The Super Friendly Social and Love Advice Thread v3 - February
10,002 replies, posted
My prom wasn't that great but I was glad that I went and experienced it.
It's a nice memory to look back on.
[QUOTE=MakoSkyDub;35752440]The latter
Idk if I'm normal but going out with a girl in the porn business is about as attractive a proposition as going out with a prostitute[/QUOTE]
I get what you're saying. Although, porn stars are actually very clean. They get tested for everything on a regular basis.
Prostitutes could have anything and not care.
[QUOTE=ScoutKing;35751137]So tonight is prom. I'm not going nor is a majority of my friends. I still don't understand the appeal of prom, nor does the majority of people that i know.
Maybe i just dont find getting dressed up, and going to a hotel that fun.[/QUOTE]
oh for fucks sake just go and do something you want to do.
hanging out with friends at prom is fun, even if you are only hanging out because of prom.
it's something to do.
[editline]29th April 2012[/editline]
[QUOTE=HookerVomit;35752257]I'd like to know from a guys point of view.. Would you date a girl who has done porn?
Not because you'd have an interest in how a porn star fucks or the "fact" that you [b]think[/b] sex will happen.
But, if you spot a pretty girl that you like, and you get to know her for her and one day, you find out shes done like 8 porn movies.. would you confront her about it and try to understand, or would you be turned off completely and never call her again?
The reason I ask is because, my friend does porn and shes very very pretty. She got this guys number tonight and some bitch told the guy that she did porn and he knew about it before he gave her his number. He seemed like a sleaze anyway.
But I digress; I guess to sum up my question is, would a "normal" guy care?[/QUOTE]
eyy it's hookervomit
what's up
to answer your question, it depends on how the "normal" guy views the relationship.
from my perspective, 8 porn movies isn't a big deal, all it means is that she's had sex eight times in front of a camera, probably in professional conditions so she wasn't enjoying it anyway.
that's not really a big deal for me.
[QUOTE=HookerVomit;35752973]I get what you're saying. Although, porn stars are actually very clean. They get tested for everything on a regular basis.
Prostitutes could have anything and not care.[/QUOTE]
Maybe so, but it ain't really about that. More the principle of selling yourself
[editline]29th April 2012[/editline]
I mean, you could probably say the same thing about a high-end prostitute or escort or whatever. Personally getting fucked for cash in "professional conditions" in front of a camera is much the same as doing it in amateur conditions off-camera. More pay and it's out there afterwards, but the premise is identical
Right, I was talking with a girl, of whom I have known for years (since tiny children). Then one day we went camping. We couldn't afford 2 tents so we slept in the same one.
I woke up with no pants on and her lying next to me naked.
What do I do? I don't want to talk to her about it incase she is offended etc.
[QUOTE=MakoSkyDub;35752440]The latter
Idk if I'm normal but going out with a girl in the porn business is about as attractive a proposition as going out with a prostitute[/QUOTE]
This is so ignorant. I mean, if it were the other way around, it would have been cool, right? You, sleeping with 8 different women on professional conditions, you'd even say it would amplify your manhood, right?
There's no principle, there's no actual logic behind this beyond a man's own ego. You are preventing yourself of something with no good excuse. I would date and fuck a pornstar. She's sleeping with me right now, why would I care how much sex she has had in the past and with whom and how?
No need to confront her or be turned off by that. The only way I could be turned off, is the way she exhibits her experience to the people around her.
[QUOTE=Seith;35754030]This is so ignorant. I mean, if it were the other way around, it would have been cool, right? You, sleeping with 8 different women on professional conditions, you'd even say it would amplify your manhood, right?[/QUOTE]
Hah yeah you've got me right down to a tee mate, well done
[QUOTE=HookerVomit;35752257]I'd like to know from a guys point of view.. Would you date a girl who has done porn?
Not because you'd have an interest in how a porn star fucks or the "fact" that you [b]think[/b] sex will happen.
But, if you spot a pretty girl that you like, and you get to know her for her and one day, you find out shes done like 8 porn movies.. would you confront her about it and try to understand, or would you be turned off completely and never call her again?
The reason I ask is because, my friend does porn and shes very very pretty. She got this guys number tonight and some bitch told the guy that she did porn and he knew about it before he gave her his number. He seemed like a sleaze anyway.
But I digress; I guess to sum up my question is, would a "normal" guy care?[/QUOTE]
It's not like you have to marry her
I got broken up with. She told me that she felt like a bitch, she said that she felt like I liked her more than she liked me, and that at prom she was having more fun with her friends than with me. She tried to pay me back for the ticket, and I told her that it was OK, I told her she wasn't a bitch for doing that because she felt bad. I told her she didn't need to pay me back, and I told her that she's not responsible for my happiness, just hers, and she should do what feels right and makes her happy.
I talked about that, and I told her that I probably wouldn't talk to her again since we're both going to college in a few months and school ends in a month, and she agreed with that and said she didn't think she would've wanted to do long distance anyway. She still felt awful. We were going to go to her house and cuddle up and watch movies, but instead we wound up leaving prom and she just dropped me at my house (I can't drive). It just feels awful right now, and it feels like it happened so fast, it feels unfair, and it feels like it could've worked, but it didn't.
My friend told me he wanted to help me win her back, but it just doesn't seem like it'd work, nor does it seem like it'd amount to anything if I have to "win her back" rather than her doing something of her own volition. The worst part is that I didn't even start truly opening up to her till last night, and it just hurts. I wish it didn't have to end like that. It's embarassing and sad, and I really care about her but I won't be able to say anything to her about it or change her mind, and she probably will heed my advice and try to ignore me and my mopiness.
It just really fucking hurts, and it sucks. I thought it'd work.
you're acting like an adult, take solace in that.
Ok guys lastnight was one of the proudest moments of my life
I was having trouble with a girl last week that i really liked but she blocked my fb and skype and everything. Pretty much said that she never wants anything between us ever again.
And so i was feeling down all week and i got invited to a party lastnight at my friends. I really felt like just getting drunk and miserable with my bestfriend so i went along. Anyways halfway through the night i caught some girl looking at me and so i just smiled back and kept talking to my friend. 5 minutes later i turn around and shes standing right behind me talking to some girl, she noticed me turn around and said hi to me and asked how i knew the host of the party. I kept talking to her for abit then went off to see a friend that arrived.
Half an hour later i was sitting with one of my friends and he got up to grab another drink leaving me sitting alone. She saw me alone and came and sat next to me and we started to talk. Some old tango music came on and she told me she knew how to dance the tango (Im petrified of dancing infront of people or even being stared at by a large group of people) and so i asked her to teach me. She took my hand and we walked upto all the people dancing and attempted the tango.
All of a sudden her tounge was down my throat and some people started cheering at us. I think i had drank the perfect amount of alchohol because i somehow managed to dance and makeout with a girl infront of a crowd without being embarassed or scared. She gave me her number and told me to call her.
Isn't alchohol the greatest!
[QUOTE=KnowProblem;35754994]I got broken up with. She told me that she felt like a bitch, she said that she felt like I liked her more than she liked me, and that at prom she was having more fun with her friends than with me. She tried to pay me back for the ticket, and I told her that it was OK, I told her she wasn't a bitch for doing that because she felt bad. I told her she didn't need to pay me back, and I told her that she's not responsible for my happiness, just hers, and she should do what feels right and makes her happy.
I talked about that, and I told her that I probably wouldn't talk to her again since we're both going to college in a few months and school ends in a month, and she agreed with that and said she didn't think she would've wanted to do long distance anyway. She still felt awful. We were going to go to her house and cuddle up and watch movies, but instead we wound up leaving prom and she just dropped me at my house (I can't drive). It just feels awful right now, and it feels like it happened so fast, it feels unfair, and it feels like it could've worked, but it didn't.
My friend told me he wanted to help me win her back, but it just doesn't seem like it'd work, nor does it seem like it'd amount to anything if I have to "win her back" rather than her doing something of her own volition. The worst part is that I didn't even start truly opening up to her till last night, and it just hurts. I wish it didn't have to end like that. It's embarassing and sad, and I really care about her but I won't be able to say anything to her about it or change her mind, and she probably will heed my advice and try to ignore me and my mopiness.
It just really fucking hurts, and it sucks. I thought it'd work.[/QUOTE]
Same thing happened to me literally last week, and it really does suck. You went one better than me and actually talked to her about what would happen after... I think I've left it too late now.
[QUOTE=I ARE REPTAR;35756186]
Isn't alchohol the greatest![/QUOTE]
This is the wrong way of thinking.
[QUOTE=I ARE REPTAR;35756186]Ok guys lastnight was one of the proudest moments of my life
I was having trouble with a girl last week that i really liked but she blocked my fb and skype and everything. Pretty much said that she never wants anything between us ever again.
And so i was feeling down all week and i got invited to a party lastnight at my friends. I really felt like just getting drunk and miserable with my bestfriend so i went along. Anyways halfway through the night i caught some girl looking at me and so i just smiled back and kept talking to my friend. 5 minutes later i turn around and shes standing right behind me talking to some girl, she noticed me turn around and said hi to me and asked how i knew the host of the party. I kept talking to her for abit then went off to see a friend that arrived.
Half an hour later i was sitting with one of my friends and he got up to grab another drink leaving me sitting alone. She saw me alone and came and sat next to me and we started to talk. Some old tango music came on and she told me she knew how to dance the tango (Im petrified of dancing infront of people or even being stared at by a large group of people) and so i asked her to teach me. She took my hand and we walked upto all the people dancing and attempted the tango.
All of a sudden her tounge was down my throat and some people started cheering at us. I think i had drank the perfect amount of alchohol because i somehow managed to dance and makeout with a girl infront of a crowd without being embarassed or scared. She gave me her number and told me to call her.
Isn't alchohol the greatest![/QUOTE]
Seeing as how you're going to college, this would probably be a good thing looking back a few years from now.
[QUOTE=HookerVomit;35752257]I'd like to know from a guys point of view.. Would you date a girl who has done porn?
Not because you'd have an interest in how a porn star fucks or the "fact" that you [b]think[/b] sex will happen.
But, if you spot a pretty girl that you like, and you get to know her for her and one day, you find out shes done like 8 porn movies.. would you confront her about it and try to understand, or would you be turned off completely and never call her again?
The reason I ask is because, my friend does porn and shes very very pretty. She got this guys number tonight and some bitch told the guy that she did porn and he knew about it before he gave her his number. He seemed like a sleaze anyway.
But I digress; I guess to sum up my question is, would a "normal" guy care?[/QUOTE]
I'd like to get to know one actually. I don't see anything wrong with dating one or even sex as long as she's the kinda person I'd normally date of course.
-snip no one replied-
[QUOTE=ScoutKing;35752204]You know, i can always go next year right?
I probably will, i just still fail to see the appeal in it.
And weren't you like extremely desperate to go to prom with a date you asked a ton of people out?[/QUOTE]
uhh, why even sweat it if you're not a senior anyway, facepunch is talking about going to senior prom, no one cares if a junior goes
and way to throw out what he was talking about a while back as if to somehow discredit him or something, A+ job there
[QUOTE=HookerVomit;35752257]I'd like to know from a guys point of view.. Would you date a girl who has done porn?
Not because you'd have an interest in how a porn star fucks or the "fact" that you [b]think[/b] sex will happen.
But, if you spot a pretty girl that you like, and you get to know her for her and one day, you find out shes done like 8 porn movies.. would you confront her about it and try to understand, or would you be turned off completely and never call her again?
The reason I ask is because, my friend does porn and shes very very pretty. She got this guys number tonight and some bitch told the guy that she did porn and he knew about it before he gave her his number. He seemed like a sleaze anyway.
But I digress; I guess to sum up my question is, would a "normal" guy care?[/QUOTE]
i'd probably be a little too jealous myself tbh
My friend is scared of her boyfriend. She was telling me how he loses his temper whenever she talks to another guy and shouts a lot and now she gets tense whenever he's around. She does want to try and make it work and he has said he'll get counselling to help his anger problems. I know him quite well and he's a bit of a computer/maths nerd like myself and I guess (mainly judging by what she is saying) she is his first proper girlfriend and they've only been going out for a couple of months.
If I were in either of their shoes I'd break it up especially as AS exams are only a few weeks away. If they want it to work he needs to stop his anger issues and she will need to get over her fears, which I doubt will happen this side of the exams with the stress rising and more time needed for studying.
I don't really want to give advice as neither of them asked for it and I may give bad advice.
[QUOTE=thisispain;35755018]you're acting like an adult, take solace in that.[/QUOTE]
Thanks. I'm feeling loads better, I've been chatting up my brother and my pal about it and both of them have offered a lot of good advice for moving on, or hooking back up if I so desire. I'm kind of wanting to, since I don't think her heart was really in it (the breakup wasn't something she gave much thought to, she made the decision as we were driving back and told me she was only feeling bad once she got to prom), but I'm not going to feel like it's the end of the world if I don't, I'm able to move on. All I know is, I'm going to school Monday with a grin on my face and my head held high, and I'm not going to feel shame for this.
[QUOTE=DeadKiller987;35758673]I'd like to get to know one actually. I don't see anything wrong with dating one or even sex as long as she's the kinda person I'd normally date of course.[/QUOTE]
I have 4 friends who are doing this porn thing. The guy who has done it(he's gay) told me that he was homeless and had no other income and he needed money fast. I found out about him doing porn through a friend and she sent me the link and I watched it out of curiousity. He looked terrified throughout the entire video and I felt really bad for him.
The girl I'm talking about says she only has sex with people shes dated or has known for years. She basically picks who she wants to have sex with on camera. Shes very prude IRL and she has a boyfriend.
Apparently, he doesnt treat her well and thats why she asked a guy out. But the fact that the guy KNEW she did porn and was being a manwhore about it just made it weird.
[editline]29th April 2012[/editline]
[QUOTE=Kingy_ME;35759953]My friend is scared of her boyfriend. She was telling me how he loses his temper whenever she talks to another guy and shouts a lot and now she gets tense whenever he's around. She does want to try and make it work and he has said he'll get counselling to help his anger problems. I know him quite well and he's a bit of a computer/maths nerd like myself and I guess (mainly judging by what she is saying) she is his first proper girlfriend and they've only been going out for a couple of months.
If I were in either of their shoes I'd break it up especially as AS exams are only a few weeks away. If they want it to work he needs to stop his anger issues and she will need to get over her fears, which I doubt will happen this side of the exams with the stress rising and more time needed for studying.
I don't really want to give advice as neither of them asked for it and I may give bad advice.[/QUOTE]
He sounds very insecure or very controlling. You should never be fearful of someone you love or constantly shouting at them. I hope he can learn to control his anger, but if he cant and it progresses to something worse, I'd tell her to leave him immediately.
Is it possible to teach someone empathy?
My friend is a complete asshole, and somehow he always manages to justify it.
He even went so far as to blame PMS for the issues between him and his ex.
However, his inability to follow along a conversation and relate to what was bothering her lead down a shit-spiral.
Point is, is it possible?
Because he desperately needs to learn it if he wants to cultivate a relationship.
And I feel bad for him- but then again, I bring something about relationships up, and he only half-listens because, after all, I've had none (and him a total of five months split between two girls that hated him afterward).
Back to is it possible?
[QUOTE=Phsykotik;35761673]Is it possible to teach someone empathy?
My friend is a complete asshole, and somehow he always manages to justify it.
He even went so far as to blame PMS for the issues between him and his ex.
However, his inability to follow along a conversation and relate to what was bothering her lead down a shit-spiral.
Point is, is it possible?
Because he desperately needs to learn it if he wants to cultivate a relationship.
And I feel bad for him- but then again, I bring something about relationships up, and he only half-listens because, after all, I've had none (and him a total of five months split between two girls that hated him afterward).
Back to is it possible?[/QUOTE]
You cannot teach empathy. You can only teach how to act like you have it to get what you want. There are tons of psychopaths who don't have any empathy and don't even know they are psychopaths. They just adapted to their environment and learned how to pretend they have empathy so they could fit in. They don't even know the difference. Hopefully your friend actually possesses empathy, and all he needs is someone to push him towards using that empathy. If he truly doesn't have empathy, which I doubt is so, then he is pretty much fucked emotion wise for life.
Tl;dr you learn to use empathy not learn empathy, he has to decide to use it if he has it
-no-response-snip-
[QUOTE=I ARE REPTAR;35756186]Ok guys lastnight was one of the proudest moments of my life
I was having trouble with a girl last week that i really liked but she blocked my fb and skype and everything. Pretty much said that she never wants anything between us ever again.
And so i was feeling down all week and i got invited to a party lastnight at my friends. I really felt like just getting drunk and miserable with my bestfriend so i went along. Anyways halfway through the night i caught some girl looking at me and so i just smiled back and kept talking to my friend. 5 minutes later i turn around and shes standing right behind me talking to some girl, she noticed me turn around and said hi to me and asked how i knew the host of the party. I kept talking to her for abit then went off to see a friend that arrived.
Half an hour later i was sitting with one of my friends and he got up to grab another drink leaving me sitting alone. She saw me alone and came and sat next to me and we started to talk. Some old tango music came on and she told me she knew how to dance the tango (Im petrified of dancing infront of people or even being stared at by a large group of people) and so i asked her to teach me. She took my hand and we walked upto all the people dancing and attempted the tango.
All of a sudden her tounge was down my throat and some people started cheering at us. I think i had drank the perfect amount of alchohol because i somehow managed to dance and makeout with a girl infront of a crowd without being embarassed or scared. She gave me her number and told me to call her.
Isn't alchohol the greatest![/QUOTE]
You cant always rely on liquid courage. Whats going to happen when you call this girl and you realize you aren't that brave? I'm only assuming this since you stated: [b][i]"infront of a crowd without being embarrassed or scared."[/i][/b]
If you guys remember my last post from a few days ago, basically she said now if I can prove to her that I can actually get a job, she'll consider me again.
The thing is, I would have gotten a job long ago, and maybe it sounds ridiculous, but god it's not easy. Sure I haven't been giving up, but it just seems like no one wants to hire. Though, now she said she's going to talk to the manager at McDonald's about getting me a job, so if that works out, it will seriously feel like God is smiling on me for once. I'm not giving up, not yet.
I am in the Friend Zone with one girl, and we have a very...platonic relationship. I want to ask her out to Foster the People in St. Paul, but I'm not sure if it is even worth trying because I think I may have changed her feelings towards me towards a relationship. Any tips?
[QUOTE=NINTENDUDECT;35762845]If you guys remember my last post from a few days ago, basically she said now if I can prove to her that I can actually get a job, she'll consider me again.
The thing is, I would have gotten a job long ago, and maybe it sounds ridiculous, but god it's not easy. Sure I haven't been giving up, but it just seems like no one wants to hire. Though, now she said she's going to talk to the manager at McDonald's about getting me a job, so if that works out, it will seriously feel like God is smiling on me for once. I'm not giving up, not yet.[/QUOTE]
I don't know about that, you'd been with her for a long time and she made a decision to move on
do you really think getting some part time job will make her suddenly see some brand new side of you and want to stay with you again?
you will still have your old problems, regardless of whether you jump through hoops for her or not
I'd say move on (but get a job anyway, jobs are good)
[QUOTE=Jo The Shmo;35762887]I don't know about that, you'd been with her for a long time and she made a decision to move on
do you really think getting some part time job will make her suddenly see some brand new side of you and want to stay with you again?
you will still have your old problems, regardless of whether you jump through hoops for her or not
I'd say move on (but get a job anyway, jobs are good)[/QUOTE]
Yeah I know, but she's said she isn't quite sure if she wants to move on or not. The thing is, she said the real reason she randomly felt like it was useless was because she couldn't see a future with me if I don't have a job. She said every day she feels that she misses me, but she's afraid of hurting me. In fact, she still texts me everyday and says she's far from happy. And she still wants to do things with me. I don't know, maybe it won't go well, but there's honestly nothing to lose so if I get one last chance I'll take it. If it goes sour, so be it, I'll give up. Either way at least I'll finally have a job and not be sitting around doing fuck all.
how old are you?
21. Feels like shit not having a job.
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