[QUOTE=Meader;24945642]Would this be comparable (NOT THE SAME) to what happens to me Pepin? Where I can understand and break down everything everyone is doing without even a thought. Everything is just so easy to understand, and people's real reasonings behind things they do are so clear and deep it makes everything seem shallow at the same time.[/QUOTE]
You have to understand that when you're figuring out other people that your thoughts are likely to not be true. It's going to seem true to you, but that does not mean it is. People on shrooms and acid often report that they know what other people are thinking or feeling, but this sureness if just an effect of the drug.
But going beyond that, drugs are very good for getting rid of one's own bias which can make a person's perspective much more clear. Certain people are very good at reading others. A lot of people make livings out of this. I've known you for a while and I'd say you have a good ability to read people. Being on pot may allow you to: get rid of any personal bias, focus more, and may even make it easier to think. All of that could make cause that effect, and there could be more. There were many studies that showed that LSD allowed people to think and problem solve way beyond their usual ability, and I think this has to do with the effects of there being less of a filter in our mind that allows people to think about aspects the filter would have normally removed.
As far as the effects you got, I think I've gotten something similar. I find that many times I come to a decision without even thinking, but after a few instances of smoking pot I've started to see all of the thoughts that culminate to that decision or thought. It was really weird because I was remembering instances throughout the day where I made a decision and it was like I could all of a sudden hear all the little thoughts that really made me decide what I did. It was really shocking and I didn't like it, plus everything seemed corny. What I find interesting now is that there are a number of studies that show that the brain usually comes to a decision about what you want 7 second before you realize it, which means you are reasoning out your decisions and thoughts without even knowing it. That night I kept coming to some realizations to how my mind and body worked and I didn't like it because it made me feel like there was far less to me than I thought there was, which I think could say made everything seem shallow.
So with all of that, I think we've had a similar experience. I've read a few trip reports that talk about the same kind of stuff.
[QUOTE=Pepin;24946594]What I find interesting now is that there are a number of studies that show that the brain usually comes to a decision about what you want 7 second before you realize it[/QUOTE]
I'm pretty sure those were "random" studies, that is where people had to choose from a set of pictures without any reasoning behind their choice. The mind is pretty predictable when it comes to making those kinds of random choices, if you've seen Derren Brown you know he makes a living out of it. I do not think it is safe to conclude from those studies that more complex, deductive and reasoned decisions take place in the same manner.
[QUOTE=Pepin;24946594]That night I kept coming to some realizations to how my mind and body worked and I didn't like it because it made me feel like there was far less to me than I thought there was, which I think could say made everything seem shallow.
[/QUOTE]
I get that too once in a great while. It's probably not complete ego death, but I think it's ego fatigue at least.
After I dosed shrooms the first time (like almost 4.0 grams dried cubes), after I peaked ego death hit me like a bitch. I was laying in my bed and I closed my eyes and all I could think about was what happened to me that day at school. I replayed every class, every footstep, almost every word of my day to myself in my head. The whole time it was playing out so realistically but I had a feeling in me that it was always only in my head. Then I kept telling myself that never happened, was never real. For about 45 minutes all I could do was think of my life and how nothing was actually real, it was all just made up by the universe and how I didn't really exist. The all I could see was myself, in darkness. I could see all of my fears and flaws pouring out of my body and then my body just shattered. It was honestly scary, but at the same time I think it was the most beautiful experience of my life.
is that even what ego death is? Or what \/:v:\/
Man ego death on K so many times, it's a nice experience to have. I think it's to thank for me no longer fearing and partially looking forwards to actual death too, maybe thats just me being morbid.
[QUOTE=MetalToast;24986227]is that even what ego death is? Or what \/:v:\/[/QUOTE]
There is no you in ego death.
I'm pretty sure I experienced this on my 2nd shroom trip but to be honest I'm a little confused by the definition.
[QUOTE=MetalToast;24986227]is that even what ego death is? Or what \/:v:\/[/QUOTE]
This isn't even close to ego death. It's just a mushroom trip.
I've had a very strong Ego Death the first REAL strong mushroom trip I ever had. As I was peaking, Echoes by Pink Floyd was playing in my friend's livingroom, all five of us sat in this large room, wallowed up in ourselves and not speaking to one another, just listening to the music.
I got into such a deep train of thought I wasn't a person anymore, there was no sense of self whatsoever, it was so fucked up.
So far no one here has described a real ego death experience.
My friend (call him jake) once did some mushrooms and we went to this place we call the gravel pit. On the car ride there, he was talking the usual trippy mushroom shit, clearly talking himself into drug-induced confusion. "I can't forget to remember... I can't forget... To remember..." At the time this all made so much sense to me, the whole car ride was all about remembering and then forgetting, but then remembering again. We couldn't forget to remember.
Once we got to the gravel pit, it's about a 10 minute walk up a trail to the top of the range of sand mountains. All the way there, my friend was acting weird. He was distanced, completely torn away from reality, and any interaction he gave us was a murmur or some sort of moan. By the time we got to the top of the sand mountains, looking over the edge getting ready to run down, he was sitting on the ground, in the fetal position, as if he was scared of everything around him. Being his best friend since grade 4, I was completely shocked. This is a guy who can get any girl, if you asked anyone in our high school that knew him, they'd tell you he was the funniest/coolest person they knew. He was never withdrawn or a loner, so to see him curled up in a ball on the ground, not talking to anyone, was frightening to say the least.
After I sat down in front of him, talked to him a bit, we managed to convince him to jump down the sand mountain with us (it's a lot of fun). This mountain is over 100 feet high, and is a very steep run down the side of it. We've done this about 3 times before this run right now.
The one thing I'll always remember will be his face. It was a mixture of depressed/sad, confusion, anger, but a large part of it showed hopelessness. As if any hope he had, any glimmer of light in his body was gone. He slid down the mountain, not jumping or running, and wound up at the end, sitting on the ground again. We got him up and brought him over to a place to sit at the base of the gravel pit. We didn't really want to wait around with him, since there's so much to do down there, so we left him there and ran around, did some sweet jumps, and when we looked back at him he was lying on the ground, in the sand, looking up at the sky.
This is where the ego death starts to come in.
After about 10 minutes, we all go to join him where he's lying down. He gets up, sits down, and starts to move towards some boulders/rocks on the ground. One of my friends approaches him, "Are you alrigh-", jake picks up a rock, about the size of his hand, and holds it, ready to throw it or pummel my other friend with it. Jake was completely and totally gone from our reality, and was existing as a raw human, with raw instincts. We've all been friends with Jake for years, so the fact that he would hold up a rock, ready to pretty much kill us, is beyond my comprehension.
The look in his eyes was so cold and blank, hopelessness mixed with anger, but fear was also there. He was scared of everything. He put the rock down and I slowly approached him and he looked at me with those hopeless lost eyes and said "I can't remember. I forgot to remember."
We all walked the long way around the gravel pit to the car (whereas we usually do a completely energy draining hike up the side of the mountain since that's still faster than the long way around). My parents were gone for the weekend, which is why we decided to do some mush in the first place, so we went back to my house to shower the sand off of us and just chill for the night while we came down. I told Jake to go upstairs and have a shower, we noticed that during his whole freak out at the gravel pit, he had actually pissed his pants. About 10 minutes later, I noticed the shower still wasn't running, so i went upstairs to the bathroom and saw jake lying on the floor of my bathroom. When I opened the door and turned on the light, he looked at me, open mouth, a completely blank stare. I did a little lol and left him for a bit longer. 20 or so minutes later, I went back up, and started to get him moving. I got him into the shower, and the rest of us started blazing in my room upstairs (which is right next to the bathroom). I gave him some of my clothes to change into, and we all sat in my room and blazed, playing sweet music until jake was back to reality.
This, to me, is a true Ego Death. Jake had no emotional connection to anything. Our friend "Jake" was completely gone, and in his place was thr raw inner workings of his self. He was no more than a simple and literal "Human Being".
It was an insane experience. We had all done mushrooms about 5 times before this time, so this wasn't at all our first trip. Everyone did 3.5g but I only did 2 since I wasn't really feeling a trip that night. There was one guy who didn't do any drugs, and he was our DD (Designated Driver) for the night. There was 6 of us in total.
[editline]07:18PM[/editline]
Sorry for the novel. It was one of the most insightful experiences of my life so far.
seems more like a bad trip to me, during bad trips your instics take over. and the visuals during bad trips on shrooms can be really fucked up ive been there
What do bad visuals consist of?
visuals on shrooms have a very natural feel to it. some of the visuals during a bad trip i saw was a demonic face/demonic shadows in the trees/human faces in the leaves of all the trees
its constantly a fight or flight state of mind
oh heres a nice article from shroomery on ego death
[quote]The Shroomery's Take
"Ego loss"..sometimes called "Ego transcendence" or "Ego death", is the state of mind when one temporarily bypasses, sees through, or otherwise transcends the limits of the ego.
Often this is reported as feeling a loss of sense of self identity, no sense of time/beginning. A feeling of being connected with the universe filled with love and peace and everything being one. The other side of this spectrum could be utter chaos, depending on your worldview and beliefs.
The ego is the function of the mind/consciousness that "filters" perceived reality through a set of pre-conceived notions and assumptions. It's basic function is to protect the mind/body from perceived threats to its reality. The ego can be associated with the "beta" brainwave, such as when you are actively engaged in conversation or doing something physical.
Ego loss, this author feels.. is an inaccurate term. Ego transcendence is a better description.
The ego is not some annoying obstacle to be rid of. It is a tool for spiritual growth, and has many lessons to teach us. One must not struggle against the ego, but flow with it, understand it, accept it, and become one with it. This is transcending the ego.
To go through ego loss, in laymans terms.. is to transcend the limits of the ego/individual personality, and become more aware of our existance as eternal spiritual beings.[/quote]
[QUOTE=Poo Monst3r;25045047]So far no one here has described a real ego death experience.
My friend (call him jake) once did some mushrooms and we went to this place we call the gravel pit. On the car ride there, he was talking the usual trippy mushroom shit, clearly talking himself into drug-induced confusion. "I can't forget to remember... I can't forget... To remember..." At the time this all made so much sense to me, the whole car ride was all about remembering and then forgetting, but then remembering again. We couldn't forget to remember.
Once we got to the gravel pit, it's about a 10 minute walk up a trail to the top of the range of sand mountains. All the way there, my friend was acting weird. He was distanced, completely torn away from reality, and any interaction he gave us was a murmur or some sort of moan. By the time we got to the top of the sand mountains, looking over the edge getting ready to run down, he was sitting on the ground, in the fetal position, as if he was scared of everything around him. Being his best friend since grade 4, I was completely shocked. This is a guy who can get any girl, if you asked anyone in our high school that knew him, they'd tell you he was the funniest/coolest person they knew. He was never withdrawn or a loner, so to see him curled up in a ball on the ground, not talking to anyone, was frightening to say the least.
After I sat down in front of him, talked to him a bit, we managed to convince him to jump down the sand mountain with us (it's a lot of fun). This mountain is over 100 feet high, and is a very steep run down the side of it. We've done this about 3 times before this run right now.
The one thing I'll always remember will be his face. It was a mixture of depressed/sad, confusion, anger, but a large part of it showed hopelessness. As if any hope he had, any glimmer of light in his body was gone. He slid down the mountain, not jumping or running, and wound up at the end, sitting on the ground again. We got him up and brought him over to a place to sit at the base of the gravel pit. We didn't really want to wait around with him, since there's so much to do down there, so we left him there and ran around, did some sweet jumps, and when we looked back at him he was lying on the ground, in the sand, looking up at the sky.
This is where the ego death starts to come in.
After about 10 minutes, we all go to join him where he's lying down. He gets up, sits down, and starts to move towards some boulders/rocks on the ground. One of my friends approaches him, "Are you alrigh-", jake picks up a rock, about the size of his hand, and holds it, ready to throw it or pummel my other friend with it. Jake was completely and totally gone from our reality, and was existing as a raw human, with raw instincts. We've all been friends with Jake for years, so the fact that he would hold up a rock, ready to pretty much kill us, is beyond my comprehension.
The look in his eyes was so cold and blank, hopelessness mixed with anger, but fear was also there. He was scared of everything. He put the rock down and I slowly approached him and he looked at me with those hopeless lost eyes and said "I can't remember. I forgot to remember."
We all walked the long way around the gravel pit to the car (whereas we usually do a completely energy draining hike up the side of the mountain since that's still faster than the long way around). My parents were gone for the weekend, which is why we decided to do some mush in the first place, so we went back to my house to shower the sand off of us and just chill for the night while we came down. I told Jake to go upstairs and have a shower, we noticed that during his whole freak out at the gravel pit, he had actually pissed his pants. About 10 minutes later, I noticed the shower still wasn't running, so i went upstairs to the bathroom and saw jake lying on the floor of my bathroom. When I opened the door and turned on the light, he looked at me, open mouth, a completely blank stare. I did a little lol and left him for a bit longer. 20 or so minutes later, I went back up, and started to get him moving. I got him into the shower, and the rest of us started blazing in my room upstairs (which is right next to the bathroom). I gave him some of my clothes to change into, and we all sat in my room and blazed, playing sweet music until jake was back to reality.
This, to me, is a true Ego Death. Jake had no emotional connection to anything. Our friend "Jake" was completely gone, and in his place was thr raw inner workings of his self. He was no more than a simple and literal "Human Being".
It was an insane experience. We had all done mushrooms about 5 times before this time, so this wasn't at all our first trip. Everyone did 3.5g but I only did 2 since I wasn't really feeling a trip that night. There was one guy who didn't do any drugs, and he was our DD (Designated Driver) for the night. There was 6 of us in total.
[editline]07:18PM[/editline]
Sorry for the novel. It was one of the most insightful experiences of my life so far.[/QUOTE]
Sorry about that, I felt like that on our last trip, but your story made me laugh because he couldn't forget to remember.
[editline]12:34PM[/editline]
[QUOTE=Mumblecrust;25051318]What do bad visuals consist of?[/QUOTE]
Angry and sad faces everywhere, objects become alive and you feel their hate for you, everything doesn't make sense, everything is distorted, shadows everywhere, and so on.
[QUOTE=kobilica;25062854]]objects become alive and you feel their hate for you[/QUOTE]
fucking this, i felt like the trees were mocking me and it was horrible at that moment.
[QUOTE=Poo Monst3r;24907937]
So when Ego Death occurs, the Ego is destroyed, allowing us to look into ourselves and "see" and "feel" the raw emotions which are always happening, but subconscious. It can be a very scary thing, or a very educational thing, depending on what you are feeling inside of you.[/QUOTE]
That sounds like what Buddhists and shit do when they meditate. I want to get to that stage. Roll on the drugs!
No, I am quite sure I experience one, because when I researched it days afterward it mirrored a lot of what I was feeling from the literature I read on it.
[QUOTE=MovingSalad;25071125]No, I am quite sure I experience one, because when I researched it days afterward it mirrored a lot of what I was feeling from the literature I read on it.[/QUOTE]
same, but hey i'm no expert
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