain that the girl is quite literally a black girl that went to my high school. I bring up this boy she 'used' to like and how she did literally the same thing, saying she misses him on his comments, wall, etc. I bring that up, and she says they're just friends.
I haven't talked to her since because her reaction was completely uncalled for. She texts me this morning asking if we're done.
wut do fp[/QUOTE]
I don't know the significance of the other one being a black girl
Anyway in retrospect you probably shouldn't have brought up that guy because it makes her think that if you have a problem with her doing it then she has a right to have a problem with it too
either get her to realise how ridiculous she's being or call it quits and move on to someplace where the grass is greener and doesn't blow in weird directions
[QUOTE=S31-Syntax;37368768]Woah, shit. How did that go?[/QUOTE]
Her dads from the generic military back ground so he has a hardon for respect he said thanks and as he was walking out the door he said "that little bitch" and i heard him squeal out the driveway. They're both pissed.
[QUOTE=Stonewall;37371541]So, my girlfriend sees a black girl post on my Facebook wall saying she misses me.
An hour later I get a three page rage text, cussing me out, etc. from my girlfriend. I explain that the girl is quite literally a black girl that went to my high school. I bring up this boy she 'used' to like and how she did literally the same thing, saying she misses him on his comments, wall, etc. I bring that up, and she says they're just friends.
I haven't talked to her since because her reaction was completely uncalled for. She texts me this morning asking if we're done.
wut do fp[/QUOTE]
Your girlfriend seems to have some jealousy issues; it's sort of up to you to put your foot down and be stern, that or suffer that kind of persecution treatment constantly. Jealousy is ok to a degree, but when it gets out of hand and she obviously doesn't trust you I suggest nipping it in the bud.
Yeah, she certainly does have some jealousy issues. Her ex cheated on her so she trusts no one. We're arguing at the moment, seems like everything's coming out. I'll keep you guys updated.
[QUOTE=Stonewall;37372821]Yeah, she certainly does have some jealousy issues. Her ex cheated on her so she trusts no one. We're arguing at the moment, seems like everything's coming out. I'll keep you guys updated.[/QUOTE]
Well that's her problem, it's not like you're going to do the same thing.
Why is it so hard for girls to realise not every guy is the exact same, and that girls aren't exempt from cheating.
[QUOTE=Legend286;37373088]Well that's her problem, it's not like you're going to do the same thing.
Why is it so hard for girls to realise not every guy is the exact same, and that girls aren't exempt from cheating.[/QUOTE]
Just like it's hard to make people understand that happiness is not dependent on anything, same with women. They just don't want to, it's easier to blame the men and just get upset. Although, women have a point - men know shit about making a woman feel safe.
[QUOTE=Stonewall;37372821]Her ex cheated on her so she trusts no one.[/QUOTE]
i know full well that that is a shitty situation to be in, but she has [u]got to get over that[/u], otherwise she risks losing and alienating every single other person she ends up in a relationship with.
i was cheated on in my first 'proper' relationship (i say that because whilst it was definitely pretty seriou compared to all of our friends and peers we were only 16, so still pretty young), and it was just this mind fuck of him cheating and lying, me hearing from my friends and everybody else, but so desperate to believe that it was just lies from their side (my main female "friend" was well known for fabricating a heck of a lot if something wasn't how she wanted it), and then nearly losing all of my friends because they were turning their backs on me and just... ugh. it was pretty fucking dire.
and i believe by nature a majority of females are naturally inclined to be somewhat untrusting and jealous, most definitely where other girls and your boyfriend are concerned. but when i feel it happening to me i just have to stop for a moment, and look at what's actually the problem.
"oh my god he's texting a girl that isn't me!!" - oh wait, actually i text guys that aren't him all the time, because they're my friends, not because they're hitting on me or vice versa
"oh my god why does he have his arm around her in that picture? what happened the rest of that night???" - it's just a picture, people normally put their arms round each other for the camera
"oh my god why is this girl commenting on all his pictures and putting smiley faces after everything??" - well actually, she's the issue here, not him
do you see what i'm trying to get at?
like with your girl, just tell her to take a step back and actually look at what she was getting so wound up about. she got upset because a girl [U]wrote on your facebook that she misses you[/U]. ignoring all the possible stuff that you [i]could[/i] read into that (and trust me, girls are pretty good at reading a whole lot of bullshit into an innocent action) it was just a little phrase, that people regularly use between friends, that is all. it is not a big deal. and pulling out the "i was cheated on so i can't trust anyone" is pretty bullshit, you have got to get past that, otherwise you start being the issue in relationships. it's no fun to be constantly accused of things you've never done, or even just knowing that she doesn't trust you. of course it's not just a switch that can be flicked and you instantly have her full trust, but if you plan on sticking with her i think you need to have a good long discussion about how you can make progress. it'll take some work from you, but it's gonna take a lot more from her, and i really hope she's willing to do so. because if not, i'd seriously suggest you start thinking about if you really want to stay with her, it is no fun being in a relationship with no trust.
[QUOTE=Stonewall;37371541]So, my girlfriend sees a black girl post on my Facebook wall saying she misses me.
An hour later I get a three page rage text, cussing me out, etc. from my girlfriend. I explain that the girl is quite literally a black girl that went to my high school. I bring up this boy she 'used' to like and how she did literally the same thing, saying she misses him on his comments, wall, etc. I bring that up, and she says they're just friends.
I haven't talked to her since because her reaction was completely uncalled for. She texts me this morning asking if we're done.
wut do fp[/QUOTE]
neee naww alert the scary sirens
How do you guys recommend dealing with exes? Just last night, I had texted my ex after the longest time, eventually, I stopped beating around the bush and just told her how I felt. In short it came as a, "I'll get to the point. I didn't text you just to say hi. I've been meaning to tell you I can't get you off my mind. I'll be talking about chicks with the guys, but my mind always drifts back to you in the end. I miss you. A lot." A short while later, she responded, and we started texting straight up, apparently she had missed me, and she still had feelings for me.
Should I ask to get back together, or ask for closure? What should I do? I'm quite lost.
well if you both still have feelings for each other, get back together
unless of course something's stopping you, like the reason for your breakup (which i dont know)
[QUOTE=TearJerker;37374203]How do you guys recommend dealing with exes? Just last night, I had texted my ex after the longest time, eventually, I stopped beating around the bush and just told her how I felt. In short it came as a, "I'll get to the point. I didn't text you just to say hi. I've been meaning to tell you I can't get you off my mind. I'll be talking about chicks with the guys, but my mind always drifts back to you in the end. I miss you. A lot." A short while later, she responded, and we started texting straight up, apparently she had missed me, and she still had feelings for me.
Should I ask to get back together, or ask for closure? What should I do? I'm quite lost.[/QUOTE]
Well it depends on what terms the two of you broke up. I tend to find that getting back together with a girlfriend that I broke up with for deliberate reasons is a no-no. Rarely do people change, and if the relationship had some serious issues in the past then they might again arise.
If the breakup was less severe then go for it, something good can come out of it.
[QUOTE=Autumn;37373234]
"oh my god he's texting a girl that isn't me!!" - oh wait, actually i text guys that aren't him all the time, because they're my friends, not because they're hitting on me or vice versa
"oh my god why does he have his arm around her in that picture? what happened the rest of that night???" - it's just a picture, people normally put their arms round each other for the camera
"oh my god why is this girl commenting on all his pictures and putting smiley faces after everything??" - well actually, she's the issue here, not him[/QUOTE]
This is seriously the best possible way to approach situations like these.
I was cheated on by a girl and got fucked over [b]bad[/b]; it left me super bitter for years and I kept entering new relationships still hanging out to that resentment and mistrust.
Luckily my current relationship is phenomenal and I've managed to let a lot of that shit go... with time and help. My gf occasionally calls or texts and old, serious ex of hers because he's a vet aide and gives her lots of advice/free service with our pets. It used to drive me insane with jealousy, because it's pretty blatant he's still trying to get back with her even though he's in a relationship with another girl (who he cheated on MY girl to get with). I'd get so pissy and emotional about it all.
Eventually just had to take a step back and examine what was going on. "Oh hey, basically the only contact they have is when she wants to get advice or care for the pets, and why on earth would we turn down free service?"
Normally I wouldn't be cool with kinda "using" someone like that, but hey, if he's a cheating fuck with no remorse and still up to his shitty antics, I'm pretty okay with getting as much free shit from him as we can.
I'm starting to have some doubts over my relationship. This girl is funny, intelligent, and very beautiful, but I feel like she's emotionally closed off, and that she might not be willing to open. We get along fantastically as friends, but every time we've tried to have a deeper conversation about our feelings, I've been the one to do all the sharing. I'm the dude, aren't [I]I[/I] supposed to be the emotionally gruff one?
Over the past week, I've just been getting the feeling that she only trusts me on a superficial level. Without trust and openness, what do we have, except for a good friendship? Or am I just being overly romantic about this?
I want things to work out with Lady very badly, but if I can't get some kind of emotional reconciliation from her, I'll have to cut loose. Better to be alone than to be with somebody who's only going through the motions.
[QUOTE=DarkendSky;37371618]i hate getting drunk, but getting like, half-way to drunk is the best. i also don't like to smoke weed a ton but at a party i will chainsmoke cigarettes like a motherfucker
im gonna die at 30 aren't i[/QUOTE]
I love being completely drunk, I turn into the nicest guy ever. This one time, I cooked eggs (it was originally meant to be an omelette, but I was too drunk so I made scrambled eggs) for our group and we all ate and sat down and talked. Good night! I've smoked weed in the past, but I don't know why, I just can't relax to it. It makes me so nervous and anxious, because I feel like I'm not in control. I suppose I'm not the type who can just "go" with it.
And no, you're going to live a long and fruitful life <3
[editline]23rd August 2012[/editline]
[QUOTE=Big Dumb American;37377350]I'm starting to have some doubts over my relationship. This girl is funny, intelligent, and very beautiful, but I feel like she's emotionally closed off, and that she might not be willing to open. We get along fantastically as friends, but every time we've tried to have a deeper conversation about our feelings, I've been the one to do all the sharing. I'm the dude, aren't [I]I[/I] supposed to be the emotionally gruff one?
Over the past week, I've just been getting the feeling that she only trusts me on a superficial level. Without trust and openness, what do we have, except for a good friendship? Or am I just being overly romantic about this?
I want things to work out with Lady very badly, but if I can't get some kind of emotional reconciliation from her, I'll have to cut loose. Better to be alone than to be with somebody who's only going through the motions.[/QUOTE]
You seem to be thinking with a clear head. I was in a relationship like that for two years, me being the one who was happy to share my emotions and feelings, and her just never wanting to. I guess it just depends on the girl, at the end of the day. My ex used to have a tough time saying anything about feelings, and it was a rare rare thing whenever she would, so I'd savour it. To be honest, I wish I cut it off sooner, it was just constricting and distressing for me. I felt I was met by a brick wall whenever I'd open up to her.
I was in the same position as you: we got along fantastically, we made each other laugh, we were inseparable and enjoyed every minute with each other, but when it came to anything more than that, she would just not reciprocate, even though she said she loved me. I had the exact same trust issue, and used the exact same point, saying that without trust or openness, we're nothing more than friends. She wasn't okay with kissing / hugging / being intimate with me.
I'm sure you know the situation best, but from a guy who has been in a relationship somewhat like that, I'd recommend perhaps cutting it off. Finding a girl more willing to be open with you and trusting of you would make you much happier at the end of the day.
I dunno. Admittedly, I'm prone to an excess of emotion, and considering my rough history with the women in my life, I might just be imagining a reason not to get too close, or growing some little doubt larger than it should be. Errg!
Edit: Thanks, loop. I'll think about that for a while. I guess I ought to try and have a serious talk with her to see where this goes.
If you're in anything like the relationship I was in, the serious talk will be fruitless. You'll talk about how you're feeling, open up to her, explain that you want to make things better. Then you'll be met by the "wall". Back to square one, where you're opening up to her and really trying to make a difference, and she does the same that she always does - not really telling you how [I]she[/I] feels. I think my ex was actually emotionally-devoid, she had the emotional range of a rock.
But, here's to hoping everything goes great and you both understand what the other is feeling. Good luck, buddy.
[editline]23rd August 2012[/editline]
Oh, in one of your previous posts, you mentioned how whenever you'd try anything intimate, she'd reject you, which would end up making you feel extremely guilty and made you feel rotten? That's exactly what happened with me. I'm hoping that perhaps with you, it'll be different. It'll be better. But I went through two years, always thinking tomorrow will be better, maybe tomorrow she'll finally truly love me (how silly is that), but it never happened. She ended up dumping me because she wasn't happy, even though she gave me no means in which to make her happy (I couldn't go out with her, take her to the movies, anything. It was pretty dismal). One time, she absolutely blew me away when we were both sitting in the lunch room, eating. I was pretty tired as I'd been up late the night before, so I scootched over closer to her and rested my head on my shoulder. My God, I've never been shot down harder than that day. She turned around with the angriest face on and told me to stop, because it's uncomfortable and hurts her shoulder... I like to think my head isn't so heavy as to cause pain when I rest it on things, but I guess with her it did. I'm glad we're over though, I'm happy, and my prospects of finding a healthier relationship in which we'll both be content with each other makes me feel good about the future.
I just don't want you to end up going through what I went through, because everyone deserves to be in a happy, healthy relationship.
I appreciate the advice, bud. If things really are the way they seem, I'll have to stop seeing her. It'll suck eggs, but it's preferrable to a long-term superficial relationship. I need to think on it for a bit, and to have a talk with Lady before I make any final decisions. Here's to hoping things go well, because I really do fancy her quite a bit.
maybe you should get her drunk
[QUOTE=thisispain;37378207]maybe you should get her drunk[/QUOTE]
or roofies.
Maybe I should get myself drunk.
[QUOTE=Big Dumb American;37378231]Maybe I should get myself drunk.[/QUOTE]
Can you get me drunk?
Buy me liquor ok
Me and my girlfriend saw the guy she had a threesome with at the gas station today. ugggggggh
when did she have the threesome with him? and was it two guys, or a guy and girl?
[editline]24th August 2012[/editline]
:quagmire:
[QUOTE=loopoo;37380472]when did she have the threesome with him? and was it two guys, or a guy and girl?
[editline]24th August 2012[/editline]
:quagmire:[/QUOTE]
It was her bestfriend and her boyfriend.
[editline]23rd August 2012[/editline]
It was a couple years ago but fuck it still sucks
[QUOTE=BusterBluth;37380527]It was her bestfriend and her boyfriend.
[editline]23rd August 2012[/editline]
It was a couple years ago but fuck it still sucks[/QUOTE]
remember, you're dating HER not her sexual history. you may never know if she's thinking the same about yours
obviously i'll say move on past her history, but it's easier said than done, i've got faith in you though
[QUOTE=Big Dumb American;37378231]Maybe I should get myself drunk.[/QUOTE]
that sounds like a great idea actually, i'll join you
Look at the bright side, if she's done a threesome before, she may be willing to do it again :v:
[QUOTE=loopoo;37380826]Look at the bright side, if she's done a threesome before, she may be willing to do it again :v:[/QUOTE]
that's a dangerous recipe for disaster, gotta say
Sorry, you need to Log In to post a reply to this thread.
