[QUOTE=The Man Who Speaks;14813496]"lol I sucked a sex the first time, im gonna go make a thread about it"
Dude, almost everyone blows it their first time.[/QUOTE]
Speak for yourself...
His/her job
[quote]Dream job: Comic Book Artist
Planned job: Comic Book artist
Job at the Moment: Police Department - Navigation [/quote]
[QUOTE=lintz;14812421]Silly Dictator, facepunching in your uni library. Someone might peek over your shoulder to find out what's so funny. Then you're screwed.[/QUOTE]
I often show my friends what I'm laughing at like the hiroshima thread with the person who was lucky/unlucky to have survived.
Oh wait, he doesn't live in Hallstatt, he lives in [B]California[/B], and he's [B]17.[/B]
According to his deviantart
[url]http://funkyhippo.deviantart.com/[/url]
And his steam community page, Glensdale california.
Cypher is my hero.
His name is
[B]Fernando Werty[/B]
We have him boys!
GET TO FACEBOOK!!
Going now sir!
I love it how whenever people make a thread about sex, everyone assumes they're lying.
Well, unfortunately I don't believe you either.
Shows nothing! D:
Cypher, man holy shit you're a real internet detective.
He doesn't have a Facebook.
Or a MySpace.
Woah, FP rocks.
Thanks guys :P
Trying but no look on his Facebook page,
But we have a name, an age, a job and a location :P
First time I had sex was a disappointment, but it gets [I]so[/I] much better.
[b]Age: 37[/b]
Gender: Male
Gaming Style: Uber-pwner
Real Name: fernando werty
Lying bastard
So his xfire says, but everyone lies on their xfire, loads have said he's 17.
Btw its [B]Glendale, not glensdale[/B]
[QUOTE=FunkyHippo;14810112]I know what you're thinking "Oh its just another goofin off thread/spam thread" I shit you not, its not one of those. Because today I had sex for the very first time, and I give it a "meh".
Seriously man, this is how it starts off:
I've been talking to this girl in class from Law school, and shes had always digged me, and I've always been digging her. Shes a red head, not too fat, but not too skinny, cute face and everything. We aren't those type of people that made smalltalk, we'd talk till the class was over, but we'd never see each other after class and go anywhere till today.
Today after class as she was walking the other way, I ran up to her and offered her some starbucks coffee, with her cute smile she said yes, so we went down to the starbucks that's under my apartment, (Yep, I'm awesome like that). So after I got her coffee I told her lets head upstairs to my apartment, and so we did. As soon as we got in I shut the door and she sits on the couch, looking a bit nervous and says "Look, we both know why you brought me here, lets just do it already!" I literally went :eek: So we started taking off our clothes and we started getting nasty on the couch. We made out first, we did the tongue kissing and wrapping, I even asked her to spit in my mouth and she gladly did, and then I digged my tongue into her mouth even more, that was literally the funnest part out of this session, because I love a girl's saliva.
So after the mouth stuff, we moved on to giving each other oral, I laid back on the couch and she got on top of me, she literally digged my face into her ass, I was literally licking her ass down to her panooch, no matter how nasty it was, I fucking enjoyed it, oh and of course she was sucking me off.
So we finally got down to me sticking my penis into her panooch(We even did more mouth kissing because the dirtiness is fucking kinky), it was good at first considering my bladder was full of piss (You get better orgasms when your bladder is full) she started bouncing her ass and rubbing my dick with her ass, then finally came down to the orgasm coming,she went even faster (I'm guessing we came the same time) and BAM! We both had an orgasm.
I didn't have a good orgasm, in fact it sucked, mainly cause her panooch wasn't tight at all, in fact it was a bit of a loose goose.
When I jack off, I jack off hard, and that felt better than the sex I had with this girl. Over all I'm happy I had sex for the first time. But making out with tongue and giving a girl oral is probably more fun real life experience than sex itself. Maybe an orgy party would be cooler.
I'm very proud of myself, and I'm sure when I tell my dad he will be too. And I want you to be as well, facepunch.
Oh, by the way, this is the awesome couch we had sex in
[IMG]http://i42.tinypic.com/2e0mtts.jpg[/IMG][/QUOTE]
you're so used to fapping to anime chicks having their guts ripped out that normal sex is tame.
ITT: internet stalkers.
Oh cypher you cyber stalker you.
[QUOTE=Cypher_09;14814138]So his xfire says, but everyone lies on their xfire, loads have said he's 17.
Btw its [B]Glendale, not glensdale[/B][/QUOTE]
I know, I was saying he lied on Xfire :v:
Guys I've just gotten a fucking brilliant lead, I'll be back in a few min with [B]MORE INFO[/B]
[B]GOT HIS EMAIL ADDRESS!
I can find him on facebook now!!!
[email]bikkoforpresident@hotmail.com[/email][/B]
