Depression, anxiety, suicidalism and similar disorders, issues and troubles V3 - Discussion, help an - General

I'm fighting the OCD urges and it's becoming unbearable.

Got the same problem Rexxasaurus. Probably only difference is that people left me and I feel like no one cares that I'm alive anymore.

[QUOTE=Rexxasaurus;43919912]I've been acting ungodly irrational as of late towards everyone. My friends (all of which are on steam) don't even talk to me any more. I've pushed myself away from some of my best friends, and I just sit around in my room doing absolutely nothing all day. I feel like a fucking moron at this point. I was able to survive loneliness and such in high school, but it just seems now that it's getting more and more difficult to the point where I want to kill myself. It's a problem because I have nobody to go to IRL. I'm pretty much just sitting in my room for the entire time just hoping someone comes on so I can talk to them, if only for a little while. It sucks.[/QUOTE] Maybe they're thinking the same as you and waiting for the other person to initiate the conversation.

I've come to the realization that I'm pretty dull, my life is pretty dull, and that no one really cares about me I guess.. I don't know where to place myself. I used to get bullied a lot when I was a kid, and each day I would go home and play videogames, where I forgot about everything. Now I'm not even having fun with games anymore, and so I just sit and browse forums without actually reading anything, just thinking. I don't want to do anything. I just want to sleep. [editline]17th February 2014[/editline] I don't know what I'm doing with my life. School is just a long grind, that is almost over. Then I leave everything, and I don't even care. I feel empty.

I find myself wondering how many lives I would improve if I just stopped existing. I know it would improve mine tenfold.

I went to the doctor on my birthday about depression and whatnot, although I really didn't want to go my family kept telling me I should so I bit the bullet. I've spent the past few years dealing with shit more or less on my own, partly because I feel that I can't really talk to people but also because it's my problem and no one else's. I sort of saw going to the doctor about stuff like that as wasting his time. Anyway, he said that I show huge signs of depression and he's going to be referring me to a counsellor and possibly put me on medication. On the one hand I'm kind of relieved to finally be getting help, it's pretty evident that my "Deal with it and try to get on" tactic wasn't working at all, but on the other I really don't like the idea of medication. The way I see it, medication regarding that sort of thing would just be covering up the problem instead of actually helping me.

[QUOTE=Trainbike;43952438]I went to the doctor on my birthday about depression and whatnot, although I really didn't want to go my family kept telling me I should so I bit the bullet. I've spent the past few years dealing with shit more or less on my own, partly because I feel that I can't really talk to people but also because it's my problem and no one else's. I sort of saw going to the doctor about stuff like that as wasting his time. Anyway, he said that I show huge signs of depression and he's going to be referring me to a counsellor and possibly put me on medication. On the one hand I'm kind of relieved to finally be getting help, it's pretty evident that my "Deal with it and try to get on" tactic wasn't working at all, but on the other I really don't like the idea of medication. The way I see it, medication regarding that sort of thing would just be covering up the problem instead of actually helping me.[/QUOTE] Remember, you absolutely do not have to take medication if you don't want to. It is your choice and your choice alone. Tell your doctor and counselor any concerns you have. They will not be offended and in fact will appreciate you being honest. I personally have been on numerous medications over the years, and if you want I can tell you about my experiences and opinions. One more thing, [B]going to the doctor was an incredibly brave thing of you to do.[/B]

[QUOTE=GeneralSpecific;43952821]Remember, you absolutely do not have to take medication if you don't want to. It is your choice and your choice alone. Tell your doctor and counselor any concerns you have. They will not be offended and in fact will appreciate you being honest. I personally have been on numerous medications over the years, and if you want I can tell you about my experiences and opinions. One more thing, [B]going to the doctor was an incredibly brave thing of you to do.[/B][/QUOTE] Yeah I know I don't have to take anything if I really don't want to. I'll need to wait until I get more specifics I suppose, in order to make a more informed decision on that sort of thing and talk to my doc about it more too. Thanks.

I feel like I should post around here a little bit, but I don't really have much that I want to say.

Little unsure if should've posted or not.

[QUOTE=Eonart;43956168]Why do people think it's so funny to exploit legitimate emotional vulnerabilities Why do I have to be surrounded by those types of people Why can I only be with nice people a few hours per day [editline]18th February 2014[/editline] Why do people think it's so fucking easy to not get mad like as if it's flicking a fucking switch[/QUOTE] Can you be a little less vague? Then we could try and help.

[QUOTE=Trainbike;43952438]I went to the doctor on my birthday about depression and whatnot, although I really didn't want to go my family kept telling me I should so I bit the bullet. I've spent the past few years dealing with shit more or less on my own, partly because I feel that I can't really talk to people but also because it's my problem and no one else's. I sort of saw going to the doctor about stuff like that as wasting his time. [/QUOTE] Hi me.

I mentioned this in Shit that gets you mad thread in fast threads, but I specialize in the creation of binaural beat and pure tone programs that are capable of helping with psychological issues and disorders. It is very safe, and works by cleansing you from the negative elements by making you directly confront them. As a result the programs frequently make you go into severely depressive or generally dark periods before making you noticeably better, just something that I need to warn you about. Please contact me if you are interested, I am genuinely interested in helping. You have nothing to lose by briefly trying it out and observing the results.

Rant time.....yay What do you do when you look in the mirror and see someone you hate? I'm a pathetic person. A shadow of my former self in every way. I used to be outgoing and sociable, now I'm a lonely shut in. I used to be good at self control, now I'm a borderline alcoholic. I used to be happy, now I feel I'd be better off in an unmarked shallow grave. Valentine's day, I couldn't do anything but get drunk because I'm jealous of all of my friends. That's all I did, drink, cry, and feel sorry for myself. I could be out with someone, but instead I chose to put myself away, to let those people have a good time without having to see me. I had my dream of being a cop crushed by a teacher who basically told me I'm a failure at everything. She's right, a fat self pitying psycho isn't cop material. It isn't anything material. And lastly, I can't help but think I'm just a burden on my grandma. She shouldn't have to put up with my shit, nobody should. End rant. I'm off to hit the bottle and cry about how much of a fuck up I am.

really down right now. right now, I'd say I got a single friend on the internet. and it feels like he's drifting away, I don't know. I'd usually talk to him about this, but I just don't know how to word myself. I'm just so exhausted and broken, eyes all watered up. feel like an idiot, a douchebag, a bad friend. I feel like I'm doing everything wrong. that I'm childish and push the boundaries. I'm never mad at him, he does nothing wrong. he helps me pay for my VPS, he keeps buying me gifts on steam, he's being a good friend, etc. I can't provide gifts, I can't repay, I have no money. I feel like I'm always talking about myself to him. I feel I've done stuff to piss him off a lot lately, even though he claims he wasn't pissed, just a little unhappy. call me crazy, but I feel that's just clever wording for being pissed to make me as little upset as possible. I have no one but him and my cats really. if I lose him, why should I bother pushing on? it used to be my cats, but hell, they'd probably not even notice that I'm gone. I don't want to fight anymore, I don't want to fix my anxiety and depression, I don't want to continue living a life which is doomed to fail anyway. I'm alone, I have no friends, my girlfriend left me because I was obsessive, all my friends left me for some reason, I'm horrible, I'm a douche, there's nothing of value in me

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[QUOTE=PredGD;43987430]really down right now. right now, I'd say I got a single friend on the internet. and it feels like he's drifting away, I don't know. I'd usually talk to him about this, but I just don't know how to word myself. I'm just so exhausted and broken, eyes all watered up. feel like an idiot, a douchebag, a bad friend. I feel like I'm doing everything wrong. that I'm childish and push the boundaries. I'm never mad at him, he does nothing wrong. he helps me pay for my VPS, he keeps buying me gifts on steam, he's being a good friend, etc. I can't provide gifts, I can't repay, I have no money. I feel like I'm always talking about myself to him. I feel I've done stuff to piss him off a lot lately, even though he claims he wasn't pissed, just a little unhappy. call me crazy, but I feel that's just clever wording for being pissed to make me as little upset as possible. I have no one but him and my cats really. if I lose him, why should I bother pushing on? it used to be my cats, but hell, they'd probably not even notice that I'm gone. I don't want to fight anymore, I don't want to fix my anxiety and depression, I don't want to continue living a life which is doomed to fail anyway. I'm alone, I have no friends, my girlfriend left me because I was obsessive, all my friends left me for some reason, I'm horrible, I'm a douche, there's nothing of value in me[/QUOTE] Of course you are of value, atleast I think so. Please, try to bear on, after all he probably said it to make you feel better, not to make you think this way. I'm pretty sure he wants you to be happy, and don't think of this one incidence. My friends are like that, they forget about after a while, we don't because we think too much about it. Try to out it behind you, if he still is with you, you are value to him. Hope that helps you a little bit, because this is probably the only advice I can give because my friends are something like that when I lose my cool. Hope it helps.

Trying to be someone you can not be, regardless of how much you try, which is the accepted norm in this society is a bitch... [editline]21st February 2014[/editline] Whats with us Norwegians posting in this thread like right after each other ? :v:

[QUOTE=Black;43992643]Trying to be someone you can not be, regardless of how much you try, which is the accepted norm in this society is a bitch... [editline]21st February 2014[/editline] Whats with us Norwegians posting in this thread like right after each other ? :v:[/QUOTE] Thread conquer! [editline]21st February 2014[/editline] Talked to the girl I liked so much, she realizes/believes she has BPD, which really sucks. She feels no love or happiness, nor does she feel pain or sorrow that well. She seemed pretty shaken about it, and I felt really bad, like I should be with her and help her/make her feel better. I feel so bad for her, I was so tapped by energy that I just went to bed and slept for around 3 hours. And now it's vacation, and the girl that is her bestfriends with doesn't now this, and I can't stand her at this point, I'm afraid of her. Afraid that she will begin to examine me again, point out shit that's wrong. She said she wanted to do something this vacation, but I just want to be alone because I'm not coping very well with my life at this point... Also I'm starting to realize that I'm bipolar with DID... It's grinding me, because I just want to be a normal guy, a person that can go a whole week without feeling fucking terrible over nothing with mania everyday so often...

In one of my depressive states again. That, and the whole world it seems is against me for things they will never understand. Fucking whatever.

I feel like I have to repeat these thoughts in my head all the time. I do it at least 12 times a minute and it's becoming unbearable. Every time I try to not to do it I feel like really anxious and tensed up. I can't deal with this anymore. Sometimes I wouldn't mind if I got hit by a car.

The only way I feel like I can come to terms with everything is by writing about it. I mean, like an actual book that I am writing. Even then I doubt it will help but it gives me something to do. I am going insane otherwise. Whoever wants to read a twisted romance between a piece of shit and an evil suicidal girl, well, I guess that's for you.

Im another one of those people who constantly wonders if other people actually like me when im with them, Usually ends up with overthinking things and getting myself in a bad mood. Seems to be a common thing.

I'm not sure about this but is there such a thing as being too happy? Basically, not to brag, but I think my life is pretty cool. I'm a healthy human with no problems. I'm hardly ever sad and have few reasons to be sad. I just want to know if there is a reason for me to always be this happy and if there is a chance this could be mentally unhealthy? [B]Even mondays don't dampen my mood.[/B]

Feel like I'm losing my mind sometimes. Sometimes I don't know what to do with my life, whereas sometimes I feel really good and motivated. I used to love spending all day playing video games with my friends, but now I find it hard to even motivate myself to play more than five minutes. I'm spending most of the day watching tv series online and barely registering what's happening.. I feel like my life is meaningless and I feel like I'm doing nothing with it at the moment, and whenever I try to do something new, I usually lose interest quickly and go back on the computer doing nothing.. I have no friends in real life that I actually hang out with, and I complain about that, but when I do hang out with them, I want to leave after an hour. Or I hang out with them once or twice, then lose interest in them. It sucks because I start off really motivated to do something, and get hyped and excited about it, like complete a game or learning to play guitar or seeing a friend, and I lose interest really quickly in it.. Usually before I lose interest I'll spend all day at work thinking about what I'm going to do in that particular game or something, then when I get home and have a chance to play, I can't even be bothered to boot it up..

[QUOTE=FaythNihlus;44005573]Feel like I'm losing my mind sometimes. Sometimes I don't know what to do with my life, whereas sometimes I feel really good and motivated. I used to love spending all day playing video games with my friends, but now I find it hard to even motivate myself to play more than five minutes. I'm spending most of the day watching tv series online and barely registering what's happening.. I feel like my life is meaningless and I feel like I'm doing nothing with it at the moment, and whenever I try to do something new, I usually lose interest quickly and go back on the computer doing nothing.. I have no friends in real life that I actually hang out with, and I complain about that, but when I do hang out with them, I want to leave after an hour. Or I hang out with them once or twice, then lose interest in them. It sucks because I start off really motivated to do something, and get hyped and excited about it, like complete a game or learning to play guitar or seeing a friend, and I lose interest really quickly in it.. Usually before I lose interest I'll spend all day at work thinking about what I'm going to do in that particular game or something, then when I get home and have a chance to play, I can't even be bothered to boot it up..[/QUOTE] Same here man, I complain all the time that I'm not doing anything, but at the same time when I want to do something, I never have the motivation to do anything anyway.

So apparently I'm starting to bald. I thought my hairline was normal until I noticed that I look like an old samurai if I pulled my hair back :v: I did some googling and apparently I'm in the first stages of hair loss. [t]http://i.imgur.com/SHNtErF.gif[/t] My hairline is number 3. I'm only 17 :v:

Holy crap that sucks. You should go to a dermatologist if you can. There are multiple reason why some on can loose hair. Some times there are things you can do to slow it down or even reverse it. Also I'm going to hazard a guess that you are really stressed out. Stress caused hair loss for me in the past, maybe the same for you?

I don't know what stress really feels like tbh

Two weeks in to my new job. I just feel as if it's just eating away inside me. I've gone to being quite sociable to pretty much telling everyone to fuck off other than 3 certain people. I'm in a bad mood all the time and today when my computer froze I absolutely lost my shit. While the job pays well and is a means for me to travel later on this year, I have my doubts I'm going to make it long enough to save money for it.