[QUOTE=kaskade700;19171830]How do I reject in a charming way?
[editline]01:17PM[/editline]
I hate society for this.
Also, the clothing part is so true.[/QUOTE]
Unfortunately, it seems to me like a lot of the time having to reject someone always leaves you feeling kind of like a scumbag. :frown: At least, if the chick is really into you but you're just not. (I'm assuming you're a man.)
It's kind of hard to be "charming" while rejecting someone--the best you can get is being as sincere and kind as possible while you do it while still delivering the message. What you say is very important here if you're trying to avoid hurting a girl's feelings. About the right sort of thing to say is something along the lines of, "I'm sorry, I'm not the one for you." You want to convince her that it's not something wrong with her (which you shouldn't think there is), but she's just got the wrong man. I mean, if you don't like her, then you two wouldn't be good together, right? If she insists you are, explain this logic to her. If she asks you explain why you don't like her and you can see she's emotional, DON'T. Tell her something like, "No, don't ask that question. Do not ask that question." If you explain and she's a more emotional girl, then you might reduce her to tears. However, if she seems perfectly stable and just asks for honest curiosity, then you can go ahead and tell her, most likely. If she goes absolutely psychotic on you, then you have the social weight behind you to either A) get the fuck out of there or B) demand that she leave you alone. But otherwise, remember that reducing a girl to tears is not very "charming"--but like I said, it's hard to be charming while rejecting someone.
Coincidentally, if you're a girl, this kind of works the same way for rejecting men, as well. At least, the weepy men. Really, the technique above is for people who are still on at an emotional level of a high school student. The most important thing is being sincere; don't try to be all laughy and happy or "charming" or whatever while you're [i]rejecting[/i] someone--that's just a dick move.
Good read.
I support the RU nomination.
[QUOTE=rapperkid04;19166894]I use a technique called "peacocking" where I dress and act so outrageously the chicks dig it :smug:[/QUOTE]
Yes, because we love gay guys. (Why do we?)
So I met this guy at my church. He seems really sweet and funny.
Man, I acted retarded. I was really shy and when I wasn't giggling nervously I was joking loudly like a spaz.
He seems a real geeky type, someone who would play vidya gams and post on here. I don't want to try and go out with him, considering he's like three years older than me and I don't want to date anyone now anyways, but I want to try and get his friendship.
How would you guys react to a girl acting like that? How do I fix this so I don't seem retarded?
[QUOTE=Scyze;19176943]Unfortunately, it seems to me like a lot of the time having to reject someone always leaves you feeling kind of like a scumbag. :frown: At least, if the chick is really into you but you're just not. (I'm assuming you're a man.)
It's kind of hard to be "charming" while rejecting someone--the best you can get is being as sincere and kind as possible while you do it while still delivering the message. What you say is very important here if you're trying to avoid hurting a girl's feelings. About the right sort of thing to say is something along the lines of, "I'm sorry, I'm not the one for you." You want to convince her that it's not something wrong with her (which you shouldn't think there is), but she's just got the wrong man. I mean, if you don't like her, then you two wouldn't be good together, right? If she insists you are, explain this logic to her. If she asks you explain why you don't like her and you can see she's emotional, DON'T. Tell her something like, "No, don't ask that question. Do not ask that question." If you explain and she's a more emotional girl, then you might reduce her to tears. However, if she seems perfectly stable and just asks for honest curiosity, then you can go ahead and tell her, most likely. If she goes absolutely psychotic on you, then you have the social weight behind you to either A) get the fuck out of there or B) demand that she leave you alone. But otherwise, remember that reducing a girl to tears is not very "charming"--but like I said, it's hard to be charming while rejecting someone.
Coincidentally, if you're a girl, this kind of works the same way for rejecting men, as well. At least, the weepy men. Really, the technique above is for people who are still on at an emotional level of a high school student. The most important thing is being sincere; don't try to be all laughy and happy or "charming" or whatever while you're [i]rejecting[/i] someone--that's just a dick move.[/QUOTE]
Not exactly my situation, I've had the problem of having 2 girls after me(As awesome as that actually makes you feel inside) at the same time, I obviously decided going for one of them, but the other one just doesn't get a hint. (Extremely flirtious behaviour etc., even though it's common knowledge that I'm quite into, and quite with the other one.)
I just don't want to be stamped as an asshole :(
(And yes before you ask, she [I]is[/I] dumber than some most animals you will ever see)
[QUOTE=kaskade700;19184074]Not exactly my situation, I've had the problem of having 2 girls after me(As lovely as that actualy makes you feel inside) at the same time, I decided obviously decided going for one of them, but the other one just doesn't get a hint. (Extremely flirtious behaviour etc.)
I just don't want to be stamped as an asshole :([/QUOTE]
Well, if the one pushy chick doesn't let up you might have to be a little bit more direct with her--unless you already have been, in which case she might still be convinced that she can "get" you. Or she might be trying to put a hole through your relationship with the other girl, or some other fiendish plot. If she's doing that, then a forceful push away might make her scorn like hell hath no etc. and then try and MAKE you look like an asshole--but that's a worse scenario. I don't know what this chick is actually like. Either way, the best thing you can do is be dignified and make sure to explain your intentions to this other chick so that no confusion happens, otherwise you might be fucked in one way or another. In total, no matter what she does, avoid getting pulled into her emotionality, just don't seem cold. Be polite, be pleasant, but be firm in your conviction. If you follow through on this, explain your situation to the people who may be questioning you (that matter and will accept an explanation), then the only people who will really think you are an asshole are the people who aren't really important, hopefully. Also, when explaining yourself never seem too urgent. Act like you're not really bothered by it, it's just a thing you have to deal with, it's just life. If you seem urgent people think you're trying to cover your own ass.
I'm pretty socially comfortable I know how to play it cool, it's just this chick. While being very kind and cute she's just dummer than rocks. And since she hasn't really approached me so I can't turn her down, but at the same time she doesn't get a hint which doesn't leave me with many options left.
Both the girls are gonna be at the new years party I'm going to though, and while it might be a perfect opportunity to make it obvious to her that I'm not interested and is with someone else. I still fear that she might fuck up the entire night, not for me but for the other girl. I guess I'll just have to wait and see.
Protip guys: If you are seeking help talking to women you are fucked either way. Grow some balls and do it yourself.
[QUOTE=abigserve;19187657]Protip guys: If you are seeking help talking to women you are fucked either way. Grow some balls and do it yourself.[/QUOTE]
Some people just don't have it in them. The good thing about meeting girls/people in general is that the procedure for social interaction rarely changes depending on age, sex or race. Therefore, it is possible to teach people how to become more social and accepted in public. You'd probably be amazed by the amount of people that goes to workgroups or seminaries involving social development, and as a matter of fact they actually work. I personally think it's amazing that some people are actually so social incompatible that they can't even talk to a girl without mumbling or stuttering and looking like a firetruck because they're 110% nervous.
Personally, the more time I spent with girls, the more experienced I got on how girls work. I had a "aha" moment when I understood how similar girls act and how easily it is to "get inside their shells" with correct actions and thinking. When you can understand and see this in your everyday life it's nothing you'll ever notice, it's just there.
No girls are impossible. They go to the club because they want to be picked-up by men, they totally want that cock inside of them. For all of you who think girls are innocent, fuck that. Generally speaking, girls are more horny than guys. The problem is the restrictions set up by the society, they do not want the stamp of being a slut. That's why they need to be on their guard, but deep down the only thing they want is to get the most out of their horniness, with the right man.
girls act the same way as guys (at least until they engage in more serious relationships). fact.
Why do you people hate on scyze? He/She (cbf reading) is giving you advise and you hate on He/She.??
Btw the best guide is your own, just use common sense and go by these rules(im a guy so ask somone else if your a girl =\); Make her laugh, Make her feel Special, Make her enjoy being around you. AND DONE?! make her feel like your better than any other guy and treat her better and you have her.
[QUOTE=Krzystylez;19192129]Why do you people hate on scyze? He/She (cbf reading) is giving you advise and you hate on He/She.??
Btw the best guide is your own, just use common sense and go by these rules(im a guy so ask somone else if your a girl =\); Make her laugh, Make her feel Special, Make her enjoy being around you. AND DONE?! make her feel like your better than any other guy and treat her better and you have her.[/QUOTE]
Great guide, will use this. Thanks.
I have this guide written on my arms (And part of my chest) it is very useful.
[QUOTE=TrafficMan;19195401]I have this guide written on my arms (And part of my chest) it is very useful.[/QUOTE]
Your arms and chest must be like nothing but black from all that ink.
Not to mentions the pictures must look weird, wrapped around your arms and all.
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