[QUOTE=ConvolutedLogic;26361742]The problem with that is that the child's going to depend on a reward/punishment system, and they're not going to be ready for the real world. That's not how it works. It programs children to think, "Okay, if I do this, I'm going to get a spanking and life will go on." So a kid can mess up, get the spanking and continue on that way. But in the real world, if you mess up at your job, you don't just get a punishment and continue on. You get fired. Life doesn't work with reward and punishment. Also, the children can easily and with every right lose respect for the parents.
It's twisted. It's like, what, you love me, so you're going to hurt me? How does that make ANY sense?[/QUOTE]
Well what do you think religion is? If I do bad, I burn in hell for all eternity, if I do well then I get to live in heaven for eternity.
Exactly. Religion was invented for the same purpose- the reward/punishment system.
Spanking/switches really aren't that bad, but a whip and literally punching them and kicking them is really bad though.
And tons of people are brought up using religion that turn out ok.
[QUOTE=Billiam;26361858]When a child does something seriously wrong I think parents should do one of those hilarious unconventional punishments that are seen in family sitcoms.[/QUOTE]
My dad's German so no, the usual punishments were sent to your room, nagged at by the mother or if the situation called it a good whooping
It can be.
It shouldn't be used though, as it teaches that violence is an acceptable means of resolving conflict.
spanking, tobasco/soap mouthwash should be as far as it goes
my parents were great, they would never withhold dinner or anything drastic/dumb like that
[editline]asdf[/editline]
funny thing is, they were both marines and I'm sure I had a childhood a million times better than a lot of people
Physical abuse or corporal punishment is negative reinforcement. This teaches a child "I shouldn't do this because I will get hurt."
It won't teach them good morals because they are never rewarded, only punished. The best way is to clearly outline with the child what is bad, and reward children for good behavior. This teaches them a positive way of thinking. They'll be more inclined in adulthood to go out of their way to be good, rather than just avoiding doing things that are bad.
However, spanking may be appropriate for certain situations in which the above doesn't work, or if the Child begins to start abusing the system "Always crying until receiving a reward". Obviously, parenting can vary a lot between people but a lot of studies have shown that physically hitting a child is the least effective alternative solution.
Edit: Time-outs are probaly the best to be honest.
[IMG]http://cdn.leasticoulddo.com/comics/20090802.gif[/IMG]
I have nothing wrong with a slap on the wrist of maybe the occasional spanking, but anything more than that (whipping, punching, etc.) is excessive no matter the offense and I would consider that abuse.
It shouldn't be used. It simply instills fear, or creates an association with the punisher and pain, especially if used at early stages of development. Taking something desirable away as a form of punishment is a much better alternative.
[QUOTE=Tukimoshi;26362481]Physical abuse or corporal punishment is negative reinforcement. This teaches a child "I shouldn't do this because I will get hurt."
[/QUOTE]
It's adding something undesirable, so it's positive punishment. Taking something undesirable away is negative reinforcement.
My parents slapped me on the arse when I did bad things and I'm not damaged.
There's a limit of course, and it shouldn't be used constantly, only for serious behaviour.
Rewards are important too though, it's well documented that rewards and punishments in combination work better than the sum of it's parts.
My dad always taught me that pain increases the learning ability
Mix of talking out why it's bad and a little spank/switch hit here or there is just fine.
A horsewhip is a little much, but if the children are being little bastards maybe they need a slap to pull into line
I feel like a good parent should be able to raise their child without any violence.
[QUOTE=MrJazzy;26364396]I feel like a good parent should be able to raise their child without any violance.[/QUOTE]
*violence :eng101:
[QUOTE=Hookerbot9000;26364420]*violence :eng101:[/QUOTE]
Ah I didn't even notice at first.
Depends, if you really beat the kid for fucking up then I'd count that as abuse.
But I do feel that kids these days need more corrective smacks across the head.
[QUOTE=Strongbad;26361417]Because teaching kids at an early age that violence is the solution is a GREAT idea![/QUOTE]
Physical punishment (when not exaggerated like some examples of punching and whips) was used for so many years, but recently it started being frowned upon. It's probably just a coincidence that you also recently started seeing kids doing what ever they want in class rooms because they know no one will touch them.
Whenever I misbehaved, my mother would hit me with a belt, and I turned out alright. However, if I ever have kids I wouldn't do it to them.
I was spanked as a child, I am fine. I don't have any anger issues, I don't hate my parents, I don't want to kill everyone I meet. I am a productive member of society now and successful. I think spankings are fine, as long as you make it clear that it is a punishment and you don't over due it.
You shouldn't mindlessly beat the shit out of your kid, but a pop on the butt is fine. You just can't hit them and throw them away in their room... After you spank them you go right back to how it was so they realize that you aren't spanking them because you hate them, but because they did something wrong.
tl;dr version:
If you want to spank your kids don't over due it and let the kid realize that after it happens everything is fine and that you still love them.
Oh, I remember a long time ago I was riding the car with my mom and I told her to shut up. She smacked me in the mouth... I have never told another authority figure or someone above me to shut up ever again.
My parents simply spanked me on the wrist if I did something wrong. I learned not to do whatever it was and it wasn't anywhere near abuse.
I heard that some people like being spanked.
[QUOTE=Red_Eyes;26364594]Physical punishment (when not exaggerated like some examples of punching and whips) was used for so many years, but recently it started being frowned upon. It's probably just a coincidence that you also recently started seeing kids doing what ever they want in class rooms because they know no one will touch them.[/QUOTE]
Absolute bullshit. Kids have always acted like kids, regardless of time period.
[quote=(Hesiod, 8th century BC) ]I see no hope for the future of our people if they are dependent on frivolous youth of today, for certainly all youth are reckless beyond words... When I was young, we were taught to be discreet and respectful of elders, but the present youth are exceedingly wise [disrespectful] and impatient of restraint [/quote]
There is no evidence, anywhere, that I can find that shows any semblance of a correlation between the decline in physical punishment and overall behavior, outside of a few anecdotes from grumpy old men or people whose horses are a few feet too high.
My dad was, and still is, a complete douchebag. He has always started fights for no reason, blaming them on the other person, because, I can only assume, he enjoys them. The only way he can express emotion is by shouting and arguing. When I was younger and too small to fight back, he would always hit me, same applies to my brother, whenever we disagreed. He's a bully and a terrible father.
One time he had been shouting at me every chance he got for 3 days solid, then we were watching TV and he asked me what I wanted on. I said I don't care and he shouted "What do you care about!?" to which I responded "not you." He kicked me so hard in the leg I couldn't walk for hours.
I fucking despise him.
My point is, people like him will always be around, and as long as they are, "corporal punishment" can't be allowed.
I got spanked all the time as a kid for various things and I'm not traumatized because of it, I don't think I am better off because I got spanked but I'm not going to write a book saying being spanked as a child turned me into a serial killer either.
[QUOTE=~ZOMG;26365380]
My point is, people like him will always be around, and as long as they are, "corporal punishment" can't be allowed.[/QUOTE]
There's a difference between getting spanked/slapped a few times for fucking up and being kicked around for no reason.
My dad was heavily against corporal punishment, primarily because his mother once hit him on the head with a frying pan from behind when he pissed her off. Also she kicked him out of the house when he was 16 with no job, and once when he was a kid he rode his bike into a bus on slippery roads and she sold his bike.
The wierd thing is, she was actually a really nice person.
[QUOTE=zombieslaya;26365521]I got spanked all the time as a kid for various things and I'm not traumatized because of it, I don't think I am better off because I got spanked but I'm not going to write a book saying being spanked as a child turned me into a serial killer either.
There's a difference between getting spanked/slapped a few times for fucking up and being kicked around for no reason.[/QUOTE]
I guess you've never been actually beaten.
Were talking to a load of kids who still get smacked by their parents, I don't think that polls going to be very accurate.
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