Sex, Girlfriends and Shit III - General

ill spoil the end for you [img]http://i.imgur.com/YCPIl.gif[/img]

[QUOTE=Big Dumb American;37398786]Yup, gotta break up with Lady. Accidentally showed up an hour early to work tonight, and could barely get her to talk at all. It was just the two of us, and very quiet, so it became a bit awkward. Small talk was the most I could get her to commit to. When I asked her about the next time we could go out, she just said, "I don't know." It was nothing like this before, and I don't know what changed. I tried to let her inside, and asked her to do the same, and then she just disengaged. We could have really been good for each other, I think, but relationships are a two-way street. If you can't trust, how can you be trusted? I'm thoroughly bummed out about this. I don't even know how I'm going to talk to her about it yet. I have to do it face to face, just to give her that one last-ditch chance to give me [I]something[/I] that would let me know she actually cares about us. I'm sorry, I know I've been writing about this a lot on here lately! Writing is just how I clear my head, and I'm semi-hoping somebody will tell me I'm just being silly and that I have it all wrong and that I should just stop worrying and give things some time to see what happens, but I guess that's not likely.[/QUOTE] Come over and we can drink my good scotch and have man-bonding time [media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BM5vDvi4mXY[/media]

[QUOTE=loopoo;37398859]I've got to ask, how old are you? Because you're saying a lot of things my 49 year old dad would say. "Pull the trigger" "the game". Sorry, just curious, because an awful lot of what you're saying has a "dad figure just trying to fit in with the kids" feel to it :v:[/QUOTE] I'm a few months shy of 21, lol.

[QUOTE=ice445;37398942]I'm a few months shy of 21, lol.[/QUOTE] My bad then. Sorry <3

[QUOTE=loopoo;37398945]My bad then. Sorry <3[/QUOTE] It's cool. It probably has something to do with the fact that I'm legitimately antisocial. I historically have made very little effort to make friends my age, or talk at all.

Ice, why not just invite her to do something? Even though things seem to be falling apart with [I]my[/I] Work Girl, it's not because of a bad start. We barely knew each other at all before I invited her over to dinner. She said it was a complete surprise, and that she "yes" more because she wasn't expecting it than because she was interested in me. The interest came later, after a very lovely dinner and a few good dates. Whenever things get less boohooey, and I'm ready to get out there again, I'm not going to burn time trying to "get to know" a girl before asking her out. That's what the entire dating process is for, getting to know somebody. At the end of the day, you just hope you like what you find. If not, well, there's always next time.

[QUOTE=Big Dumb American;37399097]Ice, why not just invite her to do something? Even though things seem to be falling apart with [I]my[/I] Work Girl, it's not because of a bad start. We barely knew each other at all before I invited her over to dinner. She said it was a complete surprise, and that she "yes" more because she wasn't expecting it than because she was interested in me. The interest came later, after a very lovely dinner and a few good dates. Whenever things get less boohooey, and I'm ready to get out there again, I'm not going to burn time trying to "get to know" a girl before asking her out. That's what the entire dating process is for, getting to know somebody. At the end of the day, you just hope you like what you find. If not, well, there's always next time.[/QUOTE] As much as I just want to invite her to lunch, I just can't shake the idea that it's going to be an awkward "no" from her because it will be too random.

Okay, so here are your options: +Never say anything, never get anywhere. +Ask her out, risk a "no." How well she knows you really doesn't have a heck of a lot to do with it. I went on a date with a girl from class who I had never once spoken to, just because I was like, "hey, can I take you out to lunch? I'd love to get to know you." Granted, the first date was a bust, but at least I [I]got[/I] the first date, you know? [editline]25th August 2012[/editline] In fact, the last three girls I've asked out with that "tactic" have all said "yes." Just realized that. An unexpected little confidence boost in an otherwise unpleasant period. :] Before that, I did what you're doing now: I spent a bunch of time trying to "get to know" whatever lady I fancied, and ended developing an unspoken and unrequited crush and spiraling into a mope-fit because I didn't have what I wanted and was too silly to just [I]ask[/I].

[QUOTE=Big Dumb American;37399205]Okay, so here are your options: +Never say anything, never get anywhere. +Ask her out, risk a "no." How well she knows you really doesn't have a heck of a lot to do with it. I went on a date with a girl from class who I had never once spoken to, just because I was like, "hey, can I take you out to lunch? I'd love to get to know you." Granted, the first date was a bust, but at least I [I]got[/I] the first date, you know? [editline]25th August 2012[/editline] In fact, the last three girls I've asked out with that "tactic" have all said "yes." Just realized that. An unexpected little confidence boost in an otherwise unpleasant period. :] Before that, I did what you're doing now: I spent a bunch of time trying to "get to know" whatever lady I fancied, and ended up either developing an unspoken and unrequited crush and spiraling into a mope-fit because I didn't have what I wanted and was too silly to just [I]ask[/I].[/QUOTE] Well, I have just flat out asked before. And it ended in rejection unfortunately. I got the girl's number, but nothing transpired afterward. But, it's not that I'm necessarily scared of rejection. I just don't want to create an awkward situation that haunts me every time I go to work.

It's only as awkward as you let it be, buddy! When Cute Well Spoken Girl told me that she wasn't interested after the first date, I basically said, "Hey, no worries! Take it easy, I'll see ya in class." She tried to make things a little bit awkward, avoiding eye contact for a couple of days, but I just made a small point of showing I was cool with it, by smiling and waving and shit. She came up after a couple days and asked how I was doing, we chitchatted for a few minutes, then went our seperate ways, satisfied and comfortable with the resolution. It's really not as big of a deal as your brain is telling you it is.

absolutely true. awkwardness is a reciprocal feeling. it's just your self-doubt trying to sabotage you, and everyone has self-doubt.

It's true, I've got loads.

time to post stereolab again: [media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uQq1XVId-uo[/media] just hum this song, in your *times of weakness*.

wow that's some ancient ideologies there i mean your prime minister is gay and atheist.

What does FP think of a guy in gr.10 thats never kissed a girl? I didnt ask for this pageking

[QUOTE=Yahnich;37399970]grade 10 is like 16 right this is pretty standard[/QUOTE] Yea its 16, but really? Everyone else has, and it makes me feel awkward...probably because I am.

[QUOTE=Yahnich;37399712]wow, i have just found out exactly how conservative my gf's mom is. apparently i'm a piece of trash that probably won't stick around for much longer and she's worried that if we had sex that no 'decent' boy will want her daughter. thanks 'stepmum'[/QUOTE] stepmum?? well this relationship just got a whole lot more interesting...

[QUOTE=Killer monkey;37400243]Yea its 16, but really? Everyone else has, and it makes me feel awkward...probably because I am.[/QUOTE] i'll give you a good piece of advice: anything your friends brag about is probably 90% made up. when i was a teenager my *peers* used to brag about all sorts of stuff, that is until they actually were faced with it and found they had absolutely no clue because they never really did it. kissing a girl before 16 is not rare at all, maybe even a bit further than that, but you shouldn't feel bad about it.

yeah, and her being your step mum would make your girlfriend you step sister... i think what you mean to say was (possible future) mother-in-law

Here comes college to get in the way of me and my girlfriend going out ever. :v:

[QUOTE=Killer monkey;37399952]What does FP think of a guy in gr.10 thats never kissed a girl? I didnt ask for this pageking[/QUOTE] I'm 18 and I haven't even touched a girl's hand yet. *foreveralone*

A bit of a problem FP, I'm hoping you can help. My girlfriend loves me going down on her, and I love doing it, the problem is she's very sensitive down there, fingers and all are fine, but my tongue makes her twitch and I have to pull away. I don't think I'm going overly forceful, nor is it too light. Is there any way to overcome this barrier or will we just have to deal with it?

and you're certain the twitching is a bad sign?

[QUOTE=cyclocius;37401737]A bit of a problem FP, I'm hoping you can help. My girlfriend loves me going down on her, and I love doing it, the problem is she's very sensitive down there, fingers and all are fine, but my tongue makes her twitch and I have to pull away. I don't think I'm going overly forceful, nor is it too light. Is there any way to overcome this barrier or will we just have to deal with it?[/QUOTE] What do you mean twitching? And why do you have to pull away?

[QUOTE=Big Dumb American;37398786]Yup, gotta break up with Lady. Accidentally showed up an hour early to work tonight, and could barely get her to talk at all. It was just the two of us, and very quiet, so it became a bit awkward. Small talk was the most I could get her to commit to. When I asked her about the next time we could go out, she just said, "I don't know." It was nothing like this before, and I don't know what changed. I tried to let her inside, and asked her to do the same, and then she just disengaged. We could have really been good for each other, I think, but relationships are a two-way street. If you can't trust, how can you be trusted? I'm thoroughly bummed out about this. I don't even know how I'm going to talk to her about it yet. I have to do it face to face, just to give her that one last-ditch chance to give me [I]something[/I] that would let me know she actually cares about us. I'm sorry, I know I've been writing about this a lot on here lately! Writing is just how I clear my head, and I'm semi-hoping somebody will tell me I'm just being silly and that I have it all wrong and that I should just stop worrying and give things some time to see what happens, but I guess that's not likely.[/QUOTE] Dude, this story is almost identical to a relationship I ended few months ago. Was going good until she just became quiet and started avoiding me. When I tried to ask her out more, she kept dodging the question and she wouldn't talk to me. Here's what I did, I gave her some space. Sometimes people need some space to think, so I left her alone for a few days. Then I tried to ask her again, she said no, and we broke it off there. It really killed me because we had so much potential together, and she was really beautiful. But sometimes things happen and you have to roll with it. I dunno if this helps you at all... Good luck BDA, you sound like a nice guy I'm sure you'll find someone else quick.

[QUOTE=Autumn;37401739]and you're certain the twitching is a bad sign?[/QUOTE] She says it's "too much", so I figured it was too much too soon. So I went back down to softer smoother before going back, warming her up so to speak, but it was still "too much".

too much, what? may i ask as to how old she is? sounds to me like she's just unfamiliar with such a feeling, but that's not a bad thing!

[QUOTE=Autumn;37402296]too much, what? may i ask as to how old she is? sounds to me like she's just unfamiliar with such a feeling, but that's not a bad thing![/QUOTE] She's 19, 20 in a few weeks. Guess I'll just try again if she's okay with it. I assume by "too much" she means it's too sensitive.

I just grabbed a spoon

[QUOTE=cyclocius;37401737]A bit of a problem FP, I'm hoping you can help. My girlfriend loves me going down on her, and I love doing it, the problem is she's very sensitive down there, fingers and all are fine, but my tongue makes her twitch and I have to pull away. I don't think I'm going overly forceful, nor is it too light. Is there any way to overcome this barrier or will we just have to deal with it?[/QUOTE] Thats weird to me, I find i'm too sensitive with fingers a lot but with tongue it is okay for pretty much direct clit stuff, cause tongue is wet and smoother than fingers. But hey, everyone is different. Maybe your more careful with your fingers.