Depression, anxiety, suicidalism and similar disorders, issues and troubles V3 - Discussion, help an - General

[QUOTE=FreyasFighter;44295446]Yeah dude, I do the same. I comfort-buy, so to speak. Ever since my ex left me for his best friend's girlfriend I have bought things left, right and center. I think it's because I was mostly alone since then now, and I hardly ever see anyone or do anything, just sit on my arse all day on the computer. No motivation or drive whatsoever. :/[/QUOTE] SPEAK OF THE DEVIL! I have comfort-bought, again. >.< I wish that the Body Shop never exists :v: Then again I did buy a set for my mum (I don't celebrate Mother's/Father's Day, as I believe my parents can be spoiled any day of the year), and a few things for myself, some of which are necessities anyway, so *shrug*

[QUOTE=InvaderNouga;44307783]You should take your medication as your Doctor recommends. How long have you been taking the anti-psychotic for? Some medications take a bit of time to build up to a therapeutic level in your system. What medication is it?[/QUOTE] I took it for a few days but I just can't do it. I refuse to be in that state of mind, even if it is more peaceful. I'd rather find other ways to deal with it first.

I've lost all motivation to continue university study. I wouldn't want to work either. Hell, I don't even want to leave my room, let alone get out of bed most days. I used to take meds and see a shrink, but neither of them did much for me. I'm already falling behind on all my work and every day is another friend I'm shutting out of my life. I just don't want to do anything about it.

pretty sure all the friends im hosting a party for next week just made plans without me, and are ignoring my request to tag along 100%. i want to fuck up this party for them so badly. im on my own after the summer anyway.

[QUOTE=Oddshot;44318930]I've lost all motivation to continue university study. I wouldn't want to work either. Hell, I don't even want to leave my room, let alone get out of bed most days. I used to take meds and see a shrink, but neither of them did much for me. I'm already falling behind on all my work and every day is another friend I'm shutting out of my life. I just don't want to do anything about it.[/QUOTE] I can sympathize with this, but the best thing to do is to force yourself to be motivated, and just do it anyways. If you start giving up things will get a lot worse and reinforce that mindset..

[QUOTE=fox '09;44316859]I took it for a few days but I just can't do it. I refuse to be in that state of mind, even if it is more peaceful. I'd rather find other ways to deal with it first.[/QUOTE] Well if you are manifesting truely Psychotic behavior you should know the risks inherent from being non-compliant with a medication regimen. If you want to reduce the amounts of Psychotic behaviors you experience you should take them. That's your decision to make though.

I find it extremely ironic that my parents are going to a distant cousin's birthday party while I pretty much get nothing except $20 and a card from my caring grandmother

[QUOTE=fox '09;44322241]I can sympathize with this, but the best thing to do is to [b]force yourself to be motivated, and just do it anyways[/b]. If you start giving up things will get a lot worse and reinforce that mindset..[/QUOTE] People keep saying this but I don't understand how this works. If it was that easy this thread would be a lot smaller.

[QUOTE=Oddshot;44326260]People keep saying this but I don't understand how this works. If it was that easy this thread would be a lot smaller.[/QUOTE] It's hard but he's right though. People need to motivate themselves to action. Depression makes you feel like you don't want to do anything. Ultimately regardless of Depression or not we are still in control of our own thoughts and by extension our emotions in behaviors. People need to engage their negative self talk to get then out of their hole "Yeah I don't feel like doing anything but let me put myself in a position to have a good time". It really can be as simple as just getting the hell off the couch and just doing something, the hardest part is getting off the couch though.

He phrased it weirdly, it's not forcing yourself to be motivated as much as just forcing yourself to do it even if you'd rather stab yourself because you'll feel like fucking shit either way but at least if you force yourself to do it and feel like shit doing it, you still took a definitive step toward a better life rather than stalling.

Hello :3 I'm new, and friendly, I swear. I saw this thread, and I'm happy it exists. Y'all muffins don't mind if I'm here, right?

[QUOTE=ROFLBURGER;44312184]How does one even improve their e-social skills No fucking joke everyone gets upset at me for various reasons online. I do the same shit in real life and people like me. It's to the point to where people think that I deserve to be harassed for my attitude.[/QUOTE] Yea, I go to We Chat and I see how you act. You just need to get out of there because you're completely incompatible with that place, yet you still need to stop acting so oblivious as to why people don't like you. You may not like them but you act pretty aggressively, often trying to pass your behavior off as a joke, towards them and they'll react accordingly.

Im 20 and for the last year and a half ive had mildly jaundiced eyes and regular abdominal cramps and pains, the symptoms haven't really got worse, they have just changed. Last july I had a liver biopsy (basically they stick a 8 inch hollow screwdriver into your liver and the hollow bit gets filled with liver tissue. while you are awake under local anaesthetic) and got diagnosed with autoimmune hepatitis, so basically I was prepared to live a life of being ill all the time and more than likely going to need a liver transplant before I turn 30. This was until I got called back after 2 months and was told it was a false diagnosis. At this point I was already at uni, I really cant describe the emotions I felt when I found this news out, I should have been happy but instead I was just really confused and angry, I lived for 2 months thinking I had a serious illness and then they just turn around and basically say "oops were wrong". Anyways I started getting tons of tests again and eventually I got a re-diagnosis in december "Gilberts syndrome" which is a "harmless" condition that differs from person to person, Well unfortunately I got the not so nice symptoms, Like depression, Brain fog which has put me in a state of depersonalisation / derealisation, Constantly jaundiced eyes, mild but noticeable, and mental fatigue which is different to standard fatigue, I dont get tired or lazy, my mind just feels constantly overwhelmed and it makes it very hard to concentrate or do anything. This brings me to where I am now, theres no treatment for gilberts syndrome and I am supposed to just manage it myself, But im finding it so hard and wondering if I am ever going to enjoy my life again, I feel like Im unable to do anything and have considered giving up which isn't like me at all. I had and still have great friends, an amazing partner and a Life that I should be enjoying, But this fucking illness has taken over and I feel hopeless. I go back to hospital for a check up in june, and I have a doctors appointment next week where Im hoping to get some form of guidance.

My hearing started getting worse over the last week. Like, my ears feel like they're blocked (they're not though), and it's harder to hear the direction of sounds. My neck is absolutely killing me too. I spent the whole day today sitting on the couch with a wheat bag on my neck. Could barely stay awake. I'm genuinely scared for my health. I keep googling my symptoms and I get back stuff like Multiple Sclerosis and Post-Viral fatigue and Lyme disease. I can't figure out what the hell is going on. And I keep feeling like shit for spamming the thread with this stuff like it's my blog. I just wish they'd find something. Anything.

[QUOTE=Weirdness;44328780]My hearing started getting worse over the last week. Like, my ears feel like they're blocked (they're not though), and it's harder to hear the direction of sounds. My neck is absolutely killing me too. I spent the whole day today sitting on the couch with a wheat bag on my neck. Could barely stay awake. I'm genuinely scared for my health. I keep googling my symptoms and I get back stuff like Multiple Sclerosis and Post-Viral fatigue and Lyme disease. I can't figure out what the hell is going on. And I keep feeling like shit for spamming the thread with this stuff like it's my blog. I just wish they'd find something. Anything.[/QUOTE] if it's of any comfort, these are things I'll usually struggle with, especially if I haven't been good at cleaning my ears or sat in front of the computer/TV/anything static most of my day. if you're really concerned you should pay your doctor a visit though [editline]23rd March 2014[/editline] while I'm here my friends father died two days ago, I got to know about it earlier today

[QUOTE=NateBeQuick;44327661]Hello :3 I'm new, and friendly, I swear. I saw this thread, and I'm happy it exists. Y'all muffins don't mind if I'm here, right?[/QUOTE] Welcome. Hope we can help whatever ails you :o

[QUOTE=Catscratch;44329591]Welcome. Hope we can help whatever ails you :o[/QUOTE] That's true, this thread is very useful and talking about ones problems really helps.

[QUOTE=ROFLBURGER;44325046]I find it extremely ironic that my parents are going to a distant cousin's birthday party while I pretty much get nothing except $20 and a card from my caring grandmother[/QUOTE] Never was the case for me, but it was for a lot of the people I knew There's just this hatred I can't explain. It really makes no sense.

Aw, well thanks guys, same goes for you all :) It's pretty today, for BC weather. But lately, I haven't had much appreciation for it. I've had depression for almost 5 years now, and I've had days when the skies are bright, and it's almost like before, and then the next day it wouldn't be. Thankfully today is a bright day. I hope you all have bright days sometimes, even if it's a small thing.

[QUOTE=PredGD;44295387]feel so guilty right now. I got $130 sent into my account this morning, and already burned $60 of it. this happens every time and I feel so guilty. I don't buy things because I enjoy them anymore, I buy them because I feel a compulsive need to buy it. I never have any money because of this, it goes straight out. whenever I have any money I feel anxious. I just have to spend it, and I hate that behavior. I have no clue why I'm doing it because I really don't want to. my only guess would be that I find comfort in buying stuff to occupy myself, since I don't do anything but sit on my ass anyway. any of you guys struggling with the same? would love to get out of this, I hate feeling so guilty for doing it. worst part is that I'm still craving to burn all the money. I want to save money, not throw it out of the window.[/QUOTE] I spend money like crazy but I found that if I have it take like $100 out of my paycheck and automatically put it into my savings where I can't easily touch it, I don't spend it. You should try that if you haven't yet.

i started seeing a therapist and he's really cool.

[QUOTE=Heigou;44327014]He phrased it weirdly, it's not forcing yourself to be motivated as much as just forcing yourself to do it even if you'd rather stab yourself because you'll feel like fucking shit either way but at least if you force yourself to do it and feel like shit doing it, you still took a definitive step toward a better life rather than stalling.[/QUOTE] Ah, right. Well I'm boned.

Still stuck where I was before the start of the year, htis is just the worst thing to be experiencing again. I just want some positive encouragement from somebody besides my friends and college professors for once, is that too much to ask? ;.;

[QUOTE=Zar;44319093]pretty sure all the friends im hosting a party for next week just made plans without me, and are ignoring my request to tag along 100%. i want to fuck up this party for them so badly. im on my own after the summer anyway.[/QUOTE] Then do it! Doing bad things is fun!

[QUOTE=LVL FACTORY;44343002]Then do it! Doing bad things is fun![/QUOTE] That's also why you people don't have much friends, if you shit on everyone at the slightest occasion, it's no wonder nobody would want to hang out with you.

So I skipped all my university classes and found out one of my relatives almost commited suicide and one of my other relatives is going to be staying with us for a while. I've got nothing. I shouldn't bottle it all up but if I open up even a little I feel like I'm gonna explode. What a mess.

My life isn't worth shit.

My family is constant being pissed because I get sad pretty quickly. I came home on monday and was pretty ill, but that ruined the whole day. So yesterday I was sick from depression and anxiety of my life, pianolessons and spanish classes. I'm a huge mess, but atleast I promised myself that I was going to survive. Problem is, my birthday have passed and I feel worthless again. And I can't tell anyone because of the tension or the fact I'll probably will not only be diagnosed as bipolar and with BDP, but I'll probably will be taken to a mental hospital. Fuck this, I'm so tired. I just want to be free and mentally stable...

I'm checking in with the counselling the uni offers tomorrow. I'm gonna tell them I'm depressed and that my hands shake pretty bad (essential tremor), but that's it. There's a lot more to it but I dunno if I'll ever be ready to talk about shit like that.

i want to sleep all day. i just lay there in bed, waiting for someone to reach out to me, but nobody ever does. i opened up to this girl and told her how i have been feeling down for months. it didnt help me feel any better and it wont do any good anyway. [editline]26th March 2014[/editline] it barely takes anything for my day to be ruined