The Super Friendly Social and Love Advice Thread v3 - February
10,002 replies, posted
Well if he's the type to prefer his pride and his idea of "winning" over patching up a long standing friendship then you should probably just move on. You could try explaining like you have here and see if he feels similarly. It doesn't sound like something anyone should hold a grudge over 3 months, if he's a rational person he's likely calmed down and ready to go. For all you know he's thinking the same thing.
[QUOTE=Phsykotik;35973009]AI, you are a fucking moron.
That said, luck with it.
[editline]15th May 2012[/editline]
But make sure that you take the blame.[/QUOTE]
I fully take the blame for it, don't worry.
So I just found out i'll be in Costa Rica on a 'World Challenge' trip during my year 12 Formal. (Senior prom for non Australians)
I'm not sure how to feel about this.
On one hand I couldn't think of anyone that would want to go with me. But on the other it would have been nice to see if anything were to happen...you never know.
The good news is Costa Rica will be fucking awesome :v:
Sorry guys I've been busy as fuck recently so I haven't been able to post as much as I'd like to but SHIT I said hey to that girl today and literally as soon as she replied, she asked if I wanted to get coffee with her on Sunday, which was exactly what I was about to ask her.
I felt like a fucking excited prepubescent schoolgirl when I read that message holy shit. FINALLY EUGH.
I am happy with this.
Goodnight. <3
[QUOTE=darcy010;35977017]So I just found out i'll be in Costa Rica on a 'World Challenge' trip during my year 12 Formal. (Senior prom for non Australians)
I'm not sure how to feel about this.
On one hand I couldn't think of anyone that would want to go with me. But on the other it would have been nice to see if anything were to happen...you never know.
The good news is Costa Rica will be fucking awesome :v:[/QUOTE]
Why are you worrying about some overplayed disco when you're going to Costa Rica.
How do I know if a girl is constantly turning me down lightly (nor a direct no), because this girl is either busier then NYC on Christmas or shes just not wanting to do anything, ever. (And she is pretty busy, btw. Super involved)
because its consistent
its pretty obvious
[QUOTE=areolop;35982486]How do I know if a girl is constantly turning me down lightly (nor a direct no), because this girl is either busier then NYC on Christmas or shes just not wanting to do anything, ever. (And she is pretty busy, btw. Super involved)[/QUOTE]
If she wanted to hang out she would name another time.
Follow her to all the places she's busy with
it'll be romantic
Christ, Lukeo, you're like Godline, but somehow people tolerate you.
because he also posts things that are relevant and useful, unlike godline, who didn't even take the thread seriously and still posted
[QUOTE=thisispain;35973704]waiting for someone to apologize is a stupid thing because apologies are pointless. it's someone's action that counts.
if you want to be friends with him you have to reach out to him.[/QUOTE]
Apologizing is an action. It's an indicator that you value the friendship more than your pride.
i just met my S/O for the first time and spent 6 days with him after being together for a year.. went fantastically. he just flew home though, it'll be a few months before we see each other again ):
To be fair I only shitpost once the person has actually received advice
then I undermine everyone with my much better advice
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;35984309]i just met my S/O for the first time and spent 6 days with him after being together for a year.. went fantastically. he just flew home though, it'll be a few months before we see each other again ):[/QUOTE]
Significant other that you met online?
uhm
[QUOTE=Lukeo;35984379]To be fair I only shitpost once the person has actually received advice
then I undermine everyone with my much better advice
Significant other that you met online?
uhm[/QUOTE]
after meeting we spent half a year pretending we weren't interested in each other because of the circumstances (i was with my ex of 3 years at the time and we live on opposite ends of the country) but we eventually both gave up on dating other people. also neither of us are even remotely tolerant of the idea of online relationships but we were obliged to make an exception
[QUOTE=MountainWatcher;35984057]Apologizing is an action. It's an indicator that you value the friendship more than your pride.[/QUOTE]
not really people apologize all the time for stuff but don't really mean it
[QUOTE=thisispain;35984555]not really people apologize all the time for stuff but don't really mean it[/QUOTE]
It still means swallowing your pride and saying you were wrong (whether you mean it or not).
Hey, guys, I think I just kinda need to rant but if you have any advice for me that'd be great.
It's a very messed up story and I think it's time I explain it to others as well as myself.
It started back in October when me and her were working together in a play. We were best friends but I had always had some feelings for her, I doubted she had the same since she had been with her boyfriend for half a year and she seemed pretty happy. I had been telling her that we were only best friends for a while now and I had never really shown an interest in her. But then, on October 15th, she confessed that she had been cheating on her boyfriend with her fellow actor in the play and I confessed that I had liked her pretty much this whole time and she breaks down telling me how she had liked me too but thought I wasn't interested.
(This is point number one where I look back and realize how she's kind of a bitch. She had the boyfriend, but expected me to make a move. She was kind of telling me he was a dick but, nothing serious.)
So, we came to the conclusion that she would stop cheating with the actor and she would go back to normal while knowing that there was something between us. She starts telling me what an asshole her boyfriend is, so I tell her to break up with him. After another convoluted mess involving her trying to break up with him, I kiss her for the first time. A week after we do it again. She then realizes she really needs to break up with him, so she does. We go to parties and we hang out, we have a lot of fun. But then, she wants to get back together with him. She feels like their relationship is 'unfinished'
(Point 2 where I should have realized bitchiness.)
So, I'm really really hurt, but I get over it and realize that it'll end in it's own time. Eventually, it does. But not after I profess that I love her and that after a few weeks, she loves me. We have a few fights since she has issues with closing up and about her various problems but in the end, I think everything would end out alright. We have a few days together, just me and her, that were actually amazing, but we're busy during school so we do all this planning for this summer and how much we both can't wait.
Fast forward, my dad dies. She was there for me, supporting me and talking to me and she's really wonderful. She 'stayed open' for me, always asking about me and caring for me. Then, a week later, she stops. She goes back to her closed up self on the exact day where I needed her most. She then tells me that she's going to Prom with another guy and that not to worry, I'll take her next year. I freak out a little, but it's okay, I'm okay with it. A week later, she goes to prom and then goes to a party afterwards and had the time of her life apparently. The week after that, she goes to 2 more parties and apparently, inviting me is an after thought, she says that 'Oh, darn, I really should have invited you'.
The next day, she tells me that she doesn't want to date over the summer, that maybe in the future, but she wants to be best friends again. As every guy in this fucking thread knows, that's not that easy.
I'm extremely heart broken. A few days later, we talk again and she tells me what a wonderful week she was having and how next year will be awesome for her. Now, everything hurts.
[editline]16th May 2012[/editline]
Oh sweet christ that is a wall of text. Anyone who actually reads that is a true trooper.
[QUOTE=Luci-fer;35985032]Hey, guys, I think I just kinda need to rant but if you have any advice for me that'd be great.
It's a very messed up story and I think it's time I explain it to others as well as myself.
It started back in October when me and her were working together in a play. We were best friends but I had always had some feelings for her, I doubted she had the same since she had been with her boyfriend for half a year and she seemed pretty happy. I had been telling her that we were only best friends for a while now and I had never really shown an interest in her. But then, on October 15th, she confessed that she had been cheating on her boyfriend with her fellow actor in the play and I confessed that I had liked her pretty much this whole time and she breaks down telling me how she had liked me too but thought I wasn't interested.
(This is point number one where I look back and realize how she's kind of a bitch. She had the boyfriend, but expected me to make a move. She was kind of telling me he was a dick but, nothing serious.)
So, we came to the conclusion that she would stop cheating with the actor and she would go back to normal while knowing that there was something between us. She starts telling me what an asshole her boyfriend is, so I tell her to break up with him. After another convoluted mess involving her trying to break up with him, I kiss her for the first time. A week after we do it again. She then realizes she really needs to break up with him, so she does. We go to parties and we hang out, we have a lot of fun. But then, she wants to get back together with him. She feels like their relationship is 'unfinished'
(Point 2 where I should have realized bitchiness.)
So, I'm really really hurt, but I get over it and realize that it'll end in it's own time. Eventually, it does. But not after I profess that I love her and that after a few weeks, she loves me. We have a few fights since she has issues with closing up and about her various problems but in the end, I think everything would end out alright. We have a few days together, just me and her, that were actually amazing, but we're busy during school so we do all this planning for this summer and how much we both can't wait.
Fast forward, my dad dies. She was there for me, supporting me and talking to me and she's really wonderful. She 'stayed open' for me, always asking about me and caring for me. Then, a week later, she stops. She goes back to her closed up self on the exact day where I needed her most. She then tells me that she's going to Prom with another guy and that not to worry, I'll take her next year. I freak out a little, but it's okay, I'm okay with it. A week later, she goes to prom and then goes to a party afterwards and had the time of her life apparently. The week after that, she goes to 2 more parties and apparently, inviting me is an after thought, she says that 'Oh, darn, I really should have invited you'.
The next day, she tells me that she doesn't want to date over the summer, that maybe in the future, but she wants to be best friends again. As every guy in this fucking thread knows, that's not that easy.
I'm extremely heart broken. A few days later, we talk again and she tells me what a wonderful week she was having and how next year will be awesome for her. Now, everything hurts.
[editline]16th May 2012[/editline]
Oh sweet christ that is a wall of text. Anyone who actually reads that is a true trooper.[/QUOTE]
That hurts bro. I know the feel, don't let her pull you in again. I know that sounds stupid right now, but really, it'll be better for you in the long run if you cut yourself off from her and stop thinking about her. What you need right now is to assert yourself and show you have a backbone, and take some time to hang out with your other friends, maybe improve yourself a bit or take up a new hobby, and just forget about her. The more you hang around her, the more false hope you have and the worse you'll feel. Don't do that to yourself.
So last year there was this girl I was friends with last year, and I really, really liked her, even though she liked a guy who thought she dressed like a slut. I had forced my self to get over her over the summer, and due to me having no classes with her, interaction screeched to a halt. Cut to a week or two until the end of the school year, and I want to see how we stand on the whole friend thing. She's dating somebody (doesn't really matter), but see seems a bit hostile to me- she has an expression which is a cross between neutral and frowning, and is making a few passive-aggressive comments which are [I]very[/I] unlike her. There's also the fact that for some strange reason,[I]I can not make small talk with this girl.[/I] I have no topics, very little opportunity to talk to her, and the awkwardness requires a chainsaw to cut through.
Any ideas?
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;35984309]i just met my S/O for the first time and spent 6 days with him after being together for a year.. went fantastically. he just flew home though, it'll be a few months before we see each other again ):[/QUOTE]
I don't get this Significant Other bullshit
Why can't you just say boyfriend, S/O sounds so stilted and weird
[editline]17th May 2012[/editline]
[QUOTE=Justnobody;35986332]So last year there was this girl I was friends with last year, and I really, really liked her, even though she liked a guy who thought she dressed like a slut. I had forced my self to get over her over the summer, and due to me having no classes with her, interaction screeched to a halt. Cut to a week or two until the end of the school year, and I want to see how we stand on the whole friend thing. She's dating somebody (doesn't really matter), but see seems a bit hostile to me- she has an expression which is a cross between neutral and frowning, and is making a few passive-aggressive comments which are [I]very[/I] unlike her. There's also the fact that for some strange reason,[I]I can not make small talk with this girl.[/I] I have no topics, very little opportunity to talk to her, and the awkwardness requires a chainsaw to cut through.
Any ideas?[/QUOTE]
Ask if she's pissed off with you when she does things like that
Honestly, in so many situations "Is something wrong?" is a fantastic all-purpose phrase to cut through the shit. Instead of analysing someone's behaviour, you just ask, and they'll most likely tell you.
[QUOTE=Justnobody;35986332]So last year there was this girl I was friends with last year, and I really, really liked her, even though she liked a guy who thought she dressed like a slut. I had forced my self to get over her over the summer, and due to me having no classes with her, interaction screeched to a halt. Cut to a week or two until the end of the school year, and I want to see how we stand on the whole friend thing. She's dating somebody (doesn't really matter), but see seems a bit hostile to me- she has an expression which is a cross between neutral and frowning, and is making a few passive-aggressive comments which are [I]very[/I] unlike her. There's also the fact that for some strange reason,[I]I can not make small talk with this girl.[/I] I have no topics, very little opportunity to talk to her, and the awkwardness requires a chainsaw to cut through.
Any ideas?[/QUOTE]
Just ask her what is wrong.
[QUOTE=MakoSkyDub;35986345]I don't get this Significant Other bullshit
Why can't you just say boyfriend, S/O sounds so stilted and weird[/QUOTE]
i use it because it's gender-neutral. force of habit.
God Dammit:
I've been trying to get my self more confident around girls. I have a very attractive acquaintance that I talk to sometimes but never a real full conversation. I started to get into the conversation, and I was feeling proud of myself. That's when it happened. My friend thought it would be funny that while her and I were walking side by side to sack tap me. I somersault on the ground in pain, and try to take off after him, only collapsing as a wreck in pain; clasping my nether regions. Her jaw dropped as she backed away. God dammit.
so pretty much your avatar?
[QUOTE=MakoSkyDub;35986345]
Why can't you just say boyfriend, S/O sounds so stilted and weird
[/QUOTE]
people can call each other whatever the fuck they want
[editline]16th May 2012[/editline]
[QUOTE=Zambies!;35986708]God Dammit:
I've been trying to get my self more confident around girls. I have a very attractive acquaintance that I talk to sometimes but never a real full conversation. I started to get into the conversation, and I was feeling proud of myself. That's when it happened. My friend thought it would be funny that while her and I were walking side by side to sack tap me. I somersault on the ground in pain, and try to take off after him, only collapsing as a wreck in pain; clasping my nether regions. Her jaw dropped as she backed away. God dammit.[/QUOTE]
why do you people have such shitty friends?
if a friend of mine did that i would either drop them or tell them to leave me alone until they stopped being assholes.
tell him to leave you alone
[QUOTE=thisispain;35986751]
why do you people have such shitty friends?
if a friend of mine did that i would either drop them or tell them to leave me alone until they stopped being assholes.
tell him to leave you alone[/QUOTE]
I told him to fuck off and stop talking to me for a while.
Hi FP. First time posting in this thread. I went back through the thread and got the general idea that most people think long distance relationships are a bad idea. My questions are 1. does anyone know of a long distance relationship that ended up working out? and 2. If yes, do you know somethings that helped to make it work?
Going to college this year and wondering if its realistic to get into a relationship when we're both going to go to different schools a few states apart.
a relationship without some kind of physical intimacy is in troubling waters.
some long distance relationships can work (was it sawah that was posting about this i don't remember) as long as the people in them can actually see each other once in person once in a while.
[QUOTE=KnowProblem;35985466]That hurts bro. I know the feel, don't let her pull you in again. I know that sounds stupid right now, but really, it'll be better for you in the long run if you cut yourself off from her and stop thinking about her. What you need right now is to assert yourself and show you have a backbone, and take some time to hang out with your other friends, maybe improve yourself a bit or take up a new hobby, and just forget about her. The more you hang around her, the more false hope you have and the worse you'll feel. Don't do that to yourself.[/QUOTE]
How long should I go away for? should I ever return?
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