Met a drunk girl tonight walking outside my apartment. (live in college aprartments) I have a gf I am devoted to, but I always gotta think "what if?" She was on a whole nother level. I've never had problems with girls (not saying I ever got anything amazing looking) but this was on my mind, thought I'd post it. It's weird to think how many girls you just let go when you're in a relationship.
[QUOTE=Relaxation;37599577]Met a drunk girl tonight walking outside my apartment. (live in college aprartments) I have a gf I am devoted to, but I always gotta think "what if?" She was on a whole nother level. I've never had problems with girls (not saying I ever got anything amazing looking) but this was on my mind, thought I'd post it. It's weird to think how many girls you just let go when you're in a relationship.[/QUOTE]
i'd like to think you let go of all but one of them when yo in a relationship
how is that weird?
i would think monogamy was a pretty simple concept
i have started noticing more girls on streets and school after i got gf
[QUOTE=kman866;37599391]So what you are telling me is that if I beat the shit out of her, I will get to tap it, got it :v:
But seriously though, She calls me crying about him all the time. I've suggested dumping him, but she says "It's just so hard."[/QUOTE]
when i met my current boyfriend, i had been in a 3 year relationship with a guy who treated me like shit but i had kept going back to him. i was with him for about 6 months after falling for my current bf because i was afraid i'd just regret it and go back to him if we broke up again. my current bf and i knew we had mutual feelings for each other, and he knew i was in a shitty relationship (i complained to him all the time about it), but he never pressed matters between us and completely respected the fact that i was taken. he remained a good friend to me the entire time and i had a closer relationship with him than my bf even though it was strictly platonic at the time. i eventually broke up with my previous bf for him, but i wouldn't have done it if my current bf had pressured me at all. he was incredibly honorable about the whole thing.
tl;dr: let her decide for herself if you're better to her and she'll respect you infinitely more for it
Girlfriend moved to uni today :(
So I was with my girlfriend today, 2 and a half hour trip to see her in her city and we were applying for jobs together. I was meant to leave at 4:15, but she got a call from her friend at about 2and her friend was panicking about something and really upset, so she had to go see her friend, and I ended up leaving an hour later. Is it weird that I just didn't really mind/care all that much? I mean, I feel like I should have minded that I didn't get to see her, because it's such a long trip to do, but I just didn't.
At the time it was like a super chill time and we didn't talk as much as usual, it was just comfortable being around each other, and I figured that she should go comfort her friends but after she left I started worrying about the fact that I didn't really mind and that things felt different even though when I was with her, I didn't really count it as an issue.
... Is your underline question is whether something is wrong with your response to that situation, considering you drove 2.5h to see her and then something came up you were chill about it? Maybe, I don't think anyone can give you an answer here. You don't have to get upset unless you want to, you know....
[editline]9th September 2012[/editline]
[QUOTE=Maloof?;37599400]Like I said, she still loves him for whatever reason.
It's like if a family member that you cared about went through something difficult and turned into a complete asshole; you may still love and care about that person because you know that deep down they are still 'good'[/QUOTE]
Yes, surely it's because they still think they're good. Too much Teletabis. I would say it has more to do with the power of habit (i.e losing something you thought was yours forever is being taken away from you) and fear (i.e going back on "market" looking for new potential partners after being accustomed to your older one for so long...)
Ah man. I'm far too paranoid as a boyfriend. :(
[QUOTE=killerteacup;37600891]So I was with my girlfriend today, 2 and a half hour trip to see her in her city and we were applying for jobs together. I was meant to leave at 4:15, but she got a call from her friend at about 2and her friend was panicking about something and really upset, so she had to go see her friend, and I ended up leaving an hour later. Is it weird that I just didn't really mind/care all that much? I mean, I feel like I should have minded that I didn't get to see her, because it's such a long trip to do, but I just didn't.
At the time it was like a super chill time and we didn't talk as much as usual, it was just comfortable being around each other, and I figured that she should go comfort her friends but after she left I started worrying about the fact that I didn't really mind and that things felt different even though when I was with her, I didn't really count it as an issue.[/QUOTE]
No being chill about it is good. You know youve got a good relationship when you can go about your normal lives together comfortably and make compromises and understand that you dont have to spend every minute of your time together. Youre being a good partner by recognising you cant exclusively claim her time and the fact it doesnt bother you is also good. Be happy!
[QUOTE=metallics;37601210]No being chill about it is good. You know youve got a good relationship when you can go about your normal lives together comfortably and make compromises and understand that you dont have to spend every minute of your time together. Youre being a good partner by recognising you cant exclusively claim her time and the fact it doesnt bother you is also good. Be happy![/QUOTE]
being in a LDR I have trouble with this, it sucks. Last couple of nights with her blew because I was being mopey about it
[QUOTE=Jo The Shmo;37598920]well the thing is we did go with a group of people, and maybe she thought i knew some of the other kids (even though i didnt)
i think if i knew everyone that would be pretty fine, but i really only went because of her[/QUOTE]
Quite similar to my Friday night.
She was at another party and then she was supposed to go to the bar with her friends where we then would have met. But instead I was alone chilling around the mall while calling her every now and then and at one point one of her friends answers her phone and says that she's at the bathroom. After that all my calls go to the answering machine. Once I finally get the hold of her she explains that she has already had enough from the previous party and she is on her way home. And she had thought that I was hanging out with friends of my own where I was, so us not meeting wouldn't have been the worst thing.
Could have gone worse, since she did have a reaction full of awe and regret when she realized that she had ditched me.
Thus she said that she owes me one.
Now the question is; how to use that one she owes me?
[QUOTE=RenegadeCop;37601683]I feel so bad when I make my girlfriend spend money on me because my brain says "No! That's not how it works! [U]Society disagrees with your situation![/U]"[/QUOTE]
then it's a pretty dated view of society you have...
in my opinion people spending money on others should just be down to both their financial positions, completely regardless of gender, and i think assuming that "society thinks the guy should pay for everything" is becoming less and less common
if i'm on a night out and a friend buys me a drink, then i feel fine about that because it's nearly always on a longer term you-buy-me-one-i'll-buy-yours-back sorta deal, or if they've recently been paid and feel generous (opposed to me, a currently out of work student), but if it's a guy that i don't know who buys me a drink i always have to buy them one back, otherwise i just feel like i'm taking them for granted, or that i feel like i owe them something - neither are positions i like to be in
but that suits me, that way we can usually get through a few drinks and get to know each other a little better. the whole "guy pays for everything" is bullshit
There's probably a biological mentality of the man providing for the woman left somewhere in our brains.
[QUOTE=Sunday_Roast;37601713]Quite similar to my Friday night.
She was at another party and then she was supposed to go to the bar with her friends where we then would have met. But instead I was alone chilling around the mall while calling her every now and then and at one point one of her friends answers her phone and says that she's at the bathroom. After that all my calls go to the answering machine. Once I finally get the hold of her she explains that she has already had enough from the previous party and she is on her way home. And she had thought that I was hanging out with friends of my own where I was, so us not meeting wouldn't have been the worst thing.
Could have gone worse, since she did have a reaction full of awe and regret when she realized that she had ditched me.
Thus she said that she owes me one.
Now the question is; how to use that one she owes me?[/QUOTE]
No offence, but that sounds a bit wrong
I mean her saying that she owes you one is a figure of speech, it means she's thankful, you don't actually have the right to exercise that obligation on her
[QUOTE=JohanGS;37602054]There's probably a biological mentality of the man providing for the woman left somewhere in our brains.[/QUOTE]
Not, that's culture.
[QUOTE=Seith;37602380]Not, that's culture.[/QUOTE]
Then what is cultural habits based on?
[QUOTE=JohanGS;37602451]Then what is cultural habits based on?[/QUOTE]
socialisation
arrrgh why must she cuddle me and wake me up at 7 in the morning on a sunday when she knows I went to bed at 3 and that I'll probably be hungover in the morning
[editline]9th September 2012[/editline]
then she gets all mad when I ask her to let me sleep
[QUOTE=killerteacup;37602092]No offence, but that sounds a bit wrong
I mean her saying that she owes you one is a figure of speech, it means she's thankful, you don't actually have the right to exercise that obligation on her[/QUOTE]
Thankful?
That really wasn't the case.
Anyways we are going out next weekend, with better planning beforehand.
But I was thinking about asking her out for lunch during the weekend.
I dunno, Johnny, that doesn't sound like such a bad way to wake up.
[QUOTE=thisispain;37599598]how is that weird?
i would think monogamy was a pretty simple concept[/QUOTE]
Ah I realized that came across the wrong way, but when I think back on it, it's not in dissatisfaction, I just always thing how many other different routes my life would have taken had I been with someone else.
[QUOTE=JohnnyMo1;37602610]arrrgh why must she cuddle me and wake me up at 7 in the morning on a sunday when she knows I went to bed at 3 and that I'll probably be hungover in the morning
[editline]9th September 2012[/editline]
then she gets all mad when I ask her to let me sleep[/QUOTE]
Wasn't it you whom had asked your gf to stop waking you up early and she kept doing it?
and apparently still is, or am I mixing people up a bit?
Ask when I say I owe my bf one, I mean it and know how he will take advantage of it and don't mind, but that is gonna depend on your gf. She might get quite offended if you bring it up :v:
And I'm fairly certain that can take advantage of that one she owes me.
She felt so bad after she realized what she did that she went as far as to say that she should let me bitch-slap her for it the next time we see.
[QUOTE=Sunday_Roast;37606661]And I'm fairly certain that can take advantage of that one she owes me.
She felt so bad after she realized what she did that she went as far as to say that she should let me bitch-slap her for it the next time we see.[/QUOTE]
yesssss take advantage of the girl!! she owes you one BIG time mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.....
hey sunday_roast you sound like a creep just so you are aware
he's pretty much is after all other posts he made in this thread
My girlfriends gone to America for 3 weeks and it's made me realise just how much time I spend with her, I don't know what to do with myself now, I feel able to actually see my friends for the first time in forever
congratulations
[QUOTE=Maloof?;37597787]maybe you are being too clingy with it
try leaving it alone for a bit and seeing if it opens by itself[/QUOTE]
I know this was over a page ago, but you just made my day with that.
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