[QUOTE=raccoon2112;37775392][B]ANYONE THAT DOESNT LIKE SEITH, CLICK THIS BUTTON[/B]
[IMG]https://dl.dropbox.com/u/22771846/Untitled.png[/IMG]
Everyone else: [B]QUIT TALKING ABOUT IT[/B][/QUOTE]
But then his posts are still replied to surely? Seith if the general opinion is you are being a dick, why not go with that and change something, it's an internet forum, not an intellectual proving ground.
[B]Back on topic:[/B]
Is it weird that i really can't be arsed to pursue relationships? Been on a few dates over the past couple of months, went pretty well, good chat, got to know each other etc. But then i just lose all interest and get back to my own thing because i find it more interesting and a better spend of my time.
So am i weird, do others do this? Is there some reason for it?
[QUOTE=Occlusion;37778056]But then his posts are still replied to surely? Seith if the general opinion is you are being a dick, why not go with that and change something, it's an internet forum, not an intellectual proving ground.
[B]Back on topic:[/B]
Is it weird that i really can't be arsed to pursue relationships? Been on a few dates over the past couple of months, went pretty well, good chat, got to know each other etc. But then i just lose all interest and get back to my own thing because i find it more interesting and a better spend of my time.
So am i weird, do others do this? Is there some reason for it?[/QUOTE]
There's nothing wrong with it. I went through most of high school not really interested in relationships. You shouldn't jump into a relationship till you feel ready and want to, there's no pressure.
Why was the guy asking for sexual things that weren't sex?
And if you consider intercourse to be the only true sex, then there's tons of stuff.
Otherwise, the previous suggestions were pretty good. Massage, shower, cuddling with little clothing (if any). Normally most sexual stuff is intended to transition into sex if the only reason you're doing it is to be sexual though.
This weekend in a nutshell
Friday: kiss
Saturday: break up over texts
Sunday: talking about Earthbound.
Maybe this is what I get for trying to date a nerdy girl with Mormon parents.
But I swear to god I fucking hate Mormons now. They were literally [i]pressuring her[/i] to break up with me. In their eyes she should be at least 2-3 years older before she can do what the fuck she wants to do. And I'm left crossing my fingers about her even still caring. But I really put her on the spot with that kiss thing and because I'm her first suitor she doesn't know what the hell she's supposed to do.
In the mean time I've got 3 years to play the sidelines and stick with her. Though I'm not sure if I can last that long in the infamous "friend zone" everyone seems to talk about for even a month.
But if she's as quick to change her mind as this weekend than maybe luck can come my way.
it all depends on your definitions. i personally don't think it's sex unless there's the potential of someone having an orgasm.
i could illustrate this for seith if necessary
[QUOTE=thisispain;37779393]it all depends on your definitions. i personally don't think it's sex unless there's the potential of someone having an orgasm.
i could illustrate this for seith if necessary[/QUOTE]
I think that's ridiculous, personally. Dry-humping is not sex.
[QUOTE=1337M347;37779390]This weekend in a nutshell
Friday: kiss
Saturday: break up over texts
Sunday: talking about Earthbound.
Maybe this is what I get for trying to date a nerdy girl with Mormon parents.
But I swear to god I fucking hate Mormons now. They were literally [I]pressuring her[/I] to break up with me. In their eyes she should be at least 2-3 years older before she can do what the fuck she wants to do. And I'm left crossing my fingers about her even still caring. But I really put her on the spot with that kiss thing and because I'm her first suitor she doesn't know what the hell she's supposed to do.
In the mean time I've got 3 years to play the sidelines and stick with her. Though I'm not sure if I can last that long in the infamous "friend zone" everyone seems to talk about for even a month.
But if she's as quick to change her mind as this weekend than maybe luck can come my way.[/QUOTE]
Hey I tried dating a mormon once. Can't date til you're 16 and even then it had darn well better be platonic because I swear to Heavenly Father if you actually enjoy anything from that relationship then I'd better see you repenting this Sunday.
Question. Is she mormon, or is it just her parents.
[QUOTE=S31-Syntax;37779469]Hey I tried dating a mormon once. Can't date til you're 16 and even then it had darn well better be platonic because I swear to Heavenly Father if you actually enjoy anything from that relationship then I'd better see you repenting this Sunday.
Question. Is she mormon, or is it just her parents.[/QUOTE]
That's the thing.
She follows a majority of the teachings (and refuses to do drugs & stuff like that) but obviously she's dating before the "accepted age".
Not to mention she ships JohnxKarkat from Homestuck and has bisexual friends so its hard to understand her stance on everything.
[QUOTE=WastedJamacan;37779460]I think that's ridiculous, personally. Dry-humping is not sex.[/QUOTE]
if you're dry humping to the point of having an orgasm you're probably having some kind of sexual activity
don't think of it as prudish, think of it as ~all-inclusive~
Hey Facepunch, I'm having one serious issue with my girlfriend (of six months) that I need some advice for.
Me and this girl have had next to no issues (minus stupid things like where to go when we hang out) for all these months. She's pretty happy, I'm happy, seems good. Except... she hates my best friend. She apparently despises her. I don't want to get involved in her hate, so I've just brushed that aside and talked to both of them. Best friend doesn't care much, but my girlfriend rages like hell. Says I should just go date my best friend instead and she doesn't want me talking to her, ever. This is based on how my best friend always calls me and such (mostly for tech support, neither of them are all that great with computers).
Of course, I wasn't going to just stop talking to someone for the sake of another. So I let this whole argument get buried for a couple of months.
It popped up again tonight, and it seemed pretty bad.
She otherwise lets me do whatever I want, it's just this one girl she hates.
Luckily she fell asleep, so I could bury this for another day at least.
I'm not sure what to do next time this topic gets brought up.
[QUOTE=1337M347;37779662]That's the thing.
She follows a majority of the teachings (and refuses to do drugs & stuff like that) but obviously she's dating before the "accepted age".
Not to mention she ships JohnxKarkat from Homestuck and has bisexual friends so its hard to understand her stance on everything.[/QUOTE]
Mmmmm. You are going to have a very difficult time with her, I'm just saying. I honestly hope you aren't looking at her with long-term possibilities... because depending on what part of the teachings she follows, it [I]will[/I] fall apart unless one of you changes sides. Either you have to go Mormon or she has to leave. Simply the way it is.
[editline]24th September 2012[/editline]
[QUOTE=ZonicTH;37780111]Hey Facepunch, I'm having one serious issue with my girlfriend (of six months) that I need some advice for.
Me and this girl have had next to no issues (minus stupid things like where to go when we hang out) for all these months. She's pretty happy, I'm happy, seems good. Except... she hates my best friend. She apparently despises her. I don't want to get involved in her hate, so I've just brushed that aside and talked to both of them. Best friend doesn't care much, but my girlfriend rages like hell. Says I should just go date my best friend instead and she doesn't want me talking to her, ever. This is based on how my best friend always calls me and such (mostly for tech support, neither of them are all that great with computers).
Of course, I wasn't going to just stop talking to someone for the sake of another. So I let this whole argument get buried for a couple of months.
It popped up again tonight, and it seemed pretty bad.
She otherwise lets me do whatever I want, it's just this one girl she hates.
Luckily she fell asleep, so I could bury this for another day at least.
I'm not sure what to do next time this topic gets brought up.[/QUOTE]
So whats her beef with this girl other than it looks like she thinks she's going to lose you to her?
[QUOTE=S31-Syntax;37780486]Mmmmm. You are going to have a very difficult time with her, I'm just saying. I honestly hope you aren't looking at her with long-term possibilities... because depending on what part of the teachings she follows, it [I]will[/I] fall apart unless one of you changes sides. Either you have to go Mormon or she has to leave. Simply the way it is.
[/QUOTE]
Man. I really was too.
And I'm not a religious person at all. Not flaming atheist or dumb shit like that but just sort of neutral.
And I'm certain putting somebody in that position is kind of like changing them as a person. No matter how much I disagree with her parent's teachings - from a humane standpoint trying to "revert" somebody to an image that I like is just as bad as those programs that "rehabilitate" homosexuals. And I'm not going to get thrown into some sort of program either so I might have a shot at somebody I've only known for a short amount of time.
I guess that's the bad part of this whole ordeal. It's a fucking coin toss if she follows the teachings as close as I think she does.
I really [b]really[/b] don't want to say this but I hope I can [sub][sub][sub][sub][sub][sub]"manipulate"[/sub][/sub][/sub][/sub][/sub][/sub] her to an extent to come around to my side of thinking. But I know it's wrong and I know it doesn't have a chance in hell of working.
[QUOTE=thisispain;37779689]if you're dry humping to the point of having an orgasm you're probably having some kind of sexual activity
don't think of it as prudish, think of it as ~all-inclusive~[/QUOTE]
sexual activity != sexual intercourse in my book.
[QUOTE=1337M347;37781221]Man. I really was too.
And I'm not a religious person at all. Not flaming atheist or dumb shit like that but just sort of neutral.
And I'm certain putting somebody in that position is kind of like changing them as a person. No matter how much I disagree with her parent's teachings - from a humane standpoint trying to "revert" somebody to an image that I like is just as bad as those programs that "rehabilitate" homosexuals. And I'm not going to get thrown into some sort of program either so I might have a shot at somebody I've only known for a short amount of time.
I guess that's the bad part of this whole ordeal. It's a fucking coin toss if she follows the teachings as close as I think she does.
I really [b]really[/b] don't want to say this but I hope I can [sub][sub][sub][sub][sub][sub]"manipulate"[/sub][/sub][/sub][/sub][/sub][/sub] her to an extent to come around to my side of thinking. But I know it's wrong and I know it doesn't have a chance in hell of working.[/QUOTE]
I dated Mormon Girl for 2 years. I knew from the start that it was going to end the way it did, but I couldn't bring myself to end it any sooner because I just couldn't imagine being without that feeling, and because she wouldn't stop dropping hints that she'd stay with me even if I didn't convert.
"I can't stand the idea of keeping you from the Celestial Kingdom..."
'Honestly, if being with you means I can only go to the telestial kingdom... that wouldn't be that bad'
That was the line that hooked me for another 6 months. We should have parted there. It wasn't until her mother scared her into dumping me and I spend some many months single that I began to realize that... she almost got me to change [I]me[/I] for the sake of conforming to what [I]she[/I] wanted in a man. And the only reason it got to that point was because I refused to entertain the idea of changing her. I knew that if, [I]if[/I] she left her church to be with me, it would result in a permanent resentment towards me and a constant guilt that I made her change her belief structure to be with me.
If it comes down to changing either you or her in order to stay together, especially when faith comes into play, then you two aren't supposed to work out and you need to move on.
[QUOTE=ZonicTH;37780111]I'm not sure what to do next time this topic gets brought up.[/QUOTE]
What does she say? If someone I was with tried to hassle me about seeing any of my friends I wouldn't even engage in argument with them. I would make it very clear (in a polite way) that my friends are none of her business and you don't don't have to answer to her. As long as contact with your friend isn't interfering with the relationship directly then you're doing nothing wrong, your girlfriend isn't going to break up with you over it, and if she says she will then I would question if that's the sort of girl you want to be with.
I have a couple girls to choose from. I'll keep it short since I'm on a tight schedule, but which do you think is the best?
-Childhood Friend, "S". Likes a little anime (not the same kind, but whatever), is slightly obsessed with me, and is very shy and not self-confident. Quite attractive and loyal, but has a very religious, strict family. My family knows them very well and I have known her for more than half of my life.
-Spunky Classes Chick, "J". Likes comics and comics movies, but only a few degrees from my ex-girlfriend. Friends with one of my best friends, and likes the shit I do. Do not know much about her.
-Childhood Fiend 2, "K". Likes everything I do, we go to anime conventions together, but is constantly sick. Possibly asexual, but it could be worth a shot. Attractive and quite loyal with a sane family.
the only person i know who counts as asexual is this dude who is disabled and stuck in a wheelchair. apparently it screwed up his testosterone levels, so now he's some sort of weird neutral point in that sorta thing.
[QUOTE=Chezhead;37782890]I have a couple girls to choose from. I'll keep it short since I'm on a tight schedule, but which do you think is the best?
-Childhood Friend, "S". Likes a little anime (not the same kind, but whatever), is slightly obsessed with me, and is very shy and not self-confident. Quite attractive and loyal, but has a very religious, strict family. My family knows them very well and I have known her for more than half of my life.
-Spunky Classes Chick, "J". Likes comics and comics movies, but only a few degrees from my ex-girlfriend. Friends with one of my best friends, and likes the shit I do. Do not know much about her.
-Childhood Fiend 2, "K". Likes everything I do, we go to anime conventions together, but is constantly sick. Possibly asexual, but it could be worth a shot. Attractive and quite loyal with a sane family.[/QUOTE]
for some reason this comes off as really creepy
probably because what you're looking for in terms of a girlfriend is them liking anime and being "loyal"
[QUOTE=1337M347;37779390]This weekend in a nutshell
Friday: kiss
Saturday: break up over texts
Sunday: talking about Earthbound.
Maybe this is what I get for trying to date a nerdy girl with Mormon parents.
But I swear to god I fucking hate Mormons now. They were literally [i]pressuring her[/i] to break up with me. In their eyes she should be at least 2-3 years older before she can do what the fuck she wants to do. And I'm left crossing my fingers about her even still caring. But I really put her on the spot with that kiss thing and because I'm her first suitor she doesn't know what the hell she's supposed to do.
In the mean time I've got 3 years to play the sidelines and stick with her. Though I'm not sure if I can last that long in the infamous "friend zone" everyone seems to talk about for even a month.
But if she's as quick to change her mind as this weekend than maybe luck can come my way.[/QUOTE]
Once she moves away from home, grab the popcorn. I have a mormon friend who moved away (to university) and then was suddenly exposed to a lot of new shit.
Long story short: He's now getting more action than most non religious guys I know.
Maybe she'll go to BYU. They [I]do[/I] call it "BYU I Do"
Oh, then there's the thing they do ad BYU where instead up hooking up for sex, they hook up for making out.
[QUOTE=Yahnich;37783929]oh i thought he was shopping for a pet
everyone knows loyal pets are the best[/QUOTE]
oh and when you throw in the fact that your pet likes anime, man, instant purchase
my lizard likes yu gi oh
[QUOTE=ZonicTH;37780111]Hey Facepunch, I'm having one serious issue with my girlfriend (of six months) that I need some advice for.
Me and this girl have had next to no issues (minus stupid things like where to go when we hang out) for all these months. She's pretty happy, I'm happy, seems good. Except... she hates my best friend. She apparently despises her. I don't want to get involved in her hate, so I've just brushed that aside and talked to both of them. Best friend doesn't care much, but my girlfriend rages like hell. Says I should just go date my best friend instead and she doesn't want me talking to her, ever. This is based on how my best friend always calls me and such (mostly for tech support, neither of them are all that great with computers).
Of course, I wasn't going to just stop talking to someone for the sake of another. So I let this whole argument get buried for a couple of months.
It popped up again tonight, and it seemed pretty bad.
She otherwise lets me do whatever I want, it's just this one girl she hates.
Luckily she fell asleep, so I could bury this for another day at least.
I'm not sure what to do next time this topic gets brought up.[/QUOTE]
Jealousy can be so insulting. In small quantities it's healthy, and can be cute to both people; but when it comes to full blown arguments like this she actually is saying, "I don't trust you enough around her because you'll probably cheat on me."
For someone you've been dating for 6 months to essentially tell you that she doesn't trust you seems wrong and insulting. Especially if you know that there is no chance you could ever abuse someone's trust like that. I'd set her straight before it spirals out of control; step up to the plate, plop your balls on the table and tell her that you mean fucking business. Let her know that it's not right in any way to show such mistrust when you have given no reason for her to suspect anything.
[QUOTE=JohnnyGoGo;37781914]What does she say? If someone I was with tried to hassle me about seeing any of my friends I wouldn't even engage in argument with them. I would make it very clear (in a polite way) that my friends are none of her business and you don't don't have to answer to her. As long as contact with your friend isn't interfering with the relationship directly then you're doing nothing wrong, your girlfriend isn't going to break up with you over it, and if she says she will then I would question if that's the sort of girl you want to be with.[/QUOTE]
I've tried the reasonable approach, it doesn't seem to work. Calm and polite leads to rage from her (on this one topic). She never said she'd break up with me over this, yet.
If anything, I've had to hang out with this friend far less to prevent more problems.
[QUOTE=Bredirish123;37785361]Jealousy can be so insulting. In small quantities it's healthy, and can be cute to both people; but when it comes to full blown arguments like this she actually is saying, "I don't trust you enough around her because you'll probably cheat on me."
For someone you've been dating for 6 months to essentially tell you that she doesn't trust you seems wrong and insulting. Especially if you know that there is no chance you could ever abuse someone's trust like that. I'd set her straight before it spirals out of control; step up to the plate, plop your balls on the table and tell her that you mean fucking business. Let her know that it's not right in any way to show such mistrust when you have given no reason for her to suspect anything.[/QUOTE]
I honestly don't get that though. I mean my best friend's in an even longer relationship (two years I think), and would never cheat on her dude. Hell, he's become a close friend of mine.
I had the notion this was all over how much my girl hates my best friend, and just doesn't want me interacting with her at all. (This based on the fact I've got a lot of female friends I'm close with, too.)
Though I do think I'll follow your advice and try a completely direct approach, toss the calm aside. Not sure when I want to bring this back up, though.
[QUOTE=ZonicTH;37788418]I've tried the reasonable approach, it doesn't seem to work. Calm and polite leads to rage from her (on this one topic). She never said she'd break up with me over this, yet.
If anything, I've had to hang out with this friend far less to prevent more problems.
I honestly don't get that though. I mean my best friend's in an even longer relationship (two years I think), and would never cheat on her dude. Hell, he's become a close friend of mine.
I had the notion this was all over how much my girl hates my best friend, and just doesn't want me interacting with her at all. (This based on the fact I've got a lot of female friends I'm close with, too.)
Though I do think I'll follow your advice and try a completely direct approach, toss the calm aside. Not sure when I want to bring this back up, though.[/QUOTE]
Women are naturally jealous and protective of their man, some moreso than what is considered good for the relationship. You may see it as never being a possibility for you or your bestfriend to do something like that but your girlfriend easily can brush those reasons aside and ultimately fuel her "What-ifs".
What it comes down to is that a mixture of reasons can lead to her being so jealous or scared of you cheating. She may be naturally insecure, have an experience with cheating on a boyfriend or having one cheat on her, or she doesn't know how to handle certain emotions.
As I said, you need to just take the direct approach, confront her about it and set her straight. Don't yell at her, but be firm; sometimes the guilt card is the one that works best.
so my lady friend wants to be a bit more, lets say expressive, now. she all ready has some tattoo on her back of like an elephant and i dont get it or its meaning but whatever i guess. but now she wants another and wants like her entire ear filled with piercings and her other with some more too
my issue is that i dont like tattoos or piercings at all. i like to grow my hair out and have a bit of a beard but thats as "edgy" as i'll go, i like being normal. i understand its her body and i dont want her to not be happy and not get what she wants but i really dont like it. she's a very girly girl and i like that, always wearing dresses, make up etc and its really cute, i like feminine girls but having her talk about wanting more tattoos made me stomach drop
i told her i dont like them but idk. i guess just deal with it?
im 18, shes 19
i dont understand, im guessing you mean the rebellious part. probably could've used a better word for it.
[QUOTE=Ritave;37745655]My girlfriend feels ashamed when she's having fun-naked-time with me, because that's what over-eager-christian-society said she should feel, and thus doesn't want to get intimate any more. Well, FUCK YOU TOO SOCIETY![/QUOTE]
well don't force her
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