[QUOTE=Mr_Razzums;35490665]Hey man, we've all been there bro. Just know that it wasn't your fault. Just whatever you do don't call or text her at all. If she contacts you weeks later or whatever don't tell her how much you struggled with her loss. And whatever you do, don't beg for her back.
Personally I don't you should plan on talkin to her again in college. If you start talking again, great. But now i think you should try getting into a mindset where you will never talk to her again. Harsh I know, but trust me it feels so much better when you're no longer attached.
I care bro. It's not your fault, get some sleep mate.[/QUOTE]
Yeah. I guess you're right. It's just hard to accept the idea that I won't be with her again.
Thanks. It means a lot to me.
My ex wants to be friends with me and she also wants me to go and see her so we can catch up, is this a good idea?
[QUOTE=joshdasmif;35494322]My ex wants to be friends with me and she also wants me to go and see her so we can catch up, is this a good idea?[/QUOTE]
I think that depends on a lot of things. You need time and space after a break up, have you had that? Most importantly would you be comfortable with that?
Being friends is always one of those naff things you say that sounds reasonable when you break up, but most of the time simply isnt plausible, at least not straight away. There are always lingering feelings. Either of resentment or romantic but you have to give it time for those to go away.
A recent ex of mine wanted to be friends instantly after I left her, it was just her way of trying to hang onto me. I dismissed it at the time, but one day do eventually hope to be friends with her again, but we need to get over each other first.
[QUOTE=metallics;35494348]I think that depends on a lot of things. You need time and space after a break up, have you had that? Most importantly would you be comfortable with that?[/QUOTE]
Had about a month apart and roughly 2 weeks of no contact, I'm with another girl right now but I'm not sure how she'd react if she found out I was with my ex..
[QUOTE=joshdasmif;35494353]Had about a month apart and roughly 2 weeks of no contact, I'm with another girl right now but I'm not sure how she'd react if she found out I was with my ex..[/QUOTE]
Then I think you should at least find out what she thinks. Be open with her, tell her about it, but I should imagine she won't be to keen on it. Assuming she's a rational human being though being open with her should mean she doesn't flip shit at you. And if she does... why are you with her?
I'm actually a bit scared of what she would do if I even hinted seeing my ex again :v: I might be over-dramatizing but I don't want to be single again!
I mean I wouldn't mind catching up with my ex but I'm quite paranoid, she might just be setting me up for something. I said a lot of nasty things to her and now she suddenly wants to meet up... Not sure.
[QUOTE=joshdasmif;35494405]I'm actually a bit scared of what she would do if I even hinted seeing my ex again :v: I might be over-dramatizing but I don't want to be single again!
I mean I wouldn't mind catching up with my ex but I'm quite paranoid, she might just be setting me up for something. I said a lot of nasty things to her and now she suddenly wants to meet up... Not sure.[/QUOTE]
Politely decline then. You won't lose anything.
[QUOTE=MindMuncher;35491519]If she has never touched you before down there, then yeah, it would probably be a good idea to actually make out first...
People a little less inhibited when they're aroused, and you can guide her more easily.
This doesn't mean grab her and and stick it down your pants. It means focus more on her touching you while you guys make out or you finger her or whatever. I have this mental image of you sitting like a foot away and grabbing her boobs or reaching down her pants or something, and it's weird. If she's not comfortable touching you, then she has issues with something. Whether that's how comfortable she is with you, or how comfortable you seem to be with her.
I was in this position this year actually. It pretty much resolved itself. If you're up against her and she can feel you in your pants, and still ignores it regularly, then maybe you should actually talk to your girlfriend about it. She's sure to have an opinion on the subject, however awkward that may be (though you should get over that. If you plan on having sex with her, you should be damn comfortable with talking about it).
Sorry for that kinda uncomfortable post..[/QUOTE]
It has come up before but it didn't go down well at all. She got all concerned and felt that she owed me something because I was "pleasuring" her and so she didn't let me touch her for a few days. We talked it out, but it was more hassle than anything and nothing really changed.
Everything you said was really, really helpful, thanks a bunch man, and it didn't seem too uncomfortable to read.
[QUOTE=joshdasmif;35494322]My ex wants to be friends with me and she also wants me to go and see her so we can catch up, is this a good idea?[/QUOTE]
[img]http://assets0.ordienetworks.com/images/GifGuide/michael_scott/The-Office-gifs-the-office-14948948-240-196.gif[/img]
Just don't do it. I spend way too much time on the phone with a couple of my exes because they haven't moved on from me. One of them even wants to move up to Colorado with me to hook up again.
[QUOTE=joshdasmif;35494405]I'm actually a bit scared of what she would do if I even hinted seeing my ex again :v: I might be over-dramatizing but I don't want to be single again!
I mean I wouldn't mind catching up with my ex but I'm quite paranoid, she might just be setting me up for something. I said a lot of nasty things to her and now she suddenly wants to meet up... Not sure.[/QUOTE]
just let her go, damn. who cares if she wants to catch up, you're exes for a reason, and you're gonna make your actual girlfriend really uncomfortable by going and seeing her
I was with this girl today, and we've agreed to a friends with benefits thing. She came over for the first time last week, and we made out some, a little dry hump, nothing too much. Today we are together and get more serious. I finger her, do oral, all that jazz, but then it gets to me. I've never gotten a hand/blowjob from anyone, so I didn't know how it would go. It felt good (fuck yeah blowjobs) but in the end I couldn't come at all. I was just kinda sitting there awkwardly apologizing to her the whole time. It was pretty embarrassing.
Any tips in that area?
either you were too nervous, or you're just the kind of person who doesn't get off on blowjobs.
My girlfriend of seven months broke up me with me on Sunday, we didn't get to see each other too often because of her dancing a lot. I never thought it would happen, right from the very beginning, if you ask my now, I'll say loves a bitch.
[QUOTE=Katamari_Jr;35503263]I was with this girl today, and we've agreed to a friends with benefits thing. She came over for the first time last week, and we made out some, a little dry hump, nothing too much. Today we are together and get more serious. I finger her, do oral, all that jazz, but then it gets to me. I've never gotten a hand/blowjob from anyone, so I didn't know how it would go. It felt good (fuck yeah blowjobs) but in the end I couldn't come at all. I was just kinda sitting there awkwardly apologizing to her the whole time. It was pretty embarrassing.
Any tips in that area?[/QUOTE]
I'm no expert but I think apologising after any sexual act aside from rape isn't quite right.
[QUOTE=~ZOMG;35503546]I'm no expert but I think apologising after any sexual act aside from rape isn't quite right.[/QUOTE]
I don't think apologizing during rape works either.
hey yeah its me again, really sorry about the rape, i dont know what came over me it normally never happens
just get back to me plz id like to clear things up, thanks!!
dont apologize for rape, just own up to what act you've just committed
oh, and make sure they take a shower when you're done, get rid of that evidence. scrub-a-dub dub!
[QUOTE=Jo The Shmo;35504197]hey yeah its me again, really sorry about the rape, i dont know what came over me it normally never happens
just get back to me plz id like to clear things up, thanks!![/QUOTE]
Actually, I've seen this happen. I was talking with my girlfriend over skype when she gets a phone call "Ugh, I don't want to talk to this guy, but he keeps calling me. Give me five minutes and I'll bitch him out. Love you! Bye!" So we closed skype, but she never came back and she wouldn't respond to my texts.
The next day I find out, via facebook, that she's broken up with me and gotten back with her abusive ex who had raped her a few times. I don't know what he said to get her back, but I assume it was something like you said.
[QUOTE=CoalTen;35504744]
The next day I find out, via facebook, that she's broken up with me and gotten back with her abusive ex who had raped her a few times. I don't know what he said to get her back, but I assume it was something like you said.[/QUOTE]
Stockholm Syndrome?
[QUOTE=Katamari_Jr;35503263]I was with this girl today, and we've agreed to a friends with benefits thing. She came over for the first time last week, and we made out some, a little dry hump, nothing too much. Today we are together and get more serious. I finger her, do oral, all that jazz, but then it gets to me. I've never gotten a hand/blowjob from anyone, so I didn't know how it would go. It felt good (fuck yeah blowjobs) but in the end I couldn't come at all. I was just kinda sitting there awkwardly apologizing to her the whole time. It was pretty embarrassing.
Any tips in that area?[/QUOTE]
MAybe she wasn't that good and maybe you just can last for ages which is a good thing :v:
[editline]10th April 2012[/editline]
Either way you definetly shouldnt be apologising
[QUOTE=Katamari_Jr;35503263]I was with this girl today, and we've agreed to a friends with benefits thing. She came over for the first time last week, and we made out some, a little dry hump, nothing too much. Today we are together and get more serious. I finger her, do oral, all that jazz, but then it gets to me. I've never gotten a hand/blowjob from anyone, so I didn't know how it would go. It felt good (fuck yeah blowjobs) but in the end I couldn't come at all. I was just kinda sitting there awkwardly apologizing to her the whole time. It was pretty embarrassing.
Any tips in that area?[/QUOTE]
If she says no keep going, jk in all seriousness sometimes it just takes a while. I got a bj for 15minutes one time non stop and didnt bust. I was a couple seconds from cumming and someone rang the door bell and killed it. Just tell her to be a trooper and it will be well worth the wait in the long run. Also she owes you an apology for not being good enough, apologizing to her is just awkward.
[QUOTE=RenegadeCop;35505330]Are you serious with your posts?[/QUOTE]
yeah 100%, why wouldnt I be. I just am on the tad far side.
lol because we can't tell whether or not you're trolling or actually legitimately serious. How old does someone have to be to even advise that for legitimate advice?
it works for me soo, idk. it sounds ridiculous, but you can get away with a lot surprisingly.
I know my last ex told me she wanted to be friends, because I seemed too far from her. I truly understood why. Just understand what your ex told you when she left you; if she's 'loyal' to you. You'll be fine. I may be in my young teenage years, but hell - my current girlfriend taught me a million things about a real 'relationship'.
[QUOTE=GreenDolphin;35505622]lol because we can't tell whether or not you're trolling or actually legitimately serious. How old does someone have to be to even advise that for legitimate advice?[/QUOTE]
Why does it make you feel so uncomfortable? It's not a legitimate thing to happen, her not being good enough?
[QUOTE=Methylparaben;35480626]If his brother had weak autism, it would probably have been spotted in him aswell. Thats what i rekon but I know nothing about how spotable autism is.[/QUOTE]
Yea, I have visited a psychiatrist, just to check, and she found me "normal", as far as that goes anyway...
(And yes I realise I'm like 3-4 pages late)
The autism is fairly easy to spot though, he is weird, extremely shy, almost never opens up, often raises his voice, and sees no problem in insulting our father.
My best friend's girlfriend recently had been texting me telling me she's getting sick of her boyfriend and my girlfriend making googly eyes at each other on the days I'm not there. (They are exes that get along as close friends now.)
Then my girlfriend texted me telling me that she can't do it anymore because she's been unfaithful, so she was breaking up with me. (She still feels around my stomach area and unnerves me.)
I'm also the backup to my best friends girl friend, as I comfort her whenever he can't, and she considers me an extremely close friend that she can tell anything. She feels as if he doesn't care for her and that shes not right for him, and that he doesn't truly love her, so she comes to me about that.
Harboring an extreme crush on her, I fight back the urges to take advantage and hurt my best friend, instead convincing her that she just needs to stop pleasing everyone around her and focus on herself and making herself happy. She waits it out and they went on happily after working everything out. Then she ends up moving away shortly after.
I'm just confused and my heart hurts.
[QUOTE=Mentlegen;35508137]My best friend's girlfriend recently had been texting me telling me she's getting sick of her boyfriend and my girlfriend making googly eyes at each other on the days I'm not there. (They are exes that get along as close friends now.)
Then my girlfriend texted me telling me that she can't do it anymore because she's been unfaithful, so she was breaking up with me. (She still feels around my stomach area and unnerves me.)
I'm also the backup to my best friends girl friend, as I comfort her whenever he can't, and she considers me an extremely close friend that she can tell anything. She feels as if he doesn't care for her and that shes not right for him, and that he doesn't truly love her, so she comes to me about that.
Harboring an extreme crush on her, I fight back the urges to take advantage and hurt my best friend, instead convincing her that she just needs to stop pleasing everyone around her and focus on herself and making herself happy. She waits it out and they went on happily after working everything out. Then she ends up moving away shortly after.
I'm just confused and my heart hurts.[/QUOTE]
You are a true mentlegen!
[QUOTE=Seith;35508017]Why does it make you feel so uncomfortable? It's not a legitimate thing to happen, her not being good enough?[/QUOTE]
Because expecting a girl to apologize to you for not being good enough at sucking your dick is pretty fucking retarded and if he actually thinks that's a good idea then his advice is shit and shouldn't be taken seriously.
[editline]10th April 2012[/editline]
[QUOTE=Mentlegen;35508137]I'm just confused and my heart hurts.[/QUOTE]
Aw I saw the winner ratings and was hoping this story was going to end with, "So my girlfriend broke up with me and got back with my friend, and I got with his girlfriend and we all lived happily ever after."
But I guess not ): Bad luck dude, you did the right thing though.
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