• The Super Friendly Social and Love Advice Thread v3 - February
    10,002 replies, posted
i don't know what you guys are complaining about sure, he's not the best conversationalist in the world, but the girl kept trying to make it happen and it looks like she's certainly interested, so what's the problem?
OK, so I'm like autistic when it comes to this sort of stuff.. I told a girl I liked her a while ago (and she likes me), but I'm losing interest because she always pays attention to other guys more than me (she flirts with them too), and I get kind of jealous. Anyway, she asked if I still like her, and I don't know how to tell her I'm losing interest without being blunt. And if she asks why, I'll have to explain and then I will seem like some clingy attention whore who always wants her attention.
[QUOTE=Autumn;36479117]i don't know what you guys are complaining about sure, he's not the best conversationalist in the world, but the girl kept trying to make it happen and it looks like she's certainly interested, so what's the problem?[/QUOTE] Well kopimi seems to have his balls in a twist about how i made a reddit culture joke, or maybe he hates me for some other reason unbeknownst to me. Either way it's only tangentially related to the actual post. I don't think it was the smoothest conversation but was it honestly cringe worthy? She seemed like she was fine with it, and the frequency at which she texted me leads me to believe she's truly interested. I didn't mention it originally, but some of the jokes in that log are in-jokes from work that we have. it's corny but it works. considering i've only known her for less than a month i think it's good to find common ground with her and milk it as much as i can.
[QUOTE=Electroholic;36479135]OK, so I'm like autistic when it comes to this sort of stuff.. I told a girl I liked her a while ago (and she likes me), but I'm losing interest because she always pays attention to other guys more than me (she flirts with them too), and I get kind of jealous. Anyway, she asked if I still like her, and I don't know how to tell her I'm losing interest without being blunt. And if she asks why, I'll have to explain and then I will seem like some clingy attention whore who always wants her attention.[/QUOTE] you know what dude, she might stop that if you get around to asking her out. just see. i think if you try it, and it turns out that she doesn't really change and she's still uber flirty, then you can just tell her you don't think it's working out.
[QUOTE=Autumn;36479117]i don't know what you guys are complaining about sure, he's not the best conversationalist in the world, but the girl kept trying to make it happen and it looks like she's certainly interested, so what's the problem?[/QUOTE] Well he came to love advice did he not Just because the girl was being friendly doesn't mean he shouldn't try to improve. Maybe she IS just friendly, or maybe he's really handsome so she's testing the water. In any case, from his texts and all of his other posts in here he seems super awkward and could really stand to work on his uh.. general social wherewithal I guess First order of business being to not talk about reddit or the literal temperature of urine
"my pee is 30c what about urs? some guy on reddit said his was 50!!! talk about epic"
so this girl wants me to shit on her chest, which way should I face? I feel like if I have my back to her it would be too impersonal but as the act itself is demeaning she might enjoy that aspect. Also what can you guys suggest for a diet leading up to the event? I feel having softer stool would work out better as it has staying power. Bunny nuggets would be an absolute nightmare so i'm thinking a mix of dairy and fruit would work. Thoughts?
terrible
[QUOTE=Parakon;36480167][B]so this girl wants me to shit on her chest, which way should I face?[/B] I feel like if I have my back to her it would be too impersonal but as the act itself is demeaning she might enjoy that aspect. Also what can you guys suggest for a diet leading up to the event? I feel having softer stool would work out better as it has staying power. Bunny nuggets would be an absolute nightmare so i'm thinking a mix of dairy and fruit would work. Thoughts?[/QUOTE] Oh god.
[QUOTE=Moonsorrow;36477053]Block the guy on facebook and ask every of your relatives to do so . Call the police (seriously) show them the chatlog and tell them what happened as a proof. This is going way too far and things might get out of your control and it could end up in someone getting seriously injured / killed.[/QUOTE] The guy was blocked right away from my facebook. And I've been talking to her and she wants to go back home. I said it would be better if she stayed a little longer so things might settle down and that we should call the cops. She immediately said no. Apparently fearing for/from him. God knows what shit the guy's been texting/calling her with. Now she's at work (she's in this part time job she found for the summer), and I'm afraid the guy might show up there or something. She's in that stage again where she's just fooling herself that things will be back to normal and she's thinking about going back. I don't want that. I've been able to contact her parents and I'm going to call them to inform them of what's going on. When she gets back me and her are going to have a huge talk about calling the cops on him. But once again. This may be an obsessive outburst from him. This kinds of things use to ease up after some time. I think it would be a good idea involving the cops in last resort. I'm going to talk to my parents too about this. I don't care what they say. I know I did the right thing.
I want somebody to love so badly I've become lovesick. Ugh
[QUOTE=MakoSkyDub;36479762] In any case, from his texts and all of his other posts in here he seems super awkward and could really stand to work on his uh.. general social wherewithal I guess First order of business being to not talk about reddit or the literal temperature of urine[/QUOTE] You're saying that as if i was actually using reddit lingo in my texts. Come on now. You guys are making a big deal out of something that probably barely fazed this girl. And it's not like i didn't acknowledge it was a poor choice of words. So you are making the assumption that i'm socially inept based on a small chat log and the fact that i made a joke about reddit. Kind of a big leap. If that were the case then this girl would have never bothered contacting me at all in the first place.
Alright guys. I'm in a bit of a rut here. I'm trying to make things right with my dad (Who my mother has divorced years ago and has a bunch of shit wrong with him) My mother says I need to "get a life" (That means to go and get married to a woman or some shit) and she says my dad is the only one that can help me with that due to our "culture". I'm gonna be honest. I'm 19 and I haven't had a girlfriend before. I also have some mild asperger's syndrome going on so I'm told I'm not very good at talking to women. So I call him up and there's already a few things wrong with him. All he ever wants to talk about are problems relating to my sisters (I don't even talk to them anymore.) Whenever I ask about him and how he's doing he just ignores it and tries to shift the focus back on me. He over analyzes everything I say to try and figure out if I'm lying or not. I'm thinking to myself "If it got up to this point I honestly don't think anything we do is going to work." At one point he just went ahead and said he wanted to spy on me (I don't know if it was a shitty joke or not) and another he just started mimicking me repeating everything I said. I don't know if he just acts weird (Since he did tell me that he has some sort of fear of leaving the house) or if he's just trying to fuck with me. And I'm serious. I REALLY think he knows I need something from him but he's just trying to make it as hard as possible. That fact that I haven't depended on this person for anything is making me think I don't need to do this. My mother is urging me to try to get him to meet somewhere and talk about getting me married. Everyone's going to be throwing shoes at me for this but I'm a Gypsy. I've been raised American but I'm a Gypsy by blood. I don't really like them either. This makes it much harder to get along with him. I told my mother everything but she still thinks that I should try to make it work. What do I do? What do I say?
[QUOTE=twoski;36475228]I'm awful at reading people but i think (if i had to go with my gut) that she's into me. I hate texting because you can never really tell what someone's real motives are unless they drop lots of incredibly obvious hints in the form of winks and shit like that. Can a ~pickup artist~ tell me what they make of this? Should i throw in some negs or initiate with light kino? Normally this kind of thing wouldn't be a problem for me, but in this case i have to be a little more careful. If this girl isn't actually into me then i have to deal with my [inappropriate] advances for the rest of the time we're working together at this place. So, as Le Reddit Community would say, i have to woo this derpina like a Sir.[/QUOTE] You're right, texts are just about useless for building actual attraction or connection over, so instead of wasting time on them and trying to analyse the deeper implications of a smiley face, call her up and organize an actual date. See what happens from there, but from what you've said she seems pretty into you. Also please never say anything like, "So, as Le Reddit Community would say, i have to woo this derpina like a Sir." again, not even in irony or satire. Just, don't. [editline]26th June 2012[/editline] [QUOTE=The Robster;36482126]I told my mother everything but she still thinks that I should try to make it work. What do I do? What do I say?[/QUOTE] Putting it bluntly, your dad sounds like a pretty shitty role model and not someone I would want to go to for advice, especially social/love advice. You're 19, you're still young and shouldn't have to worry about getting married for another 10+ years or so, and you should let your mother know exactly how you feel about that. Aside from all the family-related shit, the usual advice of just getting out there and pushing yourself to be more socially aware and confident and everything else in the OP might be worth a look. Was your 'mild asperger's syndrome' diagnosed? And who told you you're 'not very good at talking to women'?
Well, this is starting to get real depressing. This is literally like the fourth girl who just stopped talking to me. I'll be texting these girls and everything seems to go, most even agree to go to the movies or something that, one day. They'll stop replying and never contact me again. The most recent I actually met up with and we hung out for a few hours and everything seemed to be going great. We were going to meet up the next day, but she canceled and said today we could but she hasn't been answering my few texts since last night. Like, I don't get it. I guess they think I'm boring? I wish someone would tell me what the turn-off was.
[QUOTE=twoski;36482092] So you are making the assumption that i'm socially inept based on a small chat log and the fact that i made a joke about reddit. Kind of a big leap. If that were the case then this girl would have never bothered contacting me at all in the first place.[/QUOTE] As I said, based on the text log and ALL of your posts that I have seen, you come across socially inept. So as I've seen you say a good few things over the last page or so I wouldn't say it's a leap at all, it's just what it is. Even if it was only as assumption after you made the one weird reddit paraphrasing for no reason apart you obviously being a redditor, you lost the benefit of the doubt by going on and on about how it was "ironic" and then posting that godawful comic The point is, even if your base intentions are fine, your "execution" is dreadful And as I also said, maybe she's just friendly like that or maybe you're handsome enough to warrant trying you out and that's why she contacted you :v:
[QUOTE=Dark_Light;36484131] Aside from all the family-related shit, the usual advice of just getting out there and pushing yourself to be more socially aware and confident and everything else in the OP might be worth a look. Was your 'mild asperger's syndrome' diagnosed? And who told you you're 'not very good at talking to women'?[/QUOTE] I was diagnosed with it. A friend on Steam seems to think by all the past stories I've told him that I'm just not good with women.
Alright... I just need to get rid of all of this. Every monday afternoon once a week I got school. For the past few months I've been sitting next to a girl which seemed to like me. Well and today the semester ended and I'm not gonna see her till Semptember 6th. When we walked out of school I wanted to ask her if she wants to go drink a coffee sometime and of course, get her phone number. I didn't do it... and now I regret it. I'm feel like a total dumbass at the moment. I was thinking of texting her on Facebook maybe... I just don't know yet. I would appreciate some advice.
Sounds like a challenge then. Either you dare rise against it or stay at home comforting yourself due to circumstances. [editline]25th June 2012[/editline] [QUOTE=jonoPorter;36486811]Alright... I just need to get rid of all of this. Every monday afternoon once a week I got school. For the past few months I've been sitting next to a girl which seemed to like me. Well and today the semester ended and I'm not gonna see her till Semptember 6th. When we walked out of school I wanted to ask her if she wants to go drink a coffee sometime and of course, get her phone number. I didn't do it... and now I regret it. I'm feel like a total dumbass at the moment. I was thinking of texting her on Facebook maybe... I just don't know yet. I would appreciate some advice.[/QUOTE] Learn from your mistakes, do not mellow in them. It's useless in everyway. Fear will always be there. Only tip I could give you is to go with it.
[QUOTE=Seith;36486812] Learn from your mistakes, do not mellow in them. It's useless in everyway. Fear will always be there. Only tip I could give you is to go with it.[/QUOTE] Actually I'm glad now that I didn't do it. After doing A LOT of internet research I found out that she is in a relationship. [editline]26th June 2012[/editline] Can't deal with it.
[QUOTE=Seith;36486812]Learn from your mistakes, do not mellow in them. It's useless in everyway.[/QUOTE] *wallow jono, i think you should go for it (ask her for her number). you have very little to lose, and if she's not interested then you have a good few months before you have to see each other again.
[QUOTE=jonoPorter;36488946]Actually I'm glad now that I didn't do it. After doing A LOT of internet research I found out that she is in a relationship. [editline]26th June 2012[/editline] Can't deal with it.[/QUOTE] it's times like these where you pat yourself on the back and say "nice fold jono, nice fold"
[QUOTE=Autumn;36489129]*wallow jono, i think you should go for it (ask her for her number). you have very little to lose, and if she's not interested then you have a good few months before you have to see each other again.[/QUOTE] Well... I will if I get the chance for that. It's not like we see each other all the time. But hell... I will try, just like you said, I don't have much to lose.
[QUOTE=jonoPorter;36488946]Actually I'm glad now that I didn't do it. After doing A LOT of internet research I found out that she is in a relationship. [editline]26th June 2012[/editline] Can't deal with it.[/QUOTE] Hey welcome to my life. Facebook is such a great tool for determining whether or not you should ask someone else out. For me, every single woman I've had interest in has been in a relationship. Facebook, you saved me from so many awkward situations. :v:
[QUOTE=Gmod4ever;36489448]Hey welcome to my life. Facebook is such a great tool for determining whether or not you should ask someone else out. For me, every single woman I've had interest in has been in a relationship. Facebook, you saved me from so many awkward situations. :v:[/QUOTE] Well but I wanted to ask her out irl first and not on Facebook but now it probably has to be Facebook :tinfoil:
Don't ask her out via facebook, it's tacky. Do it in person or not at all.
[QUOTE=jonoPorter;36489597]Well but I wanted to ask her out irl first and not on Facebook but now it probably has to be Facebook :tinfoil:[/QUOTE] I didn't mean ask over Facebook. :v: I meant look at her profile on Facebook. "Oh look she's already in a relationship, and it looks like she's been in this one for three years now. I guess it's a good thing I never asked her out." :v:
Asking out through facebook/internet is really bad, and in person is much more fun anyway. You get a high afterwards. I've never gotten a high from girls telling me that they like me through the internet, even though it does still feel nice.
so i took a shitty awkward conversation and kinda turned it around. [code] me: you worry too much! :) her:hmm, i guess so. i guess i'm a freak. me: yep guess so! haha i keed. her:keed? me: you gotta say it in a foreign accent. Doesn't work well as a text i guess.:P her: ohh you're a strange one her: Can i swap a shift with [girl] on [date]? me: Yeah i'll look into it tomorrow. her: Thanks, i feel guilty when i ask all the time for changes me: Lol everyone has to ask me, it used to be total anarchy. ;p her: Yeah but i feel bad. me: Well you can buy me a beer if it makes you feel better lol. her: Sure. let's go with that[/code] i dunno if i should cement it further or leave it at this. any closing comments i should add? UPDATE. Fuck it we're doing this shit live. I haven't been forward enough with our last conversations. [code] me: Okay, i'll hold you to it :) her: ohh no... her: lol her: ttyl :) nite me: nite :) [/code] it's late and i've got a bad headache so i'm going to bed. do y'all think she's digging me? i think she would have stopped the convo if she wanted, long ago. we're texting eachother at 12:30 am, some sort of chemistry has to be here. what do y'all think. what should my next moves be?
i think you shouldn't take these short text conversations so heavily
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