[QUOTE=killerteacup;37730531]I just met my girlfriends parents on the weekend and it was exactly this oh god it was horrible despite how nice they were they were lovely[/QUOTE]
Why, because of how uncomfortable it was?
You should have seen it when I met my ex-girlfriends parents for the first time :v: She's latina, so her mom was super nice and her dad was quiet and awkward.
I also think it's worth mentioning that he's an expert huntsmen with multiple trophies and awards for his marksmanship.
[QUOTE=ewitwins;37730748]expert huntsmen[/QUOTE]
Don't fuck this up
[QUOTE=Disotrtion;37731239]Don't fuck this up[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=ewitwins;37730748]my ex-girlfriends[/QUOTE]
He did.
I posted about this in the Social and Love advice thread, but I'll post in here too. Maybe writing it out again will help me feel a little bit better.
Today, my girlfriend suggested we "just be friends... for now". We've been together for over a year, and really close for almost 3. She explained to me that it wasn't anything I've done or not done, but more that she "isn't in the right mental or emotional state for a relationship right now". In February, she kinda had a nervous breakdown, and is recovering from that, plus with the added stress from her college courses and work, I think she's getting a bit overwhelmed, and feels that if we took a break from our relationship, it would take some of the pressure off of her. She told me that she still loves me, and doesn't want to "break up" with me, but right now it's just too much for her to handle, and hopes that in the future, we'll be able to get back into the relationship. She also said that this would make hanging out easier "Not more often, My schedule's kinda limited, but.... you know?" Of course, I wasn't sure what she meant, and she couldn't find the words to elaborate.
And of course the whole "I don't want things to get awkward between us." Which I know it will, for a little bit, anyway.
She'll still drive me home from class Mon and Fri, and we'll hang out during her break between classes on Weds.
After typing this all out, I do feel a little bit better.
Hopefully on Friday we'll be able to talk more about it.
[QUOTE=Chaotic Lord;37731674]I posted about this in the Social and Love advice thread, but I'll post in here too. Maybe writing it out again will help me feel a little bit better.
Today, my girlfriend suggested we "just be friends... for now". We've been together for over a year, and really close for almost 3. She explained to me that it wasn't anything I've done or not done, but more that she "isn't in the right mental or emotional state for a relationship right now". In February, she kinda had a nervous breakdown, and is recovering from that, plus with the added stress from her college courses and work, I think she's getting a bit overwhelmed, and feels that if we took a break from our relationship, it would take some of the pressure off of her. She told me that she still loves me, and doesn't want to "break up" with me, but right now it's just too much for her to handle, and hopes that in the future, we'll be able to get back into the relationship. She also said that this would make hanging out easier "Not more often, My schedule's kinda limited, but.... you know?" Of course, I wasn't sure what she meant, and she couldn't find the words to elaborate.
And of course the whole "I don't want things to get awkward between us." Which I know it will, for a little bit, anyway.
She'll still drive me home from class Mon and Fri, and we'll hang out during her break between classes on Weds.
After typing this all out, I do feel a little bit better.
Hopefully on Friday we'll be able to talk more about it.[/QUOTE]
Not going to lie, but whenever I've heard of something like this happening it means that the relationship is over. All this "oh it's just not right, I'm so stressed blah blah blah" is a load of BS. It's going to be really awkward. You guys will just get further, and further, and further away from each other and someone will feel betrayed or whatever(again I am just saying this from personal experience, such as guys I know or what I have read). Guys do the same thing. It's happened to my sister.
I think whenever you hear "let's just be friends" or something along the line, that means it's over. It's different from saying "let's take a break".
[QUOTE=DEG_fan;37731928]Not going to lie, but whenever I've heard of something like this happening it means that the relationship is over. All this "oh it's just not right, I'm so stressed blah blah blah" is a load of BS. It's going to be really awkward. You guys will just get further, and further, and further away from each other and someone will feel betrayed or whatever(again I am just saying this from personal experience, such as guys I know or what I have read). Guys do the same thing. It's happened to my sister.
I think whenever you hear "let's just be friends" or something along the line, that means it's over. It's different from saying "let's take a break".[/QUOTE]
I think that's part of why I'm upset about this is the possibillity that things [I]do[/I] get really awkward between us, and that we never do get back together and drift apart.
I have no doubt that she meant everything she said, and that she doesn't want this to be the end of our relationship.
As for your your statement on "be friends" vs "take a break". You may be right. I think she meant taking a break, because what she said seems to fit taking a break more than "being friends", but I guess I'll just have to see what happens from here.
[QUOTE=Chaotic Lord;37732046]I think that's part of why I'm upset about this is the possibillity that things [I]do[/I] get really awkward between us, and that we never do get back together and drift apart.
I have no doubt that she meant everything she said, and that she doesn't want this to be the end of our relationship.
As for your your statement on "be friends" vs "take a break". You may be right. I think she meant taking a break, because what she said seems to fit taking a break more than "being friends", but I guess I'll just have to see what happens from here.[/QUOTE]
No, you guys are broken up and you aren't getting back together and that's the line of thought you should definitely be taking, unless this issue resolves itself in the next fortnight or so.
You know why? because either it won't happen, and you'll be left disappointed and angry, or it will happen, but you sitting there in the meantime waiting for it to happen is going to leave her in a VERY uncomfortable position and put a lot of pressure on her should she decide to get back with you
It honestly does suck that she wants a break and I feel for you, because it's shit, but you have to sever yourself from the expectation that it'll go back to the way it was if you want to get it back to a happier place, or even to move on at all
if she's seriously asking to "take a break" from a relationship, even if she does get back with you, do you really want to commit to someone who changes their mind about you every other day?
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;37735704]if she's seriously asking to "take a break" from a relationship, even if she does get back with you, do you really want to commit to someone who changes their mind about you every other day?[/QUOTE]
I was going to reply but this just sums up what I think.
[editline]20th September 2012[/editline]
[QUOTE=Chaotic Lord;37731674]I posted about this in the Social and Love advice thread, but I'll post in here too. Maybe writing it out again will help me feel a little bit better.
Today, my girlfriend suggested we "just be friends... for now". We've been together for over a year, and really close for almost 3. She explained to me that it wasn't anything I've done or not done, but more that she "isn't in the right mental or emotional state for a relationship right now". In February, she kinda had a nervous breakdown, and is recovering from that, plus with the added stress from her college courses and work, I think she's getting a bit overwhelmed, and feels that if we took a break from our relationship, it would take some of the pressure off of her. [B][U]She told me that she still loves me, and doesn't want to "break up" with me,[/U][/B] but right now it's just too much for her to handle, and hopes that in the future, we'll be able to get back into the relationship. She also said that this would make hanging out easier "Not more often, My schedule's kinda limited, but.... you know?" Of course, I wasn't sure what she meant, and she couldn't find the words to elaborate.
And of course the whole "I don't want things to get awkward between us." Which I know it will, for a little bit, anyway.
[U][B]She'll still drive me home from class Mon and Fri, and we'll hang out during her break between classes on Weds.[/B][/U]
After typing this all out, I do feel a little bit better.
Hopefully on Friday we'll be able to talk more about it.[/QUOTE]
So basically she's keeping you on the hook while getting your hopes up. Soon you'll have front row seats to watch her moving on and away from you, and by then I'll bet she'll keep you on the hook too.
Man, I don't know her, but you have to think about you too. And you're just being the "nice guy".
What if she doesn't want to get back to you? If she loved you, she'd stay, trust me. Move on. Don't let her keep you on stand by. Right now, she owns you. She has your balls in her hand. Therefore you'll be easily manipulated.
She's just delaying your relationship indefinitely and you just sit and wait. I bet she feels good by that, cause she's not feeling any guilt. Don't be that kind of person, please. For your own sake. She'll hurt you.
I'm not saying she's a bad person, but she's not being honest with neither you or herself. You need to move the fuck on and stop waiting until she decides. That's her problem, not yours.
[QUOTE=Behemoth_PT;37735856]I was going to reply but this just sums up what I think.
[editline]20th September 2012[/editline]
So basically she's keeping you on the hook while getting your hopes up. Soon you'll have front row seats to watch her moving on and away from you, and by then I'll bet she'll keep you on the hook too.
Man, I don't know her, but you have to think about you too. And you're just being the "nice guy".
What if she doesn't want to get back to you? If she loved you, she'd stay, trust me. Move on. Don't let her keep you on stand by. Right now, she owns you. She has your balls in her hand. Therefore you'll be easily manipulated.
She's just delaying your relationship indefinitely and you just sit and wait. I bet she feels good by that, cause she's not feeling any guilt. Don't be that kind of person, please. For your own sake. She'll hurt you.
I'm not saying she's a bad person, but she's not being honest with neither you or herself. You need to move the fuck on and stop waiting until she decides. That's her problem, not yours.[/QUOTE]
When I see her Friday, I'll talk about it more with her, and see what she says then. She was really nervous when we sat down to talk about it, and it took her a minute of "I don't want you to be upset.... I think you will be, but I don't want you to be" before she actually said it, and then of course, there was me being upset about it. I think we'll be able to have a better discussion about it tomorrow, once we have had a day to think about it all.
And thanks for giving your honest opinions. Even though it's obviously not what I want to hear, I do appreciate it.
Well shit as it turns out my girlfriend is almost as nerdy as me.
Like I'm not even joking she's a pegasister, a homestuck fan, and an anime fan. She draws fanart an has a fucking tumblr.
She drew me with a v-neck once.
Now I can go on and say why I [b]despise[/b] almost all of these things. But it really, there are people who would KILL to meet this type of person. In some peoples eyes this isn't a curse or anything like that, it's a blessing to find someone as nerdy and silly as them. But it goes back to the ending of that one video on "waifuism" about building walls to segregate yourself from the "scum of the internet" and all that BS. Finding someone with even the smallest things in common with me has been a bitch. In this wasteland filled with stoner chicks and shallow ~3dep5u~ women who'll spring for a chance to date a jock rather than someone who, I dunno, who [b]isn't[/b] retardedly shallow, it's kind of hard to find someone who you can connect with and be flat out honest with. Funny thing is she's never really had a boyfriend so she is just as new to this as me.
So the moral of the story is that I'm pretty happy about this, and we're gonna go do something this friday. Gotta purchase some tick-tacks.
[QUOTE=Chaotic Lord;37736334]When I see her Friday, I'll talk about it more with her, and see what she says then. She was really nervous when we sat down to talk about it, and it took her a minute of "I don't want you to be upset.... I think you will be, but I don't want you to be" before she actually said it, and then of course, there was me being upset about it. I think we'll be able to have a better discussion about it tomorrow, once we have had a day to think about it all.
And thanks for giving your honest opinions. Even though it's obviously not what I want to hear, I do appreciate it.[/QUOTE]
It's the shittiest thing to hear and I'm really sorry for being the bearer of bad news. Not to get your hopes up, I think you might wanna "stay away" (as in not being available all the time or more often) from her for a while. Keep things in good terms as they are now and make her aware that you're ok with the breakup. Don't talk about it too much. You too have to set your own terms. If she says "but this is not exactly a breakup" or something like that you might want to reply "we both know it is" and "I can't be and not be in a relationship at the same time", cause honestly you can't. It's tearing you apart, and it would be really selfish of her to take advantage of your kindness.
Let her be the one to come to you more often, to talk to you. Become aware of the fact that she does not represent your life. She's a person in your life and a relationship is something between too people that are there for each other, respect each other and mostly respect themselves.
She must feel she may actually lose you.
Even if there is a chance she'll come back to you (don't get your hopes up), ironically, moving on improves that chance.
If you keep hanging out with her like you do so often, if you become available all the time. It won't work. It won't "teach her a lesson". She won't change, learn nor realize that she can't just put people on the hook for "if she wants to use them again".
And once again this is where Guy Mannly's response to you fits perfectly.
Anyway. It's an episode of your life. And good luck in the future. Just be strong, stay away from text messaging her.
[QUOTE=Behemoth_PT;37737441]If you keep hanging out with her like you do so often, if you become available all the time. It won't work. It won't "teach her a lesson". She won't change, learn nor realize that she can't just put people on the hook for "if she wants to use them again".[/QUOTE]
one of my friends went through the same thing with his ex and it really got to me. they were together on and off for three or four years and she put him through hell, she'd just end their relationship on a whim and then run back to him a few months later after her latest boyfriend broke up with her. the worst part was knowing she was getting away with being completely oblivious to others' emotions.
There's no reason to get any hopes up or even talk to her about that specific subject. Smile, tell her it would be awesome to be just friends as you were thinking the exact same thing. You don't have to answer each and every call she makes and you're free to be with other women and learn from your past mistakes. Be positive about this, as I see no negatives to it besides losing what you thought was yours. That's how I would react...
[QUOTE=Behemoth_PT;37737441]Just be strong, [B]stay away from text messaging her.[/B][/QUOTE]
That won't be a problem. My phone broke last week :v:
[QUOTE=gufu;37731612]He did.[/QUOTE]
Oh shit.
He must have been good at running
or hiding
My ex was Puerto Rican and black and oh-my-god pretty. Her sister was too, though there wasn't any weirdness there or anything. Just an appreciation for the general appearance that those genes combined to make.
If Maverick were here, he could have a whole conversation with me in which we agreed about something I bet. Brown skin is yummy. Unlike him however, I don't hold the whole 'white girls are hideous how could anyone ever be with them at all you are all pussies' mindset. Just a strong appreciation for certain skin.
Connected to that, I hate most piercings. Earrings are fine. Some people can pull off lip piercings and nose piercings. Bellybutton and onwards on the piercing scale though, and I am put off. I like skin a whole lot, and they're just a big jaggedy marring of it. Like, run your hands along and then you bump into that and it's in the way. It upsets the aesthetic of nice smoothness people naturally have going most of the time. Then again, I really dig simplicity in appearance on most people anyway.
I'm rambling because I'm tired and the guy talking about his mulatto girlfriend and self reminded me of that first part.
[QUOTE=MindMuncher;37743636]If Maverick were here, he could have a whole conversation with me in which we agreed about something I bet. Brown skin is yummy. Unlike him however, I don't hold the whole 'white girls are hideous how could anyone ever be with them at all you are all pussies' mindset. Just a strong appreciation for certain skin.
Connected to that, I hate most piercings. Earrings are fine. Some people can pull off lip piercings and nose piercings. Bellybutton and onwards on the piercing scale though, and I am put off. I like skin a whole lot, and they're just a big jaggedy marring of it. Like, run your hands along and then you bump into that and it's in the way. It upsets the aesthetic of nice smoothness people naturally have going most of the time. Then again, I really dig simplicity in appearance on most people anyway.[/QUOTE]
[I]it rubs the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again[/i]
[QUOTE=Disotrtion;37731239]Don't fuck this up[/QUOTE]
Oh I fucked it up good and plenty.
I'm decently sure it's not safe to go within a mile and a half of that neighborhood :v:
[editline]21st September 2012[/editline]
[QUOTE=Disotrtion;37737787]Oh shit.
He must have been good at running
or hiding[/QUOTE]
Well
To be honest it happened over the phone accidentally (just... just don't ask) and I've never seen nor heard from her family again. It's a shame, because her mom knows how to cook and she knew how to make strawberries taste better than they usually do (*coughwinkwinknudgenudge*)
What's the best way to reject someone when they ask you out?
"sorry, i'm not interested" as nicely as possible
[QUOTE=Chezhead;37743964]What's the best way to reject someone when they ask you out?[/QUOTE]
just make sure your answer is clear.
im not proud of myself but i sent my ex girlfriend ths
i felt like i needed to see this for somereason
i cant belive im even doing this i hope no one reads this
gonna post it anyway
look you know what ive been a complete dick i know that but that is my why of trying to hate you. it doesn't work because not a day goes by where i don't think of you. its hard to even type this because i don't want to look like even more of ass but its the truth. but at the end of the day im still the one who spent every minute of his day just trying to make you happy im the one who spent countless hours in the hospital with you and always wanted to make sure you were alright, your who thought the real you wasn't good enough for me, but im the one who still loves you and wants you back and would do anything to make it work. yet i still sit here thinking im not good enough for you. worrying that when i send this your just going to laugh
[QUOTE=InChoFace;37744722]im not proud of myself but i sent my ex girlfriend ths
i felt like i needed to see this for somereason
i cant belive im even doing this i hope no one reads this
gonna post it anyway
look you know what ive been a complete dick i know that but that is my why of trying to hate you. it doesn't work because not a day goes by where i don't think of you. its hard to even type this because i don't want to look like even more of ass but its the truth. but at the end of the day im still the one who spent every minute of his day just trying to make you happy im the one who spent countless hours in the hospital with you and always wanted to make sure you were alright, your who thought the real you wasn't good enough for me, but im the one who still loves you and wants you back and would do anything to make it work. yet i still sit here thinking im not good enough for you. worrying that when i send this your just going to laugh[/QUOTE]
Shit, you really need more punctuation. It was pretty hard to read.
Anyways, can you give the circumstances of the break up? You want her back? What happened? It sounds like you're begging here.
Edit: you're
Probably just another case of a girl being a complete enigma with her emotions and hormones and just fucking up what might of been a great relationship.
[QUOTE=DEG_fan;37744851]Shit, you really need more punctuation. It was pretty hard to read.
Anyways, can you give the circumstances of the break up? You want her back? What happened? It sounds like your begging here.[/QUOTE]
fuck it im just going to shoot myself later people
Send me Whey Protein before you do, you probably won't need the cash for the shipment back anyway when you're dead.....
... and some creatine monohydrate too... :>
[QUOTE=InChoFace;37745011]fuck it im just going to shoot myself later people[/QUOTE]
Pitiful. Nothing in life should make you feel this way, you are getting way too emotional. Man up.
My girlfriend feels ashamed when she's having fun-naked-time with me, because that's what over-eager-christian-society said she should feel, and thus doesn't want to get intimate any more. Well, FUCK YOU TOO SOCIETY!
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